Until the End of Time
by Icemera
Summary: When Madam Fujino requested her presence, Natsuki was forced to return to the island. The myth concerning the missing Fujino bracelet still haunted Madam to her final days. Unexpectedly, Natsuki was transported back into the past, a whole new world awaiting her. There, she met a stranger, who owned the lost treasure. Sunrise's Hime/Otome. AU/OOC. Not historically accurate.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: **I disappeared for a long while, so it feels a bit weird to be writing again. =_= I didn't think I'd be back to writing again, or this soon, but something just urged me to put this idea, which has been floating in my head for years now, into words. No beta. Enjoy.

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><p><strong>Until the End of Time<strong>

"_I will cross the plane of time, every star to find you… Wait for me…"_

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**Chapter 1: The past long forgotten**

When her mother died in a car accident ten years ago, Natsuki Kruger thought that she would never come back to Fuuka again, but today changed all that.

In a white jacket and a pair of jeans, Natsuki stood in front of the black, rusty gates, watching the old, two-story manor, where she was born and spent her childhood years. It used to be haven for her, but life hadn't exactly been kind, and things changed since the accident. Her father took her back to Germany, and they never looked back.

"_Natsuki, I need you to visit Madam Fujino…"_ That was what her father told her two weeks ago. There was guilt in his eyes as he said it, but he wasn't going to take no for an answer. It was urgent. It was non-negotiable. Natsuki must come back here one last time to tend to the ailing Madam Fujino as it would have been her mother's wish to serve her master until the end.

_Oiii, but the woman is a witch!_

Natsuki grumbled as she tightened the heavy suitcase in her hand. She still remembered how strict Madam Fujino was, amazed at her mother's rigorous obedience towards her master. Unfortunately, Natsuki's rebellious nature made her the least favorite among dozens of maids' children in the manor. If she remembered correctly, she never earned a smile from Madam.

The twenty-year-old woman let out a sigh and pushed the gates open. She entered and walked along the graveled road leading to the building. Thin fog blanketed the grass throughout the yards. Soft wind caressed her hair and cheeks. The smell of the soil reminded her of the fun in her younger years.

"Natsuki-chan! Natsuki-chan!"

Natsuki turned at the familiar voice. Her face beamed at the sight of the bob-haired girl in a maid uniform. Tokiha Mai vigorously waved at her as she ran towards her childhood friend.

"Mai!" Natsuki dropped the luggage and gave her friend a big hug.

Mai grinned from ear to ear. "Oh, my God, how long has it been! I miss you so much!"

Natsuki broke the hug and nudged her friend. "Have you gained weight?"

"Well, there aren't that many girls left to fight for the food with me." Mai stuck her tongue out, blushing.

"Oh, where did everyone go?" Natsuki looked around and noted how quiet the place was. Years ago, there would be maids coming out to receive the guests, or gardeners tending to the flowers and trees.

The fiery-haired girl mildly shrugged. "A few years after you were gone, Madam fell ill. She ordered Ms. Maria to let go of many of the maids, saying that she didn't need them anymore. They were sad to go, you know. But, luckily, Madam was kind enough to keep Takumi and me around. Now that he's old enough, he drives her to places sometimes. I'm assigned to help in the kitchen."

"No wonder this place looks pretty dead."

"Natsuki, don't say such thing! This is our home."

"Yours, not mine," Natsuki said, picking up her suitcase.

"Two weeks ago, Madam suddenly asked for you, Natsuki. She made Ms. Maria call your father and asked for this one last favor from you."

"Yeah, I'm very puzzled that she wanted to see me. I wasn't exactly her favorite."

"But your mother was!" Mai said with the same joyful grin Natsuki always felt warm whenever she saw it.

"I'm not my mother, and now I had to drop my entire semester just to take care of some old woman I hardly knew."

"Of course, you knew her. You grew up here." Grinning, Mai led her friend through the front doors.

As soon as the two, tall, wooden planes parted, Natsuki took a glance inside the hall, where it was kept dark with curtains down. The smell, however, was not as damp as she expected, but the same smell of lavender as she used to remember.

Natsuki shook her head before following Mai in, grumbling to herself. "She never talked to me. Not directly anyway."

"Was that so?"

At the trembling voice, Natsuki and Mai looked up at the grand stairway, and saw Madam Fujino standing at the top, watching down at them. Nao Zhang, once an heiress of a Chinese billionaire, married a Fujino and saved the centuries-old, famous family from bankruptcy. She was seen as a hero to some, but a devil to many. Ever since she stepped into this manor, everything changed.

Madam Fujino looked much older than last time Natsuki saw her. The old woman wore black kimono, her gray hair pulled up into a bun. Even though her body had grown frail, her back hunched, the feistiness in her eyes still showed.

With a black, carved-wood cane in her right hand, Madam Fujino slowly walked down the stairs. "Has it been…ten… ten years…? You look so much like your mother."

Mai hurried to Madam Fujino's side and helped her down the stairs. "Please, be careful, Madam."

Natsuki put down her suitcase and bowed. "Hello, Madam."

Madam Fujino took her time to come down the stairs to stand in front of the raven-haired young woman. She squinted as she scrutinized Natsuki up and down, causing Natsuki to look away. "Your mother failed me. Not only she could not find it, she died and left me all alone…"

Natsuki raised her brows. "Find what?"

Madam Fujino's gaze steadied, her shoulders stiffened. "Your mother failed me, and you… you will, too. It's too late now… Too late."

"What are you talking about?" Natsuki frowned.

"Madam refers to the ancient pair of bracelets. You know which, Natsuki," Mai interrupted.

"Ah. _The_ pair." Natsuki rolled her eyes.

Madam Fujino looked away from Natsuki, discontent clearly visible in her jade eyes. "Such insolence. You're very different from your mother," she said. "Take her to her room, Mai. I want to take a walk in the garden."

"Yes, Madam." Mai bowed.

Mai let other maid help Madam Fujino, and then led Natsuki to the room upstairs, where Saeko Kruger used to live. While the maids lived downstairs, Saeko was given the privilege to live upstairs with Madam Fujino. However, when Natsuki was just a child, she usually spent her time with Mai and slept in Mai's room instead.

Both women entered Saeko's room, where it was kept clean, and the furniture still looked new. Natsuki put the suitcase on the floor and sat down on the bed. She caressed the creamy, cotton bed sheet, recalling how soft it had been back then. Strangely, it still smelled of her mother's soft, rosy perfume.

"Try not to upset her, Natsuki. She's very old now. She says things, but doesn't mean them," Mai said, sitting down next to her friend.

"After all these years, she still blames my mom for failing to find the bracelet. For God's sake, it went missing like… a thousand years ago? This is ridiculous." Natsuki shook her head. "I don't know why she wants me back here. I don't want to watch her die. I don't even want to be near her now that she's still alive. And if she thinks that I'll try to find the freakin' bracelet like my mom did, she's sorely mistaken."

Mai giggled. "Then why are you here, Natsuki?"

"Dad insisted. Damn it. I wanna go home already," Natsuki pouted, lying back down on the bed and drumming her fingers on her tummy.

At Mai's smile, she knew what her friend was thinking. Even if her father didn't force her, Natsuki herself knew she couldn't really ignore Madam Fujino's request. It was something she never understood. Perhaps, it was just how her mother was deeply devoted to Madam. Perhaps, it was something about the manor that kept haunting her every now and then even after she moved to Germany ten years ago.

"I was born here…" Natsuki said, her tone softer. "I kinda missed it… except the bracelet thing that made my mom work on some useless shit for years."

"But it's very important to the Fujino family. It's natural that Madam would want it back."

"Oh, come on. She was a Zhang. A billionaire. I doubt some bracelet means that much to her."

Mai patted Natsuki's shoulder and got up. "Be positive, Natsuki-chan. I'll go fetch you some water."

"Thanks, Mai." Natsuki sat up and ran her hand through her hair. She did feel thirsty and tired from the long flight. Her gaze then found the window and the familiar, creamy curtains. She walked up to admire the beautiful view of the garden. She could see the old woman walking through the garden with a maid following her every step. She couldn't help but wonder how Madam Fujino was so generous in giving her mother such a good room.

_The bracelet… Why so obsessed with it…?_

Her mother once told her a story about the pair of bracelets that were treasures of the Fujino family, an emerald and a ruby bracelet. The pair was passed through generations of firstborn son. When engaged, he would dutifully give one of the bracelets to his fiancée as a promise. It was said that only until both owned the bracelets, their love would be cursed. Unfortunate, bizarre stories continued to haunt the Fujino family for centuries for the ruby bracelet had been missing for almost a thousand years.

Nao Zhang received the emerald bracelet as a wedding gift from her husband, but had not found the other one. Even though he died only two years into their marriage, she had not given up in finding the ruby bracelet for the past fifty years.

Holding back a sigh, Natsuki tightly crossed her arms across her chest, watching the old woman move as slow as the time at the manor. Madam Fujino was still searching—still hoping, and the fact somehow pained Natsuki's heart.

_Maybe it's really too late like you said…_


	2. C2: A cup of tea and its memories

**A/N:** Thank you for the warm welcome back ^_^ I still find it hard to get certain words out. Haha. But thank you. Oh, it's been a long time since I uploaded a new story, so I kinda forgot where to click. The rating will probably go up in time. And I love seeing old and new faces! Good to see you all :D

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><p><strong>CHAPTER 2: A cup of tea and its memories<strong>

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**::**

Both hands cupping the warmth around the ceramic cup, Natsuki raised it to her lips and slowly sipped the hot green tea. She looked out the window to the long, graveled road, which had led her back to this manor. It amused her that, as she sat here in the kitchen, watching the same view as her mother did, comfort managed to surge above fear that had previously caged her. She relaxed as she leaned against the cool glass, her breathing easy and light. It actually felt good to be home.

When Natsuki saw a car pulled into the driveway, she turned to Mai. "Who's that?"

Mai rose from her chair and moved beside the raven-haired woman. "That's Sagisawa Youko. She's Madam's doctor. Today is a usual checkup."

"Oh, yeah, how's Madam doing?"

"You already knew that she had a kidney transplant six years ago. Aside from that, it's the backache and stuff. I guess it's the old age thing."

Natsuki frowned. "Doesn't sound too bad. Why did she want me here? Why me at all?"

"She's starting to have troubles remembering new things. Lately, she brings up stuff she did in the past a lot. So I guess she wants to see the people she once knew."

Watching the doctor come out of the car and greet Maria, Natsuki shook her head. "People born and die. Madam should just let it go and go peacefully. She's been much luckier than most people on earth already."

Mai smiled at her friend. "Memories are precious, Natsuki-chan. We all love Madam Fujino. We want to see her well again."

"She seemed just fine yesterday, commenting about my mom throughout the dinner. Next time, tell her that I'll eat with you guys. One meal with her is torture enough for the rest of the year." Natsuki shuddered, sipping her tea.

Mai sat down next to Natsuki and put one hand over her friend's lap. "Why was it so bad? Isn't it good to know that she respected your mother in some way and always thought of her?"

"One minute she mentioned my mom's death, but then talked about hoping that my mom could find the bracelet soon. She's losing it." Natsuki rolled her eyes.

The fiery-haired woman giggled. "I think you totally missed my point. Her illness is one thing, but the fact that she still remembers your mother is something else."

For a moment, Natsuki kept quiet, and then put the empty cup down. "I never want to grow old. It's scary when you don't remember who you are anymore."

"It is scarier when you cannot remember whom you cherish."

At the interruption, both Natsuki and Mai looked up at the doorway and found Maria in her usual gray, proper uniform. She looked as robust and unyielding as Natsuki always remembered, only with whiter hair now.

A smile broke upon Natsuki's lovely lips. She stood up and bowed. "Good morning, Ms. Maria."

Maria offered only a small smile in return, but Natsuki knew that it meant a lot. "I missed your homecoming yesterday. I had some errand to do in the city."

Natsuki mildly shrugged. "No problem. Looks like I'm not going anywhere for a while."

The sixty-year-old woman walked into the kitchen and took a moment to study the jars on the table. She carried a habit in inspecting every inch of the manor to be rid of dust. "You should not fret, Natsuki. Madam is ill, and she only needs you around to keep her attached to the present."

"But I'm someone of the past." Natsuki then had to look away when Maria shot her a glare, the same look she always got when she was a child.

"Sometimes you just don't know which is more important between the past and the present," Maria said. "It's been ten years since you moved away, but we all never forgot you, Natsuki. I hope life has been kind to you."

Natsuki smiled as she felt warmth filling her inside. "We're fine. Dad is doing well with his restaurants. We're very happy in Germany. Thanks for asking, Ms. Maria."

Nodding, Maria poured herself a cup of tea. Her demeanor was more relaxed than last time Natsuki recalled, or perhaps, it was just her aging. It disheartened Natsuki to some extent that everything in the manor was fading, everyone she knew jading. Even though she must admitted that she was somewhat contented to be back, having to witness the last phase of what to become only memories saddened her. Perhaps, sadness always came with joy.

**::**

**::**

It was well into the afternoon when the doctor left the manor. Natsuki was wakened from her nap when Mai informed her that Madam Fujino called her to the study room.

The room was kept dark with only the wooden blinds slightly rolled up, letting the afternoon sun to shine in a little. Just like how Natsuki remembered, the same, large, oak desk stood in the middle of the room, thick books on the shelves along the two walls. What she remembered clearly was the framed, old picture of a woman on the desk. It was the very same picture Madam Fujino was holding right now as she sat, studying the face as though it could solve all riddles in the world—all questions in her heart.

"She died fifty years ago from an accident… Just like your mother, everyone I cared for left me all alone…" Madam murmured.

Natsuki stood by the closed door, watching her.

The woman in the picture was Fujino Aiko, younger sister of Fujino Kazuo, Madam Fujino's husband. Aiko died in a car crash just a few months after she gave birth to her only son, Fujino Takeshi. Although the time Nao and Aiko knew each other and spent together was short, they were very close, and it was evident that Madam Fujino always had Aiko in her heart to this day.

Madam Fujino looked up at her for the first time since she had entered the room. "Do you believe in fate?"

The question left Natsuki speechless for a moment. She had never seen this fragile side of Madam Fujino before. She never believed in superstition, and her world was either black or white. She was contented that way.

"No, Madam… No…" she whispered.

The usual feistiness in Madam Fujino's eyes dimmed at the response, and Natsuki was caught breathless. She pressed the picture frame to her chest with both hands as if embracing it. "Maybe you're right. After all these years, I find it hard to believe now… You're right…"

Before Natsuki could stop herself, she moved towards the desk and stood close to the old lady. "Why do you want me back here? You know that I can't help you, Madam." Natsuki regretted as soon as the words came out of her mouth, but she had sworn to live by the truth. She hoped that she was doing the old woman a real favor.

Madam Fujino looked elsewhere, moving herself on the chair away from Natsuki's direction. "No one can, I suppose…"

It somehow pained Natsuki to see Madam Fujino so helpless today. She briefly closed her eyes and said, "I know very little about the bracelet, and it was missing for a long, long time. It might not even exist anymore. Please, Madam. Please, let it go."

At Natsuki's soft words, the hands that were holding the picture frame lowered for a moment, but hastily rose to Madam Fujino's chest once again. "No. No, you don't understand," Madam Fujino said, her gaze steady as she stared up at Natsuki, "You will never understand what it means until you know what love is!"

Natsuki inwardly sighed. "Well… well, I've never been in love. Yeah, I don't understand, and I probably never will. How can I help you then? Where do I start? You gotta give me something, or else… I just don't know what to do…"

For some reason, Natsuki's smallest interest in the mission got Madam Fujino excited again. The old lady moved forwards, coming closer to the young woman. "They said… They said that the ruby bracelet was missing, because Fujino Eiji gave it to his secret lover instead of his fiancée, and it had never been found again."

Madam Fujino reached out a hand and clutched Natsuki's, her whole body trembling. "Your mother believed that his lover, that bastard woman, must have buried it close to his tomb. Find it, Natsuki. You must find it. It will break the thousand-year curse. It… It will bring back…_ love_…"

_Love._

That was the answer to all doubts Natsuki had had. She almost could not believe her ears that, after all, Madam Fujino was just so obsessed with a long lost love.

_Does she really believe that finding the ruby bracelet could bring back Fujino Aiko…? Oh, God… _

Madam Fujino's eyes brightened with hope again like a child full of wishes, and Natsuki could only slightly nod at the request. She knew what she must do tomorrow. The Fujino tomb was a few kilometers behind the manor, and Mai could certainly help her around.


	3. C3: Like Lavender

**A/N: **I've been very busy with work, so this is all I could get out at the moment. I read every review, and I thank you for dropping by. I'm sorry I don't have time to reply to every single one of you, but I really appreciate it. Oh, and I don't think I'll be getting back to _Legend of the vampire_ soon. That story takes a lot of energy to write, and I just don't have it at the moment. +_+

That's it. See you all around next time!

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><p><strong>Chapter 3: Like Lavender<strong>

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Along the narrow path, Natsuki trekked uphill right behind Mai. Located just a few kilometers away was the Fujino burial ground, where tombs of their ancestors lied. The Fujino family practically owned most parts of Fuuka Island, and the cemetery itself was twice as large as the manor as it included the temple at the top of the hill. From where they were, she could hear distant crashes of waves against the shores. Her mother once took her to the cliff, and she still remembered how terrifying the rocky shores and the angry waves below were. She fainted that day, and her mother never took her there again.

Natsuki wiped the sweat off her forehead. The sun was strong, and the walk seemed further than she expected. "When will we get there?"

Mai chuckled as she turned to look over her shoulder at Natsuki. "Come on. It's not that far away."

"But it's very hot today." Natsuki grumbled. When they were just a child, her friend had visited the sacred ground several times, but Madam Fujino never allowed her to go. Now that she was all grown up, she was surprised that Madam Fujino herself suggested her to visit the place.

Each step deeper into the woods, Natsuki found herself gradually lost in the clouds of thoughts. Many questions passed through her mind without any solid answer to satisfy her. How could she prove Madam Fujino wrong? Why did she end up accepting the task to come search at the cemetery? She wasn't sure if it was pity that brought her here today. She had to admit that she was curious as to what could have made her mother so devoted to Madam and the mission to find the treasure. Could it be faith? Natsuki grimaced. She had never walked the path of faith ever since her mother's death.

"Hey, Mai… I think… I want to go back now—" But Natsuki suddenly stopped in her tracks at the smell of lavender. Her head turned to find the source of the scent. It was the same scent she often smelled at the manor.

Mai frowned. "Oh, please, it's really not that far. We're almost there!"

"Do you smell something… like… lavender…?" Natsuki wrinkled her nose. The closer to the cemetery, the stronger the scent became.

Mai sniffed for a second, and then made a face. "I smelled nothing. Natsuki, you've never changed. You always have that weird, creepy thing about lavender smell."

Natsuki always thought that she had such a good nose, but the lavender smell was something she could never pinpoint where it came from. It followed her like shadows, only she could not see it. At times, it struck her out of the blue, when her thoughts were drifting—her mind absent. But she would catch the smell most strongly whenever she was despairing.

However, after she left Japan, the scent eventually faded, and it rarely happened as she grew older. Natsuki almost forgot about it now, and she was caught off-guard when it greeted her the first day she arrived the manor. She wasn't alarmed by it, but rather peaceful to feel it—sense it again.

"_Lavender… you smell like lavender…"_

Natsuki froze. Her eyes widened, her heart beating fast. The words came out of nowhere, yet they sounded so familiar to her as if they were her own. Somewhere she had said those words to someone she could not remember.

"Natsuki, look! That's the cemetery!" Mai pointed forward.

Natsuki looked up and saw a narrow path leading up to the bamboo gates. Behind the fences were the old temple and a vast field of green. They walked up to the gates and looked around for a sign of anyone. Natsuki noted that the grass had grown tall enough to hide most of the stony, cracked tombs. It looked deserted and uncared for.

"Nobody lives here anymore? It doesn't look like they have been taking care of the cemetery at all," Natsuki frowned in disapproval. It was such disrespect to the Fujino ancestors, and somehow it angered her.

"Madam Fujino has never come up here again since Fujino Aiko died, so a few workers were left in charge."

"Somebody has got to be responsible for it. You can't just leave a cemetery like this. This is a great insult." Natsuki clenched her fists as she swept her gaze around the area.

Mai scratched her head. "Umm, it's always looked like this ever since I can remember."

Natsuki didn't feel the need to knock anymore. She pushed the gates open and marched in. Mai hurried after her friend. They headed towards the temple to look for people.

"Madam Fujino once said that she wanted it to be forgotten. I guess that is why she left it the way it is now."

"She's the one who's never forgotten this place. She sent me here today." Natsuki wiped more sweat off her cheek. Her chest felt heavy with anger, and her body heated by the hot air.

"Oh, what's with you? It's just an old cemetery in the woods. No one really comes here anymore. Why do you care so much?"

At that, Natsuki stopped mid-step. "No—I—I don't care…"

Mai sighed. She came to stand beside her friend and patted her on the shoulder. "I know that you've noticed how the manor has changed, and now seeing the burial ground like this. We all know that the end is near. We can't help but fear for the worst… but things will happen for better, Natsuki." Taking in a deep breath, Mai looked up and around, smiling widely with hope. "Someone will come and take care of the manor, this—this place and the whole island! It will only get better... again…"

Natsuki remained quiet for a moment. Mai seemed to realize how Natsuki felt faster than Natsuki herself. Undeniably, she was afraid that it all would end. She didn't want the only place she shared memories with her mother became only something of the past—abandoned and forgotten.

"What will happen then? Who will take care of the manor after Madam is gone?" Madam Fujino and her husband, Kazuo, were childless, and Natsuki had never seen any relatives visiting the old lady.

Mai sat down upon a large, stony bench, patting her skirt a little. She then took a sip of water from her bottle. "Aiko-sama had a son, Fujino Takeshi. But Ms. Maria said that he wasted his life on drugs and women, and he committed suicide when he was around thirty years old. What a shame."

"Indeed." Natsuki sank down on the same bench, and drank some water from her friend's bottle.

Mai nodded. "We never knew why Takeshi-sama decided to do such a thing. He had an illegitimate daughter with his Italian girlfriend, Marisa Viola. The baby was only one-year-old when the tragedy happened. Ms. Viola then took her daughter back to Italy. Shizuru Viola should be about our age now."

_Shizuru Viola…_

Natsuki squinted up at the falling sakura that poured down upon her by the strong gush of wind. "Never heard of the name."

Mai brushed the sakura off her shoulders and head. "Madam absolutely despises Ms. Viola, but she just adores Shizuru-sama. She used to visit the girl now and then, but not so much in the past three years due to her health problems."

Natsuki gulped more water down to satisfy her thirst. "Why doesn't the girl come instead?"

"I guess Ms. Viola hates Madam back." Mai chortled, but her smile died down soon afterwards. "Madam contacted her several times and asked if Shizuru-sama could come. I hope that Ms. Viola will understand one day. I just feel bad for Madam. She'd love to see her grand-niece again before…"

Natsuki couldn't help but sigh aloud. "But you seemed so confident that _someone_ will come to save this place."

Mai grinned from ear to ear, clinging to Natsuki's arm. "Oh, that's because I believe that you _will_ find the ruby bracelet and save this family from the curse!"

"Oiiii! Stop the nonsense!"

"Here's the catch. I overheard something about the emerald bracelet last year."

"Huh. What about it?"

Mai leaned even closer to her friend. "I think Madam Fujino has been planning to give it to Shizuru-sama. That's why she's growing desperate, fearing that Shizuru-sama would one day fall to the same fate like her ancestors."

Natsuki rolled her eyes. "Madam should just destroy the goddamn bracelet. Problem solved."

"It is the token of eternal love. What could have destroyed it? Even if that insane lady would decide to do it, I will never allow it to happen for as long as I live!"

Both Mai and Natsuki flinched at the interruption. They shot to their feet and turned at the voice coming from behind them. There was a long-haired woman in orange, patterned kimono, holding the bucket of water in both hands. She was standing by the gates, glaring back at the two intruders.


	4. C4: Falling Sakura

**A/N: Thanks all for the reviews. Really appreciate them :D**

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><p><strong>Chapter 4: Falling Sakura<strong>

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::

It was already two o'clock in the morning, but Natsuki still tossed and turned in her bed. The encounter with the tomb guard, Sugiura Midori, this morning left her in the whirlwind. Natsuki and Mai had to flee the cemetery when Midori barged in, splashing water at them.

The seventeen-year-old looking woman claimed to have known her mother, and called both Madam Fujino and Saeko insane women. She seemed to believe that Madam meant to destroy the emerald bracelet, if no one could find the ruby one. Aside from the accusation, which Natsuki thought mad in itself, Midori claimed to know deep history of the Fujino family, and considered Madam only an outsider, who wanted to profit from the connections the Fujino family had had.

_Crazy woman… Shit. This place is full of crazy people…_

Sighing, Natsuki rested the back of her right hand on her forehead. There was just something peculiar about the pair of bracelets. While Madam Fujino seemed miserable and desperate, Mai was so hopeful. Midori was adamant in protecting the bracelets as if she knew that one day the missing one would appear again.

From what Mai had told Natsuki, Midori was a daughter of the old workers, who worked in the Fujino cemetery for decades. Amusingly, tomb guards seemed to pass down from generation to generation as well. They were like the fierce guards to hell's gates, ever so vigilant of any calamity that might have disturbed the field of the dead—the gates to the past. Natsuki wouldn't want to be the troublemaker, of course.

_What the hell…?_

She wrinkled her nose. All of a sudden, the sharp smell of lavender poured into her bedroom and enveloped her. She instantly rose from the bed. It was the first time the smell was just so strong that she couldn't breathe. She walked around her room a bit, trying to find the source of the smell, but like always she was blind to it.

Leaving the room, Natsuki hoped to escape the smell, but she found it to be useless. The odor followed her everywhere, and for a moment she thought that the manor was burning in lavender. Covering her nose, she ran to Mai's room downstairs.

"Mai… Mai, open the door. It's me… Mai, wake up…!"

There was no response, and Natsuki started to cough. The smell began to suffocate her, forcing her to run out the front doors of the manor. She rushed to the driveway, gasping for air.

"Holy… shit…" Natsuki breathed, hands on her knees.

When she could breathe easier, she stood up straight again. However, she froze at the sight of the set of shadowy figure just outside the gates of the manor. Under the pool of down lights, she squinted to get a clearer view at the dark figure. The figure paused, and started to run away.

_Thief!_

Natsuki ran towards the gates, careless if she might be seen in her blue pajamas.

"Natsuki…? Natsuki, where are you going…!" Maria shouted after her. The old woman must have heard Natsuki knocking on Mai's door earlier.

Natsuki didn't wait for Maria. She leapt past the gates, following the thief. It meant grave danger, if someone had been watching the manor at night. The shadowy figure picked up its pace along the graveled path, leading to the cemetery. Natsuki winced as a leaf cut her cheek as she sped through, but she wouldn't slow down.

_Gotcha!_

She jumped at the shadowy figure, caught it, and pushed it down with her to the ground. She lied above the intruder, her head spinning, her heart beating fast from the exertion. They had been lost in the woods, and came closer to the cliff. The clear sound of crashing waves echoing in her ears was the proof. She panted, fear starting to grip her. She didn't like to be around here. Her heart screamed for her to run away, but her grip on the intruder tightened.

She pushed herself up a bit to get a better view of the intruder. Under the moonlight, she recognized the catch as Midori. "What the hell…? What were you doing at the manor!" she barked, chocking the woman.

Midori pushed Natsuki away with all her might and coughed violently. "I… I just… wanted to see what Zhang was doing…"

Natsuki got up to her feet, glaring down at Midori. "I should be the one keeping an eye on you."

Midori laughed, and Natsuki could smell the alcoholic breath from the woman. "I know why you're here. Saeko Kruger failed, and what do you think you can do to help that old woman?"

Natsuki stood still for a moment. "What do you want from us? You better give me a good answer, or I'll throw your ass in jail tonight."

The tomb guard burst into laughter. "Oh, do not underestimate me. You're just like your mother. You think it's just some object to search for, but you don't give your soul to it. You'll never find it," she said, resting her elbows on the ground.

Scoffing, Midori then got up and moved closer to Natsuki. "What would you give to find the truth? Do you really want it…? Do you?"

Natsuki looked away. Images of her mother working late at night with tons of research papers on the desk kept repeating in her head. She recalled the tired smile on her mother's face when she kissed her on the forehead, telling her to go to bed. She recalled many nights she silently cursed the endless search that took away her mother's attention and time from her.

"Yeah, I do… I want the truth…" Natsuki muttered.

"Natsuki…! Natsuki…! Where are you!" Maria's shout came from the distance, but Natsuki stood still, debating whether to respond to it.

When Midori raised both hands towards her, Natsuki instinctively took a step back. Midori rested both hands on Natsuki's chest and smiled. "What—" Before she knew, she was pushed with full force. Her body flying, she found her feet untouched with the ground. When her body fell fast, and the fall showed no sign of stopping, she only realized then how close she was to the cliff.

_No!_

Natsuki squeezed her eyes shut, her arms reaching out. She opened her eyes again and saw that her grip was in the pool of infinitely falling sakura. The leaves poured through her hands and blinded her to all things. She continued to ravage in the emptiness within, which rapidly plagued her whole. The wind was harsh, slapping against her face and body. She tried to scream, but her voice flooded within her throat. The sound of waves crashing against the rocks thundered in her head like a tune. She had heard the familiar melody long before her childhood visit at the cliff, only she could not recall when.

Her body finally hit the angry waves below, and she choked at the pain shooting through her entire body. Her lungs tore at the sharp air she took in. Her body felt like it was tore into pieces, her soul shattered.

_Mom…_

It felt like eternity before the agony gradually subsided. Her breathing became a little steadier, but it still pained her just to breathe. She opened her eyes, and found that the waves became only a sea of sakura. The smell of lavender began to envelop her again, only soother this time around.

_Dead… I must be dead…_

She blinked twice. The view before her was the green grass topped with a thick blanket of sakura. After a while, she felt more at ease, and decided to close her heavy eyelids. When she was about to slip into unconsciousness again, she was pulled back with a slap on her face.

"Ah…" Natsuki groaned. The slapping continued, and she snapped. "Ouch, it hurts!" She sprung up to a sitting position, and found a pale, unfamiliar face just an inch before her.

Natsuki paused. The delicate facial complexion harmonized with the set of deep, brown eyes, which shone in crimson in the bright sunlight. The chestnut tresses were tied back with a white ribbon and hung down slightly below her waist. The stranger was kneeling next to Natsuki, watching her with great curiosity.

Natsuki wrinkled her nose a little at the smell of lavender around them. She was deeply amazed that the girl could be the source of the scent that had haunted her for so long.

_This can't be._

Natsuki eventually got up to her feet. "Who are you? Where am I?" Last thing she remembered was falling off the cliff. However, she had evidently wakened up to a deep forest instead. The trees were larger and the plants were denser than how it was around the cemetery. The wind was cooler, and the air was much lighter.

"This is the island of Fuuka. This is my home." The girl in soiled, yellow kimono explained as she stood up. Her skin was as pale as snow as though she had never been in the sun before. A slight hint of uncertainty resided in her tone. "What are you doing around my mansion? You are not allowed to be here."

"Your—your mansion?" Natsuki's body ached as she looked around to find the graveled path, which she followed last night. "Wow, I—uh… I'm really sorry. I didn't mean to trespass, but I got lost in the woods… Yeah…"

_Man, how did I get here_?

The stranger eyed Natsuki's blue pajamas, and raised her brows in interest.

Natsuki then looked down at her clothes. "Oh, uh... Right. I'm gonna go now. Thanks for not letting the dogs out on me." She turned on her heels and marched away. She needed to get back to the manor now. Mai must be worried sick that she had disappeared without a word.

"Where are you going? Where are you from?" the girl asked, following Natsuki.

"Shizuru-sama! Shizu… Shizuru-sama…! Wait for me…!"

At the shout, Natsuki turned to where the voice came. A redhead in a brown kimono was rushing towards them. Natsuki inwardly sighed in relief to see that it was actually Midori. The chase along the cliff last night really was just a dream after all. Seeing Midori here, she was relieved that she was still near Fujino manor.

"Thank heaven! I thought you went to the market without telling anyone again! You'd get me into trouble!" Midori panted, stopping in front of Natsuki and the girl.

The girl chortled. "When will you stop worrying? I can take care of myself. And I know a lot of people at the market. They will not do me any harm."

Natsuki then took a brief glance at the stranger, and was struck by her warm smile. The kind of smile that was full of innocence and youth like a breeze of springtime. The kind of smile Natsuki had long forgotten how to wear it on her lips. For some reason, the girl's smile was highly contagious, and Natsuki found herself smiling. "Shizuru, is it…?" She muttered before she could stop herself.

The girl turned and grinned. "Yes, my name is Fujino Shizuru. You have not told me your name."

_Fujino…?_

Natsuki blinked a few times. "What are you to Madam Fujino? I have never seen you around."

Shizuru raised her brows in confusion. "Ma—Madam?"

Midori quickly stepped in front of the girl, both arms spreading out in protection. "Stranger! You have invaded Fujino mansion! Tell me your name, or I will be forced to call upon the guards!"

Natsuki frowned. "Hey, it's me. I'm Tokiha Mai's friend. We met yesterday—"

"Do not try to trick me!" Midori then turned to shout, "Guards! There's an intruder! Guards!"

Natsuki had to sigh in irony. Midori was the intruder last night, but she became one today.

"I am certain that she does not mean any harm. Midori, please, stop it." Shizuru slightly pulled the older woman's arm.

Midori glowered at Natsuki, but her voice became softer at the girl's plea. "Is she one of your _strange_ friends from the village?"

Natsuki found it greatly amusing that, not only Midori could not recognize her, but was treating Shizuru like a treasure. They seemed like a family. Did they actually live in the cemetery?

_Oh, God, they're so weird…_

"Ah… Yes… Yes, she is…" Shizuru coughed.

Midori sharply turned to Shizuru, a hand over the girl's forehead. "Are you ill again? A cold? Fever? I told you not to come out and play for too long! Winter is near."

"I am fine," Shizuru said, laughing heartily, "And the weather is just nice. Don't worry too much."

Midori reluctantly nodded. "All right. But next time you want to go out, you have to tell me first. If you get ill again, your father will punish me."

Before Natsuki could inspect them any further, the guards appeared from the distance. Six men in navy kimono suits were dashing towards them, drawn swords in their hands. Their eyes were upon her, their face grim and determined.

Natsuki immediately took a few steps back, and she suddenly missed her guns. If only she had them at the moment, the men would not post a treat to her at all. "I—I need to go… now…"

Shizuru turned to her. "Wait—No, please, don't—"

Natsuki didn't waste her time waiting for the girl to finish her words. She started running the other way, sprinting down the slippery hill.

"You have not told me your name yet!"

Natsuki could hear the distant shout, but she didn't look back. Her feet took their own life, and she ran as fast as she could into the deep woods.


	5. C5: A Butterfly

**Chapter 5: A Butterfly**

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Natsuki could neither feel her breath, nor her feet as though she was dashing through the clouds. Sweeping through the thick, deep forest like a wolf roaming in the wild, she could outrun anyone—anything. She was born that way. Her instinct had made her who she was today.

When she reached the bottom of the hill, she gradually slowed down. She couldn't hear the rustling footsteps behind her now, and was fairly certain that the men in samurai clothes had lost her tracks. Exhaustion then started to sink. Her knees buckled, and she leaned against a thick tree, her breathing ragged.

She looked ahead, and her mind boggled with the view of villagers in plain kimonos passing by. The village was swamped with a crowd of merchants, children playing, poets and street musicians. Houses and buildings were all made of wood, and the roads were graveled. Some privileged persons traveled by carriages, or horses. People carried about their businesses as if it was their way of life.

Breathless, she watched them and took in all the startling information. She wakened up today and found herself in an ancient town. She would have imagined that she was in some kind of festival. If not for the rough touch of the trunk against her palm—if not for the cut on her cheek by a sharp leaf, received when she followed Midori into the woods last night, she would have thought that she was dreaming. For the very reason, she felt awkward in her blue pajamas. Now, she had no doubt why the chestnut-haired girl looked at her in such a way. Everyone here would have deemed her as 'peculiar'.

She frowned as she recalled those men in navy kimonos, carrying awesome, shiny swords like samurais in movies. She shook her head at their barbaric treatment.

_Calling the police would have been more civilized!_

She then grimaced for a moment. She seemed to have eluded the men, but the encounter with the lavender girl still troubled her. The moment the girl chose to appear was just opportune, solving the riddle of the scent which had haunted her for years. The smile—the serenity on the pale face was still vivid in her mind that she could see it so clearly whenever she closed her eyes.

_Fujino Shizuru… What is she to Madam Fujino? Maybe they know each other… But why did Madam leave her in the woods with some cemetery guard?_

Natsuki was sure that Midori was guarding the cemetery alone, and not a person like she did today. The fact that Midori didn't recognize her at all puzzled her.

_I need to go home now. Everything will be answered once I get back to the manor._

She got up to her feet, but halted at the loud cries of her stomach. She clutched her stomach, and warily looked around for a noodles stand. She spotted one from the distance and stalked across the crowd towards it. Only when she realized that she had no money, she inwardly sighed, her hand on her tummy.

_I'm screwed… Urgh, Mai, come and get me out of here!_

She turned away from the noodles place, but stopped when a familiar voice rang distantly in her ears.

'_Natsuki, where did you go…?'_

Natsuki spun on her heels, looking around in bewilderment. It was Mai's voice, but she couldn't seem to locate where it came from. There were only carriages, and no sign of taxi or train in sight. Stalking through the small town, she tried to look for a familiar sign of public transportation. She even tried to talk to some villagers, but they all looked at her with suspicious eyes and turned away.

When the sun began to set, fatigue finally took over. Natsuki decided to give herself a rest and took a corner beside a cottage some distance away from the market. Her shoulders dropped. She sank to the ground and hugged herself. Lying down, she closed her eyes and prayed.

_This is just a bad, bad dream… A nightmare…_

Her mind soon drifted away into the warmth of her bedroom. The smell of hot food in the manor eventually found her. It felt so real—so near. She felt at home, and she knew that she would wake up to see familiar faces again.

"Are you all right…? Stranger… Are you all right?"

Natsuki heard the voice ringing beside her ear, and she fuddled. She had heard it before, the same concern in the voice, but she couldn't tell when. Slowly, she opened her eyes. The air was cold, and countless stars adorned the night sky. She couldn't remember the last time she saw this many stars before. They were so bright, and she feared them falling upon her.

But she was met with a disappointment. Instead of seeing Mai, it was Shizuru kneeling beside her. The girl found her once again.

Shivering, Natsuki rubbed her arms, her breath foggy. Tired and hungry, she wasn't sure if she could outrun the samurai lookalikes this time. Luckily, there was no sign of the samurais, only Midori growling behind Shizuru. A few men in dark kimonos and black hats were standing around a carriage not so far away, watching them. They were presumably Shizuru's guards. Their look perfectly fit the Heian period, and Natsuki already considered them all insane.

_Yeah, the whole freakin' village is crazy …_

"What do you want?" Natsuki sat up. She walled in a breath, readied herself for another run.

Shizuru sat back, hands on her knees. Contrary to her fragile look, she didn't seem to mind the soil and dirt. Her gaze fixed upon Natsuki. "I hope you won't run away from me again. I didn't mean to scare you," she said with a small smile.

The sincerity Natsuki saw somehow loosened her up. She rubbed her face to clear her head. "I… I'm tired. I really want to go home. Could you be so kind and call me a cab?"

Shizuru paused for a moment, and then chortled. "You are so strange."

Natsuki bit her bottom lip. On an ordinary day, she would have jumped at the girl and knocked some sense into her, but she had no room for arrogance now. "Look, I'm serious. I don't have money on me at the moment, but I'll pay you back when I get home. I live at the Fujino manor—"

"Stop lying, intruder!" Midori came to stand next to her master, looking down at Natsuki. "The whole of Fuuka Island belongs to Lord Fujino Masaru, and Shizuru-sama is his daughter. You have shown disrespect and defiance ever since we met in the morning! If you do not behave, I will—"

"It is all right, Midori. She is lost, and she does not know who I am," Shizuru said, rising up to her feet. She then extended a hand to Natsuki. "It is impossible to stay out here in the night. I invite you to spend a night at my mansion, and we will send you back home in the morning… wherever it is."

Natsuki let out a sigh. She slowly nodded, and took Shizuru's hand. At the touch of the delicate skin, she had to wonder if the girl ever lifted anything heavier than a pen. Standing up, she watched the smile on the girl's face, suspecting if her kindness harbored an agenda.

Shizuru let go off Natsuki's hand, and led them to the carriage. Her glide was ever so graceful, slow and steady, her head high. With such manners, she would have fooled anyone, including Natsuki, that she belonged to another world altogether. Once they entered the carriage, Midori and the men then led them out of the town.

Leaning back against the thin wall of the carriage, Natsuki felt uneasy at the girl's attentive eyes. She pulled her collar closer against the cold air. Brushing her nose, she looked out the gaps between the curtains, trying to ignore the gaze.

"What is your name?"

At the question, Natsuki glanced at the girl. "Natsuki Kruger."

"Pardon?"

"Kruger. I'm half German, half Japanese."

Shizuru raised her brows.

"Well… my dad is German."

A slight confusion settled on Shizuru's face as she looked down.

"Germany, you know." Natsuki let out an annoyed sigh, shifting in her position as the carriage shook along the graveled road.

Shizuru looked up at her, and smiled. "Is that where you are from?"

"Sort of. But I was born in Japan though."

It took a moment before Shizuru spoke again. "Natsuki…? Are you Kuga Natsuki?"

"I said, 'Kruger'. Jeez, girl, you're so weird—" Natsuki stopped midsentence when Shizuru fished out a thin notebook from behind the several layers of her traditional clothing, and handed it to her.

Natsuki reluctantly reached out and took it. The notebook was yellow and crumpled. It appeared so old that she was afraid that it might deteriorate into pieces at her touch. "What's this?" She started to flip to the first page. Without much thought, she read it aloud. "My name is Natsuki Kruger, and I have no idea how I have gotten here. It has been a month since I have stayed in the mansion, and…" Her voice eventually trailed off. When the meaning of those words registered, she looked up at Shizuru. She gripped the notebook tighter than she would have liked.

"So you do understand it. Some of the words, I cannot understand. You do have the same name with the writer… if—if you would read further into the book…" Shizuru glanced away for a brief moment, holding up a colorful fan to veil her lovely lips. "When I first saw you in the woods this morning, I did not think of this book at all, but somehow you just reminded me of it. The circumstance is incredibly strange… I found this notebook several years ago in my own mansion, but I still cannot find who it belongs to. It seems to be an old writing by a foreigner. I was hoping that you might be able to tell me what the writer wrote about."

For a moment, Natsuki narrowed her eyes, contemplating. She lowered her hands to her knees, clutching the notebook in one hand.

_Liars. They knew who I am._

Without warning, Natsuki leaped at the girl, choking her with both hands. "Who are you people! Where are you taking me!"

Shizuru's face reddened as she tried to push Natsuki away. "Let… Let go…" she breathed.

To Natsuki's surprise, the girl flipped, and now straddled her instead. It proved to be a mistake to judge her by her flimsy body and fancy clothes. The girl actually knew how to fight. Both wrists locked over her head by Shizuru's firm grip, Natsuki looked up at her captor. Midori might be right that the girl had some health problems, only she wasn't that easy to be put down.

Shizuru's lips parted as she tried to get more air into her lungs. "Why did you… attack me? I was only… only hoping that—"

"Shizuru-sama!" Midori shouted, sharply pulling the mat curtain up. The servant must have noted the ruckus inside the carriage. "What did you do to Shizuru-sama! Do not touch her, commoner!"

While Shizuru was taken aback at the interruption, Natsuki pushed the girl off her, snatched the notebook, and leaped out of the carriage. Midori ran after her, yelling for the men to guard Shizuru. Soon, Natsuki knew by the wind, which was becoming harsher that they have come nearer to the cliff. She involuntarily slowed down. They had come along the path near the cliff in order to get back to the mansion. Where could she go from here?

"That's it!" Midori bounded at Natsuki and tackled her to the ground.

Natsuki yelped at the impact as she fell hard onto the ground. The notebook flew out of her grasp like a butterfly, and disappeared beyond the edge of the cliff. Natsuki's jaw dropped. Her hope to find any clue about her captives was diminished.

"I knew it was a mistake to take you along with us! Shizuru-sama was just too kind!"

Midori continued to yell, but her words hardly registered in Natsuki's mind. Natsuki turned to see the vacant look on Shizuru's face. The girl had followed them, the men closely behind her. Standing still, she had not uttered a word, but kept staring at where the notebook had fallen.

As if time had stopped right then, Natsuki couldn't seem to tear her gaze away from the forlorn look in the crimson gaze. The notebook must have been something dear to Shizuru. For some reason, the understated pain in those eyes looked so familiar to Natsuki, but she still couldn't tell when she had seen it before.

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><p><strong>AN:** Thank you for all the encouragement! I hope that my chapters will eventually answer all your questions. Most importantly, I'm not an expert in Japanese history, and it's why I was reluctant about writing this story for years... I have to apologize now for the mistakes I will make about Heian period in this story. There will be historical inaccuracy in this story. You are warned.


	6. C6: An Empty Page

**A/N: **First of all, thank you for the encouragement. Second… Wow, I've heard something negative about 'time travel' since my college days. My teachers weren't thrilled about it. So thank you for warning me about it again here. I never used this plot device, and I never really read anything about time travel (only in some movies, I guess). If you could give me examples of good or bad stories in this genre, pls send me a link. Other than that… Pls don't put faith in this story. I can't guarantee how it will go. I'm afraid that it might disappoint you XD

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><p><strong>Chapter 6: An Empty Page<strong>

A lone candle stood on the red stand in the corner of the square room, allowing only murky view in this confined space. Aside from the day her mother died, this had to be the darkest night Natsuki had known.

Hugging her knees, she took the opposite corner, wrapped in a white blanket. The darker it got, the safer she felt. It must have been hours since she was brought back to the mansion. They let her bathe in warm water and gave her new clothes. Although she was exhausted, she couldn't bring herself to sleep. The events happened today left her in the whirlwind. She didn't know where to begin, or what to believe. Perhaps, it was some kind of misunderstanding. She was neither wealthy, nor powerful. There was no reason anyone would want to kidnap her.

Staring at the dancing flame, she kept telling herself to focus, but her mind kept wandering off to Midori's sudden amnesia, the villagers in the ancient town, the carriages and the samurais, and the noble girl with the mysterious notebook.

_Get a grip, Natsuki! There must be a reason to explain all this… a reason…_

She bit her bottom lip, resting her shin over her crossed arms. She had always been the master of her own heart and mind, but she couldn't help it. Her body trembled, and tears began to well up her eyes. Either she was lost in a mad world, or she had really gone mad.

_Dad… _

She pulled the blanket up, wiping her tears with it. She couldn't imagine how worried her father must be when he heard from Mai of her disappearance. Although she had been rebellious at times, she never let her father worry, knowing that they had only each other since her mother passed. Her father would never understand. Mai would never have imagined where she was. No one would believe her. At the moment, she wasn't sure which was better between being dead or alive.

"Kurujer… Kurujer…"

At the voice, Natsuki brushed her reddened nose a little, and looked through the mat screen, which separated her room from the joint passage. A set of shadow was sitting on the other side of the screen just out on the wooden pathway. It was Midori.

Natsuki crawled towards the screen and lifted it up. Midori was in a charcoal-colored kimono, her hair pulled back into a long ponytail.

"Are you here to kill me?" Natsuki huskily whispered.

"Nonsense. Although it is a good idea."

Glaring back, Natsuki clutched the edge of the screen.

"I cannot fathom why Shizuru-sama provided you shelter. You are certainly unworthy of it." Midori perked her chin up. "But I am not here to lament of my master's kindness. I am here to inform you that there will be a horse waiting for you at dawn. You are to leave as you wish." At that, she got up and turned away.

Natsuki quickly crawled out of her room. "You guys are letting me go? Just like that?" After what she had done to the noble girl, she was deeply surprised that she was unpunished, but also given shelter for the night. These people seemed saner than she would have liked.

Midori turned to glare down at the kneeling Natsuki. She took a few steps closer, and Natsuki reluctantly crawled backward. "I have spent most of my energy to restrain myself from decapitating you for choking and bruising my master. You better leave when you still have the chance."

Natsuki found it hard to believe the thought that was crossing her mind now. She looked up and said, "How do I get back? I—I don't even know where I am… I live at the Fujino manor, but no one believed me."

After a moment, Midori knelt down in front of Natsuki, lifting her chin up, so that their gazes could meet. "This is the one and only Fujino mansion. Do not test my tolerance. It does not come in abundance."

"We met yesterday, Midori-san. Don't you remember me? I swear we met at the cemetery!" Natsuki held her breath, secretly dreading the answer she would receive.

Laughing, Midori drew her hand back and stood up. She then walked away, waving in dismissal. "I have not been to the sacred ground for months. Try to get some sleep. I truly hope to see your room empty by dawn. Buddha blesses us."

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><p>The sun was high on the sky, and the air was cool with soft wind. Natsuki stood next to a black horse, which was tied to the tree in the woods west of the mansion. She looked around in frustration. The heavy, green leaves and thick trees seemed larger than life, and for the first time, she felt small.<p>

There were no street signs, convenient stores, sneakers, bubblegum, cellphones, cars or concrete roads. The people she saw dressed as though they were in period movies. She didn't sleep at all last night, and she didn't think she could ever fall asleep again. Something very bizarre had happened to her, and it felt so real that she feared for her sanity.

"It is almost noon, and I see that you are still here."

Natsuki flinched at the voice. She turned to see Midori, leading a small caravan. The woman looked displeased, of course. There were eight men on horses this time. Two of them guarded each side of the carriage, the rest following behind. Although the screens were rolled down, Natsuki could safely assume that Shizuru was inside the vehicle.

Natsuki strode towards the carriage. "Hey! I need to talk to you!" she shouted, hoping the girl could hear her.

"Stay away, I warn you!" Midori instantly blocked Natsuki before she could lift the screen of the carriage.

Natsuki struggled with Midori, trying to come closer. All the while, she shouted past Midori's shoulder. "I… I need to ask you something about the notebook…! I—I want to know what happened next. What did she do? That woman, Kuga Natsuki. Did she ever leave…? Tell me how she left this place…!"

The moment the words slipped through her lips, she couldn't even believe herself that she was asking these questions. The very thought itself seemed absolutely absurd to her, but one could always surprise oneself in time of desperation.

Then there was a long silence, long enough that both Natsuki and Midori stopped pushing and pulling each another. Natsuki's ears pricked up slightly when she caught the rustling sounds inside the carriage.

"I found the writer's name and yours to be a remarkable coincidence, but I am surprised that you seem to really think that you are the person from the notebook. How is that possible?" Shizuru's melodic, calm voice slipped through the screen.

Natsuki inwardly growled. Last thing she wanted right now was some girl from a millennium ago lecturing her about logic. If she would be called 'crazy' today, she would accept it. If it could take her home, she'd do anything.

"I just… I want to know how it ends…" Natsuki tried to steady her voice, and not lashing out.

"You lost my notebook to the sea below. Retrieve it, and you will find out."

At the reply, Natsuki clenched her fists as she mentally shot all the samurais dead and burnt the carriage down. Taking in a few deep breaths, she looked up at the carriage again and forced out a wide smile.

_Smile. Smile. Smile._

"I must apologize for my rash conduct, my—err—my lady. I am truly sorry for hurting you and losing your belonging, and I am eternally grateful for your kindness, providing me shelter last night."

Giggles rang faintly from inside the carriage, and Natsuki tensed up at once. "Why are you laughing?"

"You would not think of apologizing until you wanted something from me."

"I _would_. I just forgot," Natsuki said through her gritted teeth. The girl was getting on her nerves. Definitely.

"I am mystified. Why does the notebook suddenly seem so important to you? You could not have been the writer, could you?"

"You're right. Forget it." Natsuki spun on her heels and stalked back towards the black horse. She knew that she absolutely sounded crazy (even to some kimono-dressed people), and she should shut up and tried to get back to the main road somehow.

_Shit… I never rode a horse before. _

Natsuki made a face as she clumsily climbed onto the back of the horse. She missed her black, shiny Ducati all of a sudden. But she would take the horse with her just in case she could sell it for some cash to get home.

"Oiiiiii!" Natsuki yelped. At the sound of whistle, the horse immediately jogged towards the carriage. "Ohhhhhhhhh, s—s—slow down! Horse! Slow… down…!" She found herself blushing when the horse stopped next to the window of the carriage. She could catch Shizuru's shadow moving closer to the screen, but she couldn't see the face. Involuntarily, Natsuki bent lower, so that she could get closer to the screen as well.

"Allow me to advise you, Kruger-san. Life is but an empty page. No one could write the story but you." Shizuru chortled, and moved away from the window. "I am going to the Capital for a few days. If you would like to stay at my mansion, you are welcomed to do so. If not…, farewell."

The carriage subsequently began to move away. The samurais on horses followed, but Midori stayed behind.

Natsuki watched until the small caravan disappeared behind the green hill. She turned to Midori. "Why don't you go with her?"

"I am trusted to take care of the mansion, while Shizuru-sama is away."

"What business she has in Tokyo?"

Midori let out an irritated sigh. "Kyoto. Honestly, are you not Japanese? Where are you from?"

Natsuki shrugged. "The one and only Fujino mansion."

Midori glared up at the reply. "I am going to kill you."

"Really? I'm officially your master's guest now."

Midori's jaw dropped. "Oh, no. No. No! You said that you'd leave!"

"Make me." Natsuki rolled her eyes. It amused her somehow that even though Midori couldn't remember her, but the woman's dislike of her still remained.

"Do not challenge me!" Midori slapped the horse in the rear, causing it to sprint ahead.

"Whoa—h—hey…!" Natsuki tried to rein in the horse, but it didn't seem to listen to her and galloped deeper into the woods.

Eventually, the horse stopped in the middle of the forest, and all Natsuki could see was greenness. She panted, looking around. Midori was nowhere to be seen. She wasn't sure how far she had come away from the mansion.

_Damn you, Midori! You'll meet the real Natsuki Kruger, I swear to God! You're asking for it!_

However, she suddenly spotted a man in light green kimono coming out from behind the large tree. She had to stop and took a deep breath in. The man looked so pale in the strong sun. He raised his brows in bewilderment upon seeing her, but quickly composed himself, raising his folded fan to his lips.

"Mori…" he mumbled.

'Mori' must have been the horse's name, but it wasn't what caught Natsuki's attention. She decided that he couldn't have been older than seventeen or eighteen. What amazed her was his remarkable resemblance to Shizuru; the color of their hair, the dark, angry shade of their brown eyes, their straight noses, and the perfect shape of their cheekbones and chins. Notably, they were of the same height. While Shizuru was considered slim, he was even thinner. They both looked virtually like twins.

"I… I got the horse from Fujino Shizuru… Umm…" Natsuki muttered.

Upon hearing it, his ashen face shone in a bright smile—a smile without restrain, a smile brighter than Shizuru's. "She is my younger sister. Are you one of her eccentric friends?"

Natsuki's raised a brow. "Your sister, huh?"

He cleared his throat, his smile intact. "Let me introduce myself. My name is Fujino Eiji, the only son of Lord Fujino Masaru. What is your name?"

Natsuki froze, her hands clutching the leather rein.

_E—Eiji…_

She recalled well of the myth about the pair of bracelets, the one which was missing since the ancient time. It was said that it was Fujino Eiji, who gave the ruby bracelet to his secret lover instead of his fiancée, resulting in a thousand years curse through the family history.

_You gotta be kidding me… I'm truly fucked in the head, aren't I…?_


	7. C7: Fate

**A/N:** Sorry about the wait. Got some work coming in :)

Thank you for all the encouragement. Don't worry, guys. I wasn't discouraged or anything. In fact, I was glad that people warned me about time travel theme. It helped me to be more careful ^_^ It's just that you'll never hear me guarantee you anything about reading my stories. It's just meh. Now, on with the story.

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><p><strong>Chapter 7: Fate<strong>

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**::**

Lying flat on her back, Natsuki looked around the small quarter. Her gaze darted all over the place, unable to focus. The raindrops falling over the roof sent her mind whirling in the mess of recent information she had learned.

She had lost in the woods earlier today and run into someone named, 'Fujino Eiji'. Soon after, several servants appeared and, worried as they looked, promptly took him away. Luckily, Midori had found her and led her and Mori back to the mansion, although the woman refused to answer any of Natsuki's questions regarding both Eiji and Shizuru. Midori was indisputably loyal to her master.

_How could this be? He couldn't have been _the_ Fujino Eiji from the myth… _

Natsuki didn't particularly enjoy the idea of her somehow slip through time and space, landing a thousand years back into history. She didn't want to believe it. She just couldn't believe it. Admitting it would officially make her eligible for an insane asylum. The best she could do at the moment was to think that she was so obsessed with the pair of bracelets, just like her mother, so much so that she started dreaming about all of this.

Natsuki pinched her cheek real hard. "Oiiiiiii…!" Frowning, she wiped the tears from her eyes. "Damn it." Cursing, she knew that she wasn't dreaming, and she felt like she was about to burst out more tears at all the worries and fears crushing in her heart. What she found herself in was just too much to take.

At the sound of giggle, Natsuki instantly sat up. "Who's there!"

At the doorway, Eiji was sitting on the other side of the screen. He was sitting on his heels, a folded fan in his right hand. "Have you found the room comfortable?"

Natsuki strode out, lifting the curtain between them up. She looked up at the gray sky and gestured for him to come in. "What are you doing here? Come on in. You'll get wet sitting there."

"Ah, thank you. You are so kind." Eiji moved just a bit closer, just enough that the rain wouldn't reach him, but refused to come into her room. "I heard from Midori that you are Shizuru's visitor. If you do not mind, I would like to keep you company, while my sister is away."

Natsuki eyed him up and down, and decided that he appeared harmless enough. She looked around, and when it was certain that his servants were nowhere near, she sat down in front of him and stared straight at him. His eyes looked so similar to Shizuru's, except that the girl's shade was a touch darker. There was just something mysterious about Shizuru's gaze, whist Eiji's was brighter—with faith—with hope. The girl's lips were also fuller, but one wouldn't have noticed their differences if one hadn't been scrutinizing their faces pointblank.

Only until Eiji cleared his throat, Natsuki snapped out of her trance. She blushed and tore her gaze away from him. It amused her that she seemed to recall details of the strange girl's facial features than she would have expected.

"Have you found something interesting?" he joked.

"As a matter of fact, I do. You look so much like your sister. It's scary."

He laughed heartily. "Yes, so much so that I wish to be her."

"Huh. You wanna be a girl?"

Eiji shook his head, his smile intact. "Everyone wants to be her. Even my parents see her as perfection. I am sure that you feel the same way for you are her friend."

"Oh…uh, yeah, I guess—of course." Natsuki muttered. She couldn't imagine what Eiji would do, if he knew that she was just a trespasser instead of his sister's honorable guest. "Hey, uh… I need a favor from you. Can you help me with something?"

"Anything."

"Is there a bus, or—a—a train around here? I need something that isn't a horse, you know." She lightly punched at his shoulder. "Have you got any money?"

He slightly recoiled at her touch, briefly glancing the other way. "A—a bussu? I do not know what it is, but if you want, I could have Midori teach you how to ride a horse, Koorujer-san."

"It's Kruger." Natsuki inwardly cursed. It must be Midori teaching him how to pronounce her name like that.

"Ku—ruu—ee—"

"_Kruger_."

Grinning, he tapped the tip of his folded fan at the wooden floor. "How about 'Kuga'? That should be easier for us."

Natsuki sighed in annoyance. "Okay. Forget about the name. I need your help. I want to… I…" She suddenly looked down at the floor for a moment. "I want to go home."

Eiji then became quiet, his gaze wandering elsewhere. "I am sorry, Kuruger-san, that you are unhappy here, but… Midori might be able to help you with that… I cannot leave this place."

Natsuki watched him attentively. "Your sister locked you up, didn't she? I knew it!" She shot up to her feet, clenching her fists. There was something peculiar about the chestnut-haired girl. Perhaps, this whole island had been turned into her sadistic playground of the ultimate nightmare.

Eiji looked away all the while. "It is my father. He does not allow me to leave the island, fearing for my health. I do not get to meet people that much, least leaving the mansion."

Natsuki stopped. "Are… Are you two ill?"

Eiji chuckled. "Shizuru is much healthier than me, although my condition has my parents worry over both of us. She is their only hope, I suppose."

Natsuki eventually sat down again, her heart heavy at the despair in his voice. He seemed as sane as everyone else in this place, whereas she was the only insane one around here. Someday, she might earn all the explanations she searched for. Someday, she might find the reason she was sent here. Fate might just be 'it', if she could bring herself to believe in it.

_Fate…?_

"Do you… I mean…" Natsuki paused to take a deep breath in. She needed all the strength she had to admit the reality she was in. After a moment of silence, she looked up at him again. "If you are the first son of the Fujino family, it'd mean that you possess the pair of bracelets?"

Eiji's eyes widened at the remark. "Yes. Might I ask how you knew about this? It seems rather strange for a foreigner like you to know about this."

Natsuki cleared her throat. "Oh, umm—people talked, and—I overheard them."

"My father will pass me the bracelets when the time is right. I have never seen the bracelets myself, but I am determined to give it to my future wife, since it is our tradition." Eiji smiled, holding his fan up to his lips. "I am already eighteen, and my parents are displeased that I would not marry any girls they had found for me. I will do it my way, of course. She does not have to be of noble families. She can be anyone, but I have to be able to connect with her."

"That sounds like the sanest thing I've heard since I got here," Natsuki rambled, her chin rested on her palm. "But I doubt your parents would allow you to just marry anyone like that. Besides, you don't get to go out much. How are you gonna find your future wife?"

"I believe in fate. Fate will bring us together," he said, grinning.

"Now, that sounds crazy."

Eiji laughed. "Do not tell anyone, but I cannot wait to give the bracelet to her, whoever she will be."

This time, the raven-haired woman looked away and, after a moment passed all that came out of her was a tired sigh. "I just hope it'll be the right one…"

Perhaps, if he would, she would not be here in the first place.

* * *

><p>Everyday Natsuki woke up in hope to find Mai knocking on her bedroom's door, ready with a hot breakfast on the tray. Everyday she woke up to find disappointment. It had been two weeks since Shizuru was gone, and there were many things Natsuki would like to ask. Her patience was running out, and she wasn't sure how long she could wait for the girl. It could be months. It could be forever.<p>

Eiji proved to be _the_ one, thus making everything else in this world as real as it could be. This very reason only accounted more for Natsuki to want to know more about the old notebook. If Shizuru would tell her what was written in it, she might be able to find her way home, or at the worst scenario, she would know her 'future' in this place. Now, it was safe to conclude that 'Natsuki Kruger' had visited this place a thousand years ago.

After several hours of wandering downhill in the thick woods, Natsuki decided to take a rest. Eiji had accompanied her earlier in the afternoon before he was asked to get back to the mansion, reluctantly leaving her to trek further alone. Sometimes she couldn't help but feel sorry for the man. He was eighteen, but his life was so restricted with pain and loneliness. Perhaps, the idea of 'fate' was his only cure, the only thing keeping him alive.

The sun was setting, and the sky turned orange. Natsuki sat down along the slope, resting her chin on her palms and looking out into the green wilderness. It strangely calmed her down. Then the thought of her mother eventually came across her mind. What would her mother say now? Would it excite her mother, or would it scare her? Would her mother want to be here with her to find all the answers she searched for her entire life? Natsuki could only imagine if her mother was here with her.

Before her thoughts could drift further away, the sounds of crashing waves began to register in her mind and became louder each second past. She sat up straight, her hands lowered to her knees. The sea must be nearer than she thought. Even though she hated being near the water, she couldn't refuse the thought of a ferry taking her away from here. She decided that she could not wait any longer. She needed to take life into her own hand and leave this island.

She got up to her feet and followed the sound like she had never done before. She had to close her eyes to catch where it came from. Cool wind caressed her cheeks as she turned. Thick leaves brushed her skin as she strutted through. Fear crawled along her skin, but her heart marched on.

Closer and closer, she found herself at the edge of the cliff, looking down to the sea only eighty meters below. There were large rocks standing strong against the waves. At the sight, Natsuki shut her eyes, biting her bottom lip hard. She couldn't help but hug herself. Her skin tore. Her bones shattered. Her heart broke. It felt so strange that she knew all those feelings just by looking down at it. She couldn't feel her legs now, but she knew she must go on.

She forced her eyes open again. Not too far away from the rocky shore, a long, wooden bridge led into the sea. A group of men stepped out of a boat and walked along the dock, approaching the shore. They were surrounded by merchants and villagers.

_Boats. Passengers…. Ohhh, I can't believe my luck today! _

Natsuki's face beamed in delight. Today was the first time she had walked several miles from the mansion, and inadvertently found the dock. She didn't have any money on her at the moment, but she could surely beg (or threaten) for a ride. She then raced down the hill towards the shore, her feet as light as a feather.

"Wait! I need a ride…! Wait!" Natsuki shouted, waving her arms high in the air. She leapt from one rock to another until she reached the soft, sandy ground. She dashed upon the golden sand of twilight, her heart flying with hope.

When she finally reached the dock, she ran towards the boat. Panting, she couldn't help but smile widely. At the moment, she didn't feel like she needed the air in her lungs. She could fly, only if the glare from the men before her didn't pull her down to earth.

The men had paused in their tracks, turning their attention from the surrounding villagers to her. The young master stood before his eight samurais. However, they all looked rather familiar when she got closer to them, and their focus froze her.

Natsuki raised one hand over her brows to block the twilight sun that was stabbing into her eyes. Squinting, she recognized the face of the master before her. "Eiji… no…" She frowned in confusion. "Shizuru…?"

Dressed in a deep violet garment, with a high, black hat on her head, Shizuru stared at her with a blank expression her face. At the moment, the girl perfectly passed as her brother, only more graceful and robust—more menacing, if one would say. Shizuru didn't seem to hear the giggles from the village girls around her, or pay attention to their admiring smiles for her.

In long silence, Shizuru just stared at Natsuki, her gaze as cold as ice. Natsuki couldn't tell if Shizuru was pleased or displeased to see her, whether the girl still welcomed her as a guest or not. There was neither a smile to greet Natsuki, nor warm gesture as expected from Shizuru. It was as though they had never met before. In the light of twilight, Shizuru's face appeared even paler than her brother's. Something had ignited fear in the crimson gaze.

Shizuru then turned ever so slightly to the men behind her. "She does not leave the island." With that, Shizuru walked past the raven-haired woman and the group of village girls, leaving the dock without looking back.


	8. C8: Nightfall

**A/N: **I'm sorry for not elaborating about the costumes of the Heian era. If you would google 'kariginu', you'll see what I meant about the black hat (and how Shizuru was supposed to dress in the last chapter). But I assume that we all are acquainted with female kimonos, so I'll leave it at that :) I won't go about describing every color of the layer of their clothes… +_+

I'll be gone for at least a week or two due to workload, so I'm cranking this chapter up just in case. Thanks for all the encouragement :D

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><p><strong>Chapter 8: Nightfall<strong>

Stars had begun to fill the night sky, and the wind was getting cooler each minute. In the dark, Natsuki sneaked through the bushes, heading towards the west wing of the mansion. Eiji had shown her around before, and while he resided in the east wing, his sister took the west. Natsuki's room was in the south wing along with the maids.

Candles were lit, brightening the largest room of the west wing. The screens were rolled down, lending Natsuki some vague view of the figures inside. There were about four maids, scampering about, holding stacks of folded clothes and whatnot. From the distance, Natsuki couldn't quite make out what they were saying, but their tone was apparent of concern and worry.

It had been a little over an hour since Natsuki saw Shizuru at the dock. Realizing that the girl wouldn't come to her with an explanation, Natsuki decided to seek an answer herself. She had waited for the sun to completely set and took the first opportunity to leave her quarter unnoticed.

Moving closer, Natsuki came to hide behind the bushes near the raised passageway just outside Shizuru's room. She lowered her head just enough for her eyes to observe what was going on inside.

Shizuru had apparently changed into a silky, creamy-colored kimono. She was sitting on her heels, her back facing Natsuki's way. Natsuki took note of Shizuru's hair, which was hung down to her waist, unlike other noble girls who had grown theirs to floor length. Then her gaze fell upon the black hat on the floor.

_That's the reason, I guess…_

The maids were moving about the room, collecting some bloodied fabric, the black hat, and the violet kariginu, the garment which Shizuru had worn when she returned today.

_Huh, so they all knew about their master's masquerade._

Natsuki couldn't see how Shizuru was dressed on the day she left for Kyoto because the girl was inside the carriage. But it was safe to assume now that the girl dressed in men's clothes whenever she left the island. Possibly, the villagers of Fuuka didn't even know that it wasn't the real Eiji, who greeted them today. Why did she present herself to the outside world as 'Fujino Eiji'? How long had she been doing this? Perhaps, it was the reason Eiji was forbidden to leave the mansion altogether. To make matters worse, their father seemed to be the one encouraging this pattern of behavior.

_Holy crap. These people are really creepy. _

"Ah—that—that hurts…!" Shizuru's sudden yelp broke Natsuki's train of thoughts.

Natsuki looked ahead and saw a murky view of Midori moving behind Shizuru's shoulder. The redhead seemed to be busied with something over Shizuru's arm.

"Stay still. I said, stay still…! Now, tell me who did this to you." Midori's tone was full of authority. It seemed rather strange for a maid to be talking like this to her master, but Shizuru didn't seem to mind all that much.

The girl sighed. "It was an accident. I should have been more careful."

"People don't cut other people, and call it an 'accident'. Who did this?" Midori's gaze became intense.

Shizuru softly drew her arm back, pulling the long sleeve to cover up the bandages.

"This is unacceptable, Shizuru-sama! Does Masaru-sama know about this?"

"I am tired. I want to rest." Shizuru then looked up to the maids around the room. "Thank you. You all may leave."

The maids bowed and left the room at once, but Midori sat in her place, unmoving. The woman waited until the maids disappeared from the passageway, confident that the two of them were finally alone.

"You planned for only a few days at the Capital, but then the trip was prolonged for two weeks. I didn't hear a word from you. I didn't even know when you'd be back. What happened?" Midori spoke more casually now, but deep concern still lingered in her tone.

For a long moment, Shizuru looked away from the woman. "I ran into someone I knew, that was all. Just an old friend."

"Is it the same one that wounded you?"

"It was an accident, and father does not need to know about this."

"But—"

Shizuru gestured at the direction the maids had gone. "I trust that they will not talk. You, too, understood?" Midori opened her mouth again, but Shizuru cut her short. "I am really tired. I have not slept for two days. We can talk in the morning."

"All right. All right, if you say so." Midori stood up, patting her navy kimono a bit.

"Thank you, Midori," Shizuru said, lightly tapping on her bandaged arm.

"By the way, you did a terrible job of dressing the wound."

"Hmm? It was Kiyoshi."

"Ha, that boy needs to stay away from you. He just doesn't know his place!" Midori swung her fist, and it made Shizuru chortle.

Clutching the edge of the passageway, Natsuki raised a brow at the name. _Kiyoshi…? Oh, that imprudent samurai who dragged me away from the dock…_

Midori then headed towards the doorway on the other side of the room, but stopped. She rested one hand on the sliding door, turning back to her master. "Oh, what about that girl, the one with weird name? She has been asking for you for weeks now. She's annoyed me to no end."

Shizuru paused for a bit. "She saw me at the dock today."

Midori's eyes widened. "As Eiji-sama?"

Shizuru sat still, her face grim.

Midori rushed back into the room, crawling towards her master. "I am so sorry! I didn't think that she'd wander off that far. She's been spending a lot of time with Eiji-sama, and I thought they were always together, so—so I didn't keep an eye on her… It's my fault. I am so sorry!"

"So she met Eiji…" Shizuru kept quiet for a while. "It is all right. She isn't allowed to leave the mansion without my consent. The secret is still safe."

Midori's face screwed up in guilt, her hands clutching her knees. "If it worries you, I will kill her for you."

_WHAT! _Natsuki inwardly screamed at the notion.

Shizuru laughed aloud. "Do not talk of murder at this time of night, or you'd be dreaming of it. This is a small problem. I will take care of it. Now, go take some rest, Midori."

Reluctantly, Midori took leave, and slid the doors on the other side of the room shut. At this moment, only the doors to the garden, where Natsuki was hiding, were left open. Natsuki waited, hoping that Shizuru would turn in, so that she could sneak away. She got all the answers she needed now, and the most important one was to run for her life. Not another day she would want to spend here.

But Natsuki froze in her spot when the girl didn't put out the candles. Shizuru walked out of the room and instead sat down along the wooden passageway, hanging her long legs down and swaying them a little. Looking up at the night sky, a smile eventually graced upon the pale face. For a moment, Natsuki was taken by the serene look in those crimson eyes, but the thought of Midori's murderous proposal pierced into her mind, reminding her not to fall for the façade of innocence.

_Okay. I should go like… now…_

Natsuki slowly turned and crawled away further into the thick woods.

"Who's there!"

Crawling on all fours, Natsuki froze at the shout. Shizuru had seemed to spot her, and now the girl had come after her. At the sound of rushing footsteps, Natsuki had got only a second to decide what to do next.

There was no time to play hide and seek now. Natsuki shot up to her feet and started to run as fast as she could. Perhaps, it was dark. Perhaps, she was lost. It felt like she had run for a good distance, but she had to stop dead in her tracks when she found Shizuru suddenly popping up from the bushes, leaves spurting over her head and shoulders.

Both girls screamed in panic, but quickly fell silent. Panting, Natsuki stared at Shizuru without blinking an eye. Beads of cold sweat dripped down her forehead as she clenched both hands. If she could get out of here alive tonight, she swore never to ride her Ducati faster than 60 mph again.

Shizuru relaxed first, stepping out of the bushes. "Oh, it is you again. What are you doing here?"

Although it was dark where they stood, the light from the west wing offered them some rim light over the contour of their faces and bodies. Only then Natsuki took notice of the white rabbit in Shizuru's grasp. Shizuru hadn't followed her, but the tiny animal. At the realization, Natsuki mentally kicked herself in the butt for showing herself without any need.

"How did you know—how—" Shizuru glanced around as she was briefly at a loss for words. She then gently caressed the rabbit's head. "Ah, right. I heard that my brother had shown you around. Did you like his company?"

_If I say 'yes', you'll probably confine me in this place with him forever. Evil. Evil, I say…_

Natsuki stiffly gestured at the rabbit. "Are you going to eat it?"

Shizuru raised the rabbit up to her nose and smiled. "Why? Are you hungry?"

"No!" Natsuki reached out as if to take the poor rabbit from harm's way.

The noble girl stopped. "I was… only teasing you." Chuckling, she knelt down and let the rabbit run off her hands and into the bushes.

Natsuki's shoulders relaxed as she involuntarily let out a sigh in relief. "Do you always run in the woods at night? I thought you were going to sleep."

Shizuru stood up and pulled the collar of her kimono closer. The smile on her face disappeared, and she looked as cold as when Natsuki saw her at the dock. "Have you been watching me earlier? Did you hear everything?"

Natsuki mentally smacked herself at the slip. "I—well—not much… like how you were tired and all—umm—"

"Who sent you?"

"What?" Natsuki frowned. "Oh… No. No. No. I told you that I was lost. Please, I don't mean you any harm. Just let me go."

Shizuru stared straight at her. "You just woke up one day in my mansion like some magic, and you expect me to believe it."

"Yes!" Natsuki's face reddened in frustration. "It sounds crazy even to me, but you have to believe it. I swear I will not tell anyone about your—your creepy cross-dressing. I have nothing to lose or gain with your secret."

Shizuru looked away, clearly displeased. "It is a matter of life and death. Do not compare it with your so-called 'magic'."

Her head bowed, Natsuki's arms flung down to her sides in defeat. "Seriously, I was not sent here. I do not want to be here. I don't want to know anything about you or your secrets. What could I do to make you believe me? I'd do anything."

"Where is the Fujino manor you mentioned before?" Shizuru's eyes narrowed. She walked up to Natsuki, and her aloof gaze sent chill down Natsuki's spine. "I have given you a chance to tell me the truth. I even offered you a place to stay. But it is becoming clear now that you are here with hidden agendas. You were trying to spy on me. This is final. You will not leave this place until I find out who your master is."

Natsuki's mouth hung open in disbelief. "You have no rights to keep me here! I—I've got a father to go back to!"

"He can wait." Shizuru turned away, but Natsuki rushed to block her.

"You can't do this to me!" Natsuki hastily grabbed and pulled the girl's arm. Easily, Shizuru moved at her will, and Natsuki realized then that it was the wounded arm. She instantly letting go off Shizuru. "Oh—I'm sorry… I…"

Shizuru stared down her nose at the raven-haired woman. "I can do anything here. It is as simple as that."

Natsuki watched the taller girl, a part of her wondering where the smiley, kind girl had gone. Perhaps, she should not rely much on a stranger's kindness. Sighing, she shook her head in exasperation. "But I've done nothing wrong. I'm not a prisoner. I'm not your brother!"

At those words, Shizuru sharply looked away. Somehow it always struck the girl whenever her brother was mentioned. "What did Eiji tell you?"

"He said that you're kind. I guess he was lying, too."

Scoffing, Shizuru then strode away. "We are all some fools, I suppose."

Natsuki shut her eyes tightly at all the frustrations and disappointments overwhelming in her heart. She took in a deep breath and looked up, her gaze filled with the last thread of determination she could find. "I don't think I'll ever ask anything from you again after tonight… but I need to know this…"

For some reasons unknown, Shizuru decided to stop, and slowly turned to Natsuki.

"How did it end…? What did it say in the notebook?" Natsuki asked with a trembled voice. It bitterly amused her that an old, nonsensical notebook was the only link to her sanity here.

It took Shizuru a long moment before she spoke again. "Kruger… Natsuki Kruger, is it?"

Natsuki couldn't help it. Tears unwillingly shot to her eyes, when now there was only one person in this world who could call her name. It was such an irony that it happened to be a complete stranger, who might somehow have an idea who she was. At this moment, the world suddenly seemed larger and far lonelier than she could have ever imagined.

Shizuru's gaze softened. Could it be that the girl saw her tears even in the dark? Natsuki blushed as she angrily brushed away the wet drops with the sleeve of her brown, soiled kimono.

There were a few times that Shizuru looked at her, and then looked away. It took the girl some moments to whisper those words she didn't seem to want to say. "Some of the pages were written in Japanese, many others in foreign letters I do not know. The writer lived to be an old, lonely woman, who mourned for her long lost love, the love she never had courage to admit… She never left this place, Kruger-san. People say that there has been an angry, sad spirit up on the hill, and in some occasions, I thought that it could be the dead writer's spirit. You do not want to be her…, and I hope that you will not be."

With that, Shizuru turned and walked away. Natsuki could only stand in the dark, while all those words kept echoing in her head, crushing down any hopes she had had.


	9. C9: A New Page

**A/N: **Sorry about the wait. So much more work than I expected. Now, on with the story :)

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><p><strong>Chapter 9: A New Page<strong>

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**::**

Resting the back of her left hand over her forehead, Natsuki was lying flat on the thin futon, staring up at the wooden ceiling. Her eyes hot, it ached just to lift her arm. Her mind drifted away to the encounter with Shizuru a week ago. There was the mysterious notebook, the dead writer and the angry spirit. Even though Shizuru claimed that there were some parts of the texts that she couldn't understand, it was rather obvious that the girl didn't want to reveal much of what else she knew.

All Natsuki knew was that 'Natsuki Kruger' in the notebook never returned to her world, and lived a sad life until the end. This particular thought had left Natsuki depressed ever since. And for the past few days, she had been stranded in bed with fever and a heavy heart. All hopes to see her father and friends again were lost.

At twenty years of age, she had lived her life with strength and resolution, but hearing the bitter end of 'her' life from someone else was something else entirely. In other occasions, she would never believe in such a thing as fortune telling, but ever since she woke up to find herself in this strange land, her will was rendered feeble, and fate was no longer in her own hand. What Shizuru said that night instantly killed the tiniest hope she had hidden in her heart that she might find peace and happiness one day. The idea of ending up like Madam Fujino scared her too much for her to admit.

At the sound of approaching footsteps, Natsuki glanced out through the rolled-down screen. She expected to see a maid coming to inform her of Eiji's daily visit as he had been visiting her every day. Instead, she found Shizuru in a jaded pink kimono, sitting on her heels on the other side of the screen. The chestnut tresses were tied back with a crimson ribbon, hanging down to the middle of her back. Shizuru was dressed like a normal girl today, her red lips giving sharp contrast to her ashen skin.

Natsuki sprung up to a sitting position, pulling the white blanket up to her chest to cover her wrinkled yukata. "W—What are you doing here?"

Shizuru's face appeared brighter than the last time they had met. Presumably, the girl had felt better physically. Shizuru cleared her throat and said, "I am sorry that I appear abrupt. Midori had just informed me this morning of your condition. Are you all right?"

Natsuki rubbed the back of her head. "I'd have expected you to send more guards."

"That would be unnecessary. How are you feeling?"

For some reasons, Natsuki couldn't help but feel relieved to see Shizuru here on good terms. The stress she had felt earlier surprisingly subsided, albeit slowly. "I'll survive. How's your arm?"

Shizuru instantly glanced to her right to see if the maids were around. Natsuki became curious if anyone but Shizuru's circle of maids knew of her injury—if Eiji knew what happened. She wondered how close the siblings were, if at all. They never appeared together as far as she had witnessed. Perhaps, what their father had orchestrated was the factor that separated the siblings apart. Even if Eiji seemed to be one caged from the outside world, Natsuki couldn't decide if it was Shizuru who was trapped from being herself.

"I am fine now. The wound healed nicely. Thank you for your concern," Shizuru replied with a calm tone.

Natsuki then looked down in a slight guilt. "I didn't mean to spy on you the other night. I wanted to talk to you, but then I heard… I heard Midori wanting to get rid of me—" She had to stop midsentence due to Shizuru's sudden giggle. Her brows raised in confusion.

Shizuru smiled. "Ara, please do not fear Midori. She is fierce and loyal, but a kind woman. I will not let anyone harm you while you are here."

"You don't mean to keep me here forever, right?" Natsuki frowned, clutching the edge of the blanket.

"Forever sounds scary, does it not?" Shizuru chuckled. "When I am certain that you are no threat to us and our secret, you will be free to leave."

Natsuki inwardly grumbled, but she was sure that they would find nothing on her since she had done nothing wrong. Time would be on her side, and Shizuru would soon release her. "What about your brother? What are you doing to him? It is wrong… so wrong…"

Shizuru forced out a smile, the crimson gaze looking away. "It is kind of you to be so concerned for him, but this is a family matter, which I do not feel comfortable to discuss right now. Please understand that we are only doing it for his sake."

"So many secrets, huh?" Natsuki stared down at the blanket. "Why are you here then? You came just to tell me what I already knew, that I'll be locked up here indefinitely?"

After a moment of long silence, Natsuki looked up again at the rustling sound. Shizuru had slipped a notebook under the screen. Reluctantly, Natsuki crawled out of her bed and picked up the notebook. It looked just like the old notebook, but she flipped through to find empty pages. It was brand-new.

"I am sorry that I was harsh to you the other night. Sometimes it is better not to speak—to know. I did not mean to make you worry. The writer could not have been you, but since you seemed to take it personally, I want to apologize… I came to see how you are doing, and to offer you a new notebook, so that you could start your own story. No one could write it for you, could they?" At that, Shizuru stood up and left.

It took Natsuki a moment to study the notebook in her hands. It felt warm. It felt familiar. It felt real, unlike the old, crumpled pages she had held before. Before she knew, she shot up to her feet. She ran towards the screen, lifted it up, and slipped out into the passageway. She rushed after the chestnut-haired girl, so fast that she bumped into her back, causing Shizuru to stop in her tracks.

Shizuru turned to face Natsuki, blinking a few times in bewilderment. "Kruger-san?"

Natsuki took a tiny step back, breathing hard from just a short running distance. Hugging the notebook to her chest, she could feel her fast heartbeat so clearly that she thought she could hold her heart in her hands. She froze when Shizuru came closer to her and rubbed her arms.

"You are still ill. You should not be out here without warmer clothes on," Shizuru said, worry residing in her voice.

Perhaps, it was her fever, or else she would have retreated away from a stranger's touch. But Natsuki couldn't seem to turn away for Shizuru's warm hands and body heat were strangely welcomed at the moment. "You told me about the angry spirit up on the hill. Why did you think it's the writer?"

Shizuru took a moment to ponder and then nodded a little. "There were stories about a strange woman, who used to live up on the hill. Many years after her death, people believed that her spirit was still there, refusing to leave until her love return. Her origin remained a mystery, but her life had some resemblances to what was written in the old notebook, that was why I thought they could be the same person…" The girl scratched her cheek a little, giving out a frustrated sigh. "But then I do not understand how she had left her notebook in this mansion, if she were not one of the Fujino family. Ara, it is just my own flawed theory. I cannot seem to put all the puzzle pieces together. You cannot be her, Kruger-san. You should not pay serious thoughts to—"

"Please, take me there! I want to know more." Natsuki's eyes brightened in hope, her lips breaking into an excited grin. "I don't know what I'll get from it, but I want to see the place. There might be something—anything. I want to see what was written in the notebook. Please?"

Shizuru merrily chortled, causing Natsuki to blush. She didn't know what she had done to earn such a bright smile from the girl.

"If you wish, I could ask Eiji to take you there," Shizuru said.

Natsuki blinked in confusion. "I thought you knew the way."

"I do. But I have heard that he has been visiting you every day. I do not wish to steal his time away from you."

"What?" Natsuki frowned. "It's not like we spend all day everyday together. He'd be here for an hour a day at most, but then I'd spend my time alone for the rest of the day. You, on the other hand, never came, even if you're the one who won't let me leave this place," she sulked.

A smile graced Shizuru's placid face again. "Were you waiting for me to show up?"

"Sort of—I—I mean that I don't spend that much times with Eiji. We're not that close." Natsuki didn't know why she was blushing, but Shizuru's stare was making her feel extremely uncomfortable. "Besides, you'll make a better lead. I don't even know if he cares about the spirit we talked about. He might think I'm crazy, wanting to go there. You know what I mean, right…? Right?"

Shizuru bit her bottom lip to stop herself from smiling. "It is almost noon. We should hurry if we want to make it there before nightfall. Please get ready and wear warmer clothes. I will be waiting for you in the center hall," she said, and walked away.

_Yes!_

Natsuki grinned as she watched the girl disappearing from her sight. She then ran back into her room and got herself readied with a fresh, warm bath. Hopefully, she wouldn't take too long for the girl to wait.


	10. C10: The Long Road

**Chapter 10: The Long Road**

Natsuki followed Shizuru along the narrow path uphill. She was dressed in a lime-colored kimono, clumsily treading on the wooden geta. Her long hair was let loose, blowing with the soft, cool wind. The light air around her felt soothing in the sun, but the walk had soon become exhausting. Shizuru had led the way into the deep forest for an hour now, and the girl showed no sign of slowing down. As if on cue, Shizuru turned around to Natsuki, and smiled in amusement.

"I play basketball, and I do surf…" Natsuki muttered, picking up her speed to catch up with the taller girl. "But I can't say I'm a sporty person. I don't like walking. It's… It's boring… Jeez…" She irritably jerked her right geta out from the pool of mud, and then cursed at the splash of dark spots on her kimono and legs.

Shaking her head, Shizuru started walking again. "You keep mentioning strange things I have never heard of. It makes me wonder what your country is like."

Natsuki rushed to keep up with the girl, and when they were at the same pace. "The right word should be 'my world'. And I can tell you right now that it's very different from yours. We ride motorcycles and cars—and—and we've got planes and ships. Oh, definitely, we've got phones and internet. Whatever. You wouldn't understand anyway. And we don't walk on getas into the woods anymore. Oh, on another thought, it's slightly better than heels… Yeah—"

Natsuki only stopped talking when Shizuru paused in her tracks. She looked up to see a curious look in the girl's eyes. She didn't know whether it was the oddity of the conversation, or the sheer fixation of Shizuru's stare, she just had to look down. "You think I'm crazy, don't you?"

"A little strange."

"You're being nice." Natsuki scratched her head, and sighed in defeat. "Whatever I've told you, please believe that I am telling the truth. I'm not from here. I don't belong here… in your world."

After a moment of silence, Shizuru lightly patted Natsuki's shoulder, and continued the walk. "Do not fret. I am getting used to your strangeness, and I say that I am quite fascinated by it. But that is life, I suppose. Life is strange."

Upon hearing the comforting words, Natsuki closely followed Shizuru, and lightly poked the girl with her elbow. "Uh-huh, dressing up as your brother makes you even weirder than me."

"I suppose we are a match somehow," Shizuru said, chuckling.

Natsuki blushed, taken by surprise by Shizuru's take on it. She thought that she might upset the girl for bringing the subject of Eiji up again, but she couldn't deny that she secretly wished for Shizuru to slip. It seemed that the girl had read her too well.

Before long, they stopped to take a lunch break. Shizuru had carried bento for both of them, along with a violet-colored, paper umbrella. Natsuki had offered to help, but Shizuru politely refused. It amused Natsuki that an upper-class girl like Shizuru seemed to like handling things herself, while she could easily have her maids do it for her. Midori had wanted to follow them out here, but Shizuru wouldn't want another fight between them to ruin the sunny day.

"Are you hungry?" Shizuru sat down at a big sakura tree. A thick plane of sakura leaves blanketed the ground, acting as a cushion for her.

Natsuki sank down beside her. "Oh, good! I'm starving!" For some reasons, her graceless demeanor earned her another smile from Shizuru. Her cheeks suddenly felt warm, and she decided that it was only her being exhausted from the long walk.

"When Midori knew that I would not allow her to come with us, she made this for us instead. We should be thankful to her. She is certainly more thoughtful and gentle than you might think," Shizuru said, nodding as she took another bite from the rice balls.

Natsuki couldn't help but smile at how Shizuru appreciated an easy meal cooked by her maid. Midori must have been more than just a faithful servant to the girl, almost like a big sister, if one would say. Her thoughts then drifted back to her own world, where she once had someone like Midori by her side. Mai had been the closest friend she had have, caring and understanding her in situations most people would turn their back to her.

"You look sad now. What is troubling you, Kruger-san?"

Natsuki stared down at a rice ball in her hands. She hadn't taken a bite yet. "It's… It's _Natsuki_. You can call me 'Natsuki' from now on." She then took a big bite and chewed as fast as she could. It was inept to think back—to ponder. Perhaps, it was time to move on in this strange, new place she had not known before.

A softest smile graced Shizuru's lips as she looked down. "That is nice of you."

They quietly ate their lunch, and soon started trekking uphill once again. Natsuki wiped the sweat off her forehead with the edge of her sleeve. Although her body felt tired, her will to carry on overcame it. Not another word of complain escaped her mouth. She wanted to reach the place. She wanted to see it with her own eyes as it might solve the riddle.

Shizuru eventually stopped and pointed forward. "That is the hut they say haunted. It has been left empty for many years now."

Natsuki paused. There was a small cabin locating just a hundred meters ahead of them. It seemed strange to see a shelter in the middle of nowhere. She could hear the sound of waves crashing not too distant away, and she could tell that they were high above the shores by now. She didn't like the sound, the height, or the thought of staying for too long, but something just drew her to it. She moved ahead Shizuru, heading towards the cabin without waiting for the girl.

Natsuki slid the worn, shoji door open. She inwardly flinched at the creaky sounds the wood gave, and the smell of lavender that suddenly hit her hard. It was the same scent she smelled when she first met Shizuru, the same one that had haunted her for a long time. She stepped inside and inspected the area. A small, dusted, low table stood in the middle of the room. There was a torn, wooden partition standing in the right corner, presumably separating a part of this tiny space into a sleeping area. A thick web of dust covered a cupboard to her left. The cabin seemed peaceful in its melancholy isolation.

All of a sudden, the wind became harsh and pushed the windows open. Natsuki raised one hand above her eyes, squinting. She couldn't tell where the wind came from as she looked out and around to see how still the leaves on the ground outside were.

Shizuru rushed into the cabin and closed some of the windows. When the wind calmed, she then turned around, inspecting the place a little. "I have been here only once when I was a child. I was lost in the woods and found this cabin. My father would not let me come back here again when it was rumored around the island that it is haunted. They say the evil spirit will affect your life, bringing bad luck."

"There is no such thing as spirits. At least, they don't exist in my world." Natsuki shrugged. She ran her hand along the table and pulled the web in her hand.

Standing by a window, Shizuru lifted the curtain of web and blankly stared at it. "I am curious about your world. What is it like?"

Before Natsuki could answer the question, thunders rambled. Dark, thick clouds invaded the sky. Everything dimmed down in a matter of seconds, and the wind began to rock the door and windows again. Out of the blue, she snapped at the sound of footsteps. She turned around a few times, her eyes searching vigilantly. She swore she could feel a presence around the cabin, but it wasn't Shizuru or her. There was someone else. Turning around, she tried to catch the intruder in the act, but it escaped her every time.

Natsuki moved besides a window near the doorway, and peeked out. "Do you have enemies?"

Shizuru blinked in confusion. "Well… some…"

"Then we should leave. We might be followed."

Frowning, Shizuru walked towards Natsuki and looked out the window. "I do not see anyone. Besides, they could not have followed me here. This is Fuuka Island."

"_They_…" Natsuki turned to look at Shizuru. "Who are they?"

Shizuru stood still for a moment, and then gazed back at Natsuki.

Now, their gazes locked. "Are they the same people who hurt you? Was it… Was it because they thought you were Eiji?" Natsuki whispered.

The question left Shizuru in silence. The wind became harsher, and the windows gave out creaky sounds to fill in the silence between them. Reluctantly, Shizuru reached out to tuck the strands of raven hair behind Natsuki's ear. Her heart beating faster, Natsuki counted every second for an answer.

"If I told you, you will never leave this island again," Shizuru said, chuckling.

Natsuki couldn't tell if Shizuru was just teasing or not, but her curiosity was getting the best of her.

_Maybe there's a reason I was sent here. Maybe it's meant to be…_

Natsuki grimaced at the thought. Everything happened for a reason, but she had not yet found why she was caught in this apparent time-loop of the past. She could only hope to get some clues, which might be able to help her break out of this mess.

"When Eiji turned thirteen, he was arranged to marry Princess Akane, but he was poisoned by his rivals. He nearly died, and it took him years to recover." Shizuru then looked out into the greenness outside, her gaze calm. "My father thought that since we both look so much alike, I should take his role instead. He expects me to uphold our family's importance in the imperial court until Eiji is well enough, or… until he is willing to marry again. He is eighteen years old now, but he has refused every woman father has founded for him. Duty to him is nothing now. He has changed."

"Oh, I'm glad he did. You shouldn't listen to your father. You're not being yourself. It's not a life." Natsuki then frowned. "I don't know much about politics in court, but… did they hurt you for the same reason they poisoned Eiji?"

Shizuru then sat down at the low table. "No, it was a misunderstanding. I know that person rather well. We have been… friends for several years. I know that she certainly did not mean it."

"Wow. So it's a woman." Natsuki followed to the table and sat down opposite to Shizuru.

Shizuru looked up and down, avoiding the emerald, curious stare.

Natsuki raised her brows and grinned. "I heard Midori talking about one of your guards. What's his name again? Err—oh, _Kiyoshi_! Right. Shouldn't he be able to protect you from that vicious girl at the Capital?"

Shizuru bit her bottom lip, fixing her gaze on the filthy, tatami floor. "Kiyoshi is just a guard. He does not interfere with my personal matters."

Natsuki shrugged. "Well, what about you? When will you marry? You're seventeen now, aren't you?"

Shizuru nodded. "It is up to my father to decide. He knows the best for both of us. To the world, Fujino Shizuru is the ill one, confined to bed in the Fuuka mansion. She does not leave the island until Eiji marries. To the people beyond Fuuka, she does not exist."

At the last words, Natsuki paused for a moment. "But you are real to me."

Shizuru's head shot up at the words. She opened her mouth to speak, but stopped at the sudden, heavy downpour. She looked out the window, sulking at the sudden change of climate. "It is good that we had lunch before. It might take a while for the rain to stop. How strange. It is nearing winter, yet it still rains."

"It's so dark outside." Natsuki watched the thick clouds moving fast in the sky. She rubbed her arms as the air became colder, the wind harsher.

Shizuru noted Natsuki's slight quiver, and instantly moved to the cupboard. She opened it and searched through things. There were ceramic pots and bowls, all covered in thick dust.

"Huh. Someone did actually live here. You're sure it was the writer?" Natsuki remarked.

"That is what they say."

"How long has it been since her death?"

"No one seems to know for sure."

Natsuki rested her chin on her palm, watching Shizuru fumbling through stuff in the cupboard. "If nobody knows any concrete story about this writer, why did you think it's her spirit after all?"

"To answer your doubt, I suppose it is their love stories that matched. Since this island is closed to the outsiders, I could guess that she was not just a stranger wandering into this island. Plus, she was a foreigner. It made it more obvious." Shizuru turned around to face Natsuki, beaming. "Candles!"

"You don't mean that we might be stuck here for hours, right?" Natsuki didn't particularly enjoy the idea of spending long hours inside this old, creepy cabin. Besides, they didn't have any food left for dinner. She suddenly missed the warm, soft bed in the mansion. Even if she hated being stuck here, having maids arranging things for her at will was something else. In the end, she was still a spoilt brat her father and Mai seemed to want her to be.

Shizuru crawled back to the low table. She took a rusty candle stand and put a candle on top of it. She then lit the candle up, lending some more light inside the hut. "There are more candles stored in the cupboard. But we should be careful with it just in case the rain does not stop soon."

Natsuki rubbed her temples, her face twisting in displease. "Now, I wish Midori had tagged along. She might be a bit more useful than you in situation like this."

"What an insult, Kruger-san—"

"It's 'Natsuki'. Don't make me repeat myself." Natsuki rolled her eyes.

"I promise that we will get through the day, or night unscathed, _Natsuki_."

Natsuki smirked. "Like your arm? No, thanks."

"It was a misunderstanding. Do not make me repeat myself," Shizuru said with a straight face.

Natsuki grinned, now resting her chin on both palms. "Tell me about the girl. Who is she? Is she always fierce and scary?"

Immediately, Shizuru looked away.

"Come on. Don't be shy."

"It is a personal matter—"

"Is she Eiji's lover, or yours?"

Shizuru's eyes widened at the question. "P—Pardon?"

"Well, did she know that you are not the real Eiji?"

Shizuru closed her eyes for a moment, and then let out a sigh. "I am beginning to think that it was a mistake to let you know about this."

Natsuki's brows knitted in perplexity. "You wouldn't even tell Midori about this girl. Why did you tell me?"

For a long moment, Shizuru just stared at the raven-haired woman. Her lips moved a few times, but paused before a word come out. She then straightened herself up. "Like you said, I feel that you do not belong here, and what I told you would mean… nothing. I have no idea why I feel that way. My imagination convinces me that you are unreal, that… you are the writer, which is impossible… Is it?"

Natsuki stopped. Her gaze slowly dropped to the table. In all honesty, she didn't know where she was. She didn't know if she was dreaming. She didn't know if she was still sane after all. What impossible had become possible. What was unimaginable had become real.

Shizuru reached out her hand across the table and took Natsuki's in her hers. The warmth from the girl pulled Natsuki back from the oblivion she was in. She looked up at the girl, holding her breath.

"As much as you want, I want to know why you are here… Everything happens for a reason."

Natsuki breathed again. She was not alone on this long, mystifying road after all.

* * *

><p>The rain continued to pour. It had been hours and showed no sign of stopping. The murky sky turned into black. The sun had set. Sitting next to the front door, Shizuru toyed with the umbrella. It wasn't much help in this severe climate. They both would fell ill in this cold, wet weather, if they so wished to trek back to the mansion in the rain.<p>

Natsuki had spent hours walking around, inspecting the cabin, and now sitting next to the window, glancing out at the dark sky. She hugged her knees and clamped her jaw shut, shivering more and more each second past. It seemed that the more she wished to leave this place, the heavier the rain fell.

Without a word, Shizuru left the umbrella at the doorway, and walked towards the grubby partition. She pulled and spread out the worn mattress kept in the corner. She then gestured for Natsuki to come closer. "You should get some rest. It is likely that we will spend a night here."

"Where's Midori? Your guards? Why don't they come find you?" Natsuki groaned, resting her chin on her knees. She watched the girl tapping the dust from the mattress.

Shizuru chuckled. "It seems to be our bad luck. I told them not to disturb me."

"So it's all your fault. Jeez, I'm hungry." Natsuki crawled towards the mattress. At the very least, it looked warmer behind the partition. Hugging her arms, she then lied down on the mattress.

Shizuru pulled a thin blanket over Natsuki. "I will wake you when the rain stops."

Natsuki grabbed Shizuru's wrist and pulled her in before she could move away. Shizuru toppled over her, and they both halted. Their faces were so close that that they could feel each other's warm breath.

"Uh—w—well, where are you going?" Natsuki stuttered, softly brushing the strands of chestnut hair from her face. Discomfort instantly filled her chest as she was under Shizuru's watchful gaze.

"You are still unwell, so you should take some rest."

Natsuki paid no attention to Shizuru's excuse and pulled the girl down next to her. She closed her eyes and said, "We'll wake again when the sky is clear. Now, sleep." She could feel Shizuru's body tensed beside her, but she didn't dare to open her eyes. There had always been a weird feeling whenever she was close to the girl, always a little more than that familiar scent of lavender, but she didn't want to take the sentiment into consideration. She believed that she just wasn't used to being close to strangers.

After a while, Natsuki could feel Shizuru relax a little, slightly turning into a more comfortable position. She only opened her eyes again when Shizuru's breathing became regular and quiet, then she found that the girl was already fast asleep.

"Hey… Hey… Shizuru…" Natsuki tenderly pulled the girl's arm, but there was no response. Shizuru fell into deep slumber as soon as her head hit the mattress. It seemed that Shizuru was as tired as she was. Wide-eyed, she inwardly griped; she would be totally alone in the dark now.

Suddenly, Natsuki snapped. If she wasn't mistaken, a set of shadow had passed the window beyond the partition. The murky shadow appeared to be the same one she saw this afternoon, the one circling around the cabin. What more noticeable now was the strands of silver, long hair flowing in the wind as it moved.

Natsuki sat up, her gaze darting around, watching every gap between the windows. There was someone near, someone watching them. Was it Shizuru's enemy, or was it her own imagination? She got up from the mattress, following the shadow, which became more apparent each time, from one window to another. It seemed to repeat its path, moving from one spot to another.

Natsuki shut her eyes for a moment before she muttered, "Natsuki… Natsuki Kruger…?"

She knew that she sounded insane just now, but it was the only theory she could come up with. "Na—Natsuki Kruger…? Kruger…? Answer me…!" She rushed towards the front door and slid it open. The wind swept in, killing the candlelight inside. The rain still fell hard, and she could see nothing in the dark outside of the cabin. She squinted, turning around.

_Where did it go?_

She turned around, but froze, her breath caught in her throat. What appeared before her was no longer a set of passing shadow, but an old woman with silver, long hair, standing at the low table. Then she passed in front of Natsuki, and out the front door. Natsuki couldn't count how many times the old woman repeated her tracks, but the vision seemed to replicate itself countless times like a skipped, bad, old film. What startled her even more was the smell of lavender that struck her every time the old woman passed her to go through the front door.

Natsuki rubbed her eyes a few times, trying to rid herself of the fatigue. She couldn't have been imagining it, could she? Then the old woman walked out of the cabin and headed into the woods. Natsuki reluctantly followed. She needed to know what was going on, who the old woman was.

The old woman eventually stopped in the middle of the forest and knelt down, her silver hair hanging down, hiding her face. She started digging into the ground with her bare hands. All the while, she mumbled things that Natsuki could not hear.

"Are… Are you… Natsuki Kruger…?" Natsuki tried to get the old woman's attention, but there was no response. The old woman kept digging until her fingertips bled.

When the hole was deep enough, the old woman took out a tiny, wooden box out of her pocket and buried it.

_What…_

Her whole body wet from the downpour, Natsuki watched the scene unfolded before her eyes as if she had seen it before.

_What's in it…?_

She wanted to know. She needed to know. Clenching her fists, she tried to move closer to the old woman, but her legs just wouldn't move. Her eyes became hot, and her breath ragged. She couldn't tell if they were tears or the rain that was bathing her cheeks. She wouldn't know why she would be crying, but her heart ached like it had never felt before. Her face paled. She reached her hand out as she watched the old woman covering the hole in the ground, burying what seemed to be her deepest secret.

She knew. She once knew. But she just couldn't tell what it was now. Natsuki bit her bottom lip and looked away. It hurt too much to watch. It took every ounce of energy within her to stand. Before she knew it, her knees gradually weakened, and she slid to the ground. Only then, she was shaken by a pair of warm hands.

"Natsuki… Natsuki…!"

Her heavy eyelids closed, Natsuki recognized it as Shizuru's voice. She wanted to call out for the girl, but her voice wouldn't come out. Shizuru spoke more words, but its content was lost to her numbed mind. Soon, everything became absolute black and silent.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Thanks** for dropping by :) Anyway, since I've got a bit more time these days, I'm going to try and finish the next chapter for 'Legend of the Vampire'. After a year of absence, I only got a page just a few days ago. =_=


	11. C11: Where It All Began

**Chapter 11: Where It All Began**

A groan escaped her throat. Natsuki stirred at the sound of bird chirping outside. She opened her eyes and squint at the rays of sunlight that slipped through the gaps between the wooden windows. She turned to face the partition to avoid the light, and grumbled at the physical discomfort. Her throat was dry, and her body ached all over. Her head heavy, she shivered at the cold morning air, and pulled the blanket up closer to her face. Only then she realized the touch of warm skin next to her.

Natsuki turned to look over her shoulder. Her eyes widened to see Shizuru lying beside her. It took her a moment as she studied the pale face, thinking back to what happened last night.

_Huh…?_

She lifted the blanket up just a tiny bit, and stopped at the sight of their naked bodies. Instantly, she pulled the blanket up to her chest and scuttled until her back leaned against the partition. "Wake up! Wake up now! You, wake up!"

Shizuru rubbed her eyes before looking up at Natsuki. She frowned upon seeing how startled her friend was. "Is there something wrong?"

Natsuki's face went red. She thought her head might burst literally. "We're naked, that's what's wrong!"

Yawning, Shizuru sat up. "But my maids see me naked all the time."

"I'm not your maid! You, pervert!"

Shaking her head, Shizuru got up to find her kimono hanging by the window. As if nothing out of ordinary happened, she put on her clothes and turned to Natsuki. "If I am not mistaken, your perception of what happened last night is that you think that something went on between us. It is a… a peculiar idea. Why did you suggest it?"

Natsuki promptly looked away, blushing. "I certainly didn't suggest it…! Then… then what happened?"

Shizuru grabbed Natsuki's kimono and gently put it on the mattress. "You sleepwalked into the woods last night and fainted. It took me quite a while before I found you. It rained heavily, so we both were soaked. I had to take off your clothes. Do you remember any of that?"

"Huh… No—yeah… No… Not really…" Natsuki hugged the blanket, frowning in confusion.

"You have serious problem." Shizuru nodded to herself.

Natsuki rolled her eyes. "I wasn't running away from you, right?"

"I hope not." Shizuru chuckled.

Natsuki rubbed her temples and made a face. "Baka."

Shizuru then moved towards the front door and slid it open. Two ceramic jars stood just outside, presumably taken from the cupboard. She smiled widely as she knelt down beside them. "After I brought you back here, I washed these jars and used them to keep some rainwater. We have something to drink and wash our faces."

Gradually, the first smile of the day graced Natsuki's face. She had to tip her head down a little to hide her smile. "That's… That's nice. Thank you."

While Natsuki put on her kimono behind the partition, she glanced out at Shizuru, watching if the girl was watching her. Shizuru was using a small cup to spoon up some water to drink. Not once that the girl turned her way.

_Silly. Silly. Silly thought. What a buffoon I've become…_

Natsuki walked out from behind the partition and joined Shizuru in front of the cabin. The morning sky was bright, and the air was slightly warmer now. Washing her face, she flinched a little at the cold water, but it was refreshing nonetheless.

"Did you sleep well last night?" Natsuki asked. The memories of last night stopped when Shizuru lied down beside her. Everything after that was a haze as far as she recalled.

Sitting on her heels, Shizuru looked out into the wild, cherishing the serenity for a moment. Perhaps, it was the greenness around them and the bluest sky that made Shizuru's tired face appear vibrant still. "You were murmuring in your sleep the whole night, and I thought some spirit had possessed you. I had to watch you the whole time, so I went to sleep just a bit before you woke me up with your foot."

"First of all, thank you. Second, there's no such thing as spirits. Third, I didn't wake you with a foot," Natsuki said with a stern voice, gulping more water down to satisfy her thirst.

"I apologize. If the people of your world do not believe in spirits, then what do you believe in?"

"Science." Natsuki shrugged. "Ah, don't worry. You'll get to know what it is like—like almost a thousand years from now, and you wouldn't be able to live without it."

Shizuru chortled. "You can live without it now here in 'my' world."

At the words spoken, Natsuki studied the person in front of her for the longest time. Sometimes unimaginable things did happen, and something just could not be denied. She could see Shizuru clearly. She knew the lavender scent, which had followed her across the plane of time. She still recalled the soft, warm touch of Shizuru's skin against hers this morning. Her senses did not deceive her; Shizuru was as real as it would get.

"It's gonna take me a while to get used to it, but I guess I will somehow," Natsuki muttered.

_The scent… I smelled it last night, too… _

Natsuki frowned.

_But when…?_

"We should return to the mansion. Midori must be worried sick by now." Shizuru stood up and extended one hand to Natsuki.

Natsuki glanced up at the calm face. Shizuru always had the peaceful smile of an angel. It amused her how a pretty face like that could pass as a boy to others. Instead, Shizuru looked girlishly handsome as 'Fujino Eiji'.

Shizuru inclined her head to the side, perplexed at Natsuki's stare. "Hmm?"

Natsuki looked away as she reluctantly took the hand and pushed herself up. "Let me help," she said when she saw Shizuru picking up the violet umbrella they had left outside the cabin since last night.

Shizuru made no response to Natsuki's offer. She raised the umbrella and started walking down the slope. "The weather is so great today. It will be a nice walk back. Come now."

Natsuki stood still for a moment before quickly followed. As they were at the same pace again, she kept her gaze down or looked elsewhere as much as she could. She had been noticing about the girl too much for her liking.

* * *

><p>It was well into the afternoon when Natsuki and Shizuru reached the mansion. The walk was long and exhausting, but Natsuki felt much lighter and more relaxed than yesterday. It felt good to be back somehow. She kept thinking about a warm bath, a warm bed, a nice meal, and a herd of maids to serve her.<p>

"Shizuru-sama! Shizuru-sama! You're back!"

Looking ahead, Natsuki saw Midori and Kiyoshi standing in front of the north gate.

Beaming, Midori ran towards her master. Before Shizuru could respond, Midori hugged her master's legs. "You're safe!"

Shizuru laughed. "Of course, I am fine," she said, and then turned to Natsuki, "It was raining, so we decided to spend a night at the cabin."

Midori sharply turned to Natsuki. "You are such a bad influence, Kroorujer! Do you realize how dangerous it is out there! There are wild animals and—"

"It is all right," Shizuru interrupted, smiling at her servant. "It was a strange experience, but I somehow found it pleasant."

"But they say—"

"The cabin was not haunted. It is just a rumor." Shizuru briefly glanced at Natsuki, leaving Natsuki in puzzlement.

_Huh, so… it was just sleepwalking, wasn't it?_

"We want to rest now. Let us go inside," Shizuru said.

Natsuki followed Shizuru, and stuck her tongue out at Midori as she passed the woman. Midori growled back in annoyance. But they both had to stop when Kiyoshi knelt down in front of his master. Shizuru herself took a step back, glancing left and right in perplexity.

"Please allow me to guard you next time. Yesterday was terrible. We could not carry out our duties, worrying why you did not come back," Kiyoshi said. His attentive gaze appeared almost pleading, almost too intimate for a servant to his master. "We could only imagine the worst possible. I do not wish for an accident like in Kyoto to happen again."

At the mention of the incident, Shizuru's gaze turned cold. All four of them knew of the incident, but only Shizuru knew what exactly happened. "If I need your assistance, I would tell you so. Do not question my judgment again."

Kiyoshi immediately bowed, his forehead touching the ground. "Yes, master."

Without another word, Shizuru stalked through the gate without looking back.

Natsuki watched as Kiyoshi slowly straightened up, and their gazes met. He would neither look away nor move out of the way. She couldn't tell if it was a challenge, but surely it wasn't a friendly one. New to this world, Natsuki decided to not make herself another enemy just yet. She moved out of his path and walked towards the gate. However, Midori pulled her arm back, stopping her in her tracks. It was a harsh grip, but it was to be expected from Shizuru's most loyal servant.

Midori eyed her up and down. "Don't try to trick us. You won't get too close to Shizuru-sama. I'll find out who you are."

Natsuki angrily brushed the hand off her. "You should listen to your master."

Midori's stern expression broke into a cold smile. "Master will leave for Kyoto today, and she won't be back for a while. Don't get too comfortable, I warn you."

Natsuki's brows knitted. "She's leaving again?"

"You're suddenly afraid?"

"Certainly not." Natsuki wasted no time to argue. She marched through the gate, keeping her head high and her pace even.

When she was out of Midori's sight, she ran towards the north wing of the mansion. Somehow, it angered her that Shizuru hadn't mentioned a word to her about leaving. When would Shizuru be back? She couldn't actually imagine living in the mansion with Midori around.

* * *

><p>"It will be a longer trip than usual. I will not be back here for several months."<p>

The maids bowed in response to Shizuru's stress.

Crawling behind the bushes, Natsuki peeked into Shizuru's room, observing how the maids diligently packed their master's belongings into big, weaving suitcases. It did look like Shizuru would be gone for a really long time, and the sight strangely left Natsuki a hollowed heart.

_Damn you…_

Natsuki watched as Shizuru sipped her hot tea, while the maids were busy running around in the room. Then something caught her eyes. Something almost stopped her heartbeat altogether.

"Will you bring it with you this time?" An aged maid crawled on her knees. In her hand was a wooden box with gold-plated borders.

Shizuru glanced at it, holding the teacup still. A short moment passed, she nodded and continued to sip her tea. The maid then bowed and retreated with the box.

_The box…_

Natsuki's whole being froze as if she was sucked into a still plane of time and space, her gaze fixing upon the box. She had seen it. She felt as though as she had touched it before. She had seen it in her dream last night.

_The woman with the silver hair. The one with the lavender scent…!_

Flashes of last night encounter with the spirit came back to her like a train wreck crashing into the side of a tunnel. She couldn't have been dreaming, could she? What she saw was real. At least, the box in the hand of 'Natsuki Kruger' was the same one she was seeing now.

A young maid entered the room and bowed. "The carriage is ready, Shizuru-sama."

The time was pressing. Natsuki had not a minute longer to think. Taking a deep breath in, she knew what she had to do. When Shizuru and the maids left, Natsuki leapt across the bushes and climbed into the room. She looked around the place, opening several suitcases in an attempt to find the box in question.

_Where is it? Where the hell is it…! Urgh! Come on…!_

She snapped at the sound of advancing footsteps. The heavy footsteps told her that it wasn't just the maids. Immediately, she climbed into the largest suitcase and pulled the lid close. Luckily, it was large enough to accompany Shizuru's clothes and Natsuki herself. She peeked out through the tiny gaps of the weaving lid and watched several samurais enter the room.

"Bring all of all of them." A samurai-clad man ordered the men behind him.

They started to lift all the suitcases. The two samurais, who were carrying Natsuki's case, grumbled at the unexpected extra weight.

"What is in it?" one of them questioned.

"It is so heavy. Is master not coming back again—"

"Be quiet! Carry them to the carriage!" the older samurai yelled.

Quickly, the young samurais stopped chatting and carried out the order.

Soon, Natsuki found herself carried out of the north wing and into a carriage. There were maids and samurais around, shouting at one another. They all seemed eager, even excited, for the trip. She didn't know what she had gotten herself into, but she stayed put until the caravan began to leave. Clutching Shizuru's clothes, she only prayed for the moment to pass. She didn't want to think what Shizuru would do if the girl found out.

* * *

><p>After the ride downhill, passing the markets and villages, they finally reached the dock. Many villagers moved along, carrying about their businesses. Noises and shouts filled the air with life and enthusiasm. Natsuki peeked out to see Midori alight from the horseback. The servant walked up to her master. Shizuru was now dressed in a blue kariginu with a black hat, posing as her brother.<p>

"I pray for your safe journey. After I take care of the matters here on Lord Masaru's order, I will be following you there."

Shizuru smiled, but stopped a little before she said, "Please take care of Natsuki."

"_Natsuki_?" Midori echoed. "You are on a first name basis with her now? She is a threat to your secrets. You cannot trust anyone."

Shizuru slightly nodded. "Take it as my plea, Midori. Give her some times to prove herself. I will be waiting for you in Kyoto." She patted Midori's shoulder, and walked towards the boat. She turned back to wave Midori goodbye.

Tears brimmed Midori's eyes, but Natsuki couldn't tell if they were tears of anger or remorse. "Yes, master. Anything you wish." Midori bowed until the boat left the dock.

Fortunately, along with other suitcases, Natsuki was carried into a private compartment on the boat, shaded under a tunnel-like, wooden roof.

Shizuru then entered the section, and let the curtains down to separate her from her guards on the boat. For a long moment, she just sat on the cushion prepared for her, gazing out at the shores through the tiny window. The sun was setting. They were leaving Fuuka Island. It felt as though they were going out to face the real world. Natsuki couldn't describe what she was feeling right now. It was exciting and intimidating at the same time. It did scare her of what might be waiting for her out there.

"Master Eiji…"

Shizuru looked up at the call as if it were her own middle name. Kiyoshi, in his brown clothes, appeared at the curtains.

Shizuru put hands on her knees. "What is it?"

Kiyoshi crawled in, and sat down opposite to his master. His dark eyes narrowed down, his face grim. There was a moment of silence between them. "You look tired. We did not expect you to spend a night at the cabin. We could have postponed this trip to next week."

"Father has already arranged the meeting. It is very important. I thank you for your concern, but I know what is best for the Fujino family."

"He does not love you like—"

"Know your place." Shizuru looked away.

Kiyoshi clamped his jaw shut, hurt in his eyes. "I know that very well. Every night when I go to sleep, I keep telling myself that. But I cannot stop worrying about you. You keep getting yourself in trouble, and your father does not care about you. He only cares about the reputation of the family—"

Shizuru shot up to her feet, clenching her fists and staring down at him. "While your parents deserted you, my father took you in when you were only a child. Remember that."

He gazed up at her, his gaze determined. He had shredded the humble look of a servant from his eyes, or was it that he never had it in the first place? It looked possessive, demanding even. "I would never betray your father. I am forever grateful to his kindness, but… but whenever it concerns you, I just cannot look away. You can tell me to stay away, Shizuru, but you cannot make me ignore you."

"You do not have to do anything else. Just follow my orders, and that should be—"

"I miss you."

At the simple words, Shizuru rubbed her face with both hands and sank back down on the floor.

Kiyoshi moved on his knees just a little bit closer to her, but still leaving a small space between them. "I cannot stop thinking about us. You have not looked at me the same way for a long time now. However you feel right now, I cannot look at anyone else the way I look at you. No one can compare to you… What have I done wrong? Please, tell me…"

Shizuru looked up at him, biting her bottom lip. "Kiyoshi… You should know that it is impossible. What we had was… It was a foolish dream. It is over."

His gaze dropped to the tatami floor. "_Over_. Why is it so easy for you to say it? You have become so cold."

Shizuru leaned back against the thin wall. Her gaze was filled with hurt, fear and reluctance. She kept silence for a long moment before she responded, "I fell in love."

Natsuki froze. The fact that Shizuru had a relationship with her servant was surprising, but the girl's blatant confession of love was something else. Not only that Natsuki never believed in such a notion as love, but she didn't understand why a stranger's intimate information could bother her like this.

After an awkward silence, Kiyoshi dryly chuckled. "I only wished that I had the courage to ask you sooner."

"There have been many things on my mind, Kiyoshi. A lot of things..." Shizuru sighed. "I suppose it is just life. There are times when you have absolutely no control over it. I see you as a friend, not just a servant. If Midori is my right hand, you are my left. I need you to be strong."

Slowly nodding, Kiyoshi kept his gaze on the floor. "Is… Is it a possible kind of love?" His tone was soft, his gaze dimmed in a subtle dejection.

Shizuru moved to lift the curtain up, glancing out to the sea. The yellow light shone over her peaceful face, but her gaze reddened like dark fire. "Unfortunately, I am prone to pick the bad choice more often than not."

Kiyoshi frowned. "So you will not marry him?"

Cuddling in Shizuru's clothes, Natsuki sniffed a little. The lavender scent fumed up out of the blue, and began to fill the whole suitcase. She covered her nose with both hands as to stop herself from coughing, but it quickly suffocated her.

_What the—_

"Aaaaaah-chooooo!" Natsuki couldn't help it. She froze, her eyes widened.

"Who is there!" Kiyoshi moved to the suitcase and lifted the lid open. His hand already on the hilt of his sword, he stopped in bewilderment to see Natsuki cuddling among Shizuru's shuffled clothes.

"Ah… Hey…" Natsuki gradually sat up, slowly raising both hands. "I didn't mean to eavesdrop, I swear."

Staring at Natsuki, Shizuru looked equally startled. "What were you doing, hiding in there?"

Natsuki made a face, clinging to the edge of the case. "You left without a word. How could you do that to me? How was I supposed to stay at the mansion _with_ Midori?"

Kiyoshi turned to Shizuru, his gaze darkened. "Should we turn around and send her back to Fuuka?"

For a moment, Shizuru kept quiet, contemplating. "Leave us."

He opened his mouth to protest, but words would not come out when Shizuru had made no second order. "Yes, master." He bowed, and reluctantly left the private compartment.

Now that they were alone, Natsuki climbed out of the suitcase and closed down the lid. She gave Shizuru a dry smile as she sat down opposite to the girl. "I'm really sorry. I didn't mean to tag along, but—"

"Did you hear everything?" Shizuru stared straight at the raven-haired woman.

Natsuki cast her gaze down on the floor, shifting on her heels. "Well… Believe me. I don't care who you date or—dated. It's really none of my business. I… I was trying to find you after Midori told me that you were leaving, but your men came into your room before I could do anything, so I had to hide in the suitcase."

Shizuru shook her head. "I do not know what you truly want, Natsuki, and I do not want to presume anymore. I am tired of this—"

"I know how this looks, but I'm not spying on you, I swear! I just wanted to talk to you… that's all."

At Natsuki's earnest tone, Shizuru stopped, and her gaze softened. "I suppose I have become accustomed to your _sudden_ appearances here and there. What is it then?"

Natsuki moved closer to the girl, her eyes widened in anticipation. "I remember about last night now. I—I saw her. I saw the spirit. She was an old woman with silver, long hair. Maybe you were right. It could have been the writer after all."

Shizuru frowned. Natsuki had her full attention now.

"Last night, she was trying to show me something." Natsuki paused as thoughts and doubts began to cross her mind. What would Shizuru do if she told her the truth?

"Well, what did you see?" Shizuru asked, bending forwards.

"She was… She was digging to hide something, but I couldn't see what it was."

Shizuru sat back, and remained silent for a while. "I never told anyone this since my father would be worried sick… but I saw her once when I was a child, the time I was lost in the woods. She appeared as you described, Natsuki. Frail. Old. Lonely… She led me into the woods. I would have lost her fast pace if it were not her lavender scent. I caught up with her, and she began to dig into the earth. Her back was facing me, so I could not see clearly. That was the only time I saw her."

_So I am not the only one, aren't I…?_

"The scent…" Natsuki held her breath. "I smelled it ever since I was a kid. I even smelled it in this world from time to time… I smelled it from you, too."

"Me?" Shizuru raised her brows. She then lifted her arm and sniffed a little. "I do not wear such perfume."

Natsuki chuckled at Shizuru's casual demeanor. "Yeah, the scent came when I least expected it. It's always like that. Like some magic."

Shizuru sighed. "Magic or not, Natsuki, you have to decide now what to do next. We are reaching the harbor of Matsue soon, and we are heading to the Capital by carriages. I cannot bring you to the Imperial Palace. It is no place for a commoner like you."

"You're worried that I might expose you?"

"Lying to the emperor would guarantee you death penalty. I cannot take any risks."

Natsuki sat unmoving at the seriousness of Shizuru's concern. She couldn't possibly go back to Fuuka Island all by herself, and she wouldn't know how to live in this weird, ancient Japan all by herself either. She had neither money nor friends here, and Shizuru seemed to be her only chance of survival.

"Oh, I know what to do!" Natsuki snapped her fingers. She crawled towards the suitcase and lifted up the lid. She fumbled for the suitable garment, and she beamed in delight when she found it. She picked the spare, black hat out of the pile of clothes and wore it. Grinning, she turned to Shizuru. "Then I'll masquerade like you do, so you don't have to worry, because we're even now."

Shizuru's mouth gaped in doubt, but a smile gradually appeared on her face instead. "You could actually pass as a handsome, young man, Natsuki."

The compliment came abrupt. Blushing, Natsuki quickly pulled her hat off.

"What are you planning to do in Kyoto?" Shizuru asked coolly.

The question left Natsuki in a deep thought. She crawled towards the curtains and lifted it up. The sky had turned dark now, and she could see countless stars adorning the vast, black plane. What was waiting for her in Kyoto? She was both scared and curious to know. She studied the starry sky and smiled. "I will try to find the answer why we're here."

"_We_?"

Shizuru's word kept echoing in her head.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Thank you all for dropping by this story, my other stories, and my DA. I read all the comments ^^**


	12. C12: Fly Away

**Chapter 12: Fly Away**

Natsuki opened her eyes and glanced around the carriage's compartment. She was stirred by the wobbly movements along the graveled road. Warmed, she was cuddled in a blanket Shizuru had prepared for her last night. Gradually, she looked up at the girl next to her.

Shizuru was already awake. With her hat off, her chestnut tresses draped down to her slim shoulders. She covered her mouth as she yawned. "Good morning, Natsuki."

"M—morning…" Natsuki sat up and pulled her collar closer, suddenly aware of how close they had been. Looking around, she reminded herself where she was, and what had transpired yesterday. In all honesty, she still couldn't believe that Shizuru not only didn't punish her for her feat, but also had allowed her to tag along. She wouldn't exactly know what to think of Shizuru's growing trust on her. A stranger's kindness had always been difficult for her to take.

"We will stop by Ihara farm. We could take a bath and have lunch there before we continue our trip."

"Is the farm yours?" Natsuki asked.

"No. Ihara Michiko is my aunt. She is the oldest of my mother's nine siblings."

Natsuki chuckled. "Your kind doesn't look like you could live in a farm."

Shizuru slightly looked down. "Against my grandfather's will, she married one of the guards, and because of that, she was cut off from the Fujiwara family. But my mother has kept in touch with her, and brought me to visit her from time to time."

"Ah, poor woman. No one should have to go through something like that. They should love whoever they want." Natsuki lifted the curtain up a little to see the vast plane of green, paddy fields along the path. Mountains stood in the backdrop, surrounding the fields like a great wall. The cool air was extremely refreshing, and Natsuki smiled to greet the new morning. She only stopped smiling when she turned to see Shizuru watching her. Involuntarily, she blushed at the unexpected attention.

"Such an idea of freedom is unheard of. I must admit that I am now deeply curious of what your world is like." Shizuru's gaze lowered a little as she said, "How wonderful it would be."

Natsuki watched Shizuru for a long moment, trying to decipher the meaning of the girl's contemplative gaze. "Not always. Everything comes with a price."

Shizuru looked up. "I suppose nowhere is perfect then."

"Perfection is fiction."

Shizuru laughed heartily at the statement. However, it was her turn to look elsewhere as though she didn't want to agree, but failed to disagree.

* * *

><p>Ihara Michiko was everything Natsuki did not expect. A woman in her early fifties, Michiko was a head shorter than her niece. She was tanned and freckled, her shoulders thick. Dark gray hair adorned her sideburns. Her smile was wide and bright. It was the kind of smile that needed no permission, unlike the one Shizuru often wore. Her dark eyes were full of life and energy, and her thick brows curved nicely into smiley arcs. While Shizuru appeared every inch of the upper class species, Michiko was everything opposite to it.<p>

Shizuru and Natsuki got off the carriage and approached the wooden house in the middle of the vast fields. The guards were closely behind them.

"My Shizuru!" Michiko ran along the path towards her niece with open arms and gave her a big hug. Breaking from the embrace, she rubbed her niece's back and studied her face. "You have grown so pretty, my little girl, and you grow taller every time you visit me." The woman then turned to Natsuki. "Is this one of your close friends? I cannot possibly catch up with your playful behavior anymore!"

Shizuru raised her brows. "She… She is just a friend."

"It is a pleasure to meet you—uh—Lady—umm—Ihara…" Natsuki stuttered.

"I am a farmer. Call me, 'Michiko'," Michiko said, smiling.

Glancing back and forth between Shizuru and her own clothes, Natsuki assumed that Michiko knew about Shizuru's masquerade. It suggested how close Shizuru was to her aunt, so there was nothing Natsuki should be worried about. But something else had caught her attention, and she turned to Shizuru. "You don't seem like a _playful_ person to me… Are you?"

Shizuru bit her bottom lip and turned away. "I am hungry, Aunt Michiko. I miss your cooking."

"Of course! I have made some salty squids for you. The kitchen was very busy this morning."

Shizuru made a face. "Eh, but I prefer shrimps, or grilled fish."

"Anything you wish. We went fishing yesterday just for this. Come now!" Michiko quickly escorted her niece into the house, and the rest of them followed.

Natsuki chuckled at the sight. It was amusing to see Shizuru's childlike side in her Aunt's presence. Shizuru seemed to be able to surprise her at every turn, trying or not. Unlike no one else, there was just something about the girl that caught Natsuki's attention.

* * *

><p>Like a big family, Michiko invited everyone to join the large, low table for lunch, but Shizuru's guards hesitated at the kindness. The Fujiwara family was one of the most powerful people in Japan, and being a former member of it was rather intimidating. It was only until Shizuru insisted that they accepted her aunt's invitation, or they would be punished, that they finally gave in.<p>

Michiko and her husband, Ihara Taro, each were seated at each end of the table. Natsuki sat down next to Shizuru as the others began to take their seats. Kiyoshi took the spot opposite to Shizuru, while the girl kept her attention at the food on the table at all times.

After a warm bath, Natsuki and Shizuru had changed into light-colored kimonos. Sitting next to Shizuru, Natsuki couldn't help but notice how the girl ate and laughed more than she had been in the mansion. It seemed that Shizuru could relax and be herself a little more here.

Michiko turned to Natsuki. "You ought to eat more, Natsuki-chan. You keep staring at my little girl. You are going to pierce a hole into her face."

Shizuru looked up, and their gazes fleetingly met. Looking away, Natsuki coughed at the fish in her throat, pounding her chest a bit. Shizuru moved the teacup on the table to Natsuki's hand.

"T—th—thank… you…" Natsuki gulped down some tea.

Michiko picked a piece of grilled fish for Shizuru and continued, "How long have you known Shizuru? She has quite a few friends, but none like you."

Natsuki put the teacup down. "_None like me_? I hope that is a compliment."

Shizuru still kept a calm face as the conversation began to involve her 'friends'. "She is a… a distant friend. My friend's friend—"

Michiko nodded as she continued. "You do have strange complexion. Such beautiful eyes! Where are you from?"

"I came from the future." Her answer earned her laughs from around the table, and Natsuki bowed in response as if it were really just a joke. She then smirked at Shizuru, causing the girl to direct her gaze elsewhere.

"A mysterious girl. You will not reveal yourself so easily! I see why Shizuru has taken special interest in you enough to bring you here," Michiko said, grinning.

"I did not—" Shizuru started.

"My dear, but you have such a lovely friend. I am glad that you brought her here," Michiko said.

Natsuki slightly blushed, failing to explain how she got to join the trip without looking crazy. She wouldn't know what to make of Kiyoshi's stare from across the table, or why she should care either.

"She liked to appear uninvited and would not leave even if you asked her so. More like a nuisance than mystery, I would say," Shizuru corrected with a straight face.

Natsuki snapped, glaring to the noble girl. "You haven't seen it all. Not yet."

Shizuru put up a smile. "I cannot wait."

Taro laughed aloud. "I like your friend, Shizuru-chan. She has a sense of humor! I do not know where she is from, but 'The future' must be bright."

Smiling back at Taro, Natsuki bowed to the old man. When everyone else started to eat and talk to one another, she turned to Shizuru and huskily whispered, "I bet your other _friends_ are a bore."

Chewing, Shizuru still refused to look at Natsuki. "You cannot compare to them."

"Oh, tell me more about them. I'd love to know."

Shizuru stopped for a second before chuckling. "What is troubling you? That I called you a 'nuisance'?"

Natsuki perked her chin up. "No. I'm just curious if they're the same people who've given your boyfriend trouble."

At Natsuki's mocking wink, Shizuru stared straight at the raven-haired woman. "Are you threatening me with my secret?"

"I didn't know it's considered a secret. Your aunt gave me the impression that you weren't exactly being secretive about your love life."

Shizuru shook her head. "You are unbelievable."

Natsuki sharply looked away and gobbled some more food. She couldn't exactly pinpoint what was bothering her, and she decided that she should stop talking before things got out of hand.

* * *

><p>It was well into the afternoon, and Natsuki still found herself at the Ihara farm. The plan to leave after lunch had been postponed. Shizuru had given in to her aunt's plea to spend a night here. They had prepared her a small, clean room in the east section of the house. It was very quiet and private, so much so that she wondered where the others had been.<p>

Shizuru had quickly left the table after lunch and had gone around the farm with Michiko. Natsuki wouldn't be surprised at all if she woke up tomorrow to find that she had been left behind. But what worried her even more was the sight of Shizuru's few suitcases arranged into the corner of the room. Michiko's house wasn't half as big as the Fujino mansion, and thus the room must be shared. She contemplated several times if she should start searching for _the_ mysterious box hidden inside a suitcase somewhere, but finally decided against it. She didn't want to be caught in the act.

_She might kick me out, kill me, cook me, or—err… Urgh, whatever…_

Natsuki brushed the thoughts away. Eventually, she couldn't stand the quietness around her anymore. She walked out of her room, put on her geta and trekked along the narrow road along the paddy fields. The long path led to the woods near the mountains.

She looked around and, from a distance, spotted Shizuru and Michiko riding on their horses. They seemed to have a good time together as the others were working around the farm. Natsuki smiled at the sight, and continued the walk further, enjoying the quiet time by herself.

Further away from the farm, she found herself drawn to the thick forest ahead. The air in her lungs was cold, and she had never felt as light in her own world. As she trekked deeper into the beauty of nature, the thought of her father came across her mind. Although she had tried to adapt herself to the new surroundings, it was still hard to believe that she would never ever see her father and friends again. She wouldn't have to go to the classes she used to complain about a thousand times over, but now longed to hear the bell ringing at the end of the class. As she felt the soft soil underneath her geta each step she took, she sorely missed the sound of engine the moment her favorite Ducati roared into life. It broke her heart to remind herself that she would never get to kiss her father goodnight again.

Her feet kept moving, taking her away from all that she could feel, touch and taste in this world. She wanted to leave. She wanted to run away, but she didn't know where to. Eventually, a sigh escaped her lips, and she brushed the tears away from her eyes.

"Ah—shit—!"

Her mind preoccupied, Natsuki had slipped and fallen into a deep swamp. She quickly kicked up and resurfaced, her geta lost to the cold water below. Her head popped up above the water.

"Ahhh…!"

_Man, stupid! I should have watched the way!_

She swam towards the bank, and tried to push herself up. But the slippery duckweed gave her a hard time, and she kept slipping back into the water. She tried to calm down and stilled her breathing as the cold water rapidly numbed her limbs.

"What are you doing?"

Natsuki's head shot up, and she saw Kiyoshi standing by the bank. He was staring down at her with suspicion.

"Swimming, maybe?" Natsuki sneered.

He crossed his arms across his wide chest, his face grimaced. "I cannot understand why Shizuru trusted you enough to let you out of the island. Who are you? What do you want?"

Natsuki had to admit that she disliked how possessive Kiyoshi sounded every time he called Shizuru by her first name. Perhaps, it was the fact that anyone with a rational mind knew that their love was impossible, everyone but him.

"I never meant anyone harm," she said. She tried her best to give the most amiable answer. "I was lost in the woods and found the Fujino mansion. Seriously, I didn't know anything about the Fujino family. I want to go home, but I just don't know how."

A moment of silence passed, and he let out a sigh. "I have no reason to believe you, but if Shizuru allowed you to come along, then so be it. But you should know that I will be watching you. If you ever hurt her in any way, you will pay for it. I have no rules or gods to believe in. You will suffer, understood?"

Natsuki briefly shut her eyes. She absolutely despised threats, but she just slightly nodded in response as she couldn't feel her legs anymore. She took his hand the moment he reached out, pulling her out of the water.

Her body shaken, Natsuki slowly stood up, hugging herself. "Thanks…" she muttered, her lips quivering.

"It was for her. You are her friend. For now."

Natsuki squinted up at Kiyoshi, but they both halted when they heard the sound of galloping approaching.

Michiko, on her white horse, rode towards the swamp, her face filled with worry. "Are you all right, Natsuki-chan?"

"I—I'm fine. It's just—I—I slipped."

On the black horse, Shizuru eventually caught up with her aunt. She frowned at the duckweed all over Natsuki's head and body.

"You must be freezing! Now, go back to the house and take a warm bath before you catch a cold," Michiko said.

Natsuki shakily nodded, but stopped when Shizuru swiftly rode away without a word. Inwardly grumbling, she wished that she could throw a rock at the girl for turning a cold shoulder at her. She had done nothing wrong, and it was all Michiko's fault for keep mentioning about Shizuru's friends at lunch.

_Stupid. Stupid. Stooopid…_

* * *

><p>The warm bath turned into a long, hot bath. Natsuki felt so much better after almost an hour in the steamy bathtub. After the bath, she put on a jade-colored kimono. Her wet, raven hair hanging loose to her back, she sat along the wooden passageway in front of her room. The view offered the sun setting fast below the vast, green fields.<p>

Taking a deep breath in, she hung her slender legs down, swinging them lightly to feel the cool air. Her mind was at ease as she watched the sky turning into dark blue. The stars began to appear, and the glittering sight mesmerized her. She was sure that she couldn't find a heavenly sight like this in her own world. Sometimes she was still convinced that she was in a dream of a dream, in which she would never wake up.

"The night is cold. You should be careful, or you might catch a fever again."

Natsuki turned at the voice and found Shizuru approaching her. She could only sit still as Shizuru knelt down and put a navy-colored kimono over her shoulders. "Thank… Thank you…" They had not talked since lunchtime, and Shizuru had been avoiding her until now. It did question her if she had gone too far by mentioning Kiyoshi's past relationship with the girl.

Natsuki glanced at the girl. "Do you mind?"

"Pardon?"

Natsuki gestured at the suitcases inside the room. "They put me here, but I could sleep somewhere else."

Shizuru briefly glanced at the suitcases, but said nothing. Natsuki didn't know what Shizuru's silence meant, but she didn't dare to move as not to stir another misunderstanding. After what happened today, she could only hope for a little moment of peace between them now. She averted her gaze from the girl, looking down at her feet. She had never cared what anyone thought or felt, and this had become something totally new to her.

Shizuru then sat down and looked out at the fields. For a long moment, they both just embraced the peacefulness around them. The light air and the smell of grass seemed to envelop them, separating them from the rest of the world.

"It's nice to see how close you're to your aunt. You seem… different here," Natsuki mumbled. She wanted to make it a positive statement, but she wasn't sure how Shizuru would interpret it. To her relief, Shizuru giggled.

"I suppose that it was why my mother often took me here. She knew what it is like to be a Fujiwara, and it is a little more complicated to be both a Fujiwara and a Fujino. I am thankful that she tried to lead me here."

Natsuki studied the calm, easy smile on Shizuru's lips. "When will your father free you from this charade?"

"As soon as Eiji agrees to marry one of the girls he found for him. It will be the time I could fly away."

"I guess you're just like your aunt. She's brave. A really brave one, I mean it."

Shizuru slightly nodded. "She has done extraordinary things. She is just a farmer, but everyone in the province knows her. She is very generous and hard working."

"And because she decided to love the one she truly wanted?"

Shizuru laughed. "For her, yes. But love does not mean much, at least not for the people of my class. We have too many responsibilities to maintain."

Natsuki sighed. "Responsibilities. Right."

"You never had one?" Shizuru smiled.

"I live for myself. I mean, I love my dad, but ultimately, we all have to live for ourselves. Just like your aunt. She did the right thing, and she's happy, isn't she?"

Shizuru's smile faded as she watched the stars above. "You both make it seem easy… so easy…"

"Life is a lot less complicated if you make it so." Natsuki mildly shrugged.

Shizuru chuckled. "I suppose I will have to learn from you sometimes."

The first real smile graced Natsuki's lips. She couldn't recall the last time she smiled so widely that her cheeks hurt. "Well, everything will go back to normal after Eiji marries."

Shizuru leaned a little closer to Natsuki. "Of course, Fujino Shizuru is so eager to leave her sick bed."

Natsuki had to look away at Shizuru's earnest smile. She only glanced back at Shizuru again when the girl took out a flute from under the layers of her kimonos.

Shizuru offered the flute to Natsuki. "Can you play something? Anything?"

Natsuki hesitated for a moment before she took the flute and pretended a frown. "Do you always court your _friends_ with art? It's a very old trick."

Shizuru sat back, resting back on her elbows against the cool floor. Once again, she looked up at the dark sky. "Amuse me, Natsuki."

Clutching the flute, Natsuki raised the flute to her lips, but stopped. She didn't know what to play, yet her heart had always longed for a song to be sung. Briefly closing her eyes, she then played something Shizuru had never heard of. She played something she had never thought of herself before. As the music began to accompany the cold night, they could only dream of the day they could fly away to the place they longed for.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Thank you all for dropping by :)**


	13. C13: Too Close to See

**Chapter 13: Too Close to See**

It was almost noon, and the scenery outside the carriage's window gradually transformed from green hills to graveled roads and small bridges. The sounds of bird chirping, the blades of grass rustling in the wind eventually turned into chatters and shouts along the way. A few temples in the backdrop slid into view, and the city became more crowded with houses and taller buildings. Excitement suddenly filled Natsuki, and she lifted the screen up to get a clearer look.

"Whoooa… I can't believe this…" she muttered in awe.

She was wide-eyed as she watched the packed streets in the Capital. It was as though she was thrown into a movie set, seeing Kyoto fully covered with traditional houses and buildings. Among the villagers and commoners, the upper-class stood out with their makeup and neat, colorful clothes. They strode along, their servants trailing behind. Carriages passed one another like an unruly cobweb. People were shouting a language she knew, yet it seemed so alien to her. Everything appeared so new and vibrant. It looked very different from the Kyoto from her time.

Then a carriage passed, leaving only a few inches to Natsuki's window. With the screen rolled up, Natsuki could see three young women in the carriage. Well-dressed, they all raised their fans up, and giggled to one another as they glanced at her. Quickly, she brushed her cheeks with the back of her hands, wondering if her face was tainted with something. She only looked up again when Shizuru quietly pulled the screen down.

Natsuki frowned. "Is there something on my face?"

"A pair of eyes, maybe?" Chuckling, Shizuru sat back to her spot opposite to Natsuki. "Please try not to attract too much attention. It should keep our lives simpler."

Adjusting the black hat on her head, Natsuki sighed. She almost forgot that she was already dressed up as a man in her dark-green kariginu. "Stop making it sound like I'm an unwanted, an extra luggage you have to carry. It's not my fault. They just started laughing at me for no reason."

Shizuru raised her brows as she looked away. "There is always a reason," she mumbled.

"What?" Natsuki pulled the collars down a little more. With the heavy layers of clothes, it started to get itchy and too warm for her liking. "Man, this is—it's suffocating me… Urgh…"

Shizuru moved to sit in front of Natsuki and helped adjusting her clothes. "Wear them down a little… like this… yes…"

The girl's breath caressed her nose, and Natsuki stopped. Her gaze dropped to the base of Shizuru's slender neck, and her thoughts drifted away from the inconvenience of her own clothes. She pondered how soft Shizuru's snowy skin must have felt, and she frowned at the sudden, peculiar thought that she shook her head a few times.

"Did I hurt you?" Shizuru instantly let go off Natsuki's collars.

Natsuki leaned back slightly to leave some space between them. "Nn—no. It's just… I'm a little… nervous. What if someone found out that I'm a woman?"

"Do not get caught. After all, it was your idea." Shizuru let out a sigh.

Natsuki studied the chestnut-haired girl for a moment. "It's a big risk. Why did you trust to bring me here with you?"

"I suppose that you already knew too much."

Natsuki rolled her eyes. "You could have just locked me up in the mansion, or take Midori's advice."

"Are you begging me to kill you now?" Shizuru chortled.

"Hey, I'm serious." Natsuki had to admit that she was startled to find the ancient Kyoto so lively. She wasn't sure how well she could hold up her masquerade. What she wanted now was a reassurance that she could follow Shizuru's footstep. How on earth could the girl fool people for years?

Shizuru glanced out through the window screen, and both of them were enveloped in this bizarre silence, veiled away from the busy world outside. "I bring you along because I simply enjoy your company."

Natsuki blinked a few times as she had expected a vague answer from someone as reserved as Shizuru.

"I had such a strange hope the first time I saw you. You came out of nowhere, a complete stranger to my world. For some very odd reasons, I thought you might know about the old notebook." Smiling, Shizuru lowered her gaze to the tatami-floor. "I may never know why you are here, why you suddenly appeared, but it actually is quite all right. Sometimes we just would never find the answers we search for. Sometimes it is meant to be."

Hearing Shizuru's resignation taunted Natsuki's will to find the true reason she was here. Frustration then clouded her mind. Shizuru could be the very reason she was drawn to this place, or the girl could be just the beginning of her journey in this world, nothing more. Something must have called out to her. It had been waiting for her, and it would emerge, but she just couldn't tell what it was, or when.

Shizuru lightly gestured in the air, her face grim. "I brought you with me, because I knew that you wanted to leave Fuuka. Kyoto would probably be the best place for you to start your journey back home, wherever it is. You do not owe me anything, Natsuki. You are free to leave anytime you wish."

Natsuki tried to breathe as slowly as possible. "You… You're willing to let me go? You don't think I'd expose you?"

Shizuru smiled. "Even if I locked you up somewhere remote, you would have tried every way possible to escape. Am I right?"

Natsuki sat motionless for a long moment. She could hear the loud chattering outside, luring her out to freedom. A few weeks ago, she would have jumped off the carriage without second thought, but now she wasn't sure what was chaining her to the spot. She didn't know where to go, or who else to rely on. It would have been a totally different situation if it was her world, but here posted new threats and challenges at the same time.

"Only time can prove to you that I have nothing to turn against you… No, I don't want to go. I want to find out what it really is that led us here… together." The moment those words slipped through her lips, Natsuki couldn't believe it herself. It had been all about logics and actions all through her life, and this was one time that she depended solely on faith. The truth scared her more than she could admit.

Shizuru lifted the screen up a bit and said to her guards, "Halt. We would take a walk." When the carriage stopped, she turned to Natsuki. Grinning, she grabbed Natsuki's hand.

"What—wait—why are we stopping?" Natsuki clumsily hopped down the carriage. Shizuru's grip was firm, yet gentle. It soothed the awkwardness, which had quickly become overwhelming in this crowded street.

Natsuki wrinkled her nose as the smell of lavender washed through her like a restful wave of warm sea. Her mind soon ignored all the commotions in the market, and she fixed her gaze upon the taller figure in front of her. Squinting, she took in the tiny details of the milky skin, the chestnut hair that was giving out a lovely contrast against the black hat Shizuru was wearing. The lavender scent did not alarm or scare her like it used to; it was now so light and soothing that it almost coalesced her into one with this new world. Perhaps, there was a reason why she had always felt unfit in her own world. Perhaps, this was where she truly belonged.

Natsuki clutched back the hand in hers, and the pressure stopped Shizuru. The girl turned around to look at Natsuki quizzically. It took them a moment of silence in the midst of noisy chatters until Shizuru said, "You are not scared, are you?"

Natsuki couldn't find a proper answer to the question, so she just shook her head a little, a smile gracing her lips. "I'm just a bit amazed."

"What amazed you?"

"This world… _Your_ world." Natsuki chuckled. "I've never imagined myself walking this path. It's totally new and strange to me. I'm lost, but I can't deny that I'm—well… I'm excited."

Smiling back, Shizuru tightened the grip on Natsuki's hand. "Are you hungry? I know I am."

In the bright sun, Natsuki could only follow the girl's lead. Almost blindly, she quickened her steps to catch up with Shizuru's fast, confident pace. They eventually stopped in front of a noodles stall, and Shizuru ordered two bowls of ramen for them.

"Fujino-sama! It is an immense pleasure to see you again. Two bowls of ramen right away." The middle-aged owner greeted Shizuru with a bright smile.

Natsuki looked around, thrilled to be in the middle of the crowd. The people's colorful clothes brightened in the sun like a vast field of blossoming flowers. Their smiles and quick paces gave life to the old city. Many bowed as they passed Shizuru, acknowledging her presence. Quite a number of daring, young women gave Shizuru a shy, yet enticing smile behind their fans as they passed by. Several glanced her way with a stunned, but also interested look. From what she gathered, 'Fujino Eiji' must have been quite a fancy figure in the Capital.

"This is for you." Shizuru paid for the meal and handed a bowl of ramen to Natsuki.

"Thank you." Natsuki grinned as she began to eat. "Hmm—oh, it's so good!"

Shizuru laughed heartily, and they both took their time to finish their lunch. They watched people passing by as the sunshine graced them with warmth and enthusiasm. After the meal, they strolled along the street. Natsuki took in a few deep breaths, contented with the fresh air. She must have squeezed Shizuru's hand tighter without realizing it, but the girl didn't complain and squeezed her hand back in reassurance.

Then Shizuru stopped at a bracelets stall. Her gaze examined all the items on the small stand, contemplating. "My family has a tradition of giving out a bracelet to the one you would marry… I have not found mine," she murmured.

Natsuki kept quiet for a second. The historical pair of bracelets must have really existed, and she still couldn't quite believe that she was here, having the chance to see them firsthand. However, the pair belonged to Eiji, and Natsuki could somewhat understand how Shizuru felt the need to find her own.

"Hmm, this looks nice." Shizuru picked up a bracelet and studied it. It was a pretty bracelet with a few colorful stones strung along the tightly weaved, cotton threads. It looked too simple for someone of Shizuru's status, and it amused Natsuki that the girl seemed to really like it.

Natsuki took a step closer to her. "Yeah, it's cute. But I guess what more important than the tradition is whom you give it to."

After a moment of silence, Shizuru put the bracelet back in its place. "Ara, it is not my place to give a bracelet to anyone. The tradition carries on only through the firstborn sons."

Nodding, Natsuki looked elsewhere. It was only natural for Shizuru to compare herself to Eiji. Not only she had to live the life for her brother, she didn't get to pick the one who was truly worthy of her family's bracelet. Natsuki knew that she wouldn't be able to sacrifice that much for anyone else, and she could only wish that Shizuru would walk her own path one day.

Involuntarily, Natsuki's head shot up. "You know what happened. I mean… this is gonna sound absolutely crazy, but… in my world, the ruby bracelet was lost almost a thousand year ago. They never found it again. So, really, it doesn't mean anything. Even if it was lost, life still went on. It was just a thing. Only the people's heart that couldn't let it go."

Shizuru froze for a long moment before she said, "I have never shown you what the bracelets look like. How did you know one of them is ruby?"

Natsuki mentally slapped herself. "Uh… I told you that it sounds crazy. But I really… really came from another world. I live in the time that the ruby bracelet was lost forever—"

Shizuru gripped Natsuki's arm. "How did you know? Tell me the truth."

"Hey, it hurts—"

"Fujino Eiji, isn't it?" A call interrupted, and they both turned at the voice.

A woman in her early thirties approached them, her dark gaze darting between them. She was tall, considered above the average height of Japanese women here, a few inches taller than Shizuru even. She was in a navy-colored kimono, adorned with patterned, golden flowers, looking regal with colorful layers of her collars that accentuated her pale, delicate skin. Her red lips then broke into a thin smile. She was absolutely stunning, but Natsuki found something devious behind the woman's smile.

"It is nice to see you again. You have been avoiding me the past months," the woman said.

Letting go of Natsuki, Shizuru glanced around a little. "I have been busy with father's businesses. It is a pleasure to see you again, Lady Kitahara."

"Months of absence have distanced us. I would not mind if you continue to call me 'Hina'. Not at all."

Shizuru cleared her throat. "That is very kind of you, Lady Kitahara."

Hina then glanced at Natsuki, her smile intact. "I see you have got a new friend." She eyed Natsuki up and down. Her gaze was nothing friendly, and it clearly hinted their difference in social status. "Quite a handsome young man. What is your name?"

Natsuki inwardly growled. "My name is Kruger—"

"Kuga N—Nobuyuki," Shizuru interrupted. "He is Midori's new servant, so I allowed him to come in place of her. He is from a village in Dewa."

"Dewa…?" Hina looked away as though where Natsuki had supposedly come from was unworthy of mentioning. She took a step closer to Shizuru and whispered into the girl's ear. "I do not know or care how many friends you have, but avoiding me will not change anything, Shizuru. We have an agreement… Do not desert me…"

Natsuki paused. The woman knew of Shizuru's true identity, and it appeared that they both had a murky history together. One thing for certain, Hina wasn't the one injuring Shizuru on the arm since the wound was received only recently. Natsuki couldn't help but sigh. It seemed that Shizuru had such a complicated life in Kyoto, and it wasn't going to be easy to keep her out of trouble.

Hina stepped back and turned to slightly nodded at the two ladies standing behind her. "I will see you around, Eiji-san. Have a nice day."

Shizuru bowed. "Lady Kitahara."

When the woman and her maids left, Natsuki turned to Shizuru. "What's this? She knew about Eiji? What's going on? Who is she?"

Shizuru put up a dry smile. "Do you like the name? Kuga Nobuyuki. It just happened to pop up in my head—"

Natsuki grabbed Shizuru's hand and squeezed it. "Shizuru," she stressed. The name came out in a whisper, but her tone was resolute.

Shizuru lowered her gaze to the ground for a second, and looked up to stare into Natsuki's eyes. "There is no secret in the world. It is just sometimes people are too close to see, or maybe they just pretend that they did not see it."

Natsuki stared at the pale face in front of her. She could see traces of regrets behind the mask of youthful innocence. It was such an angelic face that she wasn't sure if she was too close to see the whole truth behind it.

* * *

><p><strong>AN 1:** Thank you all for reviewing this ^_^ And thank you to those who left reviews for other stories, especially 'Whisper from the Forest'. It meant such a lot to me. I read them all. Thanks!

**A/N 2:** To answer a question from last chapter Shizuru is 17, Natsuki is 20 in this story.


	14. C14: One

**Chapter 14: One**

In her light blue kariginu, Shizuru sat down and leaned back against the shoji door. She had just taken a bath after a long journey to Kyoto and changed into her fresh clothes. Although the bath had refreshed her to some extent, her mind was heavy with many thoughts that she did not know where to begin. Holding the black hat in her left hand, she studied it a bit, wondering how long she had been wearing it.

It began when she was twelve, and Eiji was thirteen. He was poisoned and nearly died, so she had to take his role instead. Many things had happened since, and Midori had been the only reminder of her childhood innocence. However, those ingenuous days were fading fast in the world she was living in now. While a part of her wished to give out the bracelet and be done with it, another part doubted how she could ever get back to her own life without fears and regrets.

It all depended on when Eiji would agree to marry, but it didn't seem likely anytime soon.

_The bracelets… How did Natsuki know about them?_

Shizuru grimaced. There was just one too many peculiar things about Natsuki. The woman appeared in Fuuka mansion without the guards' knowing, and she knew about the bracelets before. What Natsuki said about the ruby bracelet being lost a thousand years from now sounded absolutely insane. If it had been someone else speaking of such a thing, she would have been alarmed and offended, and she would have her guards take the person away. Yet, Natsuki had seemed true about her history and where she came from. There was just an honest, harmless air about her that Shizuru couldn't deny—something she rarely found among her acquaintances.

At the thought of the bracelets, Shizuru moved towards the cabinet in the corner. Her maids had already unpacked her belongings and arranged them in places. She found the wooden box and picked it up. Carefully, she opened the lid and studied the pair of bracelets wrapped by a piece of beautiful, crimson silk. She let out a sigh of relief; they were safe in her hands. Although she didn't want to believe what Natsuki said, it did scare her at the thought of losing them. They were her family's treasure, and she must guard them with her life.

Putting the box back into the cabinet, Shizuru stood up and adjust her clothes a bit. She wanted to go out for a walk, but the thought of Natsuki in the room next to hers came across her mind. Biting her bottom lip, Shizuru looked down to her feet, blushing at the thought. Natsuki had become a constant distraction for her these days, and she didn't like the idea one bit. She had hoped that Natsuki could solve the riddle about the old notebook, which had 'Fujino Shizuru' mentioned in various parts of it. She had never believed herself to be the same 'Shizuru' in the notebook until Natsuki showed up and claimed to have come from another place, another world altogether. The whole idea seemed immensely absurd, but mysteriously alluring at the same time. She had waited for the person in question for a long time: a foreigner who wrote it, the one who swore to come back—the one who promised forever love.

Shizuru kept reminding herself that it was only about the notebook, nothing more. She put on the black hat and turned to the shoji door. As if on cue, the door slid open to reveal a young maid sitting on her heels along the corridor.

The maid had long, dark-brown hair, and her eyes gleamed in delight to see her master back in Kyoto. The sixteen-year-old Senou Aoi had been one of only a few maids in Kyoto Shizuru trusted enough to let her watch her room.

"Shizuru-sama, the carriage is ready."

"Thank you, Aoi."

Shizuru walked into the corridor. After a few steps, she halted and turned to face the door to Natsuki's room. She raised her hand to the door, but stopped. Natsuki's voice rang inside the room, presumably chatting with some maids, who were helping her with her new clothes.

Shizuru lowered her hand to her side and turned to Aoi. "Do not let her wander off too far. Oh, and… she can be a bit… tricky."

Aoi beamed. "I will keep an eye on her. Don't worry, Shizuru-sama."

* * *

><p>"Five gold coins if you could hit the bullseye."<p>

"Such an insult. I will leave you strapped today."

Shizuru stood along the long, open passageway of the east wing of Kanzaki mansion, watching two men conversing in the middle of the vast backyard. A hay-made target stood eighty meters away, while a number of arrows had plunged roughly on the ground around the target. Only a few arrows had made their ways to the target, but none were close to the center.

Takeda Masashi, the sole heir to the Takeda family, drew the bow and sent the arrow towards the target. It hit the outer ring again, and the maids standing behind Shizuru couldn't help but giggled. Perhaps, they had seen too many fruitless attempts today.

"What is so funny?" Takeda sharply turned around. His face screwed into even deeper discontent when he saw Shizuru there. "Oh, it is you again, Fujino! You laughed at me. I would like to see how well you could shoot."

"I was not laughing at you. Not at all," Shizuru replied, her tone light and simple. She really wasn't.

"You have returned, Eiji!" Kanzaki Reito rushed towards the passageway. "You left Kyoto without a word. I was worried if I had offended you in any way. It is good to see you back so soon."

Shizuru smiled. She was holding a ceramic bowl of boiled peas. The maids here knew her well as she was a close friend to Reito, and they always served her with hot green tea and peas whenever she visited, knowing they were her favorite choices of snacks. "I had an errand to settle. I am sorry that I did not bid you farewell last time. But now I am back," she said, popping a pea into her mouth and chewing.

"Do not change the subject, Fujino. Ten gold coins if you hit the target at all!" Takeda stood firmly next to Reito, clenching his fists.

Shizuru put the bowl down on the wooden handrail, and the maids turned their smiling faces away. She was never the best archer in town, but she accepted the challenge by walking down the corridor to join them in the backyard. In fact, she wasn't that athletic as her father was overly protective of her ever since Eiji's incident, but she had Midori teach her a few things just to get by. Today seemed to be one of those days she needed Midori's lessons.

Reito handed her a bow and an arrow. Smiling, he whispered in her ears, "Ten!"

Chuckling, Shizuru took the equipment and walked to the spot. Taking a deep breath in, she drew the bow and paused. She clenched the wooden bow in her left hand so hard that her arm ached. Her gaze watched the target, but her mind was elsewhere. She wasn't thinking about the ten gold coins waiting. She wasn't thinking about upsetting Takeda, a competitor to her father's most wanted girl in Kyoto for Eiji. She wasn't thinking about anything—anyone, but to just let the arrow take flight and hasten into the sky to find its freedom.

"Whoa!" Reito laughed heartily when the arrow plunged down only an inch to the bullseye. "Ten gold coins!"

Shizuru lowered her arms down, watching the result wide-eyed. It was the first time she ever hit closest to the center. It was the first time she didn't think about winning for anyone, and the result took her by surprise.

"T—ten… Yeah…" Takeda mumbled, turning away from the sight.

Shizuru turned to Takeda. "It is just a game. You do not have to—"

"I always keep my word, Fujino Eiji. My men will deliver you ten gold coins today," Takeda said, and stalked off the backyard.

Chuckling, Reito moved closer to Shizuru. "What are you going to do with that much money? I know just the place."

Shizuru paused a second before she shook her head. "No, Reito, I—"

"Oh, do no deny it. You cannot fool me. I know everything you are thinking."

"Ara…" Shizuru titled her head to the side, chortling earnestly. Reito was, indeed, her best friend in Kyoto. He knew almost everything about her, only her true identity. She knew just where he would take her, only she wasn't sure if she wanted to be there this evening.

* * *

><p>Amaterasu Theater was in disarray after the show was over. Every night, the rich and powerful would wait to meet their favorite actors and actresses. Among their circle of friends, Reito was one of the frequent supporters of the theater. He took Shizuru to the backstage as he knew the theater's owner, watching all the girls undress in the private area.<p>

Many girls and boys sent their smiles and glances Shizuru's way, causing her to look away, holding a folded fan to her lips. It wasn't her first time backstage. She adored their beautiful looks. She would have watched them change their attires as usual, however, she wasn't herself tonight as she used to, and she didn't know why.

Before she knew it, she felt a presence next to her, a warm breath caressing her cheek.

"I would love if someone would see me back to my quarters."

Shizuru turned to see a beautiful face just an inch next to hers. "Keiko… Keiko-san…"

Keiko smiled lightly, pulling her collars closer. Her skin was snow white, and her lips were deep red. Without the heavy makeups on, she was even more beautiful with her delicate, facial features. The girl gave no heed to the sudden whispers and giggles behind them. It happened every time Shizuru talked to someone, and Keiko wanted to be the first to approach the visitor.

Shizuru lightly bowed. "Of course, my carriage is ready."

Their gazes locked for a moment before Keiko bowed in return.

Reito elbowed his friend, grinning. "You are fast. Have fun tonight."

Smiling lightly, Shizuru shook her head, and then gestured for Keiko to walk with her out of the theater.

* * *

><p>Keiko's residence was a two-story building, located on the outskirt of Kyoto. Only an extremely famous actress and singer like Hiyama Keiko could afford to live alone. Other performers would have to stay in a shared house owned by the theater, or other sponsors. At the age of nineteen, Keiko was considered strange for not being married yet as she had had several offers from powerful men from courts. She had a face and a voice of an angel. Being a special guest of Keiko earned Shizuru so much scorn from other men in her circle, but Keiko seemed to ignore all else whenever they were in each other's sight.<p>

Keiko had changed into a thin pink kimono, sitting on the tatami floor of her living room. As usual, she played her koto, sounding as heavenly as one could imagine, but Shizuru couldn't seem to register the tune in her mind. Not tonight.

All of a sudden, Keiko stopped. "Your mind is elsewhere. What is troubling you?"

A cup of sake, Shizuru looked up, gazing at the woman through the screen between them. Keiko seemed to read her better and better as time passed, and Shizuru wasn't sure how much the girl could see through her now. "You play beautifully. Please continue."

After a moment of dead silence, Keiko took her hands from the koto and rested them on her lap. "You were gone for a while, and I thought… I thought that I would never see you again," she whispered, her voice slightly shaken.

Shizuru looked away. She couldn't stand the weakness in Keiko's voice. "I needed to settle some business. I always come back, did I not?"

Keiko chortled, and Shizuru turned to look at her in surprise.

"From the first time we met, you have grown a lot, Eiji. You have changed so much."

Shizuru slowly poured another cup. "How so?"

Keiko shook her head almost in disbelief herself. "Your moves become subtler. Sometimes I cannot even hear you. You used to laugh a lot, but not so much for the past two years. You do not talk the way you used to."

"I have grown up. Naturally, there are many things I have to think about." Shizuru stopped as she thought back to what happened two years ago. Her life was never the same again, and she just didn't know how to get out of the mess.

"You have changed, but I cannot deny that I like it."

Raising her brows, Shizuru remained speechless. She didn't know if she should be glad or scared of Keiko's soft smile behind the screen. She wasn't Eiji, and she would never be. All she knew was that Keiko had been Eiji's friend since they were little. Her brother seemed to have been particularly fond of Keiko, and it wasn't hard for Shizuru to understand.

"You have touched me only twice, and that was years ago. I still miss those moments."

Shizuru nodded, pretending to know what Keiko was referring to. It must have been before Eiji was poisoned and was secretly sent back to Fuuka. "I… I miss them, too…" she muttered. She was still running and playing in the garden at the time Keiko mentioned. Back then, she only thought of the flying kites and colorful fish in the bowls. Time did not wait for anyone.

Keiko stood up and began to undress herself. One by one, all the layers of her kimono were stripped down to the floor, leaving her perfect body naked in the dim light of candles in the room. She stood motionlessly as she watched Shizuru.

Shizuru sat still for a moment before pouring herself another cup of sake. "What are you doing?" she asked calmly.

"You were not listening to my music tonight, so I am trying to get your attention. I am trying very hard," Keiko said, chuckling.

"You look beautiful, and you sound beautiful. Please continue to play." Keeping her gaze down, Shizuru washed down the sake in one gulp. There was just something so innocent and pure behind Keiko's seductive smile. Perhaps, they both had something to hide—something to look back and long for.

Keiko walked towards the screen, lifted it up and crossed into Shizuru's section of the room. She sat down next to the girl, fixing her gaze upon her. "I will always play for you, but not tonight. I want to feel you again."

Shizuru froze when Keiko reached out and grasped her hand. It was one of a few times they had physically touched each other throughout the past five years Shizuru had been masquerading as Eiji.

"Your hand is as soft as I remembered." Keiko held Shizuru's hand up to her cheek, kissing it. "But you have changed… You have…"

Shizuru fought every reason not to retract her hand from the woman. She now understood why Eiji refused to marry anyone father found for him. "I am still the boy you once knew," she said. She had forced out the words, keeping her tone as steady as she could remember.

"You would come to listen to my music, to see my performance, but you look frailer and sadder now. You have become someone I barely understand… but it has made me long for you even more." Her eyes closed, Keiko's smile was still intact on her beautiful lips as she clutched Shizuru's hand. "I poured out my music every night, and you could catch me whenever you wished. It has become easy for you, while it has become harder for me. I want to know what you are feeling. I want to _know_ the real you."

At that, Shizuru sharply took her hand back, leaving Keiko stunned. The girl was left naked and shamed as Shizuru looked away. "I am to marry someone else. I can never return your feelings."

Keiko took a moment to breathe and sigh. "I know. For someone of your status, I know my place. But you look pained, and I cannot stand it. Please let me in."

Shizuru laughed aloud, causing Keiko to watch her in a dazed amazement. Finishing her sake, she stood up and adjusted her clothes and hat. Smiling, she bowed to Keiko. "I am fine as it is. I shall take my leave now. Good night—"

"I cannot look away from you. It is funny, isn't it? Because I do not even know who you are anymore." Keiko stared up at Shizuru, unabashed and daring.

"I…" Shizuru's voice trailed off. She couldn't look away from Keiko either. "I do not know who I am anymore either."

Shizuru turned to the door and slid it open. Two maids bowed as she walked through the dark corridor. She hastened her pace towards the carriage waiting outside, suddenly feeling the urgency to rush away from here. As far as she understood, Keiko was in love with Eiji, but something about the girl seemed strange tonight. It was too dangerous for both of them, and she didn't trust herself to be strong enough.

* * *

><p>It was almost midnight when Shizuru returned to the Fujino mansion. She had her carriage riding along the streets for hours on end, not wanting to go home. She didn't want to go to Reito either as she couldn't possibly tell him what really was going on between Keiko and her. She couldn't tell anyone how she truly felt, and it had been years since she had begun to keep things to herself. As she grew older, the more secrets she must keep.<p>

Letting out a sigh, Shizuru tried to brush away all the thoughts. Fatigue began to overwhelm her. She got off the carriage and entered the building. Rubbing her face tiredly, she walked towards her room, but abruptly stopped in her tracks. The shoji door to Natsuki's room was dark. The woman must have been asleep already. She then turned away, meaning to leave Natsuki alone, but halted again.

"Natsuki… Natsuki…" Shizuru whispered as she lightly knocked.

Lowering her arms to her sides, Shizuru knew that she should go to bed and leave every thought and worry in her dream tonight. But she just stood there for a long moment, staring into nothingness. Her fists clenched and trembled, and she didn't know how to stop it. All the things that had been buried deep in her heart were going to burst tonight, and she couldn't fight it.

"Natsuki…" She slid the door open. She had expected to see Natsuki sleeping, but the futon seemed too tidy with the blankets folded neatly on top of it. She walked into the room, squinting in the dark. She knelt down and touched the bed. It was cold. Natsuki was gone for a long time now.

_Where did she go…?_

At the thought, she rushed out of the room and looked out into the corridor. Kiyoshi had just arrived, slightly panting.

He stopped when he saw her. "She was gone only shortly after you left. I have not seen her come back yet."

Shizuru froze. Blinking a few times, she felt a sharp hollow in her chest. Natsuki could be wandering in the streets and got lost, or she could be with her enemies. She could be with anyone, anywhere at the moment. Shizuru leaned back against the door, feeling a little winded. The worst case she could think of was that Natsuki could go back to where she came from, disappeared into thin air like how she appeared.

Exhausted, Shizuru slid to her knees and sat down along the corridor. Kiyoshi rushed to her side, frowning in worries. In silence, she felt comforted by his presence and his undying loyalty. They both kept quiet as they let minutes passed by. She just sighed, clasping her hands together as though she wanted to get a hold of something, but didn't know what. She didn't know what to do when she was torn between desire and duty. She didn't know if she wanted to consume this counterfeit identity or just be herself when she no longer had her own life. She just didn't know which path she should take when the past and the future seemed to shape into one. Only time, perhaps. Only time could tell.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Thanks all for the reviews. I've changed the POV in this chapter. Not sure if it's too weird. Anyway, if you think it should stay only on Natsuki's POV, drop me a word.


	15. C15: The Wrong One

**Chapter 15: The Wrong One**

Natsuki let out a deep breath after Shizuru's carriage left Keiko's house.

Crouching behind the bushes, she had watched the scene unfolded in the living room before her eyes, and she didn't know exactly what to think. Every time she followed Shizuru and watched her, there was a secret spilled like the trail of breadcrumbs in a haunted wood. Whether she truly wanted to know or not, she felt as though as she destined to follow the path. She just had to do it.

Aoi, Shizuru's trusted maid, was crouching beside her. "I told you not to come," the girl mumbled almost to herself, "If Shizuru-sama knew that I allowed you to come out of the mansion, she would have me punished. Not good. No, definitely not good."

Out of paranoia and boredom, Natsuki had decided to track Shizuru down. She waited outside Kanzaki mansion and caught up with Shizuru at the theater. She was curious about Shizuru's life in Kyoto, but never did she expect to see Shizuru and the singer in such an intimate situation. From what she had witnessed, she couldn't tell if Keiko was falling for Eiji, the boy she knew five years ago, or Shizuru, the one she had spent the past years with. If that was the case, she really felt sorry for the woman. How horrible it must be not to know whom one truly felt for?

What struck her even more was the possibility that Shizuru might feel the same way for the singer. There was no denying that Keiko was very beautiful, but considering how obedient Shizuru had been to her family, Natsuki wasn't sure if Shizuru was daring enough to harbor such a sentiment.

Natsuki watched Keiko putting on her clothes. The woman sat down again, placing her hand on the koto and gently caressing it. A sad look was prominent her eyes, and Natsuki could only tell who the source of the melancholy was.

_Shizuru… you could be so cruel without knowing it…_

"Hey, have you ever met Eiji-san?" Natsuki asked.

Aoi frowned as she recalled. "Only once. But it was five years ago. He moved back to the island, and I have not seen him since."

Natsuki just glanced at the maid. Aoi must have been assigned to serve in Kyoto only, and the girl seemed to know Shizuru much more than her brother.

"Does… Does Shizuru visit this woman often?" She couldn't quite believe how uncharacteristically inquisitive she had become. She never wanted to know or care about other people's love life before. What they did was none of her concern, but Shizuru's reaction towards the singer was something else.

"Quite. Usually during daytime though. They have been friends for years. They always—" Aoi replied, but was interrupted by the heavy set of shadow by the shoji door to Keiko's room.

Natsuki turned to see the large shadow. A male with his black hat was standing along the corridor.

"May I come in, Keiko…?" the man asked.

Keiko looked up from the koto, but kept her gaze on the thin wall instead of the door as if she had expected the guest at this time of night. "Yes, you may, my Lord."

The door slid open and revealed a tall man with a deep set of dark eyes. With his height and wide shoulders, he was considered a good-looking man in his late forties. His dark brown hair matched his light, freckled skin like a nobleman in his shining armor. His dark eyes twinkled even in the dim light. He entered the room and came to sit on the other side of the screen, his gaze fixing upon the singer. Natsuki could tell by his leisured manners that he was a frequent visitor.

The man held his folded fan to his lips. "I know that you have many… _friends_, but I do not like to have to wait for you in the back of the house. For a man of my status, I could be laughed at if found out. Who is your special visitor, whom has always rendered my confidence so low?"

Keiko turned to give him a small, earnest smile. "The love of my life, perhaps."

The man sat still, his clenched fists lowering onto his lap.

Keiko tilted her head to the side, her innocent smile turning into a sensual one, and it amazingly caused him to look away. "I do not love, my Lord, you know that."

"You have me," he whispered. His gaze now graced upon her, and it was as intense as fire.

"This is a sweet time. A beautiful time. But you will forget me once I grow old."

It took him a moment before he responded. "I do not want to imagine myself with anyone else but you. Mercy… Please, do not torture me."

Keiko let out a chuckle, and held the collars of her clothes closer. "I am forever your servant, but only the nights could keep us together."

"It will be difficult to convince you, but you have no idea what I would do for you." His words were clear, and his tone was calm. He showed neither hesitation nor remorse as if he couldn't help but pour out all of his emotions for her. Slowly, he walked up to the screen and lifted it, entering the other side of the room. He then took her arms and softly urged her down to the tatami floor.

"Uh—this—this is inappropriate. Now, we should go," Aoi hushed, lightly pulling Natsuki's arm.

"You weren't leaving when Keiko was stripped naked before?" Natsuki frowned.

"It—it is late."

"Right…"

Blushing, they cleared their throats, looking left and right in discomfort. They began to move along the bushes and sneaked their way out of the garden.

All the while, countless thoughts rushed through Natsuki's mind. Shizuru must have known of Keiko's usual visitors. If the girl had real feelings for the woman, Natsuki just couldn't imagine how Shizuru could act so nonchalantly towards Keiko's business. If it were her own case, she would have much trouble even to just look into the other person's eyes. As Natsuki learned to know more about the girl, Shizuru's ability to veil her emotions began to frustrate and scare her at the same time.

* * *

><p>At the rustling sound of clothes and footsteps, Shizuru opened her eyes to find Natsuki kneeling by her side. She frowned at first, her vision blurring from slumber. Blinking a few times, she focused on the face above her. Natsuki was watching her, eyes wide like a curious child. Natsuki had taken off her black hat and the loose tail of her raven hair was hung down around her slim shoulders. The soft smell of lavender then enveloped and clouded Shizuru's mind, almost succeeding in pulling her deep into a dreamy state.<p>

"Nat—Natsuki…, where have you been?" She groggily sat up. She had fallen asleep on Natsuki's bed, while waiting for the woman to turn up.

"I went out for a—a stroll. I… Somehow, I was carried away. It's a big city," Natsuki replied. Her tone was reserved, very unlike her usual self, but Shizuru wasn't in the state to question further.

"I am sorry. I—I will retire to my room now." Shizuru cleared her throat, unsure how Natsuki felt to see her using the woman's private space. Quickly, she got up to her feet, but swayed in her post. Her head was spinning like mad. Rubbing her temples, she inwardly cursed the state she was in. Perhaps, she hadn't had much rest the past weeks.

Without a word, Natsuki instantaneously grabbed her arms and brought her back down to the futon. "Silly. You could sleep here. It's your house after all."

After a fruitless resistance, Shizuru eventually lied down again, and her eyelids fluttered closed. As the lavender smell still lingered at the tips of her fingers, she reminded herself that she was not in the writer's abandoned cabin in Fuuka. But it was so hard to believe otherwise as she was in these arms.

"I thought… that you had gone back to your world, wherever it is." Shizuru muttered, trying to keep her mind off Fuuka—the falling leafs and the thick woods—the soil her feet had touched.

"I wish." Natsuki chuckled, and Shizuru blushed at the touch of the woman's warm breath upon her forehead.

"If you could go back, would you come back and pay me a visit?"

"If I could…?" Natsuki paused, deep in her thought.

After a long moment of silence, Shizuru shifted a little in discomfort. "You must have missed your loved ones so terribly."

"My father. I worry how he's doing now. My mother died long time ago, and there were just the two of us. I really miss him."

Shizuru's shoulders relaxed a little. She wasn't quite sure why she felt a pang of relief that Natsuki mentioned no one else but her father. "I hope that he is all right, and that one day you could go back to him."

"If I could go back, I'll bring him here with me next time. He'll love it here." Natsuki chortled to herself.

Smiling, Shizuru's eyes fluttered closed. "Kyoto is beautiful, is it not?"

Natsuki's reply came in the dark. "Yes, it is."

"It…" Shizuru yawned. She turned a little, her heavy head resting comfortably on Natsuki's chest. She could barely process her thoughts now. Everything became a blur to her. "It is just a dream…" she murmured.

The sound of Natsuki's breathing briefly stopped, and then resumed. "What is?"

Eyes closed, Shizuru clung closer to Natsuki's collars, and let herself falling back into slumber. "You…"

The warmth from Natsuki's body only quickened her speedy path to her dreamy state. For a moment, she felt the safest place in the world was in this room, right in the warm embrace.

* * *

><p>The birds began to chirp, stirring Shizuru out of her deep sleep. She opened her eyes and found herself next to Natsuki. The woman's arms were wrapped around her shoulder. Shizuru quickly sat up, and Natsuki wakened up at her fast commotion, groaning a bit.<p>

"Oiiii…" Natsuki then stretched her arms, making a face. Her arms must be numbed from holding Shizuru all night.

"I—I did not mean to wake you," Shizuru said, frowning in disapproval at her own blunder for lying on top of Natsuki's arm.

Smiling, Natsuki stretched some more like a lazy cat. "Heh, I used you as a pillow, so we're even."

Shizuru looked away. "Yes, we are," she said, but she wasn't convinced herself. The longer Natsuki walked into her life, the more her secret world was susceptible. Natsuki had easily slipped into her guarded space. It was threatened by strange coincidences and Natsuki's unexpected earnestness. Before her thoughts could drift away any further, she pulled her loosened collars closer and stood up, heading towards the door.

"Last night…" Natsuki started, but abruptly stopped. "Last night, I saw you."

Shizuru stopped by the door and turned to her. When Natsuki failed to continue, she asked, "What it?"

"I saw you with the singer…" Natsuki then sighed. "I followed you to Kanzaki mansion and ended up at the singer's house. I was just curious what you were doing in the city."

Shizuru held her breath. Indeed, there was no secret in the world. However, something else had suddenly become more important to her than her secrets. Sooner or later, the truth would find its way into the open. This very fact had scared her for years, but she had learned to live with it. In fact, she was counting the day it all would reveal and set her free.

"I supposed that you could not go about Kyoto by yourself. I am glad that Aoi had accompanied you. It is easy to get lost in the city."

Natsuki's head shot up, and their gazes locked for a long moment.

"Are you in love with her?" Natsuki's question came so simply that it almost slipped Shizuru's ears, but it took her by surprise.

Shizuru wouldn't know why Natsuki would care to know about her relationship with Keiko. It was a complicated state, which Shizuru herself had no certain answer. Keiko was one of the reasons her brother avoided her ever since; Eiji must have blamed all on her taking his place in Kyoto. Shizuru understood him, thus gave him no excuse to lessen his animosity towards her. She disagreed with her father's method, but she was in no position to refuse it. The best she could do was to elude getting too intimate with Keiko, which would only complicate the matter even more.

"I cannot fall in love until I could be 'Fujino Shizuru' again."

"_Cannot fall in love_," Natsuki echoed. "You said the same thing as Keiko did."

Shizuru stopped. Those words suddenly sounded so foreign to her, and she didn't want to know whom Keiko said it to. She just couldn't stop the distant ache growing in her heart. As much as she wanted to console Keiko with the truth, she could only watch the woman succumb into heartbreak.

"The sun does not shine brightly every day. It usually does not," she whispered. There was nothing she could do to change anything between them.

Natsuki lowered her gaze to the floor. "Aren't you mad that I spied on you…? I didn't mean to, but… but I was worried that you might get into trouble again, so I followed you."

Shizuru let out a sigh and shook her head. "I am getting used to it."

"I know too much. Aren't you tempted to kill me?" Natsuki raised one brow, and Shizuru somehow found it amusingly adorable.

Chortling, Shizuru wondered how easily Natsuki could bring a smile to her face without trying. Holding a fist to her lips, it took her a moment to compose herself. "I should take a bath now, and you, too." She looked down a bit before she continued, "It should be a sunny day. I could take you to the river. It is very beautiful there."

Natsuki's eyes widened in absolute surprise. "We're not going on a date, are we?"

"A date?"

"Never mind." Natsuki rolled her eyes.

A smile then graced Shizuru's lips. "In fact, I think I should take you to places with me from now on. You could be my personal guard. You would fit the job of scaring people away."

Natsuki laughed. "Personal guard? What about your boyfriend, Kiyoshi? He'd kill to get the job."

"I never understood what you meant by 'boyfriend'." Shizuru chuckled, leaning against the door. The woman just amused her endlessly.

Natsuki shrugged. "Never mind, for now. I'll teach you a few things later. Now, go take a bath."

"Ara, so you accept the task?" Shizuru crossed her arms across her chest.

"You bet," Natsuki said, perking her chin up.

* * *

><p>After a quick bath, Natsuki dressed up in a jaded kariginu, readied with her black hat. She wanted to wait for Shizuru, not wanting to risk if the girl would leave without her again. She sat on her heels in front of the girl's room, glancing sideway when Aoi approached her and sat down next to her.<p>

"Well, uh… I would appreciate it if you keep what you saw last night to yourself."

"What…? Oh, of course, I wouldn't want Shizuru to decapitate me just now," Natsuki said, sighing.

Her shoulders relaxed at Natsuki's reassurance. Aoi smiled and said, "I can tell that you will like Kyoto a lot. You will like being around Shizuru-sama. She is very kind."

Natsuki mockingly nodded. "I can tell as she hasn't already ordered me dead."

There was a long moment before Aoi nodded in response. "I am glad that Shizuru-sama has let you in. Please, look after her while I am not there."

Aoi's worried tone echoed Natsuki's own sentiment. Gulping, she fixed her gaze upon the wooden floor. "So many secrets, huh? I alone cannot help her. You have to tell me more."

"Do you not have secrets, Natsuki-san? As Shizuru-sama always said, 'life is as it is'. There is the past and future, but you cannot change any of it." Aoi stood up and then bowed.

Natsuki remained silent as Aoi left the corridor. She always thought of her life as simple and straight-forward, but she couldn't tell what was the past or future anymore as she sat here in this simple, wooden corridor. She felt the time had stilled, while the world had turned beyond her knowledge. She always said what she meant, and she was never good at hiding. However, there were times when she couldn't help but shy away from revealing how she truly felt, how lonely she had felt all her life, waiting for the one thing—someone to fill up the empty space in her life.

She had hidden the turmoil so deeply in her heart that sometimes she had forgotten it altogether. Her life had carried on as ordinarily as she wished, but it was turned upside down when she woke up to find herself in another equally complicated world. Shizuru's secrets had mirrored her own, and slowly it weakened her defense like nothing had ever succeeded. She couldn't deny that she wanted to be there, guarding the secret world Shizuru was desperate to keep, wishing someone would do the same for her. There were just so many things one could not show, but very few would understand why.

The door in front of her slid open, and revealed Shizuru in a deep red kariginu. The girl looked refreshed and regal in her new clothes, a black hat on her head. Her face brightened by the long, hot bath.

"Ara, you are fast… Shall we go?" Shizuru chortled at the sight of sitting, obedient Natsuki. The girl even scratched her head a bit at the surprise. Her smile told a million things and nothing at the same time. The first impression Natsuki had was the ingénue smile, a rare moment Shizuru hid nothing from others.

Natsuki straightened up, and a small smile graced her lips. It was though she had waited for the smile to come for a long time, only that she couldn't tell for how long.

A smile on her face, both hands were on her laps. "Let's," Natsuki responded. She wouldn't look away. She wouldn't turn away now. She stood up and extended her hand to Shizuru. She was willing for Shizuru to lead the way, while not knowing where they'd go. She was sure to be there to defend all wrongs, even if she knew no one could change the past… or the future.

"Look, who has a new friend. I see that your sociable self is back."

Shizuru looked past Natsuki's shoulder and smiled. "Good morning, father." She bowed.

Natsuki turned to the man behind her, but she stopped in her tracks. Her breath was caught in her throat. She blinked a few times to make certain that it was the man she saw with Keiko last night.

Fujino Masaru turned to stare at Natsuki, his gaze scrutinizing her. Clearly, he disapproved to see a stranger in a Fujino mansion, sharing the same sentiment Midori and Kiyoshi did.

Shizuru gradually stepped in front of Natsuki. "This is rather abrupt, but there is something I need to inform you… This is Kuga Natsuki. She goes by 'Kuga Nobuyuki' here in Kyoto. She is a friend of mine and Eiji as well. I promise that she will behave, and… our secret is safe."

Masaru took his gaze away from Natsuki and turned to his daughter, his expression grim. "When were you planning to inform me, if I had not run into you this morning? How did this girl know both you and Eiji?"

Natsuki noted how the maids, who were sitting along the corridor earlier, promptly took their leave as the conversation grew overwrought.

"She was lost in the woods, and we took her in. She is harmless, father."

Masaru stared at his daughter hard, lowering his voice. "And you just had to bring her here. You keep making it harder for us. Do you know what will happen to our family, if your cover is blown?"

"It will not happen, father. But even if the worst should happen, we could always bring Eiji back for real—"

"That is out of the question."

"Why?" Shizuru looked up, frowning. Even though her façade still appeared calm, Natsuki could hear the turmoil hidden deep in her voice.

Masaru looked away for a moment and waved his hand a little. "We will have a long talk later as I am to head out to the Fujiwara mansion. Whatever you do, Shizuru, keep out of troubles. Our family's name is in your hand. Do not let me down." He then held his folded fan to his lips and cleared his throat. He glanced at Natsuki once more and turned away. "I have never met a Kuga. She should be staying in the South wing with the servants. Do not let me see her around here again."

When he strutted to the other end of the hallway, Shizuru turned to Natsuki. The girl looked pale and anxious as she tried to keep her voice even. "Shall we go?"

Natsuki promptly nodded, and the two made their way along the corridor. She couldn't help but feel the weight of immense worry creeping in her heart. The encounter with Shizuru's father was inevitable, but she had expected less hassle than this. Masaru's distrust towards her was understandable. However, what caught Natsuki deeper was that both Shizuru and her father didn't know about Keiko's relationship with the other, while it was likely that they knew about Eiji's affair with the singer five years ago.

_So he is after the same woman his son did…_

Natsuki glanced back at the man at the far corridor. As if on cue, he had looked over his shoulder and watched her. His steady gaze was serious and contemplative. Quickly, she turned around and followed Shizuru out, chill running down her spine. It was safe to assume that Eiji was locked up in Fuuka mansion for more reasons than just to keep him safe from dangers in Kyoto. Someone didn't want him out more than keeping him in.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** I got a new fanart. Check out my profile page for link to Shizuru 3D work. Gotta admit that it was an attempt to revive my 3D Natsuki. Still got a lot to work on. I don't have much time these days. Haven't reread all of Legend of the Vampire, but I'm slowly getting there…


	16. C16: A Promise Made

**A/N: **Sorry for the long wait, if anyone is still following this story. Thank you for the historical bits of info! I will watch out for it next time. I have stated earlier in my author note that I don't have enough knowledge of Japanese history to make this story historically accurate. I'm sorry about that. (No beta).

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><p><strong>Chapter 16: A Promise Made<strong>

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><p>Walking through the woods, Natsuki strolled behind Shizuru. Surfing through the cloud of dry leaves, the shuffling sound of their feet was the only sound accompanying them. Shizuru had claimed to need some fresh air, and had told her carriage to meet up at the market. Natsuki only followed the girl for a quiet walk.<p>

The encounter with Fujino Masaru still lingered in Natsuki's mind. She couldn't seem to shake it off. There were things about him that seemed odd to her, but she didn't know if Shizuru had felt it, too. The girl had been silent since they left the mansion, and Natsuki just couldn't tell what was going through her mind.

Shizuru's glide was as graceful and quiet as a ghost's would be. The girl reached out her right hand, briefly touching the falling leaves with the back of her hand. Natsuki's heart skipped a beat at the sight. She had walked the slow, dreamlike walk amidst the falling leaves before. There were the crimson kariginu, the black hat, and the pale skin. The soft wind whirled around her, and she swore that she had seen this particular flash of event before.

"Natsuki… Why are you stopping?"

"Uh… Oh, I—I was just…" Natsuki looked down at her feet, contemplating whether she should continue. "Where's the river you talked about?"

Holding the folded fan to her lips, Shizuru let out a small chuckle. "I cannot believe that I am the one having to reassure you of your safety. Trust me. I am not luring you into a deep, dark forest to leave you to rot there. We have to walk through the woods a little further to pass the market before we could get to the river."

Natsuki couldn't help but smirk. "Well, after all the women I have seen around you, I would need some reassurance."

Shizuru's smile faded, causing Natsuki to stop. Maybe she had gone a little too far; both Lady Kitahara and Keiko must have meant something to Shizuru. Natsuki then tried to remind herself of her original goal: finding the ruby bracelet in hope to return to her world. Nothing else should matter. However, Shizuru's love life had become a great distraction to her.

Shizuru looked at her companion quizzically. "There is nothing between Keiko and me. She still believes that I am Eiji. What you saw has misled you."

Natsuki mentally twitched. "So you don't feel anything for her?"

Shizuru raised one brow. "Natsuki is being nosy again. You just can't help it, can you?"

Natsuki perked her chin up and walked up ahead. "I just need all the information to fend off some unwanted persons, that's all. _Your_ unwanted persons, I mean."

Shizuru chortled. "The market is the other way."

Blushing, Natsuki spun on her heels and marched towards where the girl was gesturing at. "I know."

* * *

><p>Shizuru led Natsuki along the narrow road through the market. The villagers occasionally bowed as Shizuru passed. Several groups of girls held their fans up, their eyes smiling. Under the calm mask, Shizuru watched them back. It couldn't be denied that she liked the attention. Seeing it, it didn't surprise Natsuki that the girl seemed to have a rather messy love life, a sharp contrast to her own dull one.<p>

Soon, they made a quick stop by a two-story, medicine store. Shou, the seventy-year-old owner, greeted Shizuru with a deep bow and a bright smile.

"How is your mother?" he asked.

"She's been feeling better. Thanks to your help, Shou-san."

Shou was a balding man with jubilant smile. He was a foot shorter than Shizuru and of a thick build. In his navy kimono, he appeared energetic and robust. He went about the long, wooden counter and fished out five packs of herbal medicine from the cabinet below.

"This week's medicine. It should give her more strength to get out of bed. It is good for blood circulation and digestion. Try to get her to walk around more. It is good to get a little of exercise."

"Thank—" Shizuru reached over the counter, but accidentally knocked the ceramic pot off with her elbow.

Quickly, Shou grabbed the pot before it hit the floor. "Oh!" he exclaimed, holding up the pot with both hands.

Shizuru looked bewildered as she leaned over the counter. "I am sorry, Shou-san! How clumsy of me!"

"Do not worry. It's nothing. I've got hundreds of them to spare!"

Natsuki chuckled at Shou's wide grin. The man seemed to be agile for someone his age, but it was probably what the herbs did to one's body. His skin though a little oily flushed with healthy red.

"Thank you." Shizuru handed him a few gold coins over the counter.

Eyes widened, Shou shook his head vehemently. "This is too much, Eiji-san! This is too much."

"I do not want to rely much on prayers. They never did us any good," Shizuru said, winking.

Natsuki raised her brows. Shizuru seemed much more modern than the people of her time. When one fell ill, they'd go to the monks. However, Shizuru trusted more of some local, herbal medicines for her mother instead.

"Ah, I will fetch some Chinese tea your mother likes. It is very difficult to find in the market here."

"How thoughtful of you." Shizuru leaned against the counter, holding the packages in her hands.

Beaming, he disappeared behind the brown curtains into the private section of his store.

Natsuki moved closer to the girl. "What's wrong with your mother?"

"It's the usual. She always feels fainted. She cannot stay out in the sun for too long. Her condition has worsened in the past years, but only with Shou-san's medicine, she would seem healthier."

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that." Natsuki slightly nodded. Some simple illnesses could cost lives in the old time. Now, she just felt bad that she didn't know how to help.

_Gosh, it's not like I'd become a doctor, if I knew I'd be transported a thousand years back in time. _

"How long has she been on his med? Has her condition improved?" Natsuki scratched her head.

"Almost a year now. Well, she's been ill for several years, so we are doing what we could. Shou-san is quite famous in Kyoto, but father only approved to seek his help last year. He's originally from mainland China, but he's settled here for more than 35 years—"

"Ah, there you are, Eiji!"

Both Natsuki and Shizuru turned to the source of interruption.

A small smile then appeared on Shizuru's face. "Good morning, Reito. What are you doing here?"

The young man took a moment to study Natsuki from head to toe, his gaze filled with admiration. "I saw your carriage outside, so I assumed that you might be here. And I was right. Is this handsome, young man what you are trying to hide from me?"

Chortling, Shizuru turned to Natsuki, while gesturing at Reito. "This is Kanzaki Reito. He is the first son of General Kanzaki Hayato."

Reito swung his arm around Shizuru's shoulder, his gaze never leaving Natsuki. "I presume that he is why you have not come see me as often as you used to. I must admit that I am quite jealous."

Shizuru just chortled to his remark and winked back at Natsuki. "Kuga Nobuyuki from Dewa. He's my new confidant here… Or more like a guard, I'd say."

Reito moved beside Natsuki, leaning in so close, causing her to take a step away. "I do not remember last time you visited Dewa. That place is desolated. A bore."

"It… it was a short visit last summer with Midori." Shizuru glanced at Natsuki.

Reito's gaze flickered between the two, and laughed. "I see now why you have not bothered to visit me lately. Your new friend is very fine, indeed."

Natsuki inwardly grumbled. Reito's remark had made Fujino Eiji's relationship with other males seemed so ordinary. She was just wondering how many girlfriends Shizuru had, but now she might have to ponder how many boyfriends Shizuru had as well. Lady Kitahara and Kiyoshi were probably only a few to the list. The ever calm smile on Shizuru's face appeared more ingenuous than it truly was.

* * *

><p>After Shizuru got the tea, the three of them headed out to the carriages. They planned to have an early lunch at Kanzaki mansion. While Reito had successfully kept Shizuru to himself, Natsuki followed the duo, trying her best to pay attention elsewhere. She didn't like the way he was staring at her, and it was good that he was busied with Shizuru instead.<p>

Holding both the herbs and tea packets for Shizuru, Natsuki strolled through the crowd. She listened to the laughs and chatters. She noted the patterned, colorful clothes of the passersby. The smell of food hit her nose as she passed the food stalls along the busy road. Life exuded all over the place, and she felt small, swallowed in it. She'd feel as though she was a part of it, if she weren't careful.

Just before they reached their carriages, a sudden shout erupted. "That girl…! Stop… her! She's stolen… my goods!"

Natsuki heard the male voice shouting from ahead, but many heads and shoulders blocked her view of what was going on.

"Stop her, please!"

_Who—_

Natsuki tiptoed, but before she could see clearly, she felt a hard push knocking her off her feet. She rolled onto the ground, her hat flying off into the distance. "Ouch…" Groaning, she opened her eyes again to see herself lying flat on her stomach, her clothes covered in dust, and both her palms were bleeding from the fall.

"Kuga!" Shizuru rushed to kneel next to Natsuki. Her men had discarded the carriage and hurried to their master. Shizuru gestured for them to pick up the fallen packets. She turned to Natsuki again and gently pulled her up. "Are you all right?"

Shards of glasses were scattered on the ground around her. Her brows knitted, Natsuki looked at several, violet-tinted, palm-size, broken bottles lying nearby. The smell of the liquid inside had fumed up and suffocated her with the scent of lavender. It felt more real than it had ever been. It felt as if she could catch it in her palm.

Reito grabbed the thief in question by the collar and pulled her up to her feet. She was approximately of Natsuki's height, but much more robust. Her reddish, short hair hung down a little just below her ears.

"A thief, are you?" Reito questioned, his tone rough.

The girl bowed her head down as to avoid his stare.

"Oh, thank you for catching her! She stole my imported goods!" Panting, a man finally caught up with the thief. His short hair sported a tint of golden brown in the sun, suggesting his mixed heritage. He moved closer to the thief and scolded in her face. "Do you know how hard it was for me to get them from the mainland!? I took pity on you. I fed you on the ship for weeks! How dare you!?" The red-faced man arched his arm, but halted when he felt a grip at his wrist.

Shizuru had pulled him back. When she saw that he wasn't attempting to break from her grasp, she eventually let go off him. "There are still unbroken bottles, but I will pay for all of them."

The man hesitated, but his eyes then widened at the gold coins Shizuru fish out of her purse. He promptly collected the coins into his dirty bag. "You are kind. God bless you." He then shot a glance at the thief before walking away, shaking his head in disappointment.

Natsuki gathered the unbroken bottles from the ground and held them in both hands. She raised one bottle and squinted up at the sun through the glass, watching the liquid swim in the container. She just couldn't believe that she had found the source of the scent, which had haunted her entire life, in a busy market street like this.

Hugging the bottles to her chest, Natsuki came to stand next to Shizuru. "Do you remember the scent—" she began, but was cut off when Shizuru bent down to retrieve the black hat from the ground. Shizuru brushed off the dust and carefully wore it on Natsuki's head again.

Natsuki blushed at her forgetfulness, but mostly at Shizuru's caring gesture. "T—thanks…"

"We can get your wounds cleaned up at his mansion."

"Yeah, that'll be nice," Natsuki said. She still felt the sharp stings on her palms.

The thief girl broke off Reito's hold and ran to kneel in front of Shizuru. "Thank you, Fujino-sama! You have just saved my life. You are as kind as they say. I am forever grateful to you."

Shizuru stopped in her tracks. People still gathered around, smiling and watchful eyes were upon her. "You won't be spared every time." She and Reito then began to walk away.

As Natsuki followed the pair ahead, she took one look at the kneeling figure. The thief started to brush the dust off her face; she looked up and their gazes locked. Natsuki's jaw dropped, and her body froze at the sight.

"M—Mai?"

The thief frowned. "Yes. How did you know my name?"

_This… is impossible… _

The smell of lavender intensified and swirled all around Natsuki, so much so that her head started to feel dizzy. Her knees weakened, and her body swayed. If not for the hands gripping her arms in time, she would have fallen to her knees. She slightly looked over her shoulder and saw Shizuru behind her, her back resting against the taller girl's chest.

Worry resided in the crimson eyes. "What's wrong?"

Natsuki didn't quite have the answer herself as everything in this world was so wrong. She turned her attention to Mai, studying the girl, while her heart screamed for any sign from her friend. However, Mai just stood up, brushing the dust off her clothes and looked up at her with a confused look in her eyes.

_She doesn't remember me… No, of course not._

"Kuga?" Shizuru called out for her again.

"I—I'm all right. Let's go." Natsuki glanced at Mai for the last time before turning away.

Keeping her gaze on the ground, she let out a long sigh. First, it was Midori. Then the silver-haired, old lady appeared in the woods. The notebook, the pair of bracelets and Fujino Eiji became as real as they would get. Now Mai showed up as though it was all an alternate universe Natsuki had been thrown in. The pieces of the puzzle began to emerge one by one, but her mind was still reeling where it all would lead her. Everything happened for a reason, didn't it?

"It smells familiar, does it not?"

At the statement, Natsuki looked up at Shizuru. The girl was looking ahead, but Natsuki could see the gaze clouded with many thoughts. "You bought all of it because it reminds you of the scent," she stated.

"It is as foreign as you are," Shizuru mumbled.

After a moment, Natsuki grinned. "Then you should wear it every day from now on, so you'll get used to it."

Shizuru turned to smile at the smaller woman. "As I would get used to having you around? I'm glad that you intend to be a part of my life instead of leaving."

Natsuki felt the sudden rush of blood to her cheeks. "It isn't like I knew where else to go."

Immediately, Shizuru looked away. "I will help you find your way home. I promise that I won't hold you back." She then stalked towards the carriage without another word.

Natsuki mentally smacked herself at her slip. It wasn't the first time she had made it clear that she only stayed with Shizuru because she had no one else, only she had never thought that the sentiment would bother the girl.

* * *

><p>After having early lunch at Kanzaki mansion, Shizuru and Natsuki headed out again. Riding on their carriage, Natsuki felt thankful to have left Reito's presence. While the man was full of wits and dashing smiles, his stares were getting on her nerves. The people of their class seemed to know no boundary of their sexual conquest. While under a male guise, Reito continued to sprout his advances at her. She didn't want to think what more he would do if he knew that she was, in fact, a woman.<p>

Sighing, Natsuki couldn't help but feel relieve that Shizuru wasn't like that. At least, the girl hadn't made any advances so far. Then her brows raised; she looked up at the girl sitting opposite to her. Shizuru seemed to have had several male and female _friends_, but how many really knew her like Lady Kitahara, seeing how Shizuru needed to keep her masquerade intact. At least, the beautiful Keiko still hadn't learned the truth. For some reason, Natsuki felt privileged to be one of a few to hold that secret.

"Why are you smiling?" Shizuru suddenly asked.

Natsuki touched her cheeks, startled if she was really smiling. She was sure that Shizuru wasn't even looking at her. Actually, the girl hadn't spared her a glance after they left Kanzaki mansion.

"You seem to be taken with him," Shizuru eventually remarked.

"Huh? You mean Kanzaki?"

Shizuru shifted in her sitting position, keeping her gaze elsewhere. "He is taken with you, I can tell. Do you like him?"

_Oh… _Natsuki blinked a few times. For all the subtlety these people tried to display, they weren't really _subtle_ after all. At least, Keiko wasn't very modest in showing how she wanted Shizuru last night.

"I like him a lot less than you like that singer." Natsuki lightly shrugged.

Shizuru lightly blushed. "What are you talking about?"

Natsuki should have been giggling to see Shizuru's rare blush, but her body felt cold at the sight. "Why don't you just tell her the truth? She might surprise you even," she said, annoyance quickly rising within her.

Shizuru leaned back against the thin wall. Her hands were clutching the bag containing the perfume bottles as though they held such importance to her. "I see no reason to. Fujino Eiji will never marry a singer."

"Eiji might not be able to marry her, but what about you? Will you just disregard your feelings for her?"

A forced laugh escaped Shizuru's throat. "I don't have feelings for her. And my father already has a long list of rich and powerful men waiting to marry me."

Natsuki rolled her eyes. "So you just can't wait for Eiji to get married, so you could have your own wedding."

"It should be the most exciting thing in my entire life."

"Your aunt would be very disappointed to see you like this."

Shizuru dryly chuckled. "She'll understand. She always understands me."

Natsuki took in a deep breath, staring out the screened window on her side of the carriage. Seeing how Keiko and Shizuru interacted with each other last night, it must have confused and torn Keiko so badly. For some reason, she really felt bad for the singer. Everyone deserved a truth, didn't they? Anyone with so much heart and hurt should be granted with a truth.

Shizuru turned to look out the screened window on her side. "Ara, we're here. The Fujiwara's Autumn Mansion. My mother lives here. She'd love to see new faces. It brightens her dull days, she says."

"Didn't you promise to take me to the river?" Natsuki frowned. She had thought that Shizuru would visit her mother on her own. Having just met Masaru this morning, she didn't particularly fancy meeting another Fujino again so soon.

Shizuru jumped off the carriage. Smiling, she offered a hand up to Natsuki, who looked bewildered to know whom they were going to meet.

"Oooookay. Thanks for telling me _now_." Natsuki shakily took the girl's hand and climbed out.

* * *

><p>Shizuru and Natsuki were seated along the wide passageway. In front of them was the screen, which separated the room from the passageway. Behind them were a pond and a big garden. Sakura leaves had fallen, blanketed the ground in jaded pink.<p>

"It has been a while. I thought that you have forgotten me." The ragged voice came from the other side of the screen. The woman sounded younger than Natsuki had expected. Her tone was light, but harbored sadness. Perhaps, it was only because she was ill.

"Father had me busied with errands. I am sorry for not visiting you sooner. How are you feeling, mother? I have gotten the medicine from Shou-san like you have ordered," Shizuru said.

"Your father has too many strange ideas. He does not know that he will get you into trouble one day." The ailing woman stopped for a moment. "And who is that your new friend?"

Shizuru cleared her throat a little. "He… She is a friend from Fuuka Island. Her name is Kuga Natsuki, but she goes by 'Kuga Nobuyuki' here. She is my new guard in Midori's absence."

The woman sighed. "You are playing with fire, Shizuru. Is this another of your father's bizarre idea?"

"No, it is mine. She is trustworthy."

Natsuki had to smile at the statement. It somehow warmed her heart to hear such a thing from Shizuru.

"You are just like him. You are too much like him sometimes." The woman then sat up on her futon.

Natsuki could see shadows of several maids moving around the woman, offering a bowl of water. After rinsing her face, the woman lightly waved the maids away. Then she moved towards the screen and lifted it up. She took a few steps forwards, but stopped in her tracks as her focus had shifted her daughter and came to fix upon Natsuki.

Natsuki sat with wide eyes, unsure what had particularly caught the woman's attention. Fujino Yumi was in her mid-forties. Her skin was as white as the snow, not the illuminating kind, but the sickly kind. There were dark circles around her eyes, and her lips were dried and pale. She was excruciatingly thin, but Natsuki could still catch the jading beauty from her straight nose and perfectly sculpted face.

When Yumi swayed in her post, Shizuru instantly moved beside her, holding her arms with both hands.

"Chiyo! Chi—" Shizuru called out for the maid.

"I'm… all right…" Yumi breathed. She clutched her daughter's hand. Her dark gaze continued to scrutinize Natsuki.

Natsuki inwardly cringed. Knowing how superstitious these people could be, she just hoped that Yumi hadn't just decided that she was a jinx of some sort. Looking down, she tried to imagine that she was invisible. She just had to blame it on Shizuru for taking her here for apparently no good reason.

Slowly, Yumi moved to stand in front of Natsuki. "What did you say her name is?"

Shizuru eyed her mother with worry. "Kuga Nobu—"

"Her real name." Her mother's words came curt, almost impatient.

"Kuga Natsuki."

Yumi then sighed, tiredly shaking her head. "No. I have never heard of a Kuga." She turned away from Shizuru and walked back to the screen, burying her face in her palm. "Only… only Kruger," she muttered.

_What…!? _

Natsuki's head shot up, disbelief in her eyes. Not only that Shizuru had been the only one who was able to pronounce her last name right, someone else actually knew a Kruger in this world.

"Kruger?" Shizuru echoed.

Yumi briefly glanced back at Natsuki. "You do look very much like her, young woman."

Natsuki shot up to her feet and approached the woman. Her action seemed to alarm Shizuru, and only then she slowed down. "Who—who was it? Who went by the name 'Kruger'?"

_Could it be the writer? It must be!_

"How come I have never heard you mention it before?" Shizuru asked, a trace of discomfort gracing her angelic face.

"You were very young back then, Shizuru." Yumi then turned to stare at Natsuki. "I knew a certain Kruger, a foreigner. For years, she became my confidant. Her name was Saeko Kruger. I cannot remember her motherland though. It was a strange name."

_Sae… Saeko Kruger… Oh, my God, mom was here!_

"Is—is she still around? Where is she now? Please, tell me!" Natsuki asked, a strange kind of hope rising in her heart. At least, there was a lead. Perhaps, this was the reason for her to come back here.

Yumi looked away. Her body began to shiver, and Shizuru instantly moved to hold her arms. "There was a festival we were looking forward to partake in, but… but her carriage was attacked by a group of bandits. They showed no mercy and took everything they could, including her life… She passed away ten years ago."

Natsuki froze. It was as though life had been sucked out of her again. She wasn't sure why she was stunned by the news. It wasn't new to her, was it? But it felt as though her mother had died twice on her, and the pain just intensified. Tears shot to her eyes, and she looked away, quickly brushing the wetness off her face. Wasn't it supposed to be this way? It was destined to be. What was lost remained so forever.

"I… I would like to rest," Yumi said.

Shizuru helped her mother to lie down on the bed and pulled the blanket up to woman's chest. Chiyo, an old maid, entered the room through the backdoor, and brought a fresh towel for her master.

Shizuru softly put a hand over her mother's forehead. "No fever. I think that she is just tired. Please, take good care of her," she said.

Chiyo bowed. "Yes, Shizuru-sama."

Gathering all her strength, Natsuki took a step closer the screen and slipped in. Both Shizuru and Chiyo glanced at each other in uncertainty.

"Natsuki, could you wait outside?" Shizuru whispered, almost worried at her stance.

Yumi opened her eyes again to gaze up at the green pools. The woman neither welcomed nor chased Natsuki away. "You are not a ghost of my past, are you…? What is it, child? What is it that you want?"

"Did she… Did Saeko ever mention anything about a notebook? A diary?"

Shizuru paused at Natsuki's question, and then looked down at her mother.

There was a long moment of silence before the frail woman replied, "No. Not that I recall."

At the answer, Natsuki felt her heart sink to the bottomless pit of darkness. Coldly, she turned and slipped out of the room. Her heart heavy with what she had just heard—with everything that had happened today. Her feet numbed, but they kept trudging ahead. She didn't know where she was heading, but it appeared that she had walked so fast that Shizuru had to rush after her, slightly out of breath.

Guided out of stupor by the warm hands on hers, Natsuki stopped and found that they were standing by the pond. The cool wind could not pacify her feverish mind. Hot tears swam to her eyes again, forcing her to look away.

Shizuru took her in a tight embrace. "What's wrong, Natsuki? Tell me," she whispered.

Natsuki swallowed her tears. She felt herself trembling in the warm grip. "Saeko… Saeko Kruger is my mother."

Shizuru broke the embrace just slightly to study her. Extraordinarily, the crimson gaze was the only thing that seemed to understand her in this world. No one else would believe her. Nothing else made sense now. Biting her bottom lip, Natsuki stared back at the troubled gaze. Tears continued to pour down her cheeks, and she didn't know how to stop it.

"For a moment there, you know, I thought… I thought that I finally knew why I am here, that I was sent here for a reason, to find my mother again. She died ten years ago in my world, Shizuru. It's just like what your mother said, and it only told me one thing. I can't change it. I can't change a thing! For God's sake, why am I here then!?" Her lips trembled against her words, her despair against her wounded soul.

"If you must know, I ran into someone I knew today. That thief girl, I knew her. Yeah, she's—_was_ my best friend, but she can't remember me now. I… I even met Midori before I woke up in your Fuuka mansion, but nobody remembers me now. I feel… God, this is pointless. Why was I sent here, while everything was taken away from me? I can't do this anymore. I don't want to be _that_ writer. I just… I want to go home…"

Sinking to the grass, Natsuki sat with her face down, hugging her knees. Any optimistic hopes in her heart had vanished now. This world was as cruel as hers, if not even more. Then she felt strong arms envelope her, unexpectedly bringing a sense of security around her. She had felt it before, an ethereal sensation that sometimes came with the lavender scent. It used to soothe her to sleep whenever she was troubled. It became even clearer now that she could feel it firsthand.

"What was I like in your world?" Shizuru muttered.

At the uncertainty in the girl's voice, Natsuki slowly looked up at the crimson gaze, contemplating. "I… No, I haven't met you in my world. Strange, isn't it?"

Shizuru then tightened her arms around Natsuki, but her force felt even gentler to the raven-haired woman. "Strange, I wouldn't know. But… it is a pleasure to meet you, Natsuki."

Natsuki couldn't help it. A small chuckle escaped her lips at the girl's attempt to console her.

"There are things that we cannot explain, but we all know that we can't change the past… I wish that you would start anew, and I'd like to be there to greet you."

Safe in those arms, Natsuki gazed up at the face next to hers. With everything that had happened around her, she felt as though she was stuck in the past. With so much pain within her, she found it hard just to look for another bright, beautiful day. Her father could never make her forget. Her friends could never take away all the pain. Ironically, someone from the past had asked her to look to the future. Perhaps, it wasn't a calling, which brought her here. Perhaps, it was her unknowingly need to come back. What a strange occurrence, indeed. What had she desperately needed to come back for?

_The future?_

Natsuki reluctantly clutched Shizuru's hand on her arm. Her eyes fluttered close, her head leaning against the girl's shoulder.

'_I will cross the plane of time, every star to find you… Wait for me…'_

Then she faintly recalled a vow a long time ago—a promise to return. Was it the writer who made it? Was it Natsuki Kruger? Natsuki could only sigh in defeat. Only the future could tell.


	17. C17: Everyone Has a Secret

**A/N: **I'm caught up in some projects, and short-chapter is the order of the day. Thanks for dropping me words of encouragement! Feel free to spot out the mistakes you'll see below. I'm not sure of how hygienic Heian people were, but I think the characters at least need a bath. Now, on with the story :)

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><p><strong>Chapter 17: Everyone Has a Secret<strong>

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><p>The trip to the Kamo River never happened. After their talk by the pond, Shizuru brought Natsuki back to their in the eastern part of the city. Much to Natsuki's protest, the girl insisted that Natsuki needed some rest. Her crying must have stunned and worried the girl. To avoid upsetting her father, Shizuru had the maids prepare a room for Natsuki in the south wing, where the servant quarters were.<p>

Leaning back in the square, wooden tub, Natsuki was bathed in freshly heated water. She let out a long, contented sigh. It amazingly reenergized her after what she had gone through today. The tub was located in the yard next to her designated room, a small passageway between them. Surrounding the tub were the bamboo-made walls that gave her some privacy. She looked up at the starry sky, trying to cherish the warmth of the water before the chilly wind would take it all away too soon. The maids were kind enough to indulge her and heated up the water just for her.

Natsuki herself didn't particularly mind where her room would be as long as she had a roof over her head. However, the thought of the old, deserted cabin entered her mind. She unknowingly gripped both sides of the tub, her eyes staring ahead. Nowhere on earth could have made her feel as haunted as that place—this world or her own.

While it seemed that the past would remain unchanged, she wasn't sure how to interpret what she saw in the cabin. What was the spirit trying to tell her? Why did it show itself to only Shizuru and her? If she wasn't too far off on her guess, the spirit had something that connected Shizuru and her together. The only thing she could think of was the pair of bracelets. Wasn't the missing one what brought her from Germany and back to Fuuka in the first place? It was either she wanted to travel back a thousand years in time to find something, however odd that sounded, _or_ something was calling out for her.

_Maybe if I ask her nicely, she might let me see the bracelets._

"Damn it." Natsuki groaned, wiping her face with her hand. She just wouldn't know what she would do with the bracelets even if Shizuru would allow her a glimpse.

Out of the blue, she snapped at the set of shadow emerging on the other side of the shoji door of her room. She peeked through the tiny gaps between the bamboo poles.

"Fujino-sama wishes to see you." It was one of the maids.

Natsuki sat up, fear gripping her. "W—which one?"

"Umm… Shizuru-sama wishes to see you, Kuga-san."

Natsuki inwardly sighed that it wasn't Masaru. With all the theories floating in her head, she wouldn't know what to make of her face if she had to see him. She reached out of the tub and grabbed the white kosode pooled on the floor. "Right! One second!" Stepping out of the tub, she put on the robe, tying it with an obi. She blew out a few breaths at the cold wind and walked out of the bamboo partition.

The shoji door slid open, revealing Shizuru in a white robe, patterned with jaded-pink flowers. Her robe was tied with a narrow obi. A blue-colored piece of scarf wrapped around her shoulders, she stood by the doorway, staring down at Natsuki. Her chestnut tresses were swaying with the soft wind, exposing her pale skin and perfectly sculpted face. For a moment, the girl didn't utter a word, but Natsuki could feel the crimson gaze trail down the wet strands of her dark hair, which were sticking to her cheeks and hung down to her shoulders and chest.

Natsuki couldn't help but feel somewhat uncomfortable under the stare. She looked down, blushing a little. "I thought that you went to sleep. You need something?"

Shizuru shifted her weight between her feet. "Aoi told me that you needed a bath at this time of night. I was worried that you might catch a cold."

Natsuki looked up. "Well, I might as well get the most out of it before winter hits us. It's a very beautiful night out here. You should try it sometimes."

"I could have a bath in my own room."

Natsuki edged towards the raised passageway. Shizuru promptly extended a hand down, and she reluctantly took it. Her heart beat a little faster at the touch, but she tried to brush the sensation aside. Perhaps, it was just a lonely time. Perhaps, she had just never taken the time to register any contact with other human being. She let Shizuru pull her up and came to stand next to the girl, all the while looking elsewhere.

"How'd they bring you warm water into your room?" Natsuki faked a frown, gesturing back to the bathtub.

"A few buckets work fine," Shizuru said.

Natsuki turned to the girl. "You make those old women to fill in the tub for you?"

"What's wrong with that? They filled yours."

"Yeah, but they didn't have to carry the heavy buckets around."

"I am their master. Anything I want, I got it." Lightly smiling, Shizuru leaned back against the door, arms across her chest.

Natsuki rolled her eyes. She could probably understand where Shizuru came from, but she continued to refuse it. For some reason, she needed to render the persistent gaze into something else, something a little less harmless. She shook her head, gesturing towards the yard. "But the stars! It's what makes it special because it's so beautiful out there. Why cramp everything up in your room?"

A curious smile imprinted on Shizuru's face. "So it is not about heavy buckets after all. I am curious now as to what the stars could tell you. Do they speak to you?"

Natsuki grinned. "Well, sort of. In my world, they are so far, far away and far apart from one another. But however small or gigantic they are, they're only a part of the universe. They're each unique. They speak of freedom, Shizuru. It's in your heart to pursue it or not."

Her face neutral, Shizuru pushed herself off the door and moved towards Natsuki. "I like your interpretation."

At their proximity, Natsuki's breath caught in her throat. They stood so close to each other that it left very little room between them. Natsuki found it harder and harder each second past to just stay on her feet. Shizuru had leaned in closer, and Natsuki's heart beating fast against her chest.

"What… are you… doing?" Natsuki's lips barely moved as she willed herself from shivering. But her whispered words succeeded in stopping Shizuru.

Shizuru paused for a moment before stepping back, thoughts swimming in those suddenly clouded gaze. She then took off her scarf and handed it to Natsuki. "In my absence, I thought that I'd lend you this tonight."

Natsuki instantly frowned, her hand shooting to clutch the scarf. "Where are you going?"

"Return to my room, of course."

"Eh?"

"Or would Natsuki prefer me to spend a night with her like last night?"

Natsuki blushed. "No, that's not what I meant."

Shizuru smiled knowingly. "Then I should retire to bed now. Father will not be amused if he sees me in a servant's room." She then moved towards the other side of the room, the set of doors that would lead her to the main passageway of the south wing.

Natsuki quickly followed, wrapping the scarf over her shoulders. "You shouldn't have to worry what he likes or doesn't like."

Stopping by the doors, Shizuru turned to face Natsuki. "Well, it's important that I carry through for now, so that I can find the 'freedom' you mentioned. Tomorrow I will be rather busy with an appointment father has made for me. Will you please be a dear and stay out of trouble? If you would like to go sightseeing, please take Aoi with you."

Natsuki grabbed Shizuru's arm before the girl could leave. "What appointment?"

Shizuru stopped a little, gazing down Natsuki's hand on her. The calm, but contemplative look did cause Natsuki to retract her hand. "It's just another formal meeting with the girl of his dream."

"Ah… The girl of his dream…" Natsuki echoed, but then inwardly scoffed at the thought of Keiko. The case was really crawling on her, seeing how suspiciously Eiji and Yumi had fallen ill for years. Masaru might be the only one who could explain why. Possibly, Shou might know something but was afraid to tell others, since the Fujino family was too powerful and threatening for a commoner like him.

Shizuru mildly sighed. "Father wishes that Eiji could marry her, albeit it isn't going to be easy. I have known her for years, but she's a wild one. Also she has many marriage proposals, which I must compete with to gain her affection. Even the Crown Prince, her half-brother, could not make her marry."

Natsuki raised her brows in mockery. "It sounds like you're going to have a field day tomorrow. Have fun."

Shizuru chuckled. "I just wish that, even if she accepts my proposal, she wouldn't try to kill me on our wedding night."

Natsuki narrowed her eyes. "She sounds feisty. Why doesn't she want to marry anyone?"

"With all the talks about freedom and such, perhaps, she's as strange as Natsuki." Shizuru winked.

"H—hey—" Natsuki was going to scold in protest, but stopped at the tender finger pressing upon her lips.

"Shush. You're going to wake the whole wing up." Shizuru's finger lingered on the trembling lips a little longer than it should. Only when Natsuki stiffened, she pulled her hand back.

"You're exaggerating it. I—I am not that loud." Natsuki suddenly found herself whispering.

Shaking her head in amusement, Shizuru turned to the shoji doors once more. The maids waiting outside slid the doors open, and she stepped out. "Good night, Natsuki, and try not to dream about me."

Heat shot up to her face, Natsuki debated whether to shout after the girl, but decided not to with all the glances from the giggly maids sitting by the doorway. She could only watch until the girl disappeared into the dim corridor.

_Sleep well, Shizuru…_

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><p>Natsuki tossed and turned on the futon. Staring up at the ceiling, she rested the back of her right hand over her forehead. It had been almost two hours since Shizuru's visit to her room, but her mind was still restless. Every time she closed her eyes to try to fall asleep, she would be pulled back into vigilance by series of shouts in her ears, the faces of the passersby she saw earlier today, the conniving look on Masaru's face, the emptiness in Mai's eyes, and Yumi's forlorn gaze. They kept flashing through her drained mind, insistently stirring uneasiness within her. It had been a long day for her, and the mention of her mother from some complete stranger only made it worse.<p>

_Oiiiiiiii! _Troubled, Natsuki sat up, clutching the hem of her blanket.

Last but not least, what had also kept her wide-awake was Shizuru's smile. The notion was somewhat difficult for her to admit. She wouldn't know what had caused the strange feeling inside of her every time the girl was near. She had never felt such unease around anyone before, and it only confused her to feel this way towards another girl. Indisputably, Shizuru was gorgeous, not to mention that she also appeared handsome as 'Eiji'.

_Okaaaay. What am I thinking? _Natsuki blushed at her own thoughts.

At times, Shizuru was just being kind and friendly, but there were a few moments when the girl's stare lingered on her for a tad too long. With Shizuru, the gestures were very subtle, and nothing was ever distinct, or so Natsuki felt that way. She found it hard to believe that Shizuru might actually harbor feelings for her. After all, it was undeniable that Shizuru liked Keiko.

At the thought of the singer, Natsuki sighed at all the things evolving around the Fujino family. She didn't really want Shizuru to fall through with the plan, entrapping herself in her father's schemes. Masaru had ignored his ill wife and son, leaving them to their own fate, and tried to further the family's importance in the court at the expense of his daughter. By his affair with Keiko, he had done his family harm for far too much already. Now it was only Shizuru who still stood, and Natsuki felt the need to protect the girl as best she could.

She bit her bottom lip and got up to her feet. There were bizarre occurrences that wouldn't leave her mind. There were doubts and hints, which were driving her impatient; if being thrown into another world wouldn't, what she had encountered today would. She needed some answers as though it could soothe her feverish mind tonight.

Quickly, she changed her attire, readied herself with warmer clothes. She walked up to the doors and carefully slid them a crack. The old maids were gone as Aoi had taken their place. The young maid was leaning against the wall next to her room, lightly snoring into the night. Eyes closed, Aoi was loosely hugging herself, her head dropped.

"Aoi… Aoi, wake up…" She knelt down beside her and shook her shoulder a bit, but the girl only shifted in her uncomfortable post, turning the other way.

Natsuki let out a sigh and walked back to her bed. She then slipped out of her room again and put the blanket over Aoi. Glancing over her shoulders in paranoia, she moved along the dark corridor and sneaked out into the garden. Quietly, she headed towards the walls, which enclosed the mansion.

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><p>Breathing out foggy breaths, Natsuki slightly panted as she climbed over the wall and landed on the street. Firm on her feet again, she tightened the black hat on her head and proceeded into the dark.<p>

There would be no company tonight, and she decided not to stay out for too long. She would love a company, and she even toyed with the idea of bringing Shizuru with her, but decided against it since the girl would have a big day tomorrow. Besides, the matter concerned her family members, and Shizuru might not like that she was prying into it. Most importantly, Natsuki didn't want to make known of any accusation against the girl's father unless she had concrete evidences.

The city plan was largely of chessboard design, and it was rather easy for her to track certain places down. Before long, she found herself at the market she visited this morning. It was dark and quiet; only a few houses in the distance still had candles lit, illuminating the dusty path through their opened windows. She walked along, looking left and right, trying to find some familiar buildings and houses.

_Ah, there it is!_

Natsuki beamed when she located Shou's medicine store. She moved towards the wooden door and raised her hand, about to knock on it. But she suddenly paused; her good eyes had caught dark stains on the door handle. The traces looked wet and fresh. She bent closer to observe it, and after a moment, her eyes widened at the realization.

_Blood._

Natsuki studied the trails of blood, which had dripped from the handle and down along the edge of the door. Her chest tightened at the heavy thoughts running through her mind. Was Shou attacked? Had she come too late? Possibly, there might be those who wanted to keep things in the dark, and right away Masaru's face entered Natsuki's mind.

Cautiously, she edged towards the window, peeking through the tiny gap. The first floor was faintly illuminated by candlelight slipping through the worn curtains, which separated the back of the store. She could see dark shapes of the wooden counter and the tall shelves, which was used to keep the dried herbs.

Just when she thought that the whole house was dead quiet, she heard the faint sound of footsteps inside. Her ears perked up. Then she saw a shadow moving behind the curtains.

"This mess again. How many times we have to go through this?"

Natsuki pressed in a little closer to the window. She was certain that it was Shou's voice. From his curt tone, he seemed well enough.

"It… It hurts…" A girl whimpered.

Natsuki glanced at the bloodied traces on the door again. If she assumed correctly, the unknown girl must have been the owner the fresh blood.

"You are risking our identities. You never learned. It is unforgivable!"

"Ah!" The girl yelped. A sound of rustling clothes and a few thuds echoed around. "Be gentle! You could have torn my arm out now!" she chided.

"Quiet! Now the whole street could hear you!" Shou huskily whispered.

After another sound of shuffling and banging happened, the girl said, "Just… Just give it to me. I'll do it myself!"

Shou let out a loud sigh. "Why did you go alone? It requires teamwork. It always does. You need your friends to help you around."

Natsuki frowned. Judging from his tone, maybe it was only Shou's daughter. But risking their 'identities'? What was it all about?

"You meant that cheesy little bitch? I'd rather go alone. She'd get me killed," the girl retorted.

Shou muttered something to himself that Natsuki couldn't make out the words, but she knew that he was upset nonetheless.

"Didn't you know? She let herself caught in a ship with that mixed scoundrel for weeks. Now, you want to talk about teamwork. I'll do fine without her," the girl continued.

Clinging to the window, Natsuki imagined that the girl was trying to dress the wound herself. Her mind ran through the events of today, and she found it almost startling to find Shou in this plight. The old man appeared benevolent and gracious, but he now seemed to live another life altogether. Then her series of thoughts came to stop at Shizuru or even herself.

_Everybody has a secret… Don't we all?_

"Mai knows what she's doing. You should learn from her sometimes," Shou said.

_M—Mai…? Wait. Did he mean—_

Out of the blue, Natsuki found a hand snatching her collar, and was pushed against the wall. Her face reddened as she tried to breathe, her body thrashing against the ruthless grip. Her hat fell to the ground as she struggled to look up at the attacker.

"Oh…? It's you again."

"M—Mai—" Natsuki gasped for air, clutching the girl's hands around her neck. Mai's grip seemed too strong for her own size.

"Right, the Fujino family. I remember now. How could I forget? Your master bought all the perfume." Mai eyed her suspiciously. "Here, I was wondering how you knew my name, and… now you will tell me everything." She then let go off Natsuki; an act seemingly kind, but the intention harsh.

Natsuki sank to her knees, hitting the ground hard. Breathing hard, she curled up into a ball, shaken by violent coughs.

"You're weak for a man," Mai noted. She grabbed Natsuki's collars again, pushed the door open and threw her inside.

Natsuki found herself rolling on the cold floor, the sound of the door shutting behind her. Out of breath, she scrambled up to her shaky feet, her back against the counter. Mai stood by the doorway, while Shou rushed out from behind the curtains. They both stared at her, and all she knew was that she was in big trouble.

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><p>Crashing along the dusty floor, Natsuki coughed at the rough fall. As much as Shou appeared gentle this morning, he was anything but right now. He had thrown her into a dark, tiny room behind his store. Quickly, he pulled her wrists and ankles back and tightened them together with a rope. At his speed, she figured that he must have known the process like the back of his hand. She wondered if she wasn't the first, and just what these people do for a living.<p>

Now, Shou was kneeling next to her. Mai stood a little further behind him, and there was another girl in tight, black garment, standing by the doorway. In the dark, Natsuki couldn't see the third assailant very clearly, but she assumed that the girl was the one injured, judging by her slightly slouched shoulders as if she were in pain.

Countless thoughts rushed through her mind like a broken dam, and she couldn't help but shudder at what they would do. Who were they? A family of murderers, thieves?

"Sh—Shou-san, it's me. I—I came with Eiji-san today. Don't you remem—"

"I remember. That is why you're tied up. Who sent you? Masaru?" Shou paused for a moment. "Eiji? Which one of them odd people? Tell me now." His gaze was cold. Any hint of kindness she had seen earlier today had all but dissipated.

"No one, I swear! I only came here to ask you a few things, and—and maybe have a cup of coffee—tea with you. I don't know anything about you, and I promise that I won't tell—"

Mai moved closer to Shou. "I ran into him today, and apparently he knew my name. He definitely knows something."

_Oh, God! This is impossible! _Natsuki cursed at her luck. Now, her best friend (from another world) had just granted her a death warrant.

Shou mildly nodded, and turned to glower at Natsuki. "Do not waste my time. Who sent you? And how did you know Mai?"

"I… Err, my name is Kuga Nobuyuki, a confidant to Fujino Eiji. It's purely coincident that I decided to visit you tonight. I was not trying to spy on you, I swear." Natsuki inwardly grumbled. Shizuru had been lenient on her spying, but these people would surely not be as kind.

"I—I just thought that you might know Yumi-san well, that is all." Natsuki didn't like the idea of being tied up in a dark room with no definite release. It could be worse though. She might not even make it through tonight. It was ridiculous to think that she had gone through hell, being transported back in time and lost everything, everyone she held dear, just to get killed right here and now for reasons unknown. She could probably blame it all on the Fujino family's mess that she was caught in, or just her being nosy and playing detective at the worst moment.

The wounded girl in black then let out a lazy sigh as she moved into the room. "Can we just kill her and get it over and done with?"

_Okay, I decide now that she's a bad, bad girl…_ Natsuki grimaced.

Shou briefly compressed his lips in annoyance. "You're going to kill an enemy's spy without interrogation? You never learned, do you?"

The black-clad girl approached Natsuki, and the familiar look in those bright eyes breaking Natsuki's trains of thoughts. In the dark, Natsuki squinted to get a clearer view. She had seen them before, but where? Was this girl another piece of the puzzle coming together? From her look, the girl was probably around sixteen, a few years younger than Shizuru. She knelt down beside Natsuki, grabbed her collars and pulled them open a little more. She then slipped her hand inside, all the while wincing at the pain on her right shoulder.

"Ah…, I knew it," she said.

"G—get your hand off me!" Natsuki blushed into deep red at the touch on her breast. The girl had deliberately left her palm there for a few seconds longer than it should.

"What?" Shou frowned.

"It's a woman." The girl turned to him, rolling her eyes. The reddish tint of her hair was reflected by the moonlight slipping through the door. "Pffffft. I could tell from her voice. You'd be a fool to believe that she was a 'Nobuyuki'." She then retracted her hand and stood up, turning to Mai. "You want to _feel_ the evidence?"

"Umm… No, thanks." Mai looked away, her arms tightened across her chest. She appeared embarrassed instead of being shocked.

"A woman in disguise." Shou pondered aloud. "Truly, what are you to him? His lover?"

Natsuki blushed hotly at the remark. "No! For God's sake, I'm just a friend of her—him! I… We…" She breathed. "I have no idea what you people do, and I'm pretty sure that he doesn't know either, or else why would he trust you to take care of his mother. Think about it. We mean you no harm."

Shou remained silent for several moments, his gaze darting around.

"It still doesn't explain how he—oh, she knew my name," Mai said.

Natsuki paused before lightly banging the side of her head against the damp floor, staring at the low table and cabinet in front of her. They looked dusty, sad and miserable to her, just like how she felt now. She had no decent explanation for knowing Mai's name, thus hopeless of being released anytime soon. If she told them the truth, they would never believe her anyway. No one would believe that she was from another world.

_But Shizuru did. _

Her heart sank at the thought. Would her life end tonight? She would never get to see her father again, would she? Was Shizuru's visit only two hours ago their last chance to see each other? With the frightful situation she was caught in now, she didn't know why it should matter.

Shou narrowed his eyes as he glowered at the captive. "How did you know? Do not try to trick me, young woman, or you will never get to see Eiji again."

Natsuki didn't have to look to feel his harsh gaze upon her. She took in a deep breath, trying to calm her nerves. "I… I was just walking around the dock, and people were talking. I don't know how to make you believe me, but that was really how I learned of her name."

"So you told him your real name?" Shou lifted his dangerous gaze up at the busty girl, who quickly looked away.

"It—it's not like they could track me down just because they know my name," Mai said.

"There were talks. She stole something, didn't she? They were expensive stuff," Natsuki added, blinking innocently. She was never a good liar, and she just hoped that it wasn't all too obvious.

Mai shook her head. "Doesn't matter. They still don't know who we are—"

"I still have to question you why you let that boy live," Shou said, his voice stern, "He had better goods to steal from, but you only opted for _perfume_."

Mai staggered for a second. "He—well, he was always surrounded by his men. It was difficult to sneak around. _And_ he doesn't know anything about us, I assure you." She then looked away at the awkward silence as displease clearly showed on Shou's face.

"We will discuss this later." Shou then leaned down, whispering in Natsuki's face. "Now, what about Yumi? What has she told you?"

"Look, if you aren't going to kill her, then just call it a night." The girl in black interrupted, sighing in exasperation. "She's probably just one of Eiji's pathetic toys. Given that she's not of noble blood, he probably just didn't want to show her around. That boy is a strange one, I tell you. He always plays safe, sometimes much more than he needs to. Right, he's a bit creepy."

Mai nodded to herself. "Yeah, but disguising her as a man to tag around in the capital is something. Eiji is probably in love with her. Maybe we could use her—"

"He's too stupid to know what love is." The younger girl rolled her eyes. "He can't even pick his own wife."

"Nobody chooses their own wife, especially not the people from your class. Now who is being stupid again?" Mai lightly chuckled.

The smaller girl turned to scowl at Mai. "Shut your mouth, or I'll shut it myself."

"Enough, both of you," Shou said with finality. "Go get some rest. We have had a long night." When the girls started to move towards the door, he glanced over his shoulder at the younger girl. "And _you_ are playing with fire. Remember that he only tries to use you."

Seemingly knowing who he referred to, the younger girl stopped by the doorway and turned to face him. She chuckled, fire in her eyes. "Using me?"

_Those… Those eyes…_ Her whole body froze, Natsuki's eyes widened at the recognition. Those bright eyes, yes, she had seen them before: only Madam Fujino, Nao Zhang, was several decades older than the redhead now in this world. While Madam Fujino sported gray hair and scars of pain, the girl possessed youthful skin and burning gaze. But Natsuki couldn't have mistaken the very same insistence and willfulness in their eyes.

Nao perked her chin up. "Nobody uses me. _I_ am using him." Her defiant tone wasn't lost to Natsuki as she turned and stalked away, Mai behind her.

Shou's stare then came to fix upon Natsuki for a moment, but she could tell by the vacant look in his eyes that he wasn't seeing her, his mind elsewhere. Perhaps, he was caught up in the trouble among his squad. As if sensing her stare, Shou suddenly snapped, glaring down at her. He pulled out a thick cloth and wrapped it around her mouth to the back of her head.

"Yumi is mine, and she will forever stay that way. No one can stop it. Not you, or him!"

Natsuki blinked in confusion, trying to decipher what all the puzzle pieces were trying to tell her. Shou shot up to his feet, stalking towards the door and slamming it behind him. Once the darkness completely consumed her view, she inwardly screamed.

_Shizuru!_


	18. C18: All Roads to One

**A/N: **Thank you** Casere **for betaing this chapter!

**A/N 2:** Finally, I've got to do the first Shiznat in 3D. Yay, a new render. You can follow the link from my profile :D

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><p><strong>Chapter 18: All Roads to One<strong>

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><p>The birds began to chirp, and shades of pink feathered with blue in the morning sky.<p>

Shizuru was properly dressed in her jade-colored kariginu. In silence, she sat by the opened doors of her bedroom, staring out into the backyard. Sakura trees stood tall. The white flowers swayed with the soft wind. Her face appeared placid, but her gaze darkened. She could find no solace in the beautiful scenery before her.

Her shoulders stiffened involuntarily as she clutched the blue scarf on her lap. She was awakened this morning by a bewildered Aoi. The maid had reported of Natsuki's absence, leaving the scarf to cover her while she was asleep in the hallway. She had been waiting since, but Natsuki still hadn't shown up. Shizuru could only hope that the raven-haired woman would return like she did the night before, unharmed. She wasn't sure if she would ever get used to Natsuki's sneaking about. Not only could it endanger the woman's life, but it could expose her own identity, and more troubles would ensue.

"Shizuru-sama… Shizuru-sama…"

Shizuru turned her head slightly, glancing over her shoulder.

It was Aoi, crawling into her room. From the look of dread on the maid's face, Shizuru couldn't help but heavily sigh. "I… I am so sorry, Shizuru-sama! Please, punish me! It is my fault that she has left the mansion—"

"It's all right," Shizuru said calmly, studying the scarf in her hand again. "She's not a prisoner. She may leave anytime she wishes. I only worry if something should happen to her…"

Frowning, Aoi shook her head. "Natsuki-san… Natsuki-san will be all right… Right?"

Turning to look at the garden again, Shizuru walled her in sigh. "I hope so."

"Shizuru-sama, the carriage is ready." Kiyoshi's voice came by the doorway.

Shizuru paused for a moment before giving a nod. She left the scarf on her bed and got up. "Thank you, Kiyoshi," she said. She strode towards the other side of the room, stepping into the main corridor of the north wing.

Kiyoshi bowed as she walked past him, but then she stopped, causing him to look up from her ankle to her face. There was a long moment of silence between them, and she knew that he had read her mind. Like always. "She's not coming back. You know that she doesn't belong here," he said simply.

Although he could be a little overprotective of her at times, she still trusted him to tell her the truth when most wouldn't. The thought dragged heavily in her heart. She did consider the theory that Natsuki might have forever gone back to her own world, vanishing like how she came into hers. Or, the woman simply escaped the mansion without the intention of returning.

_She knew about the bracelets…_

At that thought, Shizuru spun on her heels and stalked back into her room, sliding the doors shut behind her. She opened the cabinet and searched for the wooden box. She found it and held it tightly in her hands. Her heart raced as many emotions warred within her. She wasn't sure if she dared to look.

After a moment, she cracked the box open a bit, and had to sigh in relief that the pair of bracelets were still safe inside. Reluctantly, she put the box back in the cabinet and closed it. Looking blankly at the floor, she sat, chained in shame. She shouldn't have considered the possibility that Natsuki might have stolen the bracelets. They had shared a room at her aunt's house, and Natsuki didn't touch them when she had the chance. If Natsuki had truly returned to her own world, Shizuru didn't want this to be her last thought of the woman.

_How terrible of me to think of her that way…_

"Shizuru-sama… Shizuru-sama, are you all right?" Aoi's voice slipped through the doors.

Shizuru nodded to herself and got up. She walked towards the doors, sliding them open. It took her a moment to regain her composure before she turned to stare down at Kiyoshi.

"Find her." She said as she strode past him.

Kiyoshi instantly bowed until his forehead touched the floor. "I will, Master Eiji."

::

::

::

Light began to slip through the gaps between the door and windows. Natsuki was then stirred out of her slumber. It had been a cold night, and she could still feel her body shivering now even though the air had warmed up. She groaned at her cramping arms and legs, which were tied back with a thick rope. She blinked a few times to clear her head.

_Oh… I'm still alive after all…_

Amazed by the fact, she couldn't tell if she was disappointed or not. If she had died, she might have woken up and returned to her world somehow. It was just wishful thinking though. Grunting, she tried to move her limbs, but Shou's rope proved to be tight.

"Good morning!" The greeting came as the door was pushed open.

Natsuki squeezed her eyes shut at the bright light. _Ah, damn it…_ She had no idea what could make her terribly miss her comfy bed in her own room in Germany, but last night had done it. Groaning, she rolled onto her back again, while the intruder ungagged her. She immediately moved her jaw, trying to lose the cramp on her face. It took her eyes a few moments to adjust to the light. She glanced up at the figure standing beside her.

"Mai?"

The girl raised her brows and gave her a lopsided smile. "You speak my name as though you have known me for a long time."

"Maybe I have," Natsuki commented dryly, looking away.

Mai approached the old, low table and set up a bento, a cup of water next to it. "I've made some breakfast for you. You must be hungry."

"Thank you. But I'd prefer you loosen the rope a bit. I'm so sore," Natsuki griped.

"That is out of the question. Shou-san would be very upset if you are untied." Mai moved around and held up a pair of chopsticks. "Now, let's make this morning easy for both of us."

Natsuki complied. Her stomach was crying already, and she wasn't sure now if she was awoken more by the light or hunger. Quickly, she took the food Mai had made for her, lying on her side as she did so. "Mmmmm… Did… Did you make it yourself?"

"Of course." Mai grinned.

"This… is good…" Natsuki commented on the grilled squid.

"I know." Mai coyly looked away while feeding her captive faster than she intended to. "It's a simple meal, but I know it's good. Thank you."

Natsuki frowned at the girl's persistent obsession over cooking. Mai seemed to have carried her personality from what was Natsuki's past to this present, including her manic ego. Although Natsuki found it adorable, it was acutely nostalgic now. Subconsciously biting her bottom lip, she could taste the salty flavor the food had left behind, and the simple taste reminded her when she was with her friends. Those times, which she had never thought much of, now mattered greatly.

"You… You are crying…"

Natsuki snapped at the touch on her cheek, and Mai instantly retracted her hand at the fiery, emerald gaze. They both remained silent for a moment before Mai turned to grab the cup of water and began to give Natsuki some. The raven-haired woman nodded in gratefulness.

Mai set the cup aside. "So, who are you? Really, please, we could make it easy, and maybe Shou-san would let you go sooner."

Natsuki shook her head. "You would never believe me."

"Surprise me." Mai lowered herself to whisper into Natsuki's ear. "What do you know about us? How did you know my name? I don't think I have ever seen you around before that incident in the market, and I don't forget faces, Kuga." She straightened up again, a friendly, harmless smile back on her face. "Now, the truth."

Natsuki had to sigh. She was exhausted from last night, and now this. She took in a few deep breaths. This conversation was not going to produce a satisfying outcome for either of them, but she had to try. "I used to know a Tokiha Mai. She looks just like you. She sounds like you. The same hair. The same eyes. That's why I mistook you as her… And she loves cooking. Isn't that scary?"

Mai frowned, her friendly smile disappearing fast. "Do you expect me to believe that?"

"No. I told you that you would never believe me." Natsuki shrugged.

Mai eyed Natsuki up and down. "Convince me. You need to be specific."

"Oh… Let me think…" Natsuki briefly closed her eyes, trying to focus. "She has a mark on her right breast. It's some kind of a birthmark."

Blushing, Mai's arms instantly flew to hook over her own shoulders. "What—what kind of a person are you!? Do you always notice such a thing on other people?"

Natsuki's face screwed up in puzzlement. "She's my best friend, and we bathed together since we were little kids." She then stared at Mai. "Whoa. Don't tell me you have it, too? This is spooky."

The girl reluctantly lowered her hands to her lap. "It—it doesn't matter. What else? Tell me."

"She's got a sick brother she has to take care of. His name is Takumi—" Natsuki was cut short by the rough hand on her neck. She coughed as her face reddened in panic.

"Who are you!? Don't lie to me. How did you know about my brother!?" Mai's warm gaze had turned into fury. Her hand trembling as she choked Natsuki's neck.

Natsuki curled her tied legs and kicked Mai off her with full force, sending the girl crashing into the low table. She breathed hard, trying to catch her breath. "I… I'm telling you what I know! If you don't like it, then don't ask!"

Panting, Mai scrambled up to her feet, brushing her hair from her face. It took her a moment to regain her wind. She then gagged Natsuki again and straightened up. "I'll go check up on him now. If I find that something has happened to him, you can imagine today to be your last." With that, the girl spun on her heels and left the room.

_What the hell?_

Natsuki grumbled as the pain around her neck and jaw intensified. Surely, this incarnation of her best friend was stronger than her feminine look had shown.

::

::

::

Inside a private quarter, Shizuru held a folded fan to her lip, glancing around the room. The maids were moving about, serving her some rice cakes and peas. While other maids scurried behind the screen in front of her, tending to the girl on the other side of the room. They were in the west wing of the Imperial Palace, which was located north of the city, a short distance from her own mansion. She had been here many times, and every time it bored her to tears.

"I said I don't want any visitors today." The girl sounded annoyed like always, and Shizuru was certain that the girl wanted her to hear it.

Shizuru remained nonchalant, sitting quietly. This was the girl her father dreamt to be the perfect match for Eiji. It might have strengthened the Fujino family's power to rival the other powerful families, serving her father's political ambition, but Shizuru could foresee anything but perfection in this potential marriage. However, she had done nothing to protest her father. She still viewed it as Eiji's future predicament since she would be gone as soon as the deal was done. It wasn't her problem to ponder about.

"B—but the appointment h—has been made, your Royal Highness. Fujino-sama has been waiting all morning to see you," one of the maids said.

Shizuru perked her chin up a bit, studying the group of women behind the screen. They knew her well as Eiji, and they seemed to like her enough, helping her cut the line, upsetting Takeda, who had been waiting for the princess as well.

"I don't care. Make him leave. I need to rest," the princess said.

"A long night out again, Oujo-sama?" Shizuru said with a small smile on her face.

Behind the screen, the princess turned at her direction. "Be quiet. Who told you to speak?"

The maids sensed the usual spat between their master and her suitor, but it was good enough to get it all started. At least, seeing the princess actually acknowledging a visitor's presence was the most they could wish for.

Nodding to one another, the maids promptly left the room. It was almost a routine for them. They knew when privacy was needed. When the room was cleared, leaving only Shizuru and her princess, Shizuru lowered her fan and stood up. She walked up to the screen and lifted it.

"Don't come near—"

Shizuru stopped by the screen, gazing down at the girl. She momentarily stalled at the sight. The princess looked like a mess. Her red, damp hair was matted to her face and shoulders, her clothes loosened down her shoulders a little. She looked pale with dark circles under her dull eyes. A few bloodied cloths were left in a bowl next to her. A stack of clean cloths was neatly set nearby.

"What happened?" Shizuru asked in genuine concern.

The princess glared up at her. "None of your business. Go away."

Shizuru ignored the girl's order and sat down next to her. "They wanted us here so badly, so we might just submit to their wish for a brief moment as a merciful gesture."

"As if I care." The princess moved with some difficulty, grunting in pain. Shizuru took the liberty to reach out, but the girl slapped her hand away. "You are forgetting your place, Eiji."

Shizuru smiled again. "My place is right next to you."

The princess groaned. "It's what they want, but do you really want it, too? Do you want to live as they tell you? I thought you were different."

Shizuru raised her brows. If she wasn't mistaken, the princess did sound genuinely disappointed in her. _Blasphemy._ She had believed that she had delivered the perfect 'Fujino Eiji' for years. No one could tell her apart from her brother, and men and women had fallen in love with her 'Eiji'. The princess had proved to be the most difficult task she had faced.

Shizuru subtly sighed. "Ever as unorthodox you are. But, I've learned to live by the rules, Nao. It makes life easier."

"You have become like them…, and you… disgust me…," Nao grumbled as she tried to get the heavy pressure of her clothing off her right shoulder.

Unperturbed by the harsh words, Shizuru helped the girl by widening the collars. Then, she saw a piece of cloth wrapping around her slim, right shoulder, soaked in blood. She grimaced at the sight. She looked up at Nao and asked, "You surely know how to find adventures. What is it this time?"

"Must you be so inquisitive?" Nao brushed Shizuru's hands away.

"You endangered your wellbeing by going out alone at night. How many times have you come back injured?"

Nao scoffed. "A simpleminded person like you would never understand."

"You harbor such a deep disdain towards me. I wonder why you have allowed me to come into your room." Shizuru pointed out the fact with a smile.

"I didn't!"

"You didn't chase me away."

"I did, but you think so mightily of yourself that you ignored the princess' order!"

"No one could ignore your order, if you really meant it."

At Shizuru's merry chortle, Nao looked away. "You've become just like them, a nightmare to me now. If I marry you, you would become even worse. So, why marry you at all?"

Shizuru's gaze fixed upon Nao, but she wasn't really seeing anything. Maybe the princess had seen things she had failed to notice herself. What had she become during the past five years she had been masquerading as her brother? Eiji, Nao and Natsuki, they all talked of freedom, but she never really understood where it would lead them. Her father's words were the way of truth, the doctrine to success for the family. What else was there for her own life? Would it matter at all?

A frown crept over Nao's face. "Stop staring at me."

"I apologize, Oujo-sama." Looking down, Shizuru placed her hands on her lap again.

At Shizuru's suddenly distant tone, Nao let out a frustrated sigh. "Not this again. You always referred me by my name."

Shizuru slightly raised her brows. She wouldn't know how Eiji had treated Nao in the past. Even though it had been five years, she didn't dare to ask her brother as she could sense his deep-seated hatred towards her ever since their father confined him in Fuuka. She had been thrown into Eiji's world with his friends and acquaintances, and she had to immediately adjust. Nao was one of those adjustments. And, if she were optimistic, perhaps Nao would accept Eiji's proposal sooner than her own. She had no idea why her father kept Eiji away when things could have been much simpler than this.

"Hey?" Nao grasped her hand, and Shizuru jerked out of her trance.

"Yes?" Shizuru responded with wide eyes.

"You look troubled. What's going on?"

Shizuru felt the warmth surging inside of her to hear that the princess was actually concerned over her. "Many things," she said, smiling.

"Like what?" Nao winced as she tried to roll her wounded shoulder.

Shizuru chortled at how the princess had always been impatient like that. She took the opportunity to move closer. "Like what could I do to make you love me?"

Nao paused. "It is uncommon to speak of love. It's rather about the game of power, and what a marriage would bring. Have you been drinking, Eiji?"

Staring at the princess, Shizuru was astounded at her own slip. What had stirred such sentiment within her? As she had learned, love had taught her a great lesson. But then, she was probably too young to differentiate love from lust, and the incident had left a deep impression on her.

Pulling herself together, Shizuru put up a wide smile. "I am only asking you to marry me for the thousandth time."

Nao cried out in annoyance. "Two years ago, you were such a fun and carefree boy. Now, you only talk about marriage like it's the only thing that matters. It isn't. Not for me. Not for us."

Shizuru paused. After all, the princess hadn't meant that she liked the real Eiji, but Shizuru herself.

_Two years ago… _

She knew just what happened, which had left her detached and haunted. It had been when she started to distance herself from Keiko, and her best friend, Reito. It had been the sole reason she wanted to get out of the role of Eiji so badly and return to Fuuka in peace. But, could she ever find peace in Fuuka now that an intruder had spoiled it recently? She felt a deep hollow in her chest when she pondered how Natsuki was doing. The woman must be happy, joyous to return to her family and friends.

_I should be happy for her._

She sat back, staring out through the opened doors of the princess' room to the vast garden and beautiful pond. If anything, she hoped that Natsuki had happily returned to her world than to imagine the woman in any sort of danger or evil scheme.

"Oh, my, you are in love," Nao remarked, smirking.

Shizuru snapped out of her thoughts, shaking her head automatically. "That is not what a woman should imply to a man."

Nao rolled her eyes. "Have I told you that you appall me?"

"My pleasure."

"I will never marry you," Nao said, glaring into her visitor's eyes.

Shizuru smiled. "I know."

"Then why are you here?" Nao curtly pushed Shizuru's shoulder.

"Making your life miserable has become my specialty." Chortling, Shizuru stood up and headed towards the screen. She felt that she had bothered the princess enough to last for a week. She better leave before the redhead would get aggressive like the last time they saw each other.

"There…," Nao said, "There it is."

Shizuru turned to face the girl, perplexed.

Nao shook her head as if to argue with herself. "That… I don't see it very often from you these days, your real smile."

Shizuru slightly perked her chin up. "Might I presume that the princess is in love with me?"

Nao made a face as though she wanted to puke. "Pffft! Dream on!"

"Oh, my father will be very disappointed in how our meeting today ended. Would you let me return to my mansion without a satisfying report to give him?"

For a long moment, Nao looked away from the tease, chewing her bottom lip. "How… How's your arm?" the princess asked, keeping her gaze elsewhere.

Shizuru's hand shot to her arm, and she looked down. "I survived it just fine."

"I—I… I didn't—"

"It was an accident." Shizuru smiled, and it somehow softened Nao's gaze. She didn't like to see such a feisty princess stutter. That would be such a crime.

"I'm sorry. It was dark. I thought you were one of them."

"One of whom, might I ask?" Shizuru studied the girl, wondering what life Nao led behind this façade of a royal princess. Everyone had a secret, and somehow she felt safe just to think that she wasn't alone in this world with such a burden of lies to bear.

Eventually, Nao looked up at her, her usually defiant gaze filled with uncertainty. "I… I'm tired, but I want a company. It feels so lonely in the palace."

Shizuru knew exactly what Nao meant. Their mansions were full of people, visitors and servants, but it always left them cold and lonesome. As much as she wanted to go back to her own quarters, she reminded herself that Natsuki was gone, and that no one was there to wait for her. Her heart heavy, she lowered her hand that was lifting the screen up.

At the simple gesture, Nao's face brightened up. "It's almost noon. You must be hungry. I'll have them prepare us lunch."

Shizuru sat down next to the princess, and a smile slowly came across her face. "After a rice cake, yes, I am still hungry."

::

::

::

Tate Yuuichi sank back in his chair after taking a big gulp of sake. The alcohol was strong when he had very little in his stomach since yesterday. Angrily brushing his short, blond hair, he grumbled at another cup of sake, lazily leaning over a wooden table in his frequented tavern. Everyone knew him here, and he couldn't deny that he was glad to be home.

It was where the sailors and merchants patronized, while they were onshore, waiting for their next sail. Within two days after docking, he had merchants and the aristocrats lining up in interest. It had relieved him a great deal to be able to release his cargo so quickly, but the thought of a certain girl ruined all the joy he was supposed to celebrate. Unfortunately, there were only a few, rare things on earth that riches could not buy, and he wasn't exactly thrilled by the idea.

_Mai._

He grunted in annoyance. He didn't even know if it was her real name. Judging from the girl's motive, it probably wasn't. For weeks on the ship, he had sheltered her, fed her, and protected her from other horny sailors, and she repaid his kindness dearly. Stealing was unforgivable, but _her _stealing hurt him more than he could ever admit.

"A foolish man you have become, I see," a male voice remarked with an amused tone. "May I join you?"

Yuuichi lifted his head up. "Ki… Kiyoshi…? Oh… good…" Burping, he straightened up in his chair. "It's been a while. Good to see you again. How… How may I help you today?" He tried to focus again on the task at hand. Another good deal would help his mind off the thief.

"I heard that you came back only two days ago." Kiyoshi smiled, sitting down opposite to his friend.

Yuuichi adamantly nodded. "Yeah, I'm back! And, I've got tons of interesting stuff from the mainland. Tea, silk, ink—ooooh, the expensive kind the Emperor uses to pen his daily scrolls!"

"This is horrid." Kiyoshi noted the sake jars on the table. "Your stomach must be empty. You should eat something." He then raised his hand to call upon a servant boy.

Yuuichi stared at his companion for a moment, and scoffed. "You are not here because you are concerned for my empty stomach. Make it brief."

After ordering a few dishes, Kiyoshi turned to smile at the blond-haired man. "They say that you ran into my master yesterday in the streets."

Yuuichi stopped a bit in reluctance. Anything concerning the aristocrats usually came with burden, but also a high prize. "Yes?"

"He is looking for a certain person."

"And who would that be?"

"His confidant goes by the name 'Kuga Nobuyuki'. Have you seen him?"

Yuuichi frowned for a moment, his mind rushing to find any clues to the question. "A confidant to Fujino-sama…? Is he relatively short and thin-built? Dark hair and strange, green eyes?" He smirked. Yes, in the midst of the busy market, very few things could escape his sharp eyes. Mai had bumped into a young man with strange eyes; no one could forget that.

Kiyoshi nodded. "You're as resourceful as ever. That's the one. Have you seen him around?"

"Not today!" Yuuichi laughed.

Kiyoshi's appeared grim as he said, "He disappeared last night, and my master wishes to find him as soon as possible. Master is worried if something should happen to his confidant."

Yuuichi took another gulp of sake. "Abduction."

"I don't think he's of any importance," Kiyoshi said, shaking his head.

"Then he just ran away on his own will."

"Or some unfortunate event happened to him." Kiyoshi stood up and put some coins on the table. "I'm sorry that our meeting must be brief. Master could come back to the mansion anytime, and I should be there to greet him… Find the green-eyed man, and name your prize. I will be waiting for good news."

Yuuichi languidly nodded as Kiyoshi left the tavern.

Kyoto was a crowded city with tons of travelers passing by each day. It was going to be a feat to find someone. For all he knew, the man might have left the city altogether. However, the fact that his target had green-colored eyes made it a great advantage. He knew many people at the docks, and they might be able to help him.

_How much are you worth?_

Yuuichi thought back at the fallen man on the street. The raven-haired man looked bewildered, weak compared to the robust Mai, who had easily outrun him. The question didn't lie with how to find the missing man, but how to enjoy the new fortune at his hand. The Fujino family was known to be generous. He was more than confident that his circle of friends would be able to give him some information within a week.

::

::

::

After the meal, Shizuru bid the princess farewell, and proceeded to leave the private quarters. As her father instructed, she had secured another meeting with Nao tomorrow, and to her surprise, the redhead accepted the request.

The princess was tired throughout their meeting today. There were moments when she winced out loud at the constant pain, or gracelessly dipped her head in fatigue. It looked distressing, and Shizuru had to feed the girl at some point. Even though she had some confidence in the princess to take care of herself, the deep wound the younger girl had just received did worry Shizuru to some extent. Things seemed to have gotten more serious and dangerous. It wasn't just another prank like Nao used to pull. It made her wonder even more what life the princess had led outside of this palace.

As Shizuru strode through the hallways, she could hear giggles and feel the stares upon her. The aristocrats were probably talking, as usual, of her meeting with the princess. In their eyes, 'Fujino Eiji' was the best candidate to fulfill the match made in heaven: the handsome noble to tame the wild princess. Only one person would disagree, and he was sitting with a group of young noblemen, glowering at her. Surely, Takeda must have been upset that Shizuru had cut the line to meet the princess. But, they all knew that it was Nao's request, so all Takeda could do was shoot her a deadly glare.

"Takeda-san." Shizuru politely called out.

"Fu—Fujino!" Takeda's face blushed in hot anger. His fists clenched over his knees, and he sharply looked away.

Raising the tip of her folded fan to her lips, Shizuru couldn't help but chuckle. She wondered how useless this situation involving them truly was. Be it the princess, Takeda, Eiji or Shizuru herself, none of them were really in love with each other, yet they were following the paths others had thrust upon them.

Shaking her head in defeat, Shizuru left the palace with a dull heart.

::

::

::

Lying on her back, Natsuki looked up at the soft light shining through the gaps between the windows. The sun was setting. She hadn't had anything after the breakfast Mai brought her. Exhausted with thirst, she couldn't help but wonder when the girl would be back with more food and water supplies.

With her hands and ankles still tied, she grumbled at her aching limbs. Her body pained, and her spirit down. She didn't know how long she could withstand these dire conditions. Her mind would probably start to go crazy soon.

_Shizuru… _

Her eyes then widened a few moments later in bewilderment. When had the stranger become her only hope? When did she learn to rely on a stranger's kindness? Ever since her mother's death ten years ago, she had sworn to protect herself, often disregarding her father's overprotectiveness. But, in this strange world, Shizuru had easily become close to her, penetrating that lonely shell she had locked herself in.

It wasn't easy, learning what was written in the old notebook. The writer's tragic life had left a heavy feeling in her heart no matter how hard she tried to ignore it. With all her efforts, she had attempted to live day by day, following her instinct more than reasons. She had not held back. She had not penned any entry on the new notebook Shizuru gave her, defying the future that was written for her.

_It's been exactly one month…_

Today marked the thirtieth day that she had been here. She had not brought the new notebook with her, and it looked unlikely that she would be in a jolly and comfortable situation anytime soon. What was written in the old notebook could not become her future, could it?

Her head snapped. Her thoughts ceasing at the creaking sound by the door. She turned to look and saw Mai appear by the opened door. There was a moment of hesitation in the busty girl's eyes before she fully stepped inside the room and closed the door.

With some difficulty, Natsuki quickly moved closer to the girl, having smelled the food. Her dry lips parted into a small smile. Her eyes glittered in hope. As they say, a best friend would always remain a best friend (no matter which plane of time they were in).

Mai ungagged her and promptly laid out the bento and a pitcher on the low table. "I went to visit my brother… He is all right…" she muttered, and then glanced at the raven-haired girl. "You are so odd. First, you masquerade as a man. Then, you claim to know me and my brother. You even knew our names beforehand. Who are you, really?"

"I already told you. I'm from another world. Now, I'm starving. Come on." Natsuki opened her mouth wide. She nodded in gratefulness when Mai first served her some water before feeding her some rice.

"Slow down, or you'll choke yourself," Mai said.

"Yeah, then I'll die and go back to where I came from." Natsuki chewed fast, appeasing her hunger.

Mai sat back and sighed. "You think that your death will get you back to your world? Does this mean you were already dead in your other life?"

Her eyes widened at the notion. Natsuki coughed, choking at the thought. "Oh… Oh, you've got a point there… Yeah…" she mumbled. "Yeah, I was pushed off a cliff by some crazy woman, and the next thing I knew, I woke up in the Fujino mansion in Fuuka. But, if I am a ghost now, doesn't it make you all ghosts, too? How come I still have my memories from the other world—OUCH!" Natsuki yelped when Mai got up and kicked her in the shin. "What are you doing!? Are you crazy!? What was that for!?"

"To prove to you that we are not ghosts, and perhaps you are not either. You are still alive, eh?" Mai grinned.

Natsuki growled at the busty girl. "Just feed me more," she grumbled.

Mai did as told and fed her some dried fish. "Since you aren't 'Kuga Nobuyuki', what's your real name?"

"Natsuki. Natsuki Kruger." Natsuki motioned her face to urge Mai to feed her faster, in which the girl chortled in return.

"Kroo-err-jer? Even your name is strange."

Her cheeks bobbling, Natsuki rolled her eyes. "Just call me 'Natsuki'."

Mai nodded. "I actually think you are pretty harmless, Natsuki. Maybe Shou-san will release you soon."

Natsuki's mudded, pretty face broke into a childlike smile. "Really—"

"I see you two are getting along pretty well," Shou's voiced interrupted.

Natsuki and Mai then turned to see him coming through the door. He stopped in his tracks to study his captive for a moment, and then glared at his apprentice.

"You're always too kind to strangers. It's going to hurt you one day," Shou said.

Mai retracted her chopsticks from Natsuki's mouth and looked down.

"I will release you eventually, because you are much more valuable to me inside the palace than rotting in my rooms and wasting my food and water," Shou said.

"Really, Shou-san!?" Natsuki beamed. "Thank you! Thank you so much, Shou-san!"

"But, on one condition." Shou walked to the window and looked out. After letting out a sigh, he turned to smile at her. "You will have to become one of us first."

_What the hell does this guy mean?_ Natsuki froze.


	19. C19: Return to Me

**A/N: **Thanks to **Casere**, beta of the chapter! I have changed a few things after she sent me the final version. So the mistakes are all mine (they're mine!).

And, why do I see a sudden surge of Shiznao fans XD

Oh, one important thing is I have no words to describe whenever a reader/reviewer just randomly mentioned 'Nostalgia' and how they liked it. It just made me really happy, since I thought that not many had read or even liked the fic :D

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><p><strong>Chapter 19: Return to Me<strong>

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><p>The sky was clear, and the wind was soft. The colorful leaves of autumn adorned the trees, while some blanketed the ground. Riding on a black horse, Nao was seated in front of Shizuru, leaving their maids and guards far behind. Her request to go for a ride with Shizuru this morning had caused a huge ruckus, but nothing could stop her. She always got what she wanted in the end.<p>

"You're humming. You seem to be in an awfully good mood today," Nao remarked, glancing slightly at the person behind her.

Shizuru smiled, letting their horse trot along the vast plateau. "As long as you do not deny me."

"Oh, I can, and I will."

Shaking her head, Shizuru chortled. "It doesn't look like it since you're here with me. The city must be talking about us now, and all the other suitors might be turning their attention to someone else as we speak."

"Wouldn't that be great? They're so annoying." Looking away, Nao puffed.

"You will have to marry sooner or later. How long did you think this can go on? I cannot be used as an excuse to fend them off forever."

The princess frowned. "No one can force me to marry, and I… I don't see you as an excuse."

Shizuru smiled wider. "My father would be pleased to hear that."

Upon hearing the retort, Nao felt heat rushing to her face. "Can you stop talking about your father for once? I won't be used as a means for your family to gain more political power." She turned to glare back at her servants some distance away. "I don't want to ride anymore. I want to go back. _Now_!"

Shizuru gave the horse a small kick on its side, and it promptly galloped even farther away from the servants.

When the horse gradually came to a stop, Nao rolled her eyes, and turned to scowl at the person behind her. "Did you not hear me—" But she froze when her lips were caught with Shizuru's own. She froze, her eyes wide open. Her slim shoulders trembled slightly as her mind reeled. The warmth from her suitor lingered, enveloping her like nothing had ever succeeded before.

_So… So soft—_

"NO!" The princess pulled back. She furiously shoved Shizuru, but lost her balance.

"W—wait—" Shizuru grabbed Nao's arm, trying to pull her up. But, the princess struggled even harder to lose her grip, causing them both to fall off the horse. "Ouch!" Shizuru yelped.

While Shizuru clumsily scrambled up to her feet, picking up her black hat from the ground, Nao had quickly jumped to her feet, and hopped on to the horse herself.

Out of breath, Shizuru stared wide-eyed up at the princess, whose face appeared as red as a tomato now. A princess being able to get on a horse by herself was something new.

Glowering down at her suitor, Nao gripped the reins so hard her knuckles went white. "How dare you!?"

Shizuru blinked a few times, momentarily forgetting that there were leaves scattered on her shoulders and clothes. "You… You have never been kissed?"

"What—that is—is—shameless! You are a despicable man! Disgusting!"

Shizuru moved a few steps closer, so that she was standing next to the horse. "You are sixteen years old, and you have never kissed? Here I thought that you might have a lover or two for continuing to refuse me like this—"

"I hate you!" Nao lifted her leg and gave a kick right at Shizuru's chest with all her might. Once again, she caught the aristocrat off-guard.

Shizuru fell to the ground, and coughed violently. Gasping for breath, she scooted away from the princess' vicinity.

"Oujo-sama!? Are you all right!? What happened!? Is something wrong, Oujo-sama!?" A maid rushed to the horse's side, followed closely by a group of guards.

Two guards helped Shizuru back on her feet, horror on their faces.

Nao glowered down at her suitor, and the shocked, baffled look on Shizuru's face only aggravated her more. She then screamed at the top of her lungs. "Take me back to the palace now!"

* * *

><p>In her white yukata, Shizuru laid down on her bed, rubbing her chest a little.<p>

Moving about on her knees, Aoi entered the room and slid the door shut behind her. She was holding a vessel of warm water. As she moved beside the bed, her face was twisted with worry. She offered a wet towel for her master.

"Thank you, Aoi." Shizuru took the towel and cleaned her face with it.

"You don't look so well, Shizuru-sama."

"Yes, she's much stronger than expected for a girl of such petite size. I wouldn't be surprised if she knows martial arts." Shizuru chuckled, shaking her head in amusement. "I wonder how Eiji will handle her once they are married."

Aoi bit her bottom lip. "It may have been just a kick, but you seem so exhausted."

Shizuru looked up and smiled at her servant. Over the years that they had spent together in Kyoto, Aoi had become more than just a servant, but more of a little sister to her. "I'm just tired," she reassured.

"It's been three weeks since Natsuki-san disappeared. And, you haven't slept well at all since then. Some nights, I can see your room candle-lit until dawn. Do you still hope that she will come back?"

At the mention of Natsuki, Shizuru looked away. She knew her hands were a little shaky, and she quickly put the towel aside. Even though she had tried to console herself in believing that it was for the best, Shizuru had found it becoming harder and harder with each night that had passed, trying in vain to ignore the absence of her dark-haired friend. Natsuki appeared and then disappeared as abruptly as a chaotic, confusing dream. And, all the doors to the secrets of the old notebook were sealed once more. Perhaps, she would never know the truth.

"I just want a proper goodbye. That is all I want," she said, looking away again.

Aoi scratched her face a little. "Do you… Do you really believe that she's from another place and time like she had claimed?"

Shizuru glanced at her servant.

"K—Kiyoshi told me stories about how she first appeared inside the Fuuka mansion. Uh… He doesn't dare tell anybody else, I assure you, Shizuru-sama. I don't think he would want the others to think that you have a s—strange person as a friend."

Briefly closing her eyes, Shizuru let out a tired sigh. "She is, indeed, strange, but… I believe her. She must have gone back to her own world, wherever that is."

"Then will she be able to come back here again?"

Shizuru paused. It was the question she feared for its answer. If Natsuki could not control how she transported through time, it was likely she wouldn't be able to come back even if she wanted to. "I don't know, Aoi… I don't know…" she murmured almost to herself.

Every time Shizuru closed her eyes and tried to sleep, those deep, emerald eyes would flash in the dark, haunting her and captivating her. Then, the delicate skin and the pair of pink, full lips she had secretly desired to touch. For weeks, she had attempted to focus on Eiji's marriage outlook. She had thought that Natsuki would eventually disappear from her mind, but the longing just worsened each day.

_Come back to me… _Shizuru immediately grimaced at the sudden thought in her head.

"Shizuru-sama!"

At the voice coming through the door, Shizuru quickly sat up. Thrill flashed across her slightly widened eyes. "M—Midori?"

The door slid open, revealing the redheaded woman. Midori was sitting on her heels, a big grin on her face. "I'm back! Have you missed me!?"

"Midori-san!" Aoi beamed.

Midori winked at the young maid, but her smile disappeared as soon as she turned to study Shizuru. She, then, quietly slid the door shut and moved her knees to sit next to the bed. "Why are you in bed this afternoon? Are you ill again?"

"There was an accident—"

"Another accident?" Midori firmly picked up Shizuru's arms and inspected her master. "Are you hurt anywhere? Who did this? Was it the same one who injured your arm about a month ago?"

At Midori's stare, Shizuru bit her bottom lip, but then sighed in defeat. "Yes, it's the same person. But, you can't do anything about it anyway. It's Nao Oujo-sama who did it."

"What!?" Midori's mouth hung open. "W—why didn't you tell me it was her?"

"Because it was really an accident. She thought I was someone else attacking her, so I didn't want to worry you about it. And, today… Well, she kicked me in the chest. She sure is a strong girl." Shizuru rubbed her bruised chest again, sulking.

Midori's wide eyes flickered between her master and Aoi. "Why did she kick you? Kiyoshi had been sending me news about you getting along with the princess just fine. But this?"

Shizuru looked away briefly. "I… I kissed her."

Aoi blushed furiously, while Midori's eyes bulged in distress.

Shizuru ran her hand through her unkempt hair. "I'm pretty certain that she has taken a liking to 'Eiji', so I… I sort of wanted to hurry things along. I wanted to make sure that Takeda Masashi wouldn't be a threat anymore."

Midori let out a frustrated shriek. "Now, that Takeda boy might have thank you for what you've done! What were you thinking…!?" She, then, frowned. "Ah, I've heard about that woman's disappearance. Look what she's done to you, making you act so irrationally

"Irrational?" Shizuru straightened up, but immediately regretted the move as a sharp pain stung her chest again. Grumbling, she bent a little as an attempt to ease the pain.

Midori nodded adamantly, her gaze accusing. "Yeah, you have done absurd things like allowing that woman to stay at Fuuka mansion, _and_ then refusing Kiyoshi to take her back to the island when she was caught on the boat. He told me everything. You cannot hide it from me."

"But you can be sure that Natsuki-san will not betray us. She's a kind woman," Aoi quickly said as though she was afraid of more of Midori's accusations against their master.

"Ah! You, too!?" Midori pulled her hair in exasperation. "She cannot be trusted! Her appearing inside Fuuka mansion is extremely odd, almost too calculating. Her disappearance in Kyoto after arriving shortly after is also odd! Everything about that woman is odd! Even her eye color is odd! She's definitely a spy!" She pumped her fists. "But, do not fret, Shizuru-sama! I will find her and kill her. All our problems will be solved!"

"No…! I…" At her own outburst, Shizuru immediately looked away, clutching the hem of the blanket. "I mean, I don't think she's betrayed us. It's likely that she's gone back to her own world."

For a long moment, Midori just studied her master. "I don't believe that. But, I truly hope that she's gone back to wherever she said she's from. We cannot risk having her around anymore," she said, her tone darkened.

Shizuru shook her head slightly. "She wouldn't be a threat at all if Eiji was here. That's why I want the marriage to happen soon…" Then, she glanced at Midori. "How is he doing?"

"Nothing to worry about. I only wish that he had asked the same about you. He has no idea what you have to sacrifice to fill his role."

Shizuru tightened her hold on the blanket. "But, I understand him. I would have hated him if he did the same to me. Nobody would want to be locked up and their freedom taken away. It's not a life to live."

"After all these years, he should realize that it's not your fault," Midori said.

"It's not his fault either that he doesn't want to marry the one according to father's wish. I wouldn't want to be with the one I do not love either."

Midori and Aoi exchanged another glance, both smiling a little.

Shizuru frowned at her subordinates. "What have you two found so amusing?"

Ticking her chin with an index finger, Midori raised her brows. "It's just… It's the first time you speak of freedom, Shizuru-sama. You were always willing to follow the rules."

At that, Shizuru just looked blankly at them. She had always obeyed her father's wishes, and had never really taken the time to sympathize with her brother's situation. Something must have changed and ignited her yearning, that strange thing called 'freedom'.

* * *

><p>"Ahhhhhh! Enough!" Natsuki hollered as she tossed the water-filled buckets away, panting. In her soiled, brown yukata, she had her raven hair pulled up into a loose bun. Sweating like mad, her face was muddied, and her arms were shaking.<p>

For the past few weeks, she had been ordered to clean Shou's store every day. As if the tasks weren't enough, she had also been forced to five hundred pushups a day, carrying two heavy buckets whilst running for two hours, three more hours of sparring with Mai, and kicking and punching the sandbags in the backyard until dusk. Her whole body ached. Her knuckles split, bleeding, opening new wounds every day. Her shins were bruised beyond black.

"Oh, don't be so sulky. I know it's daunting, but it helps you to be fitter. See? Your arms are much more tone than before. Your punches and kicks are improving in strength. You're doing great," Mai said, smiling. She was sitting on top of a stack of sandbags.

"Shou-san told me that he… that he'd release me…" Wheezing, Natsuki angrily wiped the sheen of sweat from her face. "And that was three weeks ago! He lied, didn't he!? Why are you people making me do this? Are you all crazy!?"

Mai merrily kicked her feet in the air before jumping down to the ground. She walked up to Natsuki and offered her a cup of water. "I'm so sorry, Natsuki-chan. It's just because we've been waiting for our reinforcements. Two of our associates will arrive tonight, hopefully sticking to their schedule this time. They've been on a trip in mainland China. But, once we accomplish our upcoming mission, you can go back to Fujino-sama. If Shou-san tries to hold you back again, I'll be sure to scold him for that!"

Natsuki stopped at the mention of Shizuru. It had been wishful thinking that Shizuru would find her here. If she was lucky, Shizuru might take her back again. Or, perhaps, it was destined this way. Perhaps, the road ahead would be as unpredictable as a dream. And, she would move on and find some other clues to her being sent here in the first place. Her path might never cross with Shizuru again.

Unbeknownst to Natsuki, Mai had taken a long look at her, smiling. "How well do you know Fujino-sama?"

"What—why do you ask?" Natsuki picked up the two empty buckets in the middle of the backyard and flipped them down.

"It's just that it's rather unusual for a commoner like you to be able to get close to a noble like that."

Natsuki sat down on the left bucket, rubbing her face with both aching hands. "I just… I woke up one day and found myself in the Fuuka mansion. You know, the mansion on that island up north?"

"Of course, I have heard of it. And?" Mai sat down on the adjacent bucket, keeping her gaze on Natsuki.

"I had no money, and I had no idea how to get home. She—h—he was kind enough to shelter me. I tagged along with him to Kyoto. I was just trying to find my way back home."

Mai gave her a confused look. "Yeah…? With you dressed as a man?"

"It—it was just for my own safety. He figured that roaming about as a man might be safer for me."

"As a complete stranger to him, he sheltered you, gave you money, and was worried for your safety. _Uh-hah!_"

Her brows pulled together in curiosity. Natsuki turned at her companion. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"He is as kind as they say, _and_ he's also such a beautiful man."

"B—b—beautiful…? Uh… Y—yeah, I guess so," Natsuki involuntarily stuttered. To think of it now, she couldn't argue with Mai on Shizuru's beauty. One had to be blind not to notice it.

Mai just chortled. "You are blushing!"

"What—no! It's just so warm now after you made me do all that crazy stuff," Natsuki said, curtly looking away.

"I find it interesting that he has been especially kind to you. Maybe, he is feeling something for you. After all, you're a very pretty woman."

Natsuki automatically frowned. "Huh?" Mai's compliment was far from the first that Natsuki had received, but something else struck her as odd.

_But Shizuru and I are both women… _

Then, the thought of Keiko flitted across Natsuki's mind, not to mention Lady Kitahara, whom they bumped into weeks ago. Certainly, there was something going on between Shizuru and Kitahara, and it wasn't exactly innocent as far as Natsuki could sense. She now blushed even deeper at the thought. "It—it's impossible! We're just friends. I—I would never think such a thing about him. Never!"

"I was talking about his feelings for you, not yours for him."

"Oh, yeah…" Natsuki slapped her own forehead. "God, can we talk about something else?"

Covering her mouth with a hand, Mai giggled. "As you wish, Natsuki-chan!"

Natsuki grumbled, but was thankful that the topic was dropped. She turned to Mai again. "So we're waiting for two more people? To do what exactly?"

"Shou-san will brief us on the details tonight. It's going to be fun," Mai said, beaming.

"I don't think Shou-san represents anything remotely close to being 'fun'." Natsuki frowned quizzically. "Where did that girl go? I haven't seen her around lately."

"Who?"

"The brat. That tiny girl I saw that night."

It took Mai only a few seconds to realize. "Ah!" She, then, laughed. "She doesn't live with us. She's out of our league. She's much busier than we are, actually."

"What do you mean?" Natsuki pulled at her yukata, needing all the chilly air she could get to cool herself after all the exercise from earlier.

"Nao is a princess, and she's the one Fujino-sama is courting. She's been busy lately with her outings with him, I think."

Natsuki paused upon hearing it. "A princess?"_ So that girl is the one Shizuru's father wants for Eiji?_

Mai clasped her hands together, nodding. "But, don't worry. She doesn't love him, which is utterly perplexing to the whole city. She's a weird girl like that. She told me that she's just using him to fend off other suitors. She said that she'd never marry just to serve her family's request."

Natsuki scratched her head a bit. "But… but they must be a perfect match. Why doesn't she like him? Is she in love with someone else?"

For a brief moment, Mai stared at her, blinking in confusion. "You want them to marry?"

"Yeah, why not?" The news only brought hope to Natsuki. If only Nao would agree to marry, Shizuru would be freed sooner.

"Well, Nao likes her life with us, and that's why she's become one of The Protectors." Mai playfully pinched Natsuki's nose, causing the woman to back away, blushing. "And, you are our newest member!"

"What Protectors? What?" Natsuki gulped down some more water from the cup.

Mai promptly refilled the cup with water from a jar placed near her feet.

"Thanks," Natsuki said.

Mai quietly put the jar down and turned to fully face Natsuki with a proud smile. "We are The Protectors. Shou-san founded the group many years ago, and there have been several members before us. It is the noblest thing we could have ever achieved in our lives, Natsuki-chan. We take gold and goods from the rich, and give them out to the poor."

"Thieves, you mean?" Natsuki shrugged. "Never mind. Go on."

"Shou-san is our leader, and with his connections in the royal circle, he can easily learn of the routes and times the cargos would travel."

Natsuki raised her brows at Mai's excited tone. _A doctor and his merry band of thieves. Great._

"It's a dangerous thing we do, but we're doing it for the sake of the people. The poor are being taken advantage of by the rich, and we only want to balance things out as best we can."

Natsuki chuckled, running her hand through her hair. This small group of people seemed to be ahead of their time. Freedom. Equality. Better opportunities. But, things wouldn't change much until a thousand years from now, and that fact only caused her to sympathize with their efforts. In the end, they all were just nameless souls along the endless course of history. What a waste.

"Can't you just ask your princess friend for the money? Isn't her family the one who is taking everything from the poor that you guys are trying to save?"

"Nao alone can't change it."

"And with you—what, five people? You think you can change anything?"

Mai shook her head. "Even if it's a small hope, we could make a change. They fear us. The officials, or even the bandits, they all have heard of us. We've chased outlaws away from several villages. It's terrible for the villagers to live with such fears. The officials aren't doing much to uphold order."

"Hmm. What if you got caught?" Natsuki secretly entertained the idea of escaping, and telling an official that she had been kidnapped. They might be able to help her.

"The punishment for stealing is death. So, don't get caught, Natsuki-chan. I'll be sure to keep you close on our mission."

At that, Natsuki narrowed her eyes, handing the empty cup to Mai. "You have sake?"

* * *

><p>The sun was setting, but Takeda Masashi found himself with a loss of appetite. His dinner was laid out on a low table, untouched. Worries furrowed his thick brows as he looked out at the darkening sky beyond the opened doors of the room.<p>

"My master is troubled."

Takeda glanced at the man with white, short hair. "Nagi," he quietly regarded.

Nagi was a small man in his early thirties. However, due to an illness he received when he was a child, his hair had grown white in his youth. Even though his body was miniature at best, his piercing eyes glowed vibrantly like an angry fire in the dark. He was a close confidant to Takeda, having watched the boy grow up. On his knees, he moved closer to his master.

"What is it, my master?"

Takeda clenched his fists on his lap, looking down at the tatami floor. "I… I think I've lost to him. Nao Oujo-sama only wishes to see him now. She hasn't received any of my visits for the past four days. And—and this morning, she had a ride with him!"

To his surprise, his servant only laughed. Takeda looked up at Nagi, his gaze burning with fury. "Are you finding my misery funny? I've lost the chance to secure the marriage, and now the Fujino family will gain more political power alongside the Fujiwara family! I've let my father down!"

The smile still on his face, Nagi shook his head. "It's far from over, Masashi-sama. The princess is too wild, so she isn't likely to marry anytime soon… Not to mention, she certainly cannot marry a dead man, can she?"

Nagi winked.

Takeda froze, his mouth gaping. "Are you… But—n—no, it's not a fair fight!"

"Fairness?" Nagi giggled, his conniving smile betraying his feigned innocence. "You and that flimsy boy do not even love that bizarre girl, and she does not love any of you. It's all about games of power. It's either for his family or _your_ family."

Takeda shot up to his feet, red in his face. "You are a disgrace, Nagi! I'll win the princess's heart on my own! I'll prove that I am better than Fujino Eiji, and I will not resort to foul play!" With that, he stalked out of the room, leaving his servant behind.

Nagi just watched his master disappear down the corridor. When all was quiet again, he sat down on the matted floor, holding his ankles with both hands. His shoulders relaxed. Taking a pair of chopsticks, he picked up a piece of pickled fish and fed himself the meal Takeda had left behind.

"Hmm…" Closing his eyes while chewing, Nagi smiled even wider at the taste of food on his tongue.

_Such an honest boy, my master._

* * *

><p>With a few lamps lit around the basement, they were cramped up in the humidified chamber just below the cabin, where Natsuki had been sleeping.<p>

In the middle of the circle, Shou was sitting on his heels, his left arm resting on his left knee. His eyes were wide with energy and enthusiasm. His voice was loud and strong. Pointing his thick fingers along the spots on the crumpled, roughly drawn map spread on the floor. He explained the route which they would attack a convoy tomorrow night.

Nao was present tonight. She was clad in a black, tight garment like a ninja. A black cloak wrapped around her head and down to her neck, completely covering her hair. Sitting upon on a stack of sandbags on the opposite side of the room, she crossed her legs, and her arms across her chest. Unlike the other members, her posture was regal and refined, suggesting her upper class upbringing. While Shou continued to elaborate the strategies, Nao's piercing gaze was fixed upon Natsuki through the entire meeting.

Sitting next to Mai, Natsuki averted her eyes from the princess, unsure what had caused the silent glower. She instead tried to focus on Shou's plan, deciphering what she should do as not to get herself killed or caught in this mess. What a group of an old man, a princess, three ninjas, and a college student like her, could possibly do to a caravan of forty, young men? It sounded like a suicide mission, but Shou and his gang seemed eerily confident with their firm nods and placid faces.

"We make it quick. Get as much as we can and get out. Kill anyone who poses a threat to you," Shou said, pounding his fist on the map.

"I thought we were supposed to kill them all. Why leave a chance that they might catch us later?" Nao droned, turning to Shou.

"Not again! Killing everyone is outrageous! With your recklessness, you're going to get us all killed!" The blonde woman sitting next to the princess blurted out.

Natsuki's head snapped when she heard the woman for the first time. _She sounds so familiar…_ She squinted to get a clearer look at the black clad woman. Recognition, then, hit her.

The woman's physical appearance remarkably reminded Natsuki of the fearsome principal of Natsuki's college: Haruka Armitage. Only Ms. Armitage was already in her mid-fifties, while this reincarnation of her was about the same age as Natsuki herself. But, their feistiness and loudness resembled each other down to a tee. Natsuki had only encountered Ms. Armitage once, and it had been due to her being called in and reprimanded for her Ducati's invalid parking space. Natsuki had thought that it was trivial, but nothing could ever escape Ms. Armitage's eyes.

"Oh, you are staring, young woman!" Haruka turned to bark at Natsuki.

Natsuki flinched, involuntarily leaning closer to Mai, who chortled in return. For some reason, she felt like she was in the principal's office again.

Without further scrutiny, Haruka turned her attention back to their leader. "And, why must we take this weakling with us? She'll only slow us down! Not to mention, she's a foreigner. She might even get lost in the woods!"

At that, Mai playfully nudged at Natsuki's shoulder, winking. "Just stay close to me, Natsuki-chan."

It was dark, but Natsuki caught the brief glance Shou exchanged with Nao. The man, then, stood up. He folded the map and hid it beneath the layers of his clothes.

"She's a friend of the Fujino family. We could use her for some information. But, we must make sure that she will be one of us first, so that she won't betray us later," Shou said.

Natsuki inwardly cringed. _What information? Is it about Shizuru's mother…?_

Haruka arrogantly shrugged. "Make Nao marry that boy then, and you could get all the information you need."

"How insolent of you! I will not marry for information!" Nao scowled at her comrade.

"You will not marry for anything. Nothing pleases you, princess," Haruka puffed.

"Oh, what do you know about marriage!?"

Both Mai and Natsuki just sighed as the pair continued to argue with each other. Then, Natsuki's gaze shifted to the last remaining member, who had been quiet all night.

"If that is all, I would like to take my leave now. I'm rather tired from the long trip." The woman spoke, standing up to adjust her black clothes.

Natsuki's ears pricked up, but she couldn't recognize the voice at all.

Shou nodded to the woman. "All right. This is all for tonight. Go get some rest. It's going to be a big day tomorrow. We'll meet here precisely at dawn." He, then, led the way out, and the rest followed him.

Mai put out all the lamps as she was the last to leave the basement.

When the others had left the cabin, Natsuki sat down on the thin, ragged futon, which Mai had given her to sleep on since her second night here. Automatically, she held out her hands and ankles. Her gaze started to drift away. Her mind began to revolve around the things and people she had met in this world. Tonight was just another painful reminder of her journey here. She kept running into people she had met or known before in her own world. But, why was she the only one who had the memories from the other life? What was everything trying to tell her?

"…tsuki… Natsuki…?"

Eventually, Natsuki was snapped out of her thoughts at the call. She looked up to see Mai already kneeing in front of her. Mai was tying knots around her wrists and ankles with the ropes, a ritual they had grown accustomed to over the past few weeks. However, Mai had loosened the ties much more now, allowing Natsuki some comfort while sleeping.

"I was calling out your name a couple times now. What were you thinking? Are you afraid of tomorrow's mission?"

"Uh—well…" Natsuki found her throat dry. She shrugged tiredly. "Yah, I guess. I don't know what Shou-san wants from me. I'm not some bandit or ninja fighter, or—or even a freedom fighter. I don't know why he wants me there… Can you tell me what's really going on?"

Mai kept silent for a moment. "Don't worry, Natsuki-chan. This will be the last night you'll have to sleep here. I'll bring you back safely, and then you can go back to Fujino-sama, I promise." She scurried to the other side of the room, and spread out a folded futon and a worn blanket. "I'm staying with you here tonight!" she said, grinning.

Natsuki couldn't help but smile. But, her heart ached with memories rushing back at her. How she used to sneak into Mai's room at night when they were just children, excited and fearful if Madam Fujino would find out. Those nights seemed like a dream. Her life now seemed like a nightmare.

"You've always been kind to me, Mai… And, I mean the other 'you', too."

Mai looked baffled for a second, but kept the motherly smile Natsuki had always loved. "A friend will always be a friend, I guess."

They both laid down on their futons, warmed in the blankets. Faint moonlight slipped through the gaps between the windows, allowing them some vision in the dark. Natsuki turned to lay on her side to face her friend, and Mai did the same.

"I…" Natsuki started, but her words trailed off.

"Yes, Natsuki?"

Slowly, Natsuki curled into a ball as much as the ropes would allow her. "I knew Nao and Haruka before. In my own world… I just can't understand why."

"Nao and Haruka?" Mai blinked in surprise, lifting her shoulders a bit.

"Yeah, the Nao I knew is an old woman now. She was my mother's boss, and I used to live in her mansion until I was ten years old. As for Haruka, I wasn't close to her. She was in charge at my school, but still… I don't understand why I am the only one with memories…" Natsuki grimaced, her heart heavy. While she possessed the memories, it made her the only one who suffered from it as well. Perhaps, it would be better not to remember?

Mai lightly chuckled. "Have you met Shou-san before in your own world?"

Natsuki shook her head at once. "Nope. But, if I ever get the chance to go back and see him there, I'll be sure to stay the hell away from him."

"I'm sure." Mai giggled. "What about Fujino-sama?"

The question rang quietly in Natsuki's mind, and she found it hard to explain.

_No…_

"No. It's weird, isn't it? Why did I wake up in his mansion of all places, if he was just a stranger to me? I should have woken up in your home instead." Involuntarily, Natsuki felt the cold on her skin so acutely now. It had ruthlessly replaced the warmth she recalled when she slept next to Shizuru that one night.

Mai nodded as if to convince herself of something. "Do you believe in reincarnation?"

Natsuki automatically moped. "What? No."

"Life. Death. Rebirth. We die and become someone else, and we meet again in the next life."

Natsuki sighed. "I find the concept really hard to grasp. It's more like a consolation."

"But, what else could explain how you knew us before? It's uncanny!" Somehow, Mai looked really excited about the idea.

Her body shivered from the exhaustion from today's workout. Her eyelids were heavy. Natsuki lifted her defeated gaze at the lines of moonlight streaming through the windows.

_Then why don't I know Shizuru from before…?_

As her mind slowly registered the question in her head, Natsuki eventually blushed at the thought. Shizuru shouldn't have mattered to her at all. The girl was just someone who had sheltered her in this strange place. Shizuru might not hold any meaning to her being here at all.

"Well, Natsuki-chan, I think that there must be something calling out for you, and that's why you came back." Mai, then, growled lightly to herself. "Oh, my! Does that mean I am just a past now?"

Natsuki stifled her yawn, rubbing her eyes with her wounded knuckles. "We do not get reborn. People just die. Now, go to sleep."

"But, I believe that there are things that we cannot explain."

"Everything, if it's something, can always be explained."

"You are very odd, Natsuki-chan. I've never met anyone quite like you before," Mai said, almost pouting.

Natsuki lazily groaned. A deep sleep was just a reach of an arm away, and her exhausted body was begging for it. "If you insist, can you explain why I'm the only one who came back? I could have brought the other 'you' with me, eh? You would've loved to meet your twin."

Mai raised her brows in question. "It is believed that if a soul could not be at peace in death, it would continue to haunt certain places. Maybe. Just maybe, you couldn't let go, Natsuki... I just hope that maybe you'd find out what you have come back for."

Just when her eyes were about to close, Natsuki froze at the sudden notion.

_The mysterious writer?_

As unwelcomed and capricious as it was, Maria's words slowly crept into her mind, echoing distantly in her awareness, warring with her fears and suspicions. It was almost too easy. When she was at her most vulnerable state, every little thing which had happened in the past would catch up with her, hammering its existence into her consciousness, leaving deep imprints in her soul.

'_It is scarier when you cannot remember whom you cherish.'*****_

Natsuki's gaze flickered in the dark, not knowing what or where she was looking at, or what she was searching for. Perhaps, it wasn't everyone else who had no memories. Perhaps, it was she who had forgotten. Something must have called for her. Someone.

* * *

><p>"Shizuru-sama… Shizuru-sama, are you asleep…?"<p>

Shizuru looked up at the call by her bedroom's door. The blanket was pulled up to her waist. She was in her fresh, dark violet yukata, ready to go to bed. Sitting up, she frowned at Aoi's whisper.

"What is it?"

"M—may I come in?"

"Yes, Aoi."

The door slid open and Aoi slipped in. Moving on her knees, the maid approached her master, a faint blush on her cheeks. She then handed Shizuru a folded paper. "It's from Amaterasu Theater."

Shizuru raised her brows in puzzlement and received the paper. "Thank you."

"Shizuru-sama," Aoi said, bowing.

Shizuru remained still until her maid left the room. With the lone candle lit in the room, she carefully unfolded the paper. Keiko had not contacted her since that night the singer openly tried to seduce her. The woman must have been worried of their friendship. If it was a friendship, Shizuru wasn't even sure of it anymore.

_Meet me at the shrine tomorrow night after the show is over. The matter is very important. I will not leave until you come._

Shizuru's hand dropped to her lap. Keiko had never sounded so desperate like this, and fear gripped her.

After Eiji was confined in Fuuka, Keiko was the first friend Shizuru was able to get accustomed to. With delightful smiles and kind gestures, the singer had posed no threat to Shizuru's still new, untrained disguise. They had strolled along Kamo River, visited the markets, or stayed out late at night at the shrine. For some time, Shizuru had thought that their relationship had picked up from where Eiji had left off. She had learned that Keiko had made love with her brother before, and she had only wanted to try and keep the beautiful bond between them, waiting for her brother's return.

However, life had become much more complicated as years passed by. Keiko had grown closer to her. Their relationship had demanded more, but Shizuru knew that she was not allowed to indulge in them. As life refused to get any easier, she was torn by what had happened between them, which shouldn't have been there from the start. It had felt too familiar. It had repeated itself like a vicious cycle of self-inflicted pain upon the same old wound. Like what she had with the princess, Shizuru knew that it was all for Eiji.

_But, where does Fujino Shizuru stand…?_

Her jaw clamped shut. Shizuru clutched the paper so hard that her hand trembled. She flung the crumpled piece across the room.

For the past five years, everyone who professed to love her actually didn't. That love was meant for Eiji. Fujino Shizuru did not even exist as she was locked away, hidden far beyond the walls of Fuuka mansion. Shizuru wasn't sure if she would ever find herself again when the time came. She wasn't sure at all who or what was left behind the confinement.

* * *

><p><em>* Maria's quote from chapter 2<em>


	20. C20: Crescent Moon

**A/N:** No beta. Due to health issues, **Casere** cannot beta anymore. I wish her all the strength to go through this. Yeah...

And, it's becoming really difficult to switch between 'Legend' and 'Until', considering their different genres. Not to mention that this chapter turned out to be much longer than I expected. =_=

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 20: Crescent Moon<strong>

The night had been restless. Her teeth gritted, Natsuki was lying on her side. Her hands balled up underneath the blanket. Behind her shut eyelids, the only thing she could see was the murky vision of the sea of sakura leaves. Its wave crashed against her, one after another, suffocating her. She wanted to swim away. She wanted to leap for air. Her heart beat faster against her chest as she fought to move her body, but failed even to let out a cry.

She began to quiver. Her breathing became increasingly ragged as beads of cold sweat trickled down her face. She curled up and hugged herself with both hands. Her body ached, and the pain intensified, wrapping around her like a burning, sticky whip refusing to let her go in peace. It literally felt as though her whole body was breaking apart by an unknown force. The agony felt so familiar, yet she couldn't recall when she had felt it before.

"…tsuki… Natsuki…! Natsuki, wake up…!"

Natsuki snapped. Her blinking, wide eyes gazed up to see a bewildered Mai kneeling beside her. Only then she realized how hard she was gasping for air, her body shaky from the tension. What was it all about? Was it really just a dream? Where did the great pain, which seemed so real, came from? She instantly touched her arms, and was comforted that they were still fine. She even had to feel her hair, curious and scared if it had been soaked in water like she felt in her nightmare. To her relief, it was only sweaty.

"Are you all right? I heard you cry in your sleep," Mai said, sitting on her heels. A worried look on her face.

Natsuki wiped the beads of sweat off her forehead with the back of her hand. Heaving a tired sigh, she lied down on her back, inwardly thanking Mai for waking her up.

"You had a nightmare?"

"But… it felt so real."

Mai frowned. "What was it about?"

Natsuki glanced past Mai's shoulder and noted the soft, bluish gray light start to creep along the wooden rims of the closed windows. It seemed that she had wakened from one nightmare to another. She was still alive. She was still stuck in this foreign world, which she had grown to detest each day past.

"It… It felt like drowning. It felt so real." Natsuki rubbed her face with both hands. The echoes of waves crashing against the shores still rang distantly in her head.

Then, her eyes widened at a realization. The agony. The fear of height. The sound of crashing waves that troubled her every time she hears it. She recalled having fainted when her mother took her to the cliff when she was a child. That same fear she did not know where it came from, but it gripped her so harshly, clutching and tearing her insides. It felt most certain that she had drowned before, but she just couldn't remember when. It carried the same haunting feeling like the mysterious smell of lavender. Every little piece of the puzzle, though scattered, were coming closer now.

* * *

><p>Her gaze fixing upon the mirror, Shizuru carefully placed the black hat upon her head. She was in a navy-colored, square-patterned kariginu. Soft morning light flooded in through the opened shoji doors to the garden's side, lending comely, pinkish hues to the whole room. She loved early morning. She adored the fresh air around her, and the chilliness of meadows it brought. Yet, this hour was colder than any other she had experienced.<p>

Shizuru moved towards the doors facing the garden, and looked up at the sky above. While the darkness of the night quickly faded, she spotted the crescent moon hanging at the horizon. Approximately only one night out of a month, in which the moon would be full, leaving the night sky with its imperfect beauty for the rest of the month. There were times when she wondered if life was parallel to the moon cycle after all. One life would be complete and joyous, while the next incomplete and lonely. What longing and despair they must endure until they meet at full cycle again.

* * *

><p>As planned, Natsuki and The Protectors left Shou's house by dawn. They passed the outskirt of the city and trekked deep into the woods. Straw hats on, they were dressed as farmers, soiled and mudded. Nao in particular needed a lot of mud paint on her face for disguise. It amused Natsuki to see a princess going through all the troubles, wasting her energy and time, refusing the comfort of her palace, to trek this rough path in the hot sun for something she definitely didn't need. Just what faith could do to people? On the other hand, Natsuki secretly admired the redhead for her sheer will and strength.<p>

_Oiiii, it's so warm today! _Natsuki wiped the sweat from her face with the hem of her sleeve.

Shou was leading the way. Each of them carried several swords, bows and supplies, all of which were carefully wrapped under dark cloths. Natsuki herself was carrying at least three swords on her back, and she was in charge of carrying food supplies.

"When will we stop?" Natsuki asked.

"Soon, Natsuki-chan. It's almost lunchtime now. But, of course, we have to be there before dusk. We have to prepare our traps. Shou-san doesn't allow mistakes."

Before long, Shou turned around and gave them a nod. They were deep into the woods now. "Let's take a break. Haruka, survey the area," he ordered.

"Yes, Shou-san!" Haruka barked. While everyone settled down, unloading the weapons and supplies off their backs, she diligently marched down and around the hill. Amazingly, she seemed to be the only one unaffected by the long hike and hunger.

On her knees, Natsuki lifted the brim of her hat a bit, quietly observing everyone around her.

Mai quickly took out food supplies from Natsuki's packs, and arranged them for everyone. Shou nodded in a thankful manner when Mai offered him some rice balls.

Nao sank at her spot, panting slightly. Her wrapped weapons gave out clanking sounds as they unceremoniously hit the ground. She appeared paler than usual, exhausted from the heat. Her injury received weeks ago couldn't have helped either.

Natsuki couldn't help but stare at the princess as her thoughts turned and revolved around one of the princess' suitors. She only wished Shizuru success, knowing that it would be the girl's only ticket to freedom. During their separation, she had grown to miss the gentle smiles more than she had intended to. She found herself wonder so often if Shizuru was all right—if the girl had spared a thought on her disappearance at all.

Nao straightened up at once upon catching Natsuki's watchful eyes. Growling, she fisted up a ball of dirt and threw it at Natsuki. "Don't look at me!"

Natsuki instantly turned away, avoiding the dirt at her eyes. She irritably sighed, opting not to respond as her reason for staring wasn't really about the princess, but someone else entirely. She brushed her palms against each other and picked up a rice ball from the pack Mai had given her earlier. As soon as she tasted the first bite, she only realized then that she was literally starving.

When hunger had been appeased, Natsuki began to relax, and looked around once more. She watched the strange band of people, whose background, age difference, and personalities would have normally driven them apart. Yet, they were here, walking into their own trap, risking their own lives for their belief.

Mai seemed close to Shou, sitting next to him and chatting with him. For a few brief moments, Shou even smiled and laughed with the girl. There was almost a father and daughter vibe they gave off, and Natsuki couldn't help but be amazed by it. However, Nao still kept to herself, biting her food as though she hated to be here in the sun. Haruka hadn't come back yet, and the only other person Natsuki hadn't spoken to was the woman in black, sitting several feet away behind Nao.

Her dark hair was short and curly. Her skin was fair and her lips were red and thin. The woman appeared to be in mid-thirties. She was staring down at the ground for a long period of time, seemingly lost in her thoughts. It was only when she abruptly looked up and caught Natsuki's stare that Natsuki quickly looked away.

_I don't recognize her. _Natsuki wondered. It had become a habit of hers to try and recall if she had met any one of them before in her own world. To her surprise, the woman got up and moved to sit next to her.

"May I?" the woman asked. "What is your name? I wasn't very alert last night, so I must have let it slip my mind."

"Natsuki Kruger," Natsuki said, picking up another rice ball as if to shut herself up.

"_Natsuki Kruger_." The woman echoed, smiling. "Such a pretty name."

Natsuki looked up at the woman with wide eyes. Aside from Shizuru and the girl's mother, this woman was the only other stranger who could pronounce her name correctly. She squinted as she observed the woman. _Have we met before?_

"My name is Youko. I don't always steal and kill. I'm actually a healer."

Natsuki let the name raid her memories a bit, and a recollection dawned on her. Sagisawa Youko was Madam Fujino's doctor. Natsuki had caught a glimpse of the doctor at Fujino manor once on the day before Midori, the cemetery watcher, pushed her off the cliff. Although she had only seen the doctor's back and her trademark short, curly hair.

"Youko, is it?" Natsuki muttered. Meeting the doctor here shouldn't surprise her anymore since she had kept running into people she once knew in her own world. But they all held different meaning and importance to her now. All her thoughts then morphed into the only person, who had remained elusive to her memories, like the moon behind the clouds. Visible, yet vague.

_What are you to me, Shizuru? I want to know._

"Youko is also a fortuneteller, if you're desperate to know," Nao commented.

Youko chuckled. "They say that I have a heavenly gift. I heal people from sickness, and I can also tell them their future. But I think it's more of a curse than a gift. I myself don't really want to know."

"Do you lie to them then?" Natsuki asked. Her cheeks bobbling, she finished the rice ball and patted her hands over her knees. Her stomach was full now, and she felt reenergized.

There was a moment before Youko replied, "I never lied."

"Good. Can you tell me about my future?"

At Natsuki's question, the princess briefly glanced Natsuki's way.

Youko gently took Natsuki's hands and flipped them up. After reading Natsuki's palms for a while, she stared up at the younger woman's face. For a long moment, she remained silent. "It's strange. With you, I can't see much."

"Right." Natsuki just rolled her eyes. It was foolish of her to ask. She didn't even believe in this stuff, but she guessed that it was just her desperation tricking her logic.

"I sense separation and sadness," Youko said, closing her eyes.

Natsuki raised her brows mockingly. They all would know that she would be feeling quite desperate, having been taken captive for three weeks!

Youko's brows furrowed, and her eyes gradually opened. She stiffened a little as she watched the puzzled, green pools. "Your life will be in danger tonight, but… someone else will take your place…"

"What?" Natsuki didn't actually believe it, but hearing such news could trouble anyone. It didn't help that Youko didn't seem like a person who would fool anybody just for the heck of it.

"Stay away from me." Nao cursed under her breath, sharply looking away.

Natsuki growled at the princess. "You don't really believe in this stuff, right? It doesn't seem like a quality for a revolutionary person like you."

"Only because Youko has never been wrong," Shou interrupted. His voice was low and inert. His heavy gaze was on Natsuki.

Natsuki stared back at him defiantly, but she was slightly shaken inside. If Youko's gift had been so accurate, who would want to be near her now? Or should she keep distance from everyone until tomorrow? At the worst scenario, Shou might just decide to kill her now to get rid of the problem.

_Great. _Natsuki's gaze flickered between Shou and Nao.

As if on cue, Mai promptly got up from her spot and walked towards Natsuki. She sat down beside Natsuki, smiling as widely as she could. "Let us finish lunch soon, so that we could take turn with Haruka-chan!"

* * *

><p>Now that Haruka was back, Youko took the turn to watch the area. Natsuki found it relieving and amusing at the same time that Haruka paid no attention to Nao's telling of Youko's fortunetelling. The blonde just blinked, while gobbling the rice balls one after another. For Haruka, only about eight rice balls were able to satiate her hunger.<p>

"We all die. Sooner or later, it doesn't matter." That was all Haruka say.

The journey resumed after Haruka finished her meal. Shou led the way, while Mai opted to stay close to Natsuki. Both women were trailing a safe distance behind everyone else, keeping their voices low as they spoke to each other.

"What was that about? Tell me that they don't really believe Youko's fortunetelling." Natsuki grumbled. Her knuckles whitened from her hands gripping the ropes, which were holding together the heavy weapons over her back.

"Well, Youko has never been wrong," Mai said. Her expression was of concern, and even fear.

Natsuki rolled her eyes and elbowed Mai. "Try and convince me."

"Youko predicted deaths of our previous members. And she was always right." Mai shook her head at the thought.

"So there had been other members. Why don't you recruit more people? I don't really see what you can do with only five or six people here," Natsuki said.

"Things are a little complicated, but don't be afraid, Natsuki-chan. You'll probably understand more as things happen tonight."

Natsuki shrugged lightly, feeling the unwelcome weights on her shoulders. "Well, if Youko could see the future, why didn't they try to change the course of action to deter the prediction, like doing something to prevent it from happening?"

"It isn't like Youko could see everything. She sees bits and pieces of images or disrupted sequences. A lot of times she couldn't tell how something would happen, but she just saw the results. Do you know what I mean? Believe me. We did try to change it. We even twice canceled our expeditions just to see if it could change anything, but it didn't work."

"Your friend is officially spooky. This is disturbing, really." Natsuki's gaze was fixed on Youko, who was trekking several feet ahead of them. Normally, she would consider this sort of matter ridiculous and unworthy of her time and attention. But, seeing that she herself had been transported to another world was even a crazier notion, she would try to keep a more open mind now.

"It is amazing what Youko could sense or see."

Natsuki turned to Mai. "Then you should really stay away from me now, Mai. You're the last person in this gang I would want to take my place."

Mai just chortled. "Thank you, Natsuki-chan. But it can't be me. Youko said that I'll live to be an old woman!"

"Good for you." Natsuki shook her head, chuckling. "Well, I bet everyone must have had Youko read their future. What about the princess?"

"Nao?" Mai paused as she tried to recall Youko's verdict. "It was so long ago, and Nao only had Youko read her just once."

Natsuki raised her brows at the notion. The princess seemed to really believe in Youko's gift, but only one reading from Youko must have been less than good news to the redhead.

"_Struggles will be her life_. Yes, I think that was what Youko said. That's all I know though. Nao doesn't like to talk about it, and Youko always refuses to mention it again," Mai explained further.

"I don't see how a princess must struggle. Everything that is happening now is only because she is inflicting it upon herself."

"Oh, life in the palace isn't as easy as you might think. There are good and bad people everywhere. Poor Nao learned it very early in life."

Natsuki glanced at the redhead, who was moving next to Youko. "Do tell."

"Her mother was the emperor's third wife, his most favorite, but she was murdered when Nao was only eight years old. It was rumored that she was plotted against by the empress herself. That's why Nao is with us today. She wants revenge."

At the revelation, Natsuki kept her gaze on the princess' back. For a moment, she felt a hollow in her chest. She must admit that she could sympathize with the princess for having lost a parent so early in life. However, Natsuki's own mother died in an accident, which would leave a vastly different impression than to know her dead by murder.

Natsuki subtly sighed. Perhaps, she could understand where Nao had come from, and how the girl was acting as though the whole world was against her. Always that misplaced anger and hate. Always the insecurity flashing in the girl's eyes even when she was trying to defy everyone. After all, it was hard just to get a chance to be loved, but harder to lose the one you love.

* * *

><p>The sun had finally slipped below the horizontal line, and the sky had begun to darken. For long hours, Natsuki had helped setting up traps along the narrow path between the hills. Deep in the forest, the sound of wind was deafening. The air was growing colder and harsher. They had changed into black clothes, and their faces were half veiled behind the black masks. They were already tired from the long trek, but none of them dared to show exhaustion. Their eyes were vigilant. Their bodies stiffened in caution. They were a group of six people about to fight a band of forty men. It was the craziest thing Natsuki had ever heard, and she could only wish for her normal college days.<p>

The team had split up. Hiding behind the trees, Natsuki and Mai were stationed on top of the hill. Natsuki had a bow in her left hand, an arrow in her right. Thankfully, she had enjoyed and exceled in archery practices back in high school, or else Shou might just render her useless and kill her then. Mai, on the other hand, was at the ready with the hand drill. Natsuki wasn't entirely sure of her scouting skills anymore since her camping days had been far and few in between the past several years, so she let Mai take care of it. Archery seemed to suit her more. Still, Natsuki grimaced. With her brilliant shooting skills, there would be serious damages or casualties. Archery was supposed to be only a sport to her, not to shoot people down for real.

_I should just aim elsewhere. No one would be watching, right? _Natsuki inwardly grumbled, and glanced up.

Nao and Youko were occupying the top of the opposite hill, while Shou and Haruka stationed further down the path below. The latter pair would come in close contact with the caravan, taking the highest risk. But Natsuki wasn't going to protest. She liked being up here, far away from the trouble that would ensue below. She had tried to memorize the long track in the woods just in case she had to run for her life.

Then Natsuki gazed down at Mai, who was kneeling in front of her. The opportunity presented itself to her now. She could strike Mai and try to escape. However, she briefly shut her eyes, suppressing her sigh. "Will you let me go?"

Mai didn't even turn to look at her. Natsuki wasn't sure if it was because Mai trusted her, or Mai simply trusted in her own skills to fend off any attack.

"But you can't," Mai eventually said.

Natsuki felt the knot in her chest. "There'll be chaos, and nobody will be watching. Come on, Mai. You know that I don't belong here. I understand what you all are trying to achieve. It's a noble cause, but it's not my fight."

Mai remained absolutely still, her gaze fixed on the road below. "What will you fight for, Natsuki-chan?"

"Why would you fight for people you don't even know? They might not even care for what you have risked your life for."

"True." Mai lightly chuckled. "But take this as a test for us. One day we'll find what's most important to us, and we'll fight for it as we do now."

"This is serious, Mai. I don't know how many times you guys have done this before, but the risk is real. We could die tonight." For a second, Natsuki even hoped for them to escape together. As the sky continued to darken, her heart weighed heavier and heavier each minute past.

"If you run away now, Shou-san would be really furious, and he wouldn't just let it slip. Nao would hunt you down. And, she could certainly reach you anywhere. Remember that she's a princess. Fujino-sama won't be able to protect you from her… They might even agree to marry in near future, Natsuki. Are you sure that you want to rely on him?"

Natsuki involuntarily clutched the bow. "I don't expect that he could protect me. I just don't want to do things that I don't want to. Making me kill your enemies isn't going to make me one of you."

Mai turned to look over her shoulder, a small chuckle escaping her throat. "Have a little faith, Natsuki-chan. If you really came back through time as you claimed, then you might have already done it a thousand years ago. You would know what to do now, wouldn't you?"

* * *

><p>Standing in front of the shrine, Shizuru looked into the darkness around her. The shadows cast by the thick trees. The rustling of the leaves on the ground, swirled by the chilly, night wind. She let her surroundings enveloped her, comforted her and took her away from the reality she despised. She was early to the appointment as it would be quite a while before the show at the Amaterasu Theater would be over, but she just wanted to have this quiet moment to herself before Keiko would arrive.<p>

The memories they had shared here brought out her smile. Shizuru recalled her younger, awkward self being ushered around by the singer, enchanted by the older woman's genuine laughter. In their private times, Keiko would show the kind of smile Shizuru swore that it was reserved only for 'Fujino Eiji'. And, after a while, she began to even entertain the idea that the smiles were actually for her. Then Keiko had shed off the carefree smile from their early years and transformed it into something else, something that looked almost like a heartbreaking joy. A longing. A desire. It had Shizuru wonder endlessly. What did 'Fujino Shizuru' do to deserve such a painful smile?

Glancing up, Shizuru studied the crescent moon in the dark sky. She sighed at the nostalgic, haunting feeling the view brought. The same, old question crept into her mind, but she had no answer to it.

"Eiji… Eiji…" The panted whisper came.

Shizuru turned around and saw Keiko approaching. The woman had come alone, but Shizuru was sure that the singer had her carriage waiting some distance away, preserving their privacy as usual. Under the moonlight, Keiko's garments gave a sharp contrast against her pale skin. Her long, black hair was rather disheveled from the wind and her run. She appeared to be out of breath as her red lips were slightly gaping. Her eyes were wide as she stared at Shizuru, both hands clutching the fabric of her clothes, holding them up at her chest. Gulping, she brushed the strands of her hair from her face with one shaky hand.

"You're early. I thought that the show is still—" Shizuru didn't get to finish her words as Keiko rushed to her. The singer clung to her taller frame with both arms around her neck.

"You're here. You've come for me." Tears shot to Keiko's eyes, and Shizuru halted in confusion. "I thought that you'd ignore my request. I know it was rather brash and abrupt, but I needed to see you… Oh, I miss you so much."

Shizuru broke their embrace a little and, for a moment, stared down at the singer's beautiful face. All her confusions and longings erupted within her, warring with one another. "I miss our old time, too." The words escaped her lips before she could stop herself, and she wasn't sure if it was for the best. But wasn't it what she had come for? She had come to face the truth.

Keiko cupped Shizuru's face with both hands, feverishly stroking her cheeks. There was a silence between them as uncertainties swam in her eyes. Her gaze lowered to Shizuru's lips, lingering there for another moment. "You are… so soft," she muttered.

For the past five years, this was perhaps the closest proximity Shizuru had allowed between them. They had shared embraces now and then, but Shizuru had always broken away soon after. But she let it linger on a little longer tonight. She gently grasped Keiko's hand and held it at her warmed cheek. "I miss our old days. I always think of when we often met here at night. I miss you laugh—your smile. How you'd tell me stories about your performances, your wild and colorful friends… Funny, I can barely remember my own stories now."

_Because it was all a lie._

A smile came upon Keiko's face. Keiko shook her head, teardrops falling from her face. "I remember all of your stories. All of them. I repeat them in my dreams like the dance moves memorized for the stage. But you're not for the play. You're real to me, Eiji."

For a moment, Shizuru had been rushed back to the memories of their moments spent together, but the name Keiko had just uttered rudely snapped Shizuru back to reality. A dream would remain only a dream as a lie would never breed a truth. For what it was worth, tonight would be the answer to their pain and frustration.

"There's nothing real between us." Shizuru's voice came out coldly like a melody unsung. She listened to herself as if she was listening to a stranger talking. "It's not what you think, Keiko. What you remember of me. What you see of me. I—" However, her breath momentarily left her, and she suddenly staggered at her last word.

Keiko pressed in closer to Shizuru, her body trembling. Their faces nearly brushed each other's, and she breathed at Shizuru's lips. "Tell me what it is then. Show me the truth."

Against the cold wind, Shizuru could feel the warmth radiating from the woman. Such heated longing. A feverish passion in those eyes was as clear as the stars above. But, among the brilliances in the night sky, there was the same crescent moon she saw earlier this morning. Still incomplete—unfulfilled.

"I…" Shizuru began. _I am not Eiji. _But her voice simply failed her. It wasn't how it was supposed to be. She just couldn't betray her father's trust. How could she risk the status of her family for her own selfish need to be free? She couldn't ruin everything now when they all had risked so much already. At her most optimistic view, her father would let Eiji come back at an appropriated time.

As silence continued to suffocate them, Keiko's shoulders fell. Her eyes narrowed as the hope in her gaze slowly turned into sadness. "I miss you so much that I don't really see the reason I should wake up again if not to wake next to you. Night after night, you're the one who've given me joyous dreams. But… it really was just a dream."

Her courage was perhaps lost along the way from her mansion to the shrine. The truth was as far away as the moon in the dark sky, where she could never reach. Shizuru closed her eyes to shut the pain in Keiko's gaze from her sight, her arms falling to her sides. "One day, Keiko. If you could only wait, I promise that—"

"I am with child, and it is your father's."

Several moments had passed before crimson eyes opened again to a strange new world—a callous world she was thrown in. Shizuru tried to register the words in her mind. She gazed into the dark eyes before her, searching for a sign of truth or lie. "What?" she numbly whispered.

Keiko took a few steps away from Shizuru, hands over her tummy. "I—I wanted to see you. I wanted to know how you truly feel about me. But… but it doesn't seem like nothing could be done now. Still, I am glad that you've come. I thank you, and I will always remember your kindness."

_Father… _Shizuru stared blankly at Keiko. _What's going on? How…?_

Shizuru could only imagine what had gone on between her father and Keiko after all these years. She questioned back to those nights Keiko spend doing after Shizuru left the singer's home, thinking the woman must have been dreaming of 'Fujino Eiji'. All the smiles Shizuru had thought that they were meant for her brother. All the years she had wasted trying to be someone else. All the years her brother had been locked up in the mansion, pained and forgotten. Her guilt and pleasure fused into one, only to be crushed by frustration and heartbreak—destroyed by an attempt at the truth. Before Shizuru could stop herself, she snatched Keiko's arm, gripping it so hard and earning a muffled cry of pain from the woman. Their feet ruffled in fright and fury. Their breaths hitched as their hearts ached, beating to the bottom of darkness. They struggled in the empty space in front of the shrine, the place of their foolish dream.

"How could you do this!? How, when you knew—"

"You didn't want me! You've never touched me again since that night five years ago!" Keiko broke into a sob, but her eyes were filled with hurt and anger. "Masaru-sama has been kind to me. He showers me with love, attention and gifts. He says that he needs me. But you don't. You… You just don't love me."

Shizuru stopped to catch her breath. At the singer's outburst, Shizuru eventually let go of the woman. Her heart sank as she lowered her arms to her sides, her gaze at the ground. It took her a long moment before she could collect herself again. It was foolish to even hope for a resolution between them as there was nothing real between them from the start. There wasn't anything she could say to Keiko, or to herself, to make anything better now. Her head started to spin, and Shizuru pinched the bridge of her nose, squeezing her eyes shut. "You asked me… to come here tonight just to deliver me this news? I really didn't have to know as it doesn't concern me—"

"It_ doesn't _concern you," Keiko murmured. A bitter smile then crept up her face as she nodded to herself. "I should have known that, but I guess it was my silly hope that has blinded me. Well, thank you for the truth, Eiji. It is better than nothing at all."

At the response, Shizuru glowered up at the woman. "You should have known that it's impossible between us. I will marry an aristocrat, not a singer like you. And, my father doesn't love you, Keiko. You can only be his companion on his lonely nights, and that's all you'll ever be to him." Despite Shizuru's words, Keiko just smiled at her in return. And, it hurt Shizuru even more as it was the most sincere smile she had seen from Keiko in a long time.

"I don't mind being just a companion to him, but… but I had hoped to be something more to you." Keiko lightly chuckled, wiping the tears from her eyes with her slender finger. "If a dream is all it's ever going to be between us, then please tell me all your dreams. Even if they'd never come true, I would still love to hear them."

Shizuru made no move to reach the singer as the dreams she had were nothing of light and joy. It was definite now. The answer was clear. She simply couldn't replace her brother. She didn't want to substitute this role anymore. She never wanted to be him. She looked up at the woman in front of her, audacity slowly rising in her heart. "I am not Ei—" But she suddenly turned at the sound of rustling through the grass field.

Keiko frowned as she looked over Shizuru's shoulder. "What is going on…? W—who are they?"

Stepping out from behind the bushes, three, black-clad men emerged from the darkness. Their faces were half hidden behind the black veils, revealing only their intense eyes. Swords ready in their hands, they took careful steps towards Shizuru and Keiko.

Shizuru instantly put herself in front of Keiko, drawing her katana out. In the dark, she squinted and saw the freshly slick, bloodied trails on their blades. Her thoughts were not the most positive now. She didn't particularly want to imagine what had happened to Kiyoshi and his two other guards. She turned slightly to Keiko and whispered, "Go. Now."

Horror struck Keiko's face. She looked between Shizuru and the intruders. "N—no, I won't leave—"

Shizuru pushed Keiko away. "Now!"

Noting the seriousness in Shizuru's voice, Keiko was wide-eyed, hugging herself with both hands. She then took a few, shaken steps away before turning and running away.

Only when the singer's back disappeared from her sight, Shizuru turned to the men in front of her. Her hands gripped her sword so hard that her knuckles whitened. Her heart pounded against her chest as she watched their movements. Some were slightly limping, suggesting fresh wounds, which they might have received from fighting her guards earlier. Only professional assassins could handle her guards like this, but Shizuru had not the time to ponder who sent them. Out of his popularity and public attention on him, 'Fujino Eiji' did earn many enemies. Although there had been attempts on Eiji's life before, the incident tonight would be considered the most blatant of all. Someone wanted 'Eiji' dead and fast.

"Fujino… Fujino Eiji?" The man in the middle called out. His voice was low. His tone was cold.

It wasn't her name. It never was. But Shizuru wasn't sure how to walk away from it now. Perhaps, she could only accept what was destined for her.

* * *

><p>Quite a few hours had passed in silence, and Natsuki nearly fell asleep in her post. She only snapped out of her doze when the sound of men roaring and horses neighing thundered through the forest.<p>

Holding their sword up high, a dozen horsemen galloped along the narrow path below. It looked almost as if they were running away from something. Several heavy, large carriages followed, trying their best to catch up. The caravan in question arrived hours later than The Protectors had anticipated. What startled Natsuki even more was that they appeared to be in disarray, frightened and even angry.

The strange occurrence must have disturbed Mai, too. The fiery-haired girl sharply turned to Natsuki. "Now!"

One eye closed, Natsuki pulled the bow string. Her focus slowly shifted, moving slightly ahead of the horsemen. Then she sent down the first incendiary arrow. It flew through the cold air and hit the dark path, igniting the trail of flame below. As swift as a strike of lightning, the blaze ran along the fueled track Shou and Haruka had set up. The thick walls of fire burst into life, blocking the caravan from passing the valley. The horsemen had to swiftly pull back to avoid being engulfed in the fire, the halt was so abrupt that a few of them tumbled off their horses. Yells and cries erupted as the men gestured at one another in the chaos.

"Well done, Natsuki-chan!" Mai cut the strings in front of her with a swing of her blade. The rocks were then catapulted, rolling down the hill and crashing upon at the officials below. While some of the men had fallen, crushed by the rocks, many of them galloped back down the path where they had come from.

Shou and Haruka promptly leapt into the commotion, warring with the men with ferocious courage, driven by a foreign, bold force unknown to most people. Plowing through dozens of men, the duo relied heavily on the aids of their companions stationed above.

_Holy shit! Those two are absolutely nuts! _Natsuki watched the duo with wide eyes.

While Natsuki tried to keep her aim on the horses and carriages, she was constantly distracted by the show Shou and Haruka were putting on. It was suicidal to say the least. Before Natsuki could stop herself, her body acted purely upon pure instinct. Her bow turned. Her aim was quickly focused at the closest man to Shou's back. Before her mind could process any thoughts further, she sent the arrow away. The sharpened, wooden rod scorched through the air and struck through the official's neck. His arched arm dropped, the sword falling off his grasp. His blood shot out like a nasty, broken fountain.

Shou spun around, bewildered to see the official fallen in front of him. However, he gave no heed to the blood showering upon his face.

_He… He's dead…_

Natsuki suddenly found it hard to breathe as chill ran down her spine. Her arms stiffened. Her ears blocked as she could only vaguely make out Mai's compliment on her shot. She froze as she stared down at the lifeless body of a stranger below. What had she done? To Natsuki's surprise, Shou stared up right at her. She couldn't tell how he could spot her so quickly and precisely up on the dark hill. Under his sharp gaze, she realized then that he had been watching her all along.

* * *

><p>With both hands on her katana, Shizuru lifted the sword up to block the blow. Out of breath, she grumbled at the powerful strike. Facing with the two assailants' relentless attacks, she found herself being driven backwards with only a few chances to strike back. Trying to parry their blades had successfully worn her out. These assassins were good. It only confirmed her of Eiji's not-so-friendly associates in the palace, but all problems always lied beyond the closed doors.<p>

At the full swing directing at her torso, Shizuru slashed her sword against the closest attacker's blade. However, at the moment their blades clashed, he swiftly turned his body in and rammed into hers, knocking her off balance. She stumbled a few steps backward, her back bumping against the tree. At the impact, pain hammered at the slash wound on her left shoulder. She slouched gracelessly as she clutched her wound, panting heavily.

The assassin quickly lifted his katana, his gaze raging upon her. Gritting her teeth, Shizuru spun from her spot, narrowly escaping the full swing, in which the blade sliced into the tree's trunk. Her feet shuffled backward, giving her some room from him. She ignored the pain on her wound and gripped her katana tighter. With all her might, she slashed deep across his back.

"Ahhhhhhh!" Screaming, he fell against the tree, and bounced off to land on all fours.

Without hesitation, Shizuru lifted her sword up and thrust the blade down his back. The sharp end exited through his chest, driving his body flat on the ground. Her face was bloodied. Her hat was long dropped to the ground somewhere, and strands of her hair were loosened from the tie, swaying with the strong, chilly wind. Her arms lowered, she watched in horror as his body began to still, his blood pooling and spreading out on the ground. Her lungs tightened. Her face paled. She swayed in her post as she tried to shut out the sight before her. It had been two years since she had killed someone. The vicious wave of memories crashed back at her, almost toppling her off her feet.

At a sharp gush of wind, Shizuru weakly turned. To her luck, she ducked just in time when the second assassin swerved his sword at her. If she had been a second slower, she would have been decapitated by his fierce precision. On one knee, she pulled her sword from the dead man's body and stabbed it down at the second attacker's foot.

Hollering in pain, he glowered down at her, beads of sweat running down his face. "DIE!" He roared, and lifted his sword again, his thick arm slightly trembled.

Shizuru instantaneously pulled her sword out from his foot and rolled away from the downward strike. Getting up to her feet again, she swung her sword horizontally to block another clash from him. However, she was no match to his strength. She stumbled and fell flat on her back. Although Midori had trained her in the past, being an aristocrat, who spent most of her time in palaces and mansions, exchanging poems and discussing weather, Shizuru found herself lacking to face two attackers at the same time. Not to mention that her father had preferred her to stay out of activities that would require physical strength, fearing for her wellbeing.

The assailant began to shudder after losing so much blood. Wheezing, his face paled in a matter of seconds, but he wouldn't budge. He struck the sword down at Shizuru again and again.

Lying on her back, Shizuru could only block so many of his strikes. She rolled away from the spot, but his blade eventually managed to slash at her right ribcage. She cried out in pain, and the strength of her grip on her sword considerably weakened. Soon, her body slacked, her guards down. Flopping down on the ground, she lied flat on her stomach. Her eyes were fluttering close as her head began to spin, trying to shut out the agony from her mind.

After a few moments in heavy silence, Shizuru slowly opened her eyes again, surprised that she was still alive. The assassin should have finished her off during the time she was rendered defenseless. However, she looked up and saw Kiyoshi standing above her. Her loyal guard was facing the assassin with his sword blocking the vicious blade coming down at her throat.

_Kiyo… Kiyoshi… _Shizuru thought weakly, although she couldn't express how glad she was that he was still alive.

Kiyoshi appeared ragged; his forehead was bleeding, and his wounded right thigh was soaked in blood. But his gaze remained determined, even more so now that he had seen his master wounded.

Shizuru blinked a few times as she wondered what happened to the other two guards, who were with Kiyoshi. Possibly, not a very optimistic thought.

Kiyoshi and the assassin moved again, their swords clashing. At such violent, continual strikes, coupled with the effect from their wounds, Kiyoshi's sword slipped unceremoniously off his grasp. Kiyoshi staggered back at the impact, breathless.

Realizing the advantage he had gained, the assassin turned away from Kiyoshi. He gripped his sword tighter, sharply raised it, and struck down at Shizuru. "Aaaaah!"

Grunting, Shizuru reached out for her sword on the ground. She swung it up and parried the hit. He continued to strike, blood in his eyes. Then his blade successfully pressed down against hers, cutting into the wound of her left shoulder. Shutting her eyes tightly, she screamed at the repeated assault on the injury, blood continuing to pour out. Her heart was caught in her throat, her body wretched at the agony. However, she gathered her last strength and slid her sword out of the tangle. Gritting her teeth, she blindly swung the blade up at the man above her. Only when his scream rumbled, she opened her eyes again. His armed hand was flying off into the air; it was still holding the katana in its cold grasp. She watched as his chopped arm landed next to her.

His body failed him, and the assassin fell to his knees, screaming at the top of his lungs.

Shizuru wasted not another second. She slashed her sword up, the blade cutting across his throat. His blood shot out like a fountain before his body lifelessly fell upon her. Shizuru grunted as she tried to push him off her. The hefty, dead weight of his body only reminded her how lucky she was to survive a clash against him and his partner. When she successfully pushed him away, she shakily sat up, wheezing for air.

"Shi… Shizuru…! Are you all right!?" Kiyoshi crawled towards her, worried over the bleeding on her wounds.

Shizuru felt as though she couldn't get enough air in her lungs no matter how hard she breathed. "It's… nothing serious…" Her gaze madly scanned the dark forest around her, expecting another attack. A dark thought suddenly hit her. There were three of them. Where did the third assassin go?

_Keiko…_

Shizuru ignored all the pain, which her body was screaming for rest. She gripped her sword and pushed herself off the ground. Her foggy breaths clouded the air as she plowed ahead, hoping to find any trace of where Keiko might have gone. A scream. A cry. A smell. Anything. She cursed at herself for neglecting the danger posed upon Keiko. If something were to happen, she only had herself to blame.

"Keiko…! Keiko…! Where are you!?" Shizuru's numbed feet kept running, her heart beating at a thunderous pace.

Panting, Kiyoshi was trailing behind her, albeit much slower than he would have liked. "Shizuru…? Shizu…"

Then both Shizuru and Kiyoshi stopped in their tracks. Amongst the thick, endless rows of tree ahead, the man in black hovered above the lady in red. His one hand grasped at her neck. His other hand held the sword up high. For a moment, it appeared like a painting of one disturbing nightmare. Faster than a blink of an eye, the man plunged his blade down through the woman's chest.

Keiko struggled violently, but soon lost her strength. Her body flopped down at his feet as he sharply retracted his sword from her body.

Crimson eyes were wide. Shizuru froze in her post, watching the scene unfolding in front of her as if hypnotized. In the dark, she could still catch the glimpse of crimson trails running down to the tip of his blade. All of a sudden, she felt so lightheaded. Her vision became blurry, and she felt violently nauseous. She staggered as she gasped for breath. Her fists slowly clenched along her sides, shaken. Her muscles along her arms tightened so badly that the pain on her shoulder multiplied tenfold. Ironically, the physical pain was the only thing that still kept her mind on alert. She could feel her warm blood trickle down her left shoulder and arm, forming dribbles of liquid at her knuckle.

"Keiko!"

The third assassin snapped at her roar. Seeing both Shizuru and Kiyoshi, but without any sign of his comrades, he immediately took off into the dark.

"Leave this to me!" Kiyoshi warned Shizuru. Grunting, he raised his sword and rushed after the assailant, though his movements were slowed down by the wound on his thigh.

It felt like forever to Shizuru as she took the heavy steps towards Keiko's still body. She gazed down at the woman at her feet. To her strange relief, Keiko looked peaceful with her eyes closed as though she was just asleep, lured in the most beautiful dream of all—their delusional dream.

The sword slid off Shizuru's grasp, lying idly on the grass. Shizuru sank to her knees and pulled Keiko up into a gentle embrace. Then Keiko opened her eyes, her gaze weak and grieved. Shizuru felt the air in her lungs solidify painfully as Keiko's tears streamed down her own beautiful face. She could speak of all the unfairness in the world, but there would be no end to it. Here they were, defiant but small against fate. Perhaps, life was akin to a theatrical play. The story had been written, and there was nothing they could do to change anything. And, when the curtains called, they would leave the stage, only to come back another day and start it all over again. Love. Hate. Life. Death. The vicious cycle went on and on. She could hear the drums rolling, roaring into the midst of nothingness, only there was no telling if it was the drum to a beginning or an end.

At the thoughts dragging heavily in her mind, Shizuru tightened her embrace. Oddly, she didn't really feel the pain on her shoulder now as though it wasn't even her own body, but Fujino Eiji's. "It's going to be all right. I'm here with you now," she whispered into the woman's ear as the weak body began to retch and twist in her arms. She looked away into the dark, unsure of what was should be said—uncertain of what was left between them, if there was any from the start. "I… I'm so sorry, Keiko. It shouldn't have come to this… It shouldn't." Her arms started to tremble. Although her rage was beyond emotions imaginable, she forced herself to remain calm for Keiko. It was all she could do at the moment.

"Don't be…" Keiko breathed. "I am… forever yours…, Eiji. I—" She stopped as a series of violent cough interrupted her. Her body bent in agony, wheezing.

Shizuru tightened Keiko in her arms, allowing Keiko to tiredly throw her head back at her shoulder. "_Eiji_," Shizuru absentmindedly echoed. Swallowing the familiar emptiness she had felt all through her life, she forced out a smile for Keiko. "Eiji loves you, Keiko. He would want to marry you."

Keiko was resting her head against Shizuru's shoulder, her blood oozing out and soaking their garments. Mercifully, her heavy breathing slowed a bit. She gazed up at the starry sky and remained silent for a moment. "He would want… to marry me…?"

Shizuru shifted in her position a little and gazed down at the woman in her arms. For the first time in years, she felt the weight of a mountain lifted from her chest. Why did it feel so easy now? Why hadn't she done it earlier, foolishly wasting all the years of their lives? It was too late now, wasn't it?

Their gazes fixed upon each other. There was no more confusion, hurt or desperation. When Shizuru was certain that she had Keiko's attention, she said, "I am not Fujino Eiji. For the past five years, I've been masquerading as him. I lied to you, Keiko. I'm not real."

At the blatant confession, Keiko stared up at Shizuru for a long moment as though to register what those words meant—as if to process what exactly had happened between them during the past five years. "Where… Where is he?" Her murmur came weaker each moment passed, and Shizuru clutched the woman's hand, keeping Keiko's tired focus on her.

Shizuru's eyes narrowed as she contemplated at the information. "He's been locked up on Fuuka Island for five years now. It… It's Lord Masaru's order."

Another silence fell upon them. Shizuru couldn't tell what was going through Keiko's mind as the woman's shattered gaze, which was fixed upon her face, seemingly pierced through her. Ironically, the woman's blank gaze summed up her life story; she felt as empty as she had ever been. No one really knew her, saw her, or wanted her for who she was. The simple, brutal truth scorched in, imprinting a deep scar in her heart. Then, Shizuru was pulled out of her thoughts at the weak pull on her arm. She looked down to see a faint, peaceful smile. Keiko was watching her, scrutinizing her with such subtle, but fierce attention.

"And… you are…?"

At the simple question, Shizuru suddenly found herself at a loss for words. It took her a moment to find her voice again. "Fujino... Fujino Shizuru. I am Eiji's sister."

Keiko let out a soft 'ah'. She continued to study Shizuru until her eyelids began to flutter closed. Keiko's chuckle came pained and frail, her smile still noticeable. If there was a reason Keiko should find their entire situation so amusing, Shizuru wouldn't know. "Maybe… another life," she breathed, "I'd get… to know you… the real you." Her hand on Shizuru's arm slowly slid down, and rested upon her own stomach. "It's... been a pleasure… to meet you, Shi… Shizuru…"

Feeling the dead weight in her arms, Shizuru found it increasingly difficult to hold Keiko. Her arms were stiff and deadened. Her body ached, screaming for rest. The pain on her shoulder in particular was pounding and tearing at her, pushing her to the limit. Perhaps, she should let go. Perhaps, it was what they all should do. Gradually, Shizuru looked away from the beautiful face below hers. Her gaze drifted, ascending to meet with the crescent moon above. Perhaps, in another life.

* * *

><p>Natsuki had taken a sharp step back, her hand forcefully pulling the arrow out of the man's eye. Spray of his blood spattered at her chest and the large part of the left side of her face. His knelt body inelegantly fell to the ground. "Ah!" she grumbled in disgust, but quickly focused on the task at hand again.<p>

As instructed, Natsuki had kept her proximity to Mai at all times. But she had rapidly found herself following her companion down the hill to join the rest of the gang in this bloody ordeal. At close range, her shooting skill was rendered vulnerable. She was forced to rely on her little, hand-to-hand combat skills, helped and protected by Mai at several moments. Ironically, being caught in the midst of madness, facing dozens of men in a dead match, she had never felt livelier.

At the sight of a man thrusting the unaware Mai to the ground, Natsuki instinctively pulled out a sword stuck in a dead body nearest to her and leapt at him, slashed the blade with all her might. He howled in agony at the deep cut on his shoulder. His sword, which was pointing down at Mai's throat, slipped off his hold.

Mai took the opportunity to get up fast, and gashed his throat with her sword. His blood shot out, soaking Mai's face. Only after the man falling flat on the ground, Mai glanced at Natsuki. "Thanks, Natsuki-chan!"

However, Natsuki stood stock-still, staring down at the third life she had taken tonight. Although what she did was necessary to help her friend, she found nothing remotely pleasant about it. She just couldn't tell why Mai was smiling. It wasn't like a spirited response one would make to their teammate in a game of sport.

_What… What am I doing? _

It wasn't a fight for 'life' like Natsuki had envisioned it should be. How would her father react now if he saw her in this state? All of a sudden, her limbs became heavy, and she couldn't even move to avoid the blade that was directing at her. She blinked a few times as she absentmindedly took in the sight of Mai's panicky face. At least, the look on her friend's face now was more suitable than a smile.

Mai sped towards the attacker and intercepted his blow. She pushed him away with the fierce swing of her sword, promptly putting herself between Natsuki and the official. She then dashed at him, ducked once to avoid his assault, and thrust her sword through his chest with ease. She then turned to snarl at Natsuki. "What were you doing!? Don't just stand there! Fight back!"

Natsuki was snapped back to reality at the irritated yank on her arm. "Huh?" She stood, dazed. It was the first time she had seen Mai so serious. Frowning, she walked up to her friend, who was twirling and dancing in her deadly raid against the enemies. "Fight for what exactly? We didn't have to be here, Mai."

Mai angrily fended the officials away with the sharp swings of her sword. She momentarily turned to Natsuki, her gaze ablaze. "For justice, Natsuki! That's what we fight for!"

But Natsuki didn't have the second to respond. She instantly pulled out another arrow from the quiver and sent it pass Mai's shoulder. The sharp end tore through the air and struck into the approaching man's forehead, stopping him before he could strike Mai.

Mai sharply glanced over her shoulder. She was bewildered to realize that she had been taken away by her own anger, neglecting her own safety. She turned to face the raven-haired woman, a look of gratitude in her eyes. "Na… tsuki…"

"There's no justice, Mai. Not in your world, or mine. This world, or the next," Natsuki said. She couldn't quite recognize her own voice. Disbelief was visible in the green eyes. She felt the unbearable weight of her own words in her heart. Until now, she had never bothered to look back and study herself. She was unsure where or when exactly she had lost faith in life. She clutched her chest. She couldn't tell where the sudden desperation came from.

"Watch out!" Mai pulled Natsuki away from her spot. She turned her sword up, parrying the blow from another combatant. "What… has sent you here…, if not fate…!?" She plowed ahead, confident against the enemies. "You must believe… again!" After she brought down several men with her aggressive precision, she turned to Natsuki, winded. "We're here… because it is fated."

Clutching the bow in her hand, Natsuki inertly looked around her. Dead bodies were piling up. The smell of blood fumed into the air. Then, the last remaining official was put to silence by the harsh swing of Haruka's mace. There was no one left to fight as the fire trails they had ignited began to die down. This fiery night turned out to be colder than she had expected. Natsuki then recalled the few lives she had taken tonight. Maybe she had killed them before, and they had died again and again at her hand. What was the meaning of this? Did she come back just to reopen the wound? The only positive thing she could think out of this entire situation was that none of The Protectors had died in her place as Youko had predicted.

Before her mind would delve further into the well of frustrations and fears, Shou's yell from the distance crept into Natsuki's awareness. She looked up, noting his gestured hand, which pointed down the road. The sounds of horses neighing and galloping grew louder and louder each second past. A group of thirty, black-clad individuals on horses eventually emerged at the other end of the serpentine path, heading towards them. They were not officials as far as Natsuki could tell.

Mai quickly urged Natsuki to stay behind her. Haruka, Nao and Youko took a few steps back, their weapons ready.

The woman on the black horse then trotted to a stop in front of Shou. Like all of her men, the lower half of her face was concealed behind the black veil. She briefly glanced at her peers, who promptly surrounded the carriages, and then wielded her axe around. "This is it! We were the first to attack them! The goods belong to us!"

Haruka gripped the mace in her hands. "Cheaters! The goods should be ours since we were the ones who actually fought them! You've just arrived after the fight was over! There's no way we'll let you have it!"

The woman pointed her axe down at Haruka. "Try it, fool."

Haruka took a step forward, but Shou raised his arm in front of her, stopping her. "B—but, master!" Haruka protested.

Natsuki opted to watch from the distance. It appeared very likely that these two groups of outlaws had encountered each other before. However, The Protectors was a smaller group, ill-equipped, than the horse riders. Judging from Shou's composed demeanor, it was as though he had been expecting the riders to show up somehow.

"We were fighting the men who stationed behind. And, the men you fought were already ruffled and wounded by our earlier attacks. Only six of you wouldn't be able to take care of them all," the black-clad woman said, chuckling to herself.

Shou looked up the woman. "The night is colder than we think. We shouldn't stay out here for too long as their reinforcements might come anytime soon. Let us split now and go our own way."

The woman nodded in agreement. "You can have two carriages."

"Blasphemy!" It was Nao, who yelled in rebuttal.

"There are twelve carriages in total. We want four of them," Shou said.

The mysterious woman swung her axe lazily. "I was being very generous, The Protectors. You take two or none at all."

Natsuki frowned the more she hears the woman talk; the voice sounded very familiar.

"We risked our lives against dozens of officials here. Four carriages aren't even fair. We should get half of the carriages at least," Youko voiced out.

The woman rider sharply turned to glower down at Youko. "You're pushing your luck. I decide now that I will take all the carriages. Pick up any item you want. Take all you can, but leave by foot. That's all I'm going to let you take!"

Tension filled the air, and they all had their hand on their weapon.

"Fine. We'll take two carriages," Shou finally said.

"Master!" Haruka burst out, but Nao pulled her back by the arm. After a moment of struggle, Haruka just let out of a frustrated sigh, and stalked away.

Natsuki inwardly grumbled, sympathizing how Haruka felt. If only she knew that their prize would be taken away so easily after the bloody fight, she would have burnt the carriages with her incendiary arrows before than to lose them now.

Mai lightly elbowed at Natsuki's rib. "Anyway, come and help us!"

Mai and Haruka rushed towards the carriage closest to them. They fumbled through the piles of valuables inside the carriage.

However, Haruka suddenly moved to the front, took the reins, and rode the carriage away. "So long!"

Then Nao instantly leapt onto another carriage, grabbed the reins and rode after Haruka's carriage.

"Wait!" Youko was fast enough to catch the princess in her intention, hopping onto the carriage in time. She landed unceremoniously at Nao's feet.

At the sight of the second carriage riding away, the black-clad woman snarled, throwing her axe with all her might. The axe flew into the air and stuck into the wooden panel at the back of the second carriage. A few moments later, Youko carefully stuck her head out from behind the curtains. She glanced at the axe next to her face before turning to look back at the woman rider.

Eventually, the two carriages went out of sight. Natsuki found herself at a loss for words. She was certain that Mai didn't intend to leave her here, but Haruka and the rest might have other plan in mind. She reluctantly glanced at Shou. _Did they say we get only two carriages?_

Shou chuckled. "For old time's sake?"

The black-clad woman looked the other way in annoyance.

"You have to admit that we worked hard for it. We deserve it." Shou smiled as he approached the third carriage. He hopped on and took the reins in his hands.

Natsuki quickly followed. She climbed onto the carriage, but paused when he put his hand on her shoulder.

"Your duty is done for tonight. You will hear from us again," Shou said. Although his words were cold, his gaze appeared to be more relaxed.

Confused, Natsuki backed down, and stood on the path once more. Shou glanced one last time at the black-clad woman and rode away.

_Huh…? No. No. No. No! _Natsuki then sprinted after Shou's carriage, her foggy breaths fuming in front of her face. "Waaaaaaaaait!" But she gradually stopped, staring into the dark road ahead, cursing. Panting, she felt her legs sore from the earlier fight, and she didn't think that anymore running could prove successful.

The woman in black had trotted her horse to Natsuki, laughing. "The old man is merry with his small band, isn't he?" She tapped her foot at the back of Natsuki's shoulder. "Hey, you."

At the touch, Natsuki automatically spun around, taking several steps away. She pulled an arrow from the quiver and aimed it up right at the woman. "Stay away from me!"

Blinking, the woman watched Natsuki with utter surprise. It was the first time the woman had paid attention to her. Then, a hint of uncertainty came across the woman's eyes. "You… Show your face," she commanded.

Natsuki glanced back and forth between the woman and her men. She wouldn't have made it out of her by herself, and she could only think of worse things they could do to her than Shou had.

"Green… Such strange eyes like that…" the woman murmured. She then pulled out her katana from its sheath and flicked Natsuki's veil with its sharp tip. Her jaw dropped as she burst out, "K—Ku—Kurujer!?"

Natsuki squinted, trying to get a better glimpse at the woman. Very few people in this world knew her real surname. "M—Midori…? Oh, my God, is that you, Midori!?" Natsuki's heart bloomed again with hope. She couldn't believe her luck. She was really going back to the Fujino mansion tonight! She couldn't tell how much she had missed Shizuru already.

Letting out a deep sigh, Midori eventually pulled off her veil. She stared down at Natsuki attentively, her gaze filled with doubts and concerns. "You disappeared without a word, Kurujer, and you had my master worried sick. What were you doing with them? Are you one of them from the start? Did they send you to Fuuka Island to spy on us?" Midori's voice lowered, dangerous with skepticism.

"No. No, it wasn't anything like that! It was purely an accident. I found out about Shou-san's identity, and they held me prisoner for the past weeks. They refused to let me go only until now. I really didn't know them before, I swear!" Natsuki then glanced past Midori to the men behind her. They couldn't have been officials, could they? "Well… Does Shizu—"

"Master doesn't know anything about this!" Midori interrupted. "These are my men. Whatever happened tonight is my personal matter and mine alone. Don't you dare speaking of it to Master! I am not as kind as Master is, so you have my warning, Kurujer!"

Natsuki blinked a few times at the woman's frenzied claim. "Okay. Okay. All right. It's your personal business. I won't say a word about it."

Midori grumpily turned away. "Let's go back now…! Master… He'll be pleased to see you."

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><p>Midori opted to ride on the same carriage with Natsuki, but hadn't said another word to her. Not another assumption or accusation. Cherishing the quiet moment after such a long, dreadful day, Natsuki soon slipped into slumber, exhausted to the bone. She couldn't tell how long it had passed when she opened her eyes again and found herself in the same carriage, but alone. All the valuables inside the carriage had been removed. Groggily, she moved to the front and peeked out through the curtains. The other carriages were nowhere to be seen. Her carriage was the only one parked behind the rows of buildings. The streets were quiet and dark.<p>

Natsuki climbed out of the carriage and walked towards the nearest road ahead. To her delight, she spotted the Fujino mansion from the distance. Perhaps, Midori had instructed her men not to go near the mansion, not wanting to stir any suspicion. But where did Midori go? Why didn't the woman wake her up? Natsuki gazed at the long wall ahead, her eyes widened in excitement. She couldn't believe that she was finally back.

_Shizuru. _

At the thought, Natsuki began to move through the dark road. She glanced around before coming to stop at the mansion's wall. She briefly checked her attire, reassured that she had shed off the black garment, and was now in her soiled, brown kimono. Then she climbed over the wall and landed on the soft grass on the other side. As she carefully moved through the vast garden and pond, she saw several maids heading northbound. They were rushing along the lifted, wooden passageway. Aoi was spotted among them. Beaming at the sight of the young maid, Natsuki wanted so much to wave at her or call for her attention, but decided not to. She wasn't sure what had transpired here during her absence.

However, what struck Natsuki was how the maids were holding stacks of clean clothes, while some others were holding buckets of water. They were murmuring to one other, their gazes wide and disturbed. It was rather unusual, and it had Natsuki wonder of the ruckus at this time of night.

Natsuki quietly moved along behind the bushes. Shizuru's room was also located in the north wing. She was eager to find the girl now, although she wasn't sure what to tell her where she had been. She didn't know if it was safe to let Shizuru in on the truth about The Protectors and the princess 'Eiji' was courting, or who Midori really was. In this world, or any other, one could barely draw the line that separated a truth from a lie.

"Leave…! I said, 'leave'!"

"But—"

"Get out!"

Crouching, Natsuki froze upon hearing the shout coming out from the doors some distance in front of her. She was certain that the voice belonged to Shizuru, but the uncharacteristic shouts only sprouted deepest worries within her. _What happened…?_

A look of concern in their eyes, the maids had gathered in front of the dimly lit room. Sitting on their heels, they all bowed, fearful at their master's unusual wrath. All the while, several maids hurriedly moved out of the said room, shutting the shoji doors behind them.

Only Midori, in her fresh, gray-colored clothes, moved to sit next to the closed door. Defiance was visible in her fiery gaze. "Please, Shizuru-sama! Your wounds are serious! Please, let us—"

"I meant everyone!"

"But this is a grave matter—"

"Go away!"

"Shi… Shizuru-sama…" Biting her bottom lip, Midori eventually let her words trailed off. Her head hang in guilt. One hand clinging to the door, she clenched her other fist on her lap.

Midori wasn't the only one who flinched at the ungraceful snap. Natsuki herself felt the thin doors heavier and thicker than they actually were, caging a wounded beast inside. But she felt the tight knot in her chest, not out of fear or disapproval, but concern for the girl.

Megumi, the sixty-year-old head maid, moved on her knees and sat beside Midori. "The doctor was tending to her wounds. But when she regained consciousness, she just chased him away. She just wouldn't receive any of visitors."

When the candlelight inside the room was blown out, Midori let out a defeated sigh. She turned to Megumi. "Shizuru-sama must be very tired. When she falls asleep again, you and the doctor can go in. Should a matter arises, send for me at once."

Megumi bowed in response. "Please be assured that I will do my best to take care of Shizuru-sama."

Shaking her head, Midori got up to her feet and walked down the passageway. Three other maids had stayed behind with the head maid, while the rest began to leave.

Natsuki frowned at the sight of six samurais stalking back and forth in the yard in front of Shizuru's room, their weapons ready. What was with the fierce security? There hadn't been a tight security last time she was here. Something terrible must have happened. Anxious, she wanted to see Shizuru now, but doubted that those maids and guards would allow her. Then a thought struck her out of the blue. Youko's prediction of a death in her place tonight. Chill ran down Natsuki's spine, and she froze in horror. Did Youko mean Shizuru?

_No… No way!_

Natsuki instantly moved towards the passageway, but her abrupt movements caused the rustling sounds. The nearest guard turned her way, and she halted at once. Her brows knitted for the longest time as he continued to stare out into the dark. He was so persistent that she began to feel the numb growing in her folded arms and legs. Even then, she found herself yawning, her eyes watered. Her body was screaming in pain in her position, and she only realized then how exhausted she really was, mentally and physically.

Inwardly grumbling, Natsuki looked up at the doors to Shizuru's room again. There was no way she could get to the girl now without being caught, and, they might spare her life if she were lucky. But, after what happened with The Protectors, she wasn't going to rely on her luck anymore. She stared longingly at the closed doors. The thought of the doctors and the maids around served to comfort her. Hopefully, Shizuru's condition wasn't too serious, considering how the girl sounded fierce in her shouts. Sighing, she warily moved away from the bushes and headed southward to the maids' wing, where her room was.

When Natsuki was certain that she was out of the north wing's proximity, she got up to her feet. "Ah… Ah, jeez… My legs…" Limping through the massive garden, which stretched from the north to the south, she tiredly shook her head at herself. She couldn't believe what exertion she had been forced upon earlier today, or how she came off it like an old woman. She had thought that she was athletic enough to handle it. Then, her light thoughts were rapidly pulled into darker ones. The images of the bodies along the dark path flashed through her mind. They were left dead and cold like a piece of trash, meaningless and pointless. Her fists automatically clenched as she froze in her tracks. She tried to fight off the memories, which were tenacious and merciless, catching and torturing her sanity at any moment she had let her guard down.

Natsuki trudged ahead, hugging herself against the cold wind. Her body was shaken with soreness, chilled to the bone. She kept telling herself that she was too tired to think. If anything, she tried to make herself believe that she had done it before in a life she did not remember—that she was only replaying the nightmare. Before she knew, she was approaching her own designated room. It had been only three weeks ago since she had last been here, but it felt like a lifetime ago. It amused her that everything in this world struck her as an old painting, in which she was here only to repaint over the lines and colors again. The same strokes. The same heartache and pain.

Her feet came to a sudden halt. Natsuki stood a good distance from the passageway in front of her room. It was left dark as she had expected, but the doors were left wide open. Cautiously, she took a few quick steps to the side, partially hiding behind the sakura tree by the pond. It wasn't the set of opened doors that startled her, but the figure lying along the passageway. Someone was sleeping in front of her room.

Natsuki squinted to get a better look. Gradually, she recognized the blue scarf from the distance. It was wrapping around the sleeping figure. It was the scarf Shizuru had lent her the night before they parted. She still recalled how warm it felt when wrapped around her, and anger rose up to her chest at the notion. She took a few deep breaths as she bravely stalked across the field towards the figure. She would demand what was hers back. But then she stopped in her tracks when the figure began to stir, revealing the thick mane of chestnut hair as the scarf slid off her head.

At the rustling sounds Natsuki's feet had made, Shizuru, in her white yukata, lifted her head up. As she lied there, graceless along the passageway, crimson eyes squinted at Natsuki. The gaze appeared confused at first, then flabbergasted.

Natsuki froze in her spot. She also found the scenario so surprising that she wouldn't know how to react. Shizuru had appeared out of nowhere; she even reached the room before Natsuki did. But what was Shizuru doing in the south wing? Had Shizuru been waiting here every night during her absence? Natsuki stared back at the girl, unsure of what to do next.

With some difficulty, Shizuru got up, pulling the scarf closer around her slim shoulders. A pained whimper escaped her lip as she climbed down the passageway. She moved through the yard, though slightly shaken. Each step was agonizing slow, but ever so certain. Her white yukata was tainted with a growing patch of fresh crimson on the left shoulder, the dangerous color so contagious that it caught on to the blue scarf as well. Her gaze was attentive, yet drained. Strands of chestnut hairs stuck to her cheeks and forehead due to the sheen of feverish sweat. Her hands fought the failing restraint, her fingers stretching and folding, clutching the scarf around her trembled shoulders. The blood color on her clothes was a painfully glaring contrast to her sickly pale skin. She looked like a wreck—a ghost in this cold night.

Natsuki could only watch as though someone had painted her dream on a canvas. So tangible. So pensive. The leaves swirled on the ground. The wind whispered to her. Before she knew, Shizuru had come to stand in front of her. Was it a trick her exhausted mind was playing? She wanted to reach out to Shizuru, but was afraid that the girl might disappear at her touch. Instead, she clenched her bruised, bloodied fists, and her jaw clamped shut. She was certain that there were still bloodstains on her face, but she couldn't care less to wipe them off. They bled. Pained, and alone. How their lives were so different, yet alike at the same time. They each had their own path, yet their roads had intertwined into one.

Natsuki stiffened in panic the moment Shizuru's eyes slid closed, the girl swaying on her wobbly feet. She took a step forward and caught the frail form in her arms, both their weights bringing her knees down at the soft plane of grasses. Her body ached at the sudden moves, but she ignored it. Cautiously, she gently cradled Shizuru's head in her arms, trying to make sure that the girl didn't hurt herself from the fall.

Her chest heaving heavily, Shizuru lied flatly on her back, her absorbed gaze staring up at the starry sky. Her lips were moving, murmuring words inaudible to anyone else.

Holding Shizuru close, Natsuki studied the crimson gaze for a long moment, marveled by the beauty she had denied to acknowledge before. Then, she followed the gaze, and looked up at the sky. In the blackest night, the crescent moon shone so brightly above them. Its radiance was rich. Its brilliance graced upon all, the grand mansions and the dark corners of the streets. It touched everything and nothing at the same time. However, a fraction of a thin smile was missing from the yellow orb. Tonight, the moon was almost at the full cycle.

Almost.


	21. C21: The Vanishing Star

**A/N: **Happy new year, everyone! Sorry for late update as I've been very busy the past months.

No beta. Enjoy.

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><p><strong>Chapter 21: The Vanishing Star<strong>

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><p>The first rays of morning light graced the wooden corridor, where the maids were occupying. Some closed their eyes, while the others looked away from the light reflected upon the passageway. A few were nudging the others next to them to stay awake. Light was never welcomed after a sleepless night.<p>

Sitting on her heels, Natsuki found it most difficult just to keep her eyes open. Strands of her raven, sticky hair fell from the hair tie, partially covering her ashen, muddied face. Her bloodied knuckles whitened as she clutched her folded knees, trying to keep her back straight. She was still in her old clothes from last night, her body sore and cold. It must have been the longest night she had ever endured her entire life. It was far from her comfy home in Germany, far away from all the things she had ever imagined. However, what occupied her mind at the moment wasn't the comfort she wished for, but what was happening on the other side of the doors.

Natsuki, along with all the maids, flinched as a graceless scream erupted. It wasn't a short, ragged cry this time, but a drawn-out howl of agony. It sounded like a wounded beast behind those closed shoji doors, caged and pained. Biting her bottom lip, Natsuki got up to her feet, only to be pulled back down by a hand.

Natsuki fiercely turned to Aoi. "What!?"

Retracting her hand, Aoi immediately averted her gaze from Natsuki. There were dark circles around the young maid's eyes, her slender hand shaken. None of them had any sleep as the whole mansion had remained restless the whole night. "P—please, stay calm, Natsuki-san. Shizuru-sama will be all right." After a few moments, Aoi looked up again, anxious. "She will be all right, won't she?"

A deep frown marred Natsuki's pretty face. She sat back down once again. "I… I don't know," she murmured almost to herself.

When they encountered in the garden last night, Natsuki had held Shizuru close, panicked by the girl's bleeding shoulder. She had eventually shouted for help, and soon the guards had found them. Shizuru's condition had gravely worsened by the continual bleeding, and it complicated the matters when she had regained consciousness now and then, struggling against help. Cauterization had been the only solution given.

Natsuki's stomach unsettled as Shizuru's scream continued. She clutched her knees tighter, keeping her gaze on the wooden passageway. "What happened last night? Who did this to her?" Her questions came out a dry, but angry whisper.

Aoi leaned closer to Natsuki, keeping her voice low. "Shizuru-sama had gone to see Keiko-san at the shrine last night. Shizuru-sama did not want to make a fuss over the meeting, so she had only a few guards with her. But, the attack happened. They were fierce men, possibly professionals. It left Shizuru-sama and Kiyoshi seriously injured, and… Keiko-san was killed."

Natsuki froze at the information as she recounted what had transpired. While she was caught in the middle of the deadly ambush, Shizuru was fighting for her life on the other side of the forest. It had been a crazy night, indeed. If only Midori wasn't in the ambush at the time, things might have turned out differently. If only Natsuki was released, and returned to Shizuru in time. Natsuki grimaced as her thoughts darkened. Someone clearly wanted Shizuru dead, and they were absolutely adamant about it.

_They almost succeeded._ Natsuki shuddered at the thought.

It was unlikely that the assassins were just stalking the pair into the woods, but they must have known of Shizuru's plan to meet Keiko. A spy inside the Fujino household? Keiko was used as a bait, but who set up the meeting? At any rate, the bait was dead, and the target was badly injured. If Shizuru survived the injuries, they were unlikely to stop at this. Natsuki briefly glanced around, trying to catch any suspicious eyes around. She had thought that Midori would be the most trustworthy person for Shizuru's safety, but the woman had her own murky secrets as well. It seemed that they all had secrets that they refused to share.

"Does Masaru-sama know about Keiko-san?" Natsuki asked.

Aoi became stoic in her post. "They reported him of what happened. As far as I have heard, 'devastated' was an understatement."

"He's devastated by his lover's death. Hmm. I haven't seen him around even though his daughter might die at this very moment."

Aoi cast her gaze down. "He… He was… It's the first time anyone has seen his tears."

_It serves him right._ Natsuki inwardly cursed. She did not rejoice Keiko's death. But, perhaps, this was karma's doing. Masaru had destroyed his wife and children's lives out of his own selfishness. None of them got what they wanted in the end, and Keiko was now dead, innocently caught in all of this. If only Masaru had allowed things to go as they were supposed to. 'If only' was an expensive question after all.

Eventually, the doors slid open, and all heads snapped, their gazes fixing were upon the figure standing between the parted, shoji doors.

Midori stood, staring down at them, sheens of sweat coated her face. "Shizuru-sama will rest now. Except Aoi, the rest of you may leave."

Natsuki got up and approached the doors. "I want to see her—"

Midori pushed Natsuki's shoulder, causing Natsuki to stumble back a few steps. "Who do you think you are? I'm amazed you're still here even. Go back to wherever you came from. Get out of my face before I lose my patience!" She then sharply looked away, turning to bark more orders at the maids.

Natsuki stood still, studying the fiery-haired woman. Midori's face was pale, and her hands were bloodied. Midori was slightly trembled, although she tried her best to hide it. It must have been the exhaustion from the ambush, the lack of sleep, and then witnessing her master's life hang in the balance. To see how shaken a determined person like Midori was now, Natsuki couldn't help but fear for Shizuru.

"I need to see her," Natsuki said quietly, her fists clenched by her sides.

Midori turned to Natsuki, her face twisted in anger. The veins on her neck bulged as she opened her mouth, growling. "YOU DO NOT—"

"Please."

Midori suddenly paused at the whispered word. A slight shock flashed across her face as she stared into the weary, green pools.

Natsuki looked away. "Let me see her." The words came out before she could stop herself. She wasn't sure if it sound like a command or a plea now. Perhaps, she just wasn't in the mood to watch her manners more carefully.

Midori eventually turned away. Waving her hand, she stalked away along the corridor. "You're allowed only a short visit. She needs to rest… You need it, too."

Natsuki looked up. She was surprised that Midori was concerned for her well-being even in the slightest way. But, at the permission, she wasted not another second to slip through the doors and closed them behind her. She froze by the doors when the maids inside the room looked up, staring at her in bewilderment.

Megumi, the head maid, especially, slightly shook her head at Natsuki's presence. "Shizuru-sama needs her private time," she eventually said.

Even while Shizuru remained unconscious, all the maids seemed to take Megumi's words as their master's own. Promptly, all the maids gathered bloodied cloths and bowls of crimson water. One by one, they exited through the doors on the other side of the room.

Once she was left alone with Shizuru, Natsuki moved on her knees towards the body resting on the futon. Her chest tightened at the sight of several patches of blood on the blanket and the sheet.

Shizuru was partially covered with a white yukata, leaving the wounds on her left shoulder and right ribcage untouched by the fabric. The bleedings seemed to have stopped, and some sort of herbal balm, sticky and dark brown-colored, was applied over the wounds. Even so, the nasty slashes on the shoulder appeared deep, swollen and tender. It terrified Natsuki to recall how Shizuru had previously refused help even with serious wounds like these. The girl had even escaped from her own room to the south wing, where Natsuki's room was. If Natsuki hadn't returned to her room last night, Shizuru could have been lying there, bleeding to death without anyone knowing.

Natsuki was unnerved, exasperated by the thought. What was the girl thinking!? Then, a question abruptly hit her. _Did you… want to die with her? Were you in love with her? _She immediately frowned at herself. She had no interest to know what business Shizuru had with Keiko. Holding back her breath, she anxiously caressed the girl's face. "Shizuru… Can you hear me? I'm back, Shizuru. I came back—"

'…_as promised._' A voice rang distantly in her mind, but Natsuki had no idea who had said it. The whisper was so faint that it could have been easily missed in the wind. But it was still there, echoing melancholy in the darkness of her heart.

There was no response from the girl. Shizuru's eyes remained closed, sheen of sweat covering her skin. Her breathing was heavy and ragged. Her frail body was shivering, agonized whimpers escaping her throat.

For some unknown reason, the sight tore at Natsuki's heart like a rude opening of an old wound. The cut so tangible—so familiar as if it were her own, but she did not know when or how she had felt it before. But this was not the time to ponder. Natsuki briefly shut her eyes, trying to shun the thoughts out of her mind. Biting her bottom lip, she grabbed a piece of clean cloth prepared nearby and soaked it in the washbasin. She then gently wiped off the sweat from Shizuru's face and body.

Shizuru slightly twitched at the faintest of touches. "It… it hurts… H—help…"

A lump forming in her throat, Natsuki froze before her hand eventually fell to her lap. For a long moment of silence, she wasn't even sure if she was breathing at all. Her eyes were red and sore, her arms starting to shake. All of a sudden, the crumpled cloth in her hand felt heavier than a rock. It took her a moment before she reached out again and traced her fingertips along Shizuru's cheeks, softly brushing the sweaty strands of chestnut hair from her face. It frustrated her that she didn't know how to take away the pain. If only she knew.

Out of the blue, the freezing air outside found its way inside. Natsuki began to shudder uncontrollably. How strange that she could literally feel strong gushes of wind blowing right at her, leaving her puzzled as the doors were closed. Quickly, she pulled the blanket up higher to Shizuru's neck, careful not to touch the wounds. But the bitter wind intensified. Natsuki bent and started to rock on her heels, her hands rubbing her arms. But she couldn't stop the shivering as the cold seemed to freeze her from the inside.

Lips quivering, Natsuki squeezed her eyes shut. _What's this…? Cold… It hurts so much… _She couldn't tell what it was. It was colder than a dark winter, but hotter than a cruel summer. She felt as though her body was being ripped to shreds. She bit her bottom lip so hard she could taste her own blood, holding back her screams with all her might. Her jaws clamped shut, her limbs numbed. A wave of agony washed through her whole, crushing her insides. It felt just like when she was pushed off the cliff and drowned in the sea of sakura, just like that night she was transported into the past.

Green eyes shot opened in fright, only to be terrorized even more when she saw that her fingertips began to morph into sakura leaves. Before long, her entire arms became rivers of flowing pink and white, alive but fickle. The leaves began to fall, disappearing into thin air along with her flower arms.

_I… I am vanishing._ Natsuki watched unblinking at the spectacle displayed before her. She wasn't sure what it was, but deep in her heart she felt that it was coming._ I'm going back to my world. Yes, it's happening! _For a split second, she felt utter relief, deep joy flooded her heart. But a glance at the sick girl on the futon stopped her, and it gripped her cold. She tried to reach out for Shizuru, but her hands were gone now. She looked down at herself and found that the ghostly leaves had already eaten up a large part of her stomach. Almost half of her body was disappearing behind the flow of sakura. She looked up at Shizuru again and cried out.

_No. No. No! Noooooo!_

"NO!" Natsuki gasped, her eyes snapped open once more. Her body rocked on her heels as if she was about to fall off her balance. Wheezing, she glanced around her surroundings in panic. _What the hell has just happened!?_ She was still in Shizuru's room, occupying the spot beside the girl. When she realized that she had been unknowingly gripping Shizuru's arm rather harshly, she immediately let go off the girl. Shaken by the peculiar vision, she took a deep breath in, allowing herself a few moments to calm down.

Something had tried to literally tear her apart. Something had tried to wake her, taking her away from this plane of existence. Perhaps, the very entity that had called for her presence to this world was trying to send her back. Whatever it was, she didn't give in. For all the complaints she had made, or how much she had missed her father and friends, she had refused to leave at the last moment. She wasn't sure why, but that there was something holding her back. The bond so ancient—so brittle, veiled behind the planes of time; she could still feel it watching her, breathing through her. She had no idea what had just happened, but she believed that she had traveled a world apart to be here. There was no way that she would surrender so easily now. For what it was worth, she would stay and see it to the end.

Natsuki's shoulders dropped when the hurt finally subsided. She began to breathe more easily, and she could move her limbs freely now. She turned to glance at the sleeping Shizuru, holding back a frustrated sigh. She had thought that the missing bracelet was calling for her, but she could be wrong. It could be 'someone'.

_Was it you that called for me? Are you even real, Shizuru…? Are we? _

* * *

><p>Morning sun reflected upon her fiery, red hair as Nao paced around in the garden of her mansion. It was a beautiful, cold morning, but the princess felt heated more than ever. It had been four days since the ambush. She had been waiting, but there had been no visit from a certain suitor. She had been so bored—so frustrated that she had even decided to have a ride with Takeda Masashi one evening. It was not as disastrous as she had thought. In fact, Takeda had been kind and polite, respecting her more than a certain suitor had.<p>

"So the rumor is true," Nao said, clutching the hems of her sleeves.

Aiko, the princess' young maid, slightly nodded. "It is confirmed that Eiji-sama was wounded."

Nao shot a brief glance at her maid. She noted her dark, silky hair and brown eyes. With its gleaming darkness, it shone brightly in the sun. It lent out the light to Nao's dark, crazy world. It did not matter what had happened, those eyes never lied to her. Aiko would never lie to her.

Nao forced herself to look away. She despised the idea of having to depend on anyone. Not her dead mother. Not her father who never cared to visit her or receive hers. Not her half-brother who only tried to pursue power by marrying her off to a powerful family. She had only herself to rely on. Only when The Protectors came, she had felt what a family was like. They stood by her like no one else had. _But Aiko has…_

"It was outrageous. They dared attack him in Kyoto! How brash those bandits were!" Nao faked a light laugh as though it was an exciting subject. Indeed, the attack had been the hottest gossip in the capital for the past few days. But she had refrained herself from bringing up the topic of 'Eiji', not wanting her maids to _talk_ about it. Last time Shizuru had kissed her, the gossip had spread like wildfire, and she felt deeply humiliated. Though most girls in the capital would feel exactly the opposite.

"Some had said that they weren't common bandits, but professional assassins," Aiko said.

Nao darkly hummed to herself. "An attack on a nobleman? They were surely asking for death."

"Although they were killed in the woods, we haven't found out about their masters. Those men were highly secretive and dangerous."

At the notion, Nao remained silent for a second. "They worked for a noble family," she stated matter-of-factly.

Aiko nodded. "That is what some have speculated."

Nao looked grim at once. An attempt on a nobleman's life was a severe crime, and it was likely that only other noble families were bold enough to risk it. Nao couldn't think of any other reason 'Eiji' was targeted but by being one of her suitors. The competition for her hand in marriage had grown fiercer as Crown Prince, her half-brother, was pressuring her to marry. The Imperial Court was watching. The whole country was waiting for her decision. As long as she tried to delay her marriage, Shizuru's life would be in danger. It would not stop as easily as the assassins were eliminated.

Nao groaned in irritation. She had no idea why she should care for Shizuru's wellbeing as she never even considered accepting the proposal. Furthermore, she had no interest in a man who could not even protect himself (or his lover). Pouting to herself, she looked elsewhere. For some unknown reason, she suddenly found the sight of the cold pond very alluring.

"So… is it true about the singer?" The question slipped through her lips.

Aiko stopped a little at the question. "It is true. She is dead, Oujo-sama."

"How unfortunate," Nao said.

Nao had seen Keiko's performance once when she sneaked into the backstage years ago, and she must admit that the woman had such an angelic voice and marvelous dance moves. It was a great loss, indeed. However, she felt anger rising when she just couldn't seem to kill the smile appearing on her lips. She raised her fan to hide the lower half of her face. "The poor man must be in grief. I shall pay him a visit later this afternoon. Tell them to prepare the carriage."

Her expression voided, Aiko paused for a moment before she bowed. "Yes, Oujo-sama."

* * *

><p>It was a new day, but Natsuki was beginning to feel that it was repeating itself in a tattered, tiring pattern.<p>

She yawned into her left fist. Her raven hair was loosely pulled back, tied by a white ribbon. The collar of her blue yukata slightly slid down her slim shoulders as she uncomfortably shifted on her heels. Her folded legs had gone beyond numbing, but she ignored them. She continually reminded herself how lucky she was that Midori had allowed her to stay here with Shizuru, while she should be back in the south wing with other maids. It had been her double luck that she hadn't seen Lord Masaru anywhere. She was certain that he would disapprove of her presence here.

For the past four days, a two-hour nap was precious as it was sporadic, few and far in between. Shizuru's condition had robbed her of any decent rest. Whenever she began to slip into the depth of slumber, she would soon unconsciously lash out of it. It rudely pulled at her as though she was jolted by a slash of a whip around her neck. She would wake and gasp for breath as if she had been running miles in her dreams. It was tormenting. Day after day, there wasn't much she could do but to watch Shizuru bedridden with fever and pain. Herbal medicines were aiding her recovery, but at a slow pace; it did very little to lessen Natsuki's worries. Given the nonexistence of modern medicines and the poor clinical level, there wasn't much hope to begin with. But, Natsuki knew that she had to be strong now; Shizuru needed all the strength within herself and from those around her.

Natsuki turned to glance at Shizuru's sleeping form, her shoulders slumped in defeat. She held back a sigh, while moving on her knees towards the washbasin next to the futon. She grabbed the white cloth hanging over the edge of the washbasin and soaked it with warm water. Under the cold weather, the water got cold very quickly. It was about time to call for Megumi to change the water.

Natsuki rinsed the cloth, and then began to wipe Shizuru's face fresh again. It had become a ritual for her; she needed to watch over the girl as Shizuru constantly succumbed to the fever. She drew the wet cloth along the girl's brows and closed eyelids. At a positive note, Shizuru's body now didn't feel as warm as she did the past few nights.

"Dead… am I?"

"Huh, not yet." Yawning without covering her mouth, Natsuki used her free hand to lift the edge of Shizuru's pink yukata up, while her clothed hand continued to wipe off the heat down Shizuru's chest.

"Is… my death… to be expected?"

_Okay. Who's talking to me? _Natsuki eventually paused. With her sleepy eyes, she looked up from her task, and was met with the pair of crimson eyes staring right back at her. She blinked. She couldn't tell how long she had stayed stock still, but she was sure that it was long enough that Shizuru cleared her throat a little.

"Oh… my God." Natsuki instantly retracted her hands from Shizuru, puzzled to see a tinge of disappointment in the girl's eyes. She sat back down on her heels and blew out a breath. A wave of relief washed through her, taking away all her fears.

The amused look on Shizuru's face was rapidly replaced by a whimper when she tried to lift her shoulders. Gravity worked fast, and she fell back down without much resistance.

"Don't move! You'd hurt yourself!" Natsuki hurriedly placed a hand over the girl's good shoulder to prevent further movements.

Her brows creased, Shizuru herself appeared shocked at how her body completely failed to accomplish such an easy task.

"Jeez, you almost gave me a heart attack." When Natsuki was certain that Shizuru wouldn't dare to pull such a stunt again, she peered down, and their gazes locked. Natsuki felt her heart heavy as she observed the girl. Obviously, Shizuru looked pale and drained; she was a mess. She looked so fragile as if she might dissolve into dust at a child's innocent touch.

"You're back," Shizuru finally said.

Natsuki honestly couldn't tell the meaning behind those words. She wasn't sure if Shizuru still welcomed her or not. If there was a hint of anger in those eyes, it was well hidden behind the crimson curtain. "Yeah… yeah, I'm back." She found herself murmuring under the weak gaze, her mind still trying to remind herself that this wasn't just a dream. "Good morning, Shizuru," she said as she sat back down.

"Morning, is it?" Shizuru's gaze flickered as she observed her surroundings. A look of curiosity, concern, and then sadness. Surely, Shizuru must have recalled what happened to put her in this dire condition.

Natsuki instantly gripped Shizuru's hand. "You're safe now."

Shizuru looked up at Natsuki, and for a moment, she remained silent. Then she averted her gaze and nodded to herself. Biting her bottom lip, she slowly pushed herself up from the bed.

Natsuki let out a sigh, debating whether to try to stop Shizuru from moving again.

Strands of her thick, sticky hair fell to her face gracelessly. "I… I'm rather thirsty—ah—" Shizuru winced when she unknowingly lifted her left arm too fast.

Shaking her head, Natsuki grimaced as she brought a cup of warm water to Shizuru's lips. "You should lie still. Your wounds are still very tender."

Shizuru slowly sipped the water. Crimson eyes were briefly hidden behind those eyelids before looking up at Natsuki again. And, Natsuki found herself caught off-guard, chained in her spot. The worn-out gaze looked and felt so familiar somehow; it easily lured Natsuki into a place so dark, a place haunted and eerie—somewhere she sensed that she had been before. Natsuki couldn't help but stare at it, drawn to its mystery.

"Thank you. Natsuki is very kind," Shizuru said, breaking their eye contact.

Only then Natsuki was snapped out of her stupor. She took the cup from the girl, lowering it down so fast that the remaining content spilled down onto her lap. "Oh…! Urgh, man," she grumbled at her clumsiness.

Shizuru chuckled softly. She watched her caretaker so attentively that uneasiness began to fill the air around them. Reluctantly Natsuki slowed down the patting on her yukata, slightly blushing.

"Uh—M—Midori will be very excited to hear that you're awake now. I should go tell her." Natsuki trusted that her voice was still even, but she knew that she failed by quite a big margin.

"This is strange." Shizuru smiled slightly wider, shaking her head as if inwardly arguing with herself.

"What is?" Her heart beating faster, Natsuki grew more and more uneasy under such a sweet stare.

"I didn't think that… that I'd be smiling at you. I thought that I'd be angry when you returned, or at least give you a scold, but… I just can't seem to hide my joy to see you again. Tell me that I'm not dreaming."

Natsuki furiously blushed, fixing her gaze down on the tatami floor. She had predicted many scenarios upon her return, too, and being warmly smiled at by Shizuru wasn't one of them. She had thought that she had been the only one looking forward to their reunion. She could not possibly think of what importance she had held to make Shizuru feel so strongly about her return. Only about two months ago, she was just a trespasser, wandering in the girl's mansion.

Natsuki let out a small yelp when she pinched her own thigh. "Okay. I'm not dreaming, so you aren't either," she said, awkwardly staring up at the ceiling.

Shizuru let out a chortle, but was disrupted by a few coughs. Clutching her chest, she directed her gaze elsewhere as if she could hide her pain from Natsuki that way.

"Don't push yourself too hard," Natsuki warned.

"I… am merely… sitting."

"That's right. It means that you are far from being well. You don't want to risk losing those four days we'd tried to nurse you back to health," Natsuki said, a stern crease forming between her brows. She moved closer to the girl and wrapped her arm around her waist. She could feel Shizuru's slight movements in a feeble attempt to keep her position, but she steadied herself. Silently, she waited for Shizuru to come to term with herself and comply. She just wanted to assure the girl that she would be there to catch her.

It took Shizuru only a moment to give in. Wearied, she allowed her weight to fall back into Natsuki's arm, trusting her caretaker to hold her balance. Once she was laid down flat on her back, the blanket was pulled up to her chest. She gazed up at Natsuki, a small smile gracing her lips. "That felt nice," she commented.

The remark came out of nowhere, and Natsuki felt blood shooting to her face. "W—w—what felt nice?"

"To lie down… You were right. I should have listened…" Shizuru teased, even though her voice seemed to lose its strength fast.

Natsuki quickly looked away, grumbling at herself for having such a bad thought.

A corner of Shizuru's lips slightly curved up. "Ara, forgive me, Natsuki. I only meant to say 'thank you'."

"Naaah. My pleasure," Natsuki said casually. It somewhat relieved her that Shizuru still had her lighthearted moments even in this fragile state. She spread out the blanket to cover Shizuru's body, and then stood up.

"W—where are you going?" Shizuru panicked at once.

"Huh? I'm going to sit here." Natsuki was puzzled by the anxious look from Shizuru. She moved to sit at the end of the futon, reaching under the blanket and taking Shizuru's left foot in her hands. She didn't bother to speak as it was just another routine for her; she began to massage Shizuru's foot. She would switch to another foot after she felt that it was warmed enough.

"You… uh, you don't have to do this. The others—"

Natsuki looked up, perplexed yet again by the change of expression on Shizuru's face. Now, Shizuru was actually the one blushing. _What the hell?_ "I've been doing this for four days. It's totally okay. You actually seemed to like it in your sleep even."

"It's been… four… four days?" Quickly, Shizuru's eyes fluttered closed at the comfort and warmth generating along her limbs. She knew that Natsuki shouldn't have to do anything like this for her, but the woman was so good; she selfishly neglected any manners and grace at the moment.

Natsuki let out a big sigh of relief, while continued to massage the foot. "You know, you had us so worried. We thought that you might never wake up again."

"I thought so, too." Shizuru only opened her eyes again when Natsuki suddenly slowed down the massage.

After a long moment, Natsuki asked, "Did you not want to wake up?"

Shizuru slowly raised her right hand and rubbed her eyes in fatigue. "I was in… a very… very dark place. It was all black. Everything. Everywhere. And it was… so cold that I thought death should feel like that." Sighing, she absentmindedly stared up at the ceiling. "I called out for father, but he didn't hear me. I called for help. No one answered."

Natsuki paused. She must admit that hearing what Shizuru had said scared her. It scared her to think of the possibility that Shizuru might actually die. But, she forced out a smile. "But you found light in the end. You woke up from that dream."

Shizuru nodded, offering a small smile back. It seemed like a genuine smile no matter how difficult it looked for Shizuru to just lift her facial muscle now. "Yes… yes, I remember now. Someone had called out to me. She was speaking to me. She said that… she promised to come back for me, a—and I actually felt that… I felt that she had come back. She did. And that was right before I woke up."

"I didn't promise you anything. My return that night was purely coincidental," Natsuki stated with a shrug, continuing the massage.

Shizuru eyed the raven-haired woman. "I didn't mean that it was you. I didn't even know that you've come back."

Natsuki raised her brows. "What? You don't remember that we met in the garden?" She inwardly pouted, her hands squeezing Shizuru's foot a little too hard that the girl lightly yelped.

"We—we did?" For a moment, Shizuru glanced around awkwardly. "I—I must apologize then. I must have been really tired, and my mind wasn't working as efficiently as I would have liked."

"Oh, well. You were badly injured. I shouldn't expect that you'd remember much of it."

"Natsuki is… very understanding…" Shizuru's eyes were closed again. Her breathing became a little ragged, her voice shaken.

Natsuki tried to gauge her energy as she moved up to massage Shizuru's leg now. "So who gave you that promise?" In all honesty, she didn't even know why she should care since it was just a dream. Strangely, she found that she was fast to feel threatened by _this_ person. What power that could bring Shizuru back to life? It was the power she clearly did not possess.

"I don't know. But it doesn't matter now, does it?" Shizuru opened her eyes again and gave Natsuki a weary smile, almost a sad smile of disappointment. "Where have you been? Why didn't you send me a word? I… every night, I waited."

'_I waited for so long…_' Someone had said those words to her long ago—so long ago that Natsuki couldn't remember who it was. But its presence had been there, haunted and trapped, calling out to her in the fragments of her distant dreams.

Natsuki slowly took in Shizuru's words, and felt a soft blush on her cheeks. It somehow comforted her that she wasn't alone in missing the other's company; her sentiment was returned. "I'm sorry. It—it was urgent, and—I didn't think that you'd care to know."

"Have I always seemed indifferent to you?" For some reason, Shizuru did look serious with her question now.

"I just thought that you didn't really want me around," Natsuki said. She did question it from time to time why Shizuru bothered to take her in. It had been clear then that she wasn't the foreign writer Shizuru was looking for, thus there was no reason for Shizuru to keep her around. Perhaps, she had underestimated Shizuru's kindness.

Shizuru closed her eyes again, and muttered, "I thought that you might have gone back to your world. Ara, I've become less and less rational each day passed, haven't I?" Then she let out a shaky sigh. "I thought that… that I might ne… never… see... I…"

Shizuru's words began to slur, and Natsuki could feel her body tensed up in pain. She lowered Shizuru's leg back down on the bedding, and only rubbed her feet to keep her warm.

"N—Natsuki?" Out of the blue, Shizuru opened her eyes and looked up at Natsuki almost in panic. She gulped and relaxed again when she saw that Natsuki was still around.

"I'm not going anywhere, I promise. Now, go back to sleep."

But crimson eyes widened a little more as if to defy Natsuki's order. It was as though Shizuru had had enough of four days of sleep, and she tried to stay awake for as long as she could. "How is father?"

Natsuki's hand movements momentarily slackened, her gaze fixed upon the floor. "I heard that he's been very busy."

After a long silence, Shizuru said, "I do not doubt it. He is a… a very busy man."

Natsuki just nodded in agreement. Masaru had not once visited his daughter. If this was how the man had loved his daughter, no wonder he could lock up his son in a forsaken mansion for years. He kept shoving his messes behind the family's name, and everyone seemed to pretend to not see it. But, did Shizuru agree to Masaru's methods after all? Why didn't Shizuru fight for her brother? What had Masaru molded his daughter into, while he masqueraded her as a tool to fulfill his ambition? Doubts gripped Natsuki's heart, desperately trying to drench out her emotions and leave her conscience bare.

"But your mother has visited. She's been staying here since the first day she'd learned about the incident. She's very worried about you," Natsuki said, keeping her tone even. Her head warned her about this girl, but her heart felt for her.

Shizuru's eyes slightly widened at the mention of her mother, a flash of hope in her eyes. "How… how kind of her. I feel bad that she had to visit me, while she's ill herself."

"She's your mother. It's only right that she came to be by your side now. And, trust me, she looks much healthier than you do at the moment. Hmm. I think I should go tell Midori that you're awake now. Your mother will be super excited, too," Natsuki said, while looking up at the doors.

However, Shizuru suddenly struggled to push herself up again.

Natsuki swiftly turned back to the girl. "What are you doing!? I told you to lie still!" She wanted to grab the girl and force her down, but decided against it.

Shizuru bent, clutching the hem of her blanket. She took a few deep breaths in and looked up at Natsuki. "Please… please, bring Midori here."

Natsuki noted the beads of sweat rolling down the girl's forehead. The girl proved to be too stubborn to argue with. "Why do you always have to prove yourself? You don't have to be 'Eiji' now, you know. You don't have to be what your father wants you to be." As soon as the words slipped through her mouth, she mentally smacked herself at the slip. Having been watching Shizuru in agony for the past few days had only driven her to the edge.

Shizuru's gaze turned cold as she glared back. "It is… none of your business to say what I am, or who… who I am…"

Natsuki instantaneously nodded in an apologetic way. "I'm sorry." But she found herself besieged with frustration. She had no idea what else had Masaru done to his children, but she was rather certain that his actions were not in positive light. And, to see Shizuru so vulnerable, while still trying to reach out to her father, it only angered Natsuki even more. But, Shizuru was right that it wasn't her business to begin with.

Without another word, Natsuki shot up to her feet and moved towards the doors. However, she had been sitting on her heels for hours on end, and her knees buckled. She tripped and fell forward. "Ah!" To Natsuki's surprise, a slender arm had snaked around her waist and pulled her up before she hit the floor. In one fluid move, she found herself fallen back onto the soft futon, a body below her. Her eyes widened at the sudden occurrence; she stayed absolutely still on the bedding. She could hear Shizuru's low, muffled cries of pain, but she was slow to pick up on things at the moment. Her mind was clouded with a certain sensation shooting through her whole. It was _that_ familiar warmth, which was enveloping her, suffocating her. It was all around and inside of her, flying with her into the plane of nothingness. Nothing but never alone. She had felt it before. _Long before this._

Natsuki blinked a few times ever so slowly, and eventually broke from of the reverie. "S—Shizuru?" Alarmed, she looked over her shoulder to see the pair of crimson eyes staring back at her. The gaze looked lifeless, hazy and dull, or at least that was how Natsuki saw it. Natsuki wanted to get out of this uncomfortable position, but debated whether she would risk harming Shizuru further or not, considering that the girl might try to get up and catch her again.

Natsuki huffed. "I told you not to move."

Whimpering, Shizuru closed her eyes. She rested her chin upon Natsuki's shoulder. Her breathing was uneven, her body tensed.

Shizuru's heart was beating so hard and fast that Natsuki could feel its beat against her back. It was as if about to jump out of her weak body. Natsuki felt her heart caught in her throat. "Please, don't do anything crazy like that again. Your wounds—"

"Stay."

The word came so softly that if Natsuki weren't careful, she would have missed it. Natsuki could only sigh. "Don't be silly. You wanted Midori, so I was going to get her—"

"You… promised… that you'd—back… come back for me."

Natsuki froze. She kept her gaze at the doors, not daring to look back at Shizuru. For a fleeting moment, those arms that were wrapped around her felt like a dead weight of a giant snake. There had been no promise between them, hadn't there? But Shizuru kept pondering about the mysterious promise. It scared Natsuki as she, too, had felt the peculiar promise in the bits and pieces of her dreams and visions. But were their promises the same one? Natsuki couldn't be sure if she was the one giving Shizuru the promise since she had never met her before in her own world. She had no memories of Shizuru at all. It was as though there had been absolutely no connection between them.

Her thoughts continued to flow like a wild river. Warmed by Shizuru's embrace, Natsuki felt her eyes give in to the heavy eyelids. She had been very drained herself, and was now easily pulled into a deep slumber._ What do you mean to me? Just how much… do you mean to me?_

* * *

><p>Yumi was sitting out in the corridor, peering through the tiny gap between the shoji doors to Shizuru's room. The maids surrounded her; some were massaging her legs, while the others her shoulders. Chiyo, Yumi's personal maid, had followed from the Fujiwara's Autumn Mansion as well, sitting close to her master, instructing the young maids how to massage her master the way she liked.<p>

For the past few days, Yumi had demanded a report on her daughter's condition on an hourly basis. She had her daughter's room heavily guarded on both entrances. Someone was adamant in seeing 'Eiji' dead, and she needed to find out who it was. This grave matter needed to be dealt with harshly, precisely and immediately.

Megumi, the head maid of the Fujino Mansion, moved on her knees towards Yumi. She was holding a bowl of hot, black, thick liquid. "The medicine is ready, Yumi-sama."

Yumi coughed a little, and then gestured to the floor. "Let us wait a bit."

Megumi bowed in response and put the bowl down.

Then came Midori, who knelt down in front of Yumi and bowed. Her face beamed in delight. "I—I have heard! This is great news, Yumi-sama!"

Yumi lightly raised her hand, suggesting Midori to keep her voice down. "Shizuru is still very weak. She's asleep now."

"Ah." Midori blushed, looking down a bit, embarrassed at her overexcitement. "But… there is also other great news, Yumi-sama. Nao Oujo-sama has sent words that she will be visiting Shizuru-sama this afternoon."

This garnered Yumi's full attention. It was a rare occasion, especially from a wild one like Princess Nao. After the few, most stressful, fearful days in her entire life, this was a pleasant news, indeed. Yumi solemnly nodded and said, "Please give my daughter a few hours more to rest, and then wake her for preparation. Aid her in every step as it will be very difficult for her."

Midori bowed. "Yes, Yumi-sama."

Yumi then turned her attention back to the gap between the doors. She observed the two bodies on the futon inside the room. Many questions stormed through her mind. Old and new worries overwhelmed her now. She inwardly sighed. She was overjoyed to see Shizuru gaining consciousness today, but had hesitated to enter the room when she saw that Natsuki hadn't left. Even though she couldn't hear what the girls were saying, she dared not to interrupt their conversation. Partly because she wanted to observe Shizuru's reaction towards this foreigner. Partly because she had felt the understated attraction between the pair. She wasn't sure what was going on, but she needed to know that Natsuki wouldn't be a threat to Shizuru—in health and marriage plans; Eiji's and Shizuru's own.

* * *

><p>Midori was sitting by the futon, tears in her eyes as she watched her master's peaceful face.<p>

Eyes closed, Shizuru was lying on her bed. Her naked form was covered by the blue, silky blanket. Her long hair was pulled up, soaked and washed in a wooden washbasin. Megumi was sitting next to the hair washer, softly whispering, instructing the young maid what to do.

"Stop crying, Midori," Shizuru said, whilst her eyes still closed.

"I—I am certainly not crying!" Midori brushed her tears away with the hem of her sleeve. She then placed her fists down on her lap again, her expression ridden with guilt. "I did not mean to disturb your rest time. But, it was reported to me that Nao Oujo-sama is planning to pay you a visit this afternoon. I had to come in, and see if y—you, uh…"

Midori scratched her cheek a little as she recalled how she slipped into the room and found her master cuddling with Natsuki. It wasn't the first time Midori had seen her master close to a girl. In fact, she had taken note of her master's bizarre tendency for years now, but she must admitted that it was Natsuki, who surprised her. Natsuki never gave off the vibe, or at least the woman never seemed to hold any particular feeling towards Midori's master. To find Natsuki sleeping on Shizuru's very own bedding, holding Midori's master in her arms, was unexpected and unnerving at the same time. It was going to be a bit hard to look at Natsuki now. Midori would hate the idea if she had to start bowing whenever Natsuki passed.

Shizuru cleared her throat, and gave herself a few moments to breathe. "It… it should be only a short visit. The princess probably wouldn't want to spend too much time around me, so it should… should be fine."

Midori looked up at her master, her heart aching to see the girl murmur in weariness. Four days were hardly enough of a rest for grave wounds like this. It was more than fortunate that Shizuru had regained consciousness, or was even alive at all. She had tried to talk her master out of it, but Shizuru insisted to receive the guest.

"How is Kiyoshi?" Shizuru asked, her eyes still closed.

"He is healing well…, although he might not be able to join the guard team anymore due to his leg injury. I think he is in denial about this."

"It's good enough that he's safe." Shizuru sighed before opening her eyes, and turned to look at Midori. "Where's Natsuki? Where did she go?"

Midori must admit that there was something about her master's voice whenever she uttered the name. She wasn't sure if Natsuki herself had felt it, too. "She's resting in her room, Shizuru-sama. She's very tired. She's been watching over you for days, and hardly had any sleep." She told the truth. As much as she distrusted Natsuki, she couldn't lie about what happened. There were hours in between, which she couldn't fight the exhaustion and fell asleep, only to wake up and find that Natsuki was still awake, closely watching over her master.

But Midori inwardly sighed. It must have been the third or fourth time her master had asked for the woman. It was undeniable that Natsuki was exceptionally attractive. Her beauty was of a rare type, exotic even; her vivid, green eyes were so mystifying that one could only try to look away, but fail. Midori herself was perplexed at how detailed she had described Natsuki's appearance as she normally wouldn't even want to look at her. She knew that Shizuru always had a soft spot for a pretty girl, but something deeper—something more alarming was beginning to transpire between the two, and she wasn't sure if it was a wise move for her master.

"I am grateful for… her care." Shizuru momentarily held her breath as she let the maids reached under the thin sheet of blanket and cleaned her body. She needed to freshen up, readying for the visit. "I do not want her to get ill. Please—" She coughed a bit before continuing. "In your free hours, please make sure that she is fed and warmed in her room."

Midori inwardly screamed. She wanted so much to tell her master to worry about her own health before worrying about anything else. "She is being taking care of as we speak. You don't have to worry about it."

Shizuru seemed to relax a bit upon hearing Midori's reassurance. A sigh escaped her throat, she closed her eyes, her brows twitching.

A look of concern flashed in Midori's eyes as she moved on her knees closer to her master. "Shizuru-sama?"

"I… I just need a few moments." Shizuru turned her head the other way, eyes remained shut. She appeared paler than how Midori had first seen her an hour ago. "Please, inform me when the princess arrives."

Midori glanced at the empty bowl of medicine nearby, relieved that her master had taken it without causing trouble. She then bowed and said, "Yes, master."

* * *

><p>The amount of time Shizuru spent just to get up on her feet terribly frustrated her. It infuriated and scared her at the same time when each movement of her body intensified the pain on her wounds. She knew that she should be lying still for weeks to come, but a princess' visit was not to be denied. Although she hardly had the will and strength to pursue the marriage proposal at the moment, the princess herself had come to her doorstep, indirectly offering a hand to mend their estranged relation after their disastrous, first kiss. It was surprising, but nonetheless a good sign. It held a special meaning when Nao decided to pay a visit to someone, especially one of her suitors, which had never happened before.<p>

With a black hat on, Shizuru was dressed in various shades of blue kimonos, and gray-colored sashinuki. Although the several layers of clothes lent her warmth, their weight bothered her wounds, especially on the shoulder. With difficulty, she moved along the corridor with Aoi, the other maid trailing behind her. The maids were strictly ordered by Midori to follow Shizuru every step just in case she should falter. As much as she wanted to annul Midori's order, she secretly felt that she might actually need help. Her body shuddered as surges of cold waves continually hit her, the aches sharp and heavy. Along the way, she momentarily stopped, and had to lean against the wall, out of breath. The maids were quick to reach her sides, grabbing her arms to ensure that she was on her feet.

Shizuru took a few moments to breathe as deeply as she could. All of a sudden, the echoes of men shouting and screaming began to ring in the back of her mind, and they were getting louder and louder by the second. She shut her eyes, trying to shun out the images of the men charging at her, blood in their eyes—her blood on their blades. Even though she had tried not to show how much it affected her, those savage moments still haunted her. She was hurt. She was scared. But, she just didn't dare to admit it. She knew that she needed to be strong, and that was everyone wanted to see.

"I… I'm fine," Shizuru said.

Aoi and the other maid promptly took their hands away.

As Shizuru moved further down the hallways, she decided to a make a turn to the large section located on the east of the North Wing. It was where her father's quarters was. As much as she had tried to denied, she was saddened by his absence. Even her mother, who had sworn years ago never to come back to the Fujino Mansion, had come to visit and stayed with her for the past few days. Natsuki obviously hadn't dared to talk about her father. Midori, too, had avoided to mention him whenever the question arose. It roused some suspicions, and the only way to find out was to see him. Shizuru didn't expect much, only wishing him good health and a healthy state of mind. Their family was in a rough patch; Eiji was cast away; Yumi had been ill for years; and now Shizuru was injured. If she were to die now, she didn't want to imagine how hard it was for her father to uphold the family's legacy all by himself.

'_I am with child, and it is your father's.'_ Out of nowhere, the thought of Keiko's confession revisited her mind. Doubts began to grow heavier, dragging on far slower than her own feet's sluggish pace.

As she was approaching the designated room, she stopped dead in her tracks. Her hand shot up to cover her nose and mouth. What was the awful smell? She glanced back at the maids, who instantly looked down to avoid her gaze. Not getting any response from the maids, she inwardly grumbled and resumed her walk. Eventually, she reached his room, noting that the doors had been slightly slid open.

"Father—" Shizuru stepped into the room, blinking in confusion.

The room was cold, screens pulled down to block the sunlight. In the shadow, Masaru occupied the middle of the room. He was sitting on his heels, his hands on his lap. He kept his gaze on the body lying on the bedding, the blanket pulled to the lying form's neck. Shizuru squinted, noting the stiff body's darkened skin and bloated face. The face looked unfamiliar, but it couldn't be mistaken; Keiko had been kept here ever since the incident.

Shizuru froze upon realization, her heart skipping a beat. She then looked at her father, who was still sitting motionlessly, unperturbed by the sight, the smell, or a visitor's visit. _What have you done?_

"Father?"

Masaru slowly looked up. The hollowed look in his eyes startled her. As she grew up, watching and worshipping him as her hero, he had always been majestic and beautiful. Now he looked everything opposite to it. His hair was loosely pulled up into a high ponytail, while some strands of hair messily falling down his face. There were dark circles around his eyes. His skin appeared gray, his cheeks bony. His long nails were mudded with blackened crimson. His parched lips compressed, askew in a sad, angry line.

"I heard that the princess is paying you a visit today. It is a great progress. I am proud of you," Masaru said. His voice was composed, but lacked the commanding presence as it usually did.

Slightly winded, Shizuru leaned back against the door. She wanted to look away from the dead body, but couldn't. It would have been a little less heartbreaking if Keiko were just one of her father's affairs. It would have been better if Keiko was just a singer to her, not a friend. But in death, Keiko had proven that she had meant more. The singer had not only left strong memories with her father, but she had marked Shizuru's journey to Kyoto, the beginning of the trek along the path of life, love and rage. Keiko was to stay in their memories for a long time to come whether they wanted it or not.

"Nao Oujo-sama wants to visit Eiji, not me." Shizuru couldn't quite believe what she had just said. She had rarely ever let slip of her own thoughts, considering it a flaw. Her father didn't need to hear her opinions. Her mother didn't need to know how she needed an embrace. Eiji didn't need to care how apologetic and regretful she had been. She was just living the role her family needed her to, nothing more. But, seeing Keiko here—seeing her father's secret bare, his heart broken, she needed a moment of truth herself.

Masaru blindly nodded. "You have done well, and you will continue to do so. You are our family's only hope." The words came out so fluidly as usual. They were _the_ codes she must live by.

But, seeing her father in this state, Shizuru wasn't sure if he was solely responsible for all of these messes. It was something that seemed to have been his burden as well. Possibly, he was forced to do things he did not want like she was now, and the experiences had shaped him into who he was today. But, Shizuru pulled her thoughts together before her emotions could take over her reasons. Unfortunately, it didn't matter what had led them to this point, everyone must pay for what they had done.

"But I'm not. I can't be everyone's hope." _I don't want to be._ Shizuru continued to speculate Keiko, and it rushed her back to the details of the night of the attack. She had been fighting for her life. As she gave her true name to Keiko, it was the only time in which she had embraced someone and dared to admit a truth. _A truth._ The notion seemed so alien to her that it staggered her. Tears shot to her eyes, and she muttered, "Father, please, you have to let her go—"

"Let her go!?" Laughing bitterly, Masaru rose to his feet, stalking towards her. "She is dead because of you! You should have protected her. She should have been alive!" He pressed in, his steps aggressive. His narrowed eyes scrutinized her. "Why were you meeting with her that night? What business did you have with her?"

Shizuru watched him in horror, her back pressed against the wall. After what had happened to their family, she couldn't believe that all he could think about now was what went on between Keiko and her. Perhaps, it had been so all along, but she hadn't realized it until now. One would see ugliness around them only when they wanted to. She could only watch her father as if he was a stranger.

"She asked to see me. She wanted to tell me something," Shizuru replied calmly.

After a moment of contemplation, a look of horror flashed across his eyes. "It was you then, the one visiting her at night, the one she hid from me." He was murmuring, his tone accusing.

_What?_ Shizuru tried to recall the evening visits at Keiko's home. Nothing of that sort happened, though Keiko had tried. "It wasn't anything like that—"

"She made me wait, sometimes for hours, so that she could have her time with you first. It was… it was _you_," Masaru growled in her face.

"It's not what you think—"

He grabbed her shoulders, shaking her violently. "Do not lie to me! What had you done behind my back!?"

Shizuru tried her best to ignore the sharp stings on her wounds. She gazed up at her father, and for once in her life, she had to admit that she was very afraid of him. "S—she didn't even know that I'm not Eiji!"

"Did you trick her? Did you lie to her, give her hope?" Masaru tightened his grasps on her. His eyes were wide, his gaze empty. "You did wrong! You took her away from me. You killed her!"

Shizuru pushed her father away and took a few steps away from him, hand clutching her wounded shoulder. Her knees were as she tried to keep her balance. "It… it isn't about me. She was Eiji's lover. How could you do this to him!?"

Masaru caught her by the collars and pushed her down to the floor. There was no regret in his eyes, only rage. "She was mine. _Mine_!"

Wheezing, Shizuru clumsily crawled away. She wasn't sure if she could take another abuse from him before it would tear her wounds open, if it hadn't already. Then, something eventually dawned on her, and she suddenly found her voice dry. She looked up and studied him for a long moment.

Hand on his chin, Masaru was now pacing back and forth beside Keiko's body like a dog guarding his dead master. His eyes darkened, widened in a horror seen only by him. The air around him was wet and cold, deadly and vicious. It was no wonder nobody had wanted to talk about him to her prior. His quarters was now a disturbing labyrinth no one wanted to enter, fearing that they would never get out.

"Was it you? Were you the one who poisoned Eiji years ago?" Shizuru blurted out before she could stop herself.

Masaru eventually stopped his pacing, his eyes looking elsewhere, but there was neither refusal nor admission.

Shizuru felt her blood run as cold as his. Her body trembled as she tried to get up to her feet, but failed. Everything happened for a reason, and they just couldn't stop it. Something backfired, and they had no way to avoid it. "Keiko… She told me that she was with child. It was yours… You deserve this," she said. She watched him as he slowly turned to stare back at her, his gaze voided. She watched him as her words took their time in cutting his heart open and bleeding it dry. Any sign of love, hate and anger, were ripped out of his soul. Nothing. There was nothing left in the dark as light burned all.

Without another word, Masaru stalked across the room and came to stand in front of Shizuru again. She suddenly found herself curled into a ball. He had kicked her at her injured ribcage. For some odd reason, he always knew how to get her, mentally and physically.

Peering into the room, the maids closest to the doors shouted out. "Shizuru-sama!" Masaru would have successfully repeated his assault if not for the maids coming between them.

"Shizuru-sama, are you all right!?" Aoi rushed into the room.

Amidst the maids' cries of horror, Shizuru violently coughed as she tried to catch her breath. Gritting her teeth, she hugged her midriff with both arms, trying to still her body. She didn't want to show any weakness—not in front of this man.

Without another word, Masaru walked back to sit beside Keiko once more. His gaze traveled around and then fixed upon a spot in the dark corner. If only one could reach out to him now, to see where he really was.

* * *

><p>Her body voided of any strength, Shizuru allowed the maids to pick her up from the floor. Graceless and shamed, each of her arm was draped over the maids' shoulders. They carefully carried her out, and only when they were much further down the hallway that they finally helped her to sit down.<p>

"Shizuru-sama!" Midori came running down the corridor. She knelt down in front of her master, breathless. Noting how pale Shizuru looked, she sharply turned to look at Aoi. "What happened!? I told you to watch her!"

Aoi looked down, her lips quivering. "It—it was Lord Masaru. H—he, uh—"

"I'm fine… or I will be." Shizuru forced out the words, turning to Midori. "I was starting… to wonder where you've been. Now…, help me to the central hall, please." Midori had served her for many years, and Shizuru knew that she could hardly lie to the woman. She was genuinely grateful that Midori decide to remain quiet to her absurd suggestion, or what had just transpired between her and her father.

"Nao Oujo-sama will be pleased to see you today," Midori said as she gently wrapped her arm around Shizuru's waist, pulling her up to her feet.

Shizuru closed her eyes. She had to admit that she felt safe whenever Midori was around, trusting that Midori would protect her from all harms. Often times, Midori had acted like a big sister in her desperate times. Just when her family was falling apart, it was strange to find strength and comfort among those who served her.

"I never… never thought that it'd hurt this much." Hearing the older woman chuckle, Shizuru opened her eyes to witness it out of curiosity.

Dragging her master along the hallway, Midori smirked as she glanced at the girl a bit. "What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger."

"Ara, it scares me whenever that you might be right."

"I'm always right. Well, most of the time." Midori shrugged, and her expression grew darker. "You know that you don't have to do this. I can send words to Nao Oujo-sama that you are in no shape to receive any guests today."

Shizuru could hardly feel her legs at the moment. She shamelessly hung onto Midori's shoulder, letting the woman to carry her weight. But, she still considered it a favor on her part that she didn't just let herself slip into unconsciousness; it would leave the maids in a ruckus like that night they tried to move her from the garden back to her room in the north wing. She mentally smiled as she thought back to the faint memories of that night; the large, crescent moon shining brightly above; incoherent flashes of the guards picking her up from the grass, rushing her inside the mansion; the yells and screams from the maids around her. Amidst the chaos of dreams and memories, there was one thing that she couldn't seem to forget: the deep set of familiar green eyes.

_Natsuki Kruger._ Shizuru felt her heart beating faster at the thought of the woman.

Though they had gotten to know each other for a while now, Shizuru still wouldn't consider Natsuki a close confidant just yet. However, those eyes were so alluring—so spellbinding that it had seemed to stop the time; its power could take Shizuru to strange places. They were places she hadn't been to before, but she felt them in the back of her mind. With Natsuki, sometimes it felt though she was reliving her dreams. It felt as though she was replaying the role she once had, speaking the lines which had already been written for her. In the deepest bottom of her heart, the tiny spaces hidden in the darkest shadow of her soul, she had sometimes sensed the coming of events. Her instinct had been uncanny, and there was nothing she could do to change or ignore it. At times, it scared her when her whole world seemed as simple as scripted. If anything could feel crazier than this, she felt as though she had met Natsuki before, somewhere long, long ago. Natsuki, as she was flesh and blood now, seemed only a written character waiting to happen.

_Natsuki Kruger. Kuga Natsuki. Who are you…? Who am I? _Shizuru stiffened a little at the thought. Natsuki did happen that day; she woke up inside the mansion's guarded walls. If Natsuki was 'written' to happen, Shizuru herself couldn't be sure if she was actually herself at all. Then a thought nagged at the back of her mind. _In the old notebook, Natsuki Kruger lived to be an old, bitter soul. Alone and sad… But, on this day, what should I do? _

"Would you like to go back to rest? I can cancel the appointment for you," Midori said, her words pulling Shizuru back from her trancelike state.

"Oh… Ah…" Shaking her head, Shizuru brushed the strange thoughts from her mind. She needed a clear mind to get through it, not some fragments of imaginations and eerie dreams. Crimson gaze then traveled into the vast, well-cared garden just beyond the long passageway she was walking on. She wondered how a beautiful place such as this felt so hellish at the moment. She took in a deep breath, coming to term with herself. "No. No, I need to be there. A serious matter needs my immediate attention."

Midori sighed as she tightened her grip around her master. "Whatever you wish, Master."

* * *

><p>The soft, pink rays of light shone through the opened shoji doors, flooding the spacious room with some warmth in the cold, late afternoon. It was getting dark as Nao had arrived later than scheduled.<p>

A few feet away from the screen, the princess was sitting onto the matted floor, her hands clasped together on her lap. Her gaze reluctantly lifted up and pierced through the screen, observing the person on the other side. She had debated whether she should make the visit after all. The gossips had already spread among the elites even before the actual visit happened, indirectly putting the pressure on her. To make the visit seemingly her usual exploit, she had calculated exactly when and how long she should make the other party wait to gain most attention for this rare appointment. She had wanted Shizuru to realize it, to take it to heart.

But, what Nao was seeing in front of her was far from what she had expected. A screen separating them, Shizuru was sitting with her head dip in an uneven pattern, her body struggling against the ungraceful bend. It looked as though Shizuru would collapse any moment now. Nao decided that, perhaps, she had taken too long to visit. She had no idea how ill Shizuru had been.

"Are you all right, Eiji?" There came the greeting from the princess. Shizuru straightened herself, and Nao blinked at how one simple sitting position could look so painful for someone.

Shizuru took a deep breath in before smiling slightly. "It's very generous of you to… to pay me a visit today. To what do I owe this honor?"

Uneasiness rose in her chest. Nao got up to her feet and strode towards the screen, lifting it up and slipping to the other side of the room. She felt chill running down her spines as she crossed the line separating them. Slowly, she sat down next to Shizuru, and placed her hand over the older girl's forehead. Her eyes widened in alarm, her hand shot back to her chest. "You're burning!" From what she had heard, Shizuru was only mildly injured, far from a life-threatening condition. "You're unwell! You should be resting, Eiji! Why didn't you tell me?" Then, her own words resonated in her own head; Shizuru wouldn't have to stay up if it weren't for her 'unusual' visit.

It puzzled Nao to see Shizuru smiled wider. Although the crimson gaze appeared dull, a hint of mischief did briefly spark behind that veil of exhaustion.

Shizuru sighed softly. "I'm glad to see you here, Nao."

It touched Nao's heart whenever Shizuru spoke her name in such a casual, earnest tone, just like how they were when they were younger. No talk of marriage proposal, which was suggested by someone else, the idea followed obediently by Shizuru. No pressure of satisfying everyone around them but themselves. Even though during the past two years Shizuru had adopted and mastered her social mask (instructed and advised by Lord Masaru, surely), there had been a few times she would slip and be that friend Nao had grown to like.

Nao couldn't help but lazily shrug with an honest smile. "Well, I'm glad to see you, too. I really didn't know that your condition is serious. They didn't tell me much about it. I guess that they didn't want to worry me."

Shizuru raised her brows. "_You_ would worry about me," she stressed as though in disbelief.

Nao rolled her eyes, leaning back a bit, relaxed in her post. "We're friends. It's perfectly fine for me to worry about you." The words slipped out so easily from her mouth. It sounded so natural. It should have been a relief on her part to get it out, making certain that their marriage plan had no future. However, for some unknown reason, she felt the strange disappointment when Shizuru nodded in agreement almost too quickly.

"Yes, you're right." Shizuru chortled.

Nao couldn't help but stare at her friend, mesmerized by Shizuru's perfectly sculpted face; the set of thick, dark eyelashes; the smooth, lovely curves of her lips; the straight, delicate nose; the mysterious, yet expressive eyes. How could a man possess such a rare beauty? How had her friend grown to be something totally different from what she had expected? She still recalled their specific meeting five years ago. Although it wasn't the first time she got to meet 'Fujino Eiji', but it was the first time they got to talk. She vividly recalled how thin, shy and awkward Shizuru had been among other boys. It had taken Nao a few hours to finally get Shizuru to speak to her. Nao had thought that the boy was eccentric, though somehow enchanted by his secretive, soft smile. They had grown much closer, but Shizuru would only be herself and relax whenever there were just the two of them.

Until _the_ kiss happened about a week ago.

Nao found her thoughts slip into the unwelcomed territory. As she delved deeper into the land of unknown, she began to feel unsettled by the odd feelings in the pit of her stomach. Her body tensed up at the sensation. She tried to brush the thoughts away, but found it hard to achieve when Shizuru had abruptly turned and caught her gaze. "W—what—what are you looking at?" Nao stuttered in panic.

Shizuru's gaze dimmed. Her hand clutched at her chest as she breathed harder, her body slightly shivering. "I should keep my distance from you… for the time being. They'll certainly try again, and I wouldn't want any harms upon you."

The princess frowned at Shizuru's worries for her safety. It wasn't what she had expected at all. Instead, she felt a heavy pang of guilt as she thought that she was the true reason of this attack. Although Shizuru was a young, popular noble, she had never tried to extend her power over others in court; she never made enemies. In fact, for a charismatic, bright aristocrat like 'Eiji', it seemed as though that Shizuru had always tried to stay out of spotlight. The attack that night couldn't have sprung from any other reason but the marriage proposal itself. She thought grimly as she feared what the Takeda family might do next. If she prolonged her decision on the marriage, the longer time she'd put Shizuru's life in danger.

Nao sulked, her gaze determined. "That's nonsense. No one will dare to touch me. Besides, I can protect you." _Really well, too._

Shizuru's gaze darkened, fears and uncertainties swimming in the crimson gaze.

"What are you afraid of?" Nao glowered at the older girl, her tone curt. She had no idea why she grew impatient all of a sudden. Or, perhaps, she had already grown impatient for the past few days. If this visit was to lessen the fire in her heart, it did exactly the opposite.

"I cannot risk your well-being."

"Do you deem me so important, or do you just not want to see me?"

"Don't be silly, Nao. Your safety must come first." Shizuru tried her best to suppress her cough, her fist hovering at her lips. "This… is really not a good time for us to meet. If something happens to you… like it did Keiko, I would never forgive myself."

Nao sat still, her gaze softened at the notion. She noted the beads of sweat trickle down Shizuru's ashen face, her lips almost purple. Before she could stop herself, she moved on her knees and pulled Shizuru into her arms. She gently guided Shizuru's head to rest against her arm, allowing her friend to lie down. Shizuru offered no resistance to her touch, shivering uncontrollably against her. As their bodies were pressed against each other, the sensation became raw and unnerving. It was totally unlike the usually reserved 'Eiji' she knew.

"You really need to go back to rest," Nao said, her voice hard with concern, full of authority.

Shizuru remained cocooned for a moment before glancing up at Nao, and the princess staggered at the sight. Shizuru cuddled, looking almost too comfortable in her post, her gaze dazed and murky. But, it was those eyes. How it looked honest and scared now; it was one of those rare chances to catch a glimpse of the truth behind that dark, hypnotic gaze.

They had known each other for several years. Nao had learned of Shizuru's quiet, secretive methods, while Shizuru had learned of her brash, untamed ways. She would climb past the walls and run off into the markets, knowing that Shizuru would somehow find her. Or, if she was lost, she would somehow find where Shizuru was, knowing where the older girl liked to hang out at. While she would break the rules whenever she wanted to, heedless of what the others might say, Shizuru would work her way around it and made the outcomes seem ordinary, its flaws slipped unnoticed. Even if their methods differed, Nao knew that their paths would always meet in the end.

Nao debated whether to call out for the maids or not, partly unsure if Shizuru would want to leave her embrace considering how comfortable she looked. In silence, she studied the delicate face below hers. The sun was setting, and Shizuru slowly blinked as her gaze drifted away in the soft evening light. Nao found her breath hitched in her throat. How could a man be so fragile—so beautiful? 'Eiji' was everything opposite to the man Nao had imagined to be her husband. Then, a simple truth dawned on her; she wasn't actually looking for a brave soul like Takeda Masashi, but she was magnetized by the enigmatic ways of 'Eiji' instead. It sucked her in. It drowned her. Such a weakness. Such a deadly trap.

Nao leaned down closer to the pale face, her gaze fixing upon the pair of lips only an inch below hers.

"We should not marry."

The whisper came, and Nao paused. Her embrace suddenly turned cold as those words registered in her mind.

Shizuru struggled out of the princess' hold and sat up again. She pinched the bridge of her nose, groaning a bit. Her gaze contemplative, she eventually turned to look at Nao. "You always talked of freedom, but I never really listened, did I? Now, I think… I think that I'm beginning to understand it." She offered the redhead a wide, genuine smile. "You've always been right, Nao, and what a fool I've been." She sighed happily in relief. "I would love to be your friend again, and there will be no more talk of marriage. I should have respected your wish long time ago, not pushing it upon you like I have. I've been very selfish, a terrible friend. For that, I am very sorry. Will you forgive me?"

Nao stared unblinking at the older girl. She couldn't quite believe what she was hearing. It felt as though she was slapped out of slumber, rudely kicked out of bed. Her dream was shattered by a killer smile even before she realized that she had a dream. "You…" Nao tried to find her voice. "You are not dying, are you?"

Shizuru chuckled. "I try not to."

"L—Lord Masaru is fine with this?" Nao quickly averted her gaze away from Shizuru. All of a sudden, she was afraid that her friend might see something that she had just begun to feel, the emotion she still didn't know how to hide it.

Shizuru feebly shook her head. "No, but don't worry about it. I'm doing this for us. We can do whatever we like now, just like you've always wanted."

"Oh—ah, right. Yes. Yes, of course." _What am I saying? What have I always wanted?_ Nao absentmindedly wondered. What had led her to this? The marriage was supposed to happen, and she was supposed to hate the idea but somehow went through with it. This wasn't how she was supposed to feel. She didn't pay the visit today, expecting this to happen.

Shizuru leaned closer to the princess. "Nao?"

Nao jumped at their close proximity. "Yes, of course!"

"I thought that you'd be glad that we finally agree not to marry. Or, are you disappointed now?" Shizuru gave her a playful wink.

Nao felt the hurt in her chest to see how Shizuru tried to be gentle with her even though they both knew how hard it was for Shizuru to be up still. At the thought, Nao sprung up to her feet, her clenched fists hidden beneath several layers of her sleeves. Her action surely startled Shizuru, but she offered the widest smile at her friend. "Don't be absurd! We will celebrate like our old times. Of course, when you are well again."

Shizuru smiled. "I am looking forward to it."

Nao turned away, stalking towards the exit. "It's getting late. Get some rest, Eiji. I would like very much to have you healthy enough and go hunting with us next month. Takeda Masashi is getting on my nerves. I need you to be there to keep him away from me." She kept tone light and cheerful, while striding fast out of Shizuru's sight, not waiting for a response. She could catch a mumble in agreement behind her, but didn't dare to look back.

Aiko, Nao's maid, who had been waiting for her master by the exit, readily got up and followed.

Several maids of the Fujino Mansion bowed as Nao strode down the passageway. They, then, hurried towards the room where the princess had just left. Presumably, they were getting to help Shizuru back to her quarters.

_What… what's this feeling?_ Nao panicked when her feet felt light, her knees wobbly, though she tried to keep her confident strides. She was perfectly healthy, and she believed that the meeting had been pleasant. One of her suitors had backed down; she should be celebrating for one less nuisance in her life. Before her thoughts would spiral down the perilous path—before she would turn around and run back to check on her friend, her feet came to a sudden halt when she saw a figure moving closer from the opposite direction.

Natsuki was approaching. The raven-haired woman was in a navy-colored kimono, her ponytail bouncing over her left shoulder. Her lustrous, green eyes were the first Nao had recognized from afar. In such simple clothes, the woman still shone under the darkening, peach-colored sky, her milky skin capturing the gleam of the last sunlight of the day. She didn't look like a static, untouchable beauty in the paintings, but a moving, raw beauty in the wild, so striking that one had to stop and look. Nao inwardly growled at the notion, refusing to understand why Shizuru had taken the woman in despite their difference in class.

Slightly out of breath, Natsuki only slowed down when she spotted Nao. Her face hardly knew how to hide her emotions, and she obviously wasn't delighted to see the princess.

Nao briefly glanced at Aiko. "Wait for me at the carriage."

With that, Aiko bowed and walked down the passageway.

Standing only a few feet apart, Nao stared at her fellow Protector. She couldn't tell why she disliked the fact that Natsuki was wandering around in the Fujino Mansion as a woman. It was now obvious that Shizuru tried to masquerade her toy as a man, trying to keep Natsuki away from other men's reach. How important Natsuki was to Shizuru?

"Yeah, hello to you, too." Natsuki broke the ice, and tried to pass.

Natsuki didn't mention the ambush that night, at least not here, and the feeling was mutual for both of them. But the ambush wasn't what they had stopped and stared at each other, and they both knew it.

"Where are you going?" Nao was fast to move to block the woman's way. She knew exactly where Natsuki was heading to, but for some very odd reason, she completely disapproved of the idea. As she asked the question, she found it hard to look into the green eyes, secretly fearing that she might have no absolute solution herself. Slowly, she realized herself losing the authority she had always possessed. What was happening to her that she couldn't even meet a commoner's eyes?

Natsuki took a step back from the princess. "I'm going to Sh—to Eiji. He needs to rest. He's been bothered enough for today."

"He has many maids to take care of him. What are you to him?" The question slipped through her lips before Nao could stop it.

"I'm a friend. Is that all, Your Royal Highness?"

Nao wouldn't budge. "If you want to pass, get on your knees and crawl."

Her fists clenched, Natsuki glared at Nao. "You are no princess. You're a thief. A murderer."

Nao chuckled. If she found something funny, she wasn't sure what. "You are not different from me now, Kuga. You stole. You killed. You helped us."

"You held me hostage. You held me prisoner for weeks! I did it only because I was forced to, but you did it because you wanted to."

Nao scoffed. "We did what was necessary."

"Enough with the lecture. I don't care about honor or glory. It's all bullshit." Natsuki pushed her way past the princess.

Nao, being of smaller stature, stumbled back a few steps, but swiftly gained her balance. She glowered at Natsuki's back. "You dress freely in this mansion."

Natsuki paused, raising her arms to inspect her clothes. "Yeah. So what?"

Arms across her chest, Nao forced out a smirk. "I wonder why Eiji tried to masquerade you around as a man."

"Oh, not this again. For whatever reason, it really is none of your business," Natsuki said, sighing in exasperation.

A hum escaped Nao's throat. "But it is only natural for me to want to know what my future husband is up to, considering all the dangerous things happening around him these days."

'Husband'. The word worked like magic. They both stood, unmoving. Nao's gaze was determined and intense, while Natsuki's wandered in confusions and uncertainties.

Natsuki was the first to look away. She stared into the distance as if her mind was clouded with heavy thoughts. "It's for my safety." Her answer came short, and Nao believed that there were more to it.

"But you are no longer safe. You are one of us, The Protectors."

Natsuki's brows twitched; she was clearly agitated now. "Yeah, go back to looting and killing. I don't really care what you believe in, or what you do. I just don't want to see your face now." With that, she strutted off.

But, Nao was quick to grab Natsuki's arm, sharply turning the woman around to face her. "Is that what you think? Does a peasant think so simply? Looting. Killing. Were that all you see? Kuga, you cannot escape your fate. No one can."

Natsuki took a moment to stabilize her feet and stared down at the smaller girl. "Neither can you. It doesn't matter if you're a princess or not, you can't win all the times. And these—" Natsuki scoffed as she studied the princess' several layers of clothes. She brushed her fingers over Nao's shoulder, causing the princess to back away in disgust. "You can't hide your true self beneath your fancy clothes. I can't. Eiji can't."

A frown came upon Nao's face. "What do you mean? What does he got to hide?"

Natsuki staggered for a moment before glancing the other way. "Everyone has a secret, don't they?"

"You seem to know him really well," Nao said through her gritted teeth.

Natsuki eventually let out a defeated sigh. "If… if you really want to know… I have no home and no money, so Shi—Eiji took me in. He's been very generous to me. He brought me to Kyoto, because he wanted to help me find my way back home. We were complete strangers to each other, I swear. There's nothing going on between us."

Nao inwardly stumbled at Natsuki's last words. Why would Natsuki suggest anything like that? She was certain that she didn't harbor any feeling for 'Eiji', but she just didn't want to be upset by a commoner. A princess had her honor.

"I'm stuck here, because I've got nowhere else to go. But you, Nao, go back to The Protectors. Maybe that's where you truly belong." Natsuki mildly shrugged. "Eiji wants to marry you, because his father tells him to. When he gets you, he will change. He'll become someone else. He doesn't love you." With that, Natsuki turned around and headed towards the direction of Shizuru's room.

This time, Nao had made no move to stop the woman. She just stood there, watching as the sky darkened, the air thickened and cold around her. No one had dared to talk to her this way. No one had ever dared to lay down the ugly truth before her. She couldn't outright deny Natsuki's statements; the woman was probably too careless to lie to her. Her face cold, her body trembled. While Shizuru's smile kept flashing in her mind, Natsuki's words thundered in her ears. She was a princess, but she felt her dignity destroyed by a commoner. Someone had taken her heart ransom. Someone had made a fool out of her, making her feel what she should not. Someone must pay.

* * *

><p>Full moon adorned midnight sky. The wind was cool, but calm tonight.<p>

In her black, tight attire, the lower half of her face was hidden behind the black veil. Nao was alone, standing atop the roof of the north wing of the Fujino Mansion. It wasn't a mission designed by The Protectors. It was driven purely by her rage to overcome all foes—to defeat her destiny. It was what she had been trying to achieve all through her years. No one could dictate where her life would lead. Only recently that her determination had been threatened by a weak heart, and she needed to stop it.

She got down to her knees and pulled out a slim, bamboo-made projectile. She put her lips at one end and blew it, sending the first dart into the neck of the guard standing in the yard below. She delivered the second dart at the other guard some distance away from the first. The poison worked quickly. In a short amount of time, both of the guards began to sway on their feet and fell flat on the ground, unconscious.

Nao glanced around one more time before leaping off the roof, somersaulted in midair and agilely landed on the plane of grass. She straightened up, and looked up at the room before her. Having the guards around was a giveaway; it must have been Shizuru's private room. However, she couldn't help but grimace at how inexperienced the guards seemed to be. She had expected more fun, a bloody event even. Glancing at the two prone forms on the grass, she shook her head in disapproval. These men wouldn't be able to protect Shizuru at all.

Fast and nimble like a mountain lion, Nao climbed over and rolled along the lifted passageway. Swiftly, she slid down to her knees, her hand softly pressed against the shoji door as she pressed her ear against the plane. Nothing. Not even a sound of breathing. It was strangely quiet. Carefully, she slid the doors open and entered. Once she was inside, she instantly slid the doors close. It had taken only a few moments to gain access to this room, and her heart grew heavy in worries that the security was shamefully inadequate.

Pulling out a knife from the tiny, ankle scabbard, Nao turned around to inspect the room, but suddenly frowned. The bedding was present, an untidy blanket pooled in the middle. It took her a moment for her eyes to adjust and realized that the room was actually empty.

_Hmm._ All of a sudden, she didn't want to particularly imagine where Shizuru was at the moment. In truth, she wasn't even sure what she was here for, but she just couldn't go to sleep without achieving anything; be it chaos or tragedy. She didn't want to see Shizuru again, that was for sure, but she wanted to get back at such a disgraceful rejection. No one could reject a princess.

_This is stupid._ Nao grumbled at herself. She shouldn't be here at all, risking being caught. To think of all the possible consequences to come if she were caught, she could imagine how furious Shou would be, not to mention the whole Imperial Court in chaos. Above all else, she didn't want to be humiliated by Mai; she just couldn't seem to get along with a peasant after all. But, one's social status should not be all they were. Being a princess herself, she had realized how nasty one could be even with the highest of ranks in society. It was all power and business, and integrity was something as foreign as a bottle of perfume from the mainland.

Nao put the knife back into the scabbard. Lazily, she moved around the room, inspecting Shizuru's belongings. Before her mind would return to delve around Shizuru's current whereabouts, Nao turned her attention to the cabinet. She wouldn't go back empty-handed, or she knew that it would be the longest, cruelest, sleepless night for her. Going through the clothes, she was certain that this was Shizuru's room, but she found it amusing that there were both men and women's clothes in the drawers and the wooden chests.

Nao paid no attention to the fallen pieces of clothes on the floor, and continued to ravage through the piles. Then, she suddenly halted. In the dark, her hand found a wooden box hidden beneath the piles of clothes, kept at the farthest corner of the cabinet. She grabbed it and pulled it out. Carefully, she opened the box and found a pair of bracelets sitting on the velvet, red cushion.

Nao's eyes widened at the marvel of the jewels. The carved bracelets were rich and heavy of gold, one adorning a ruby stone, the other an emerald one. Nao blinked in disbelief; these bracelets must have been the legendary pair of the Fujino family. It was said that the bracelets were given by a Chinese empress to a Fujino samurai, a token of their eternal love when they finally parted. The pair of bracelets were believed to pass down from generation to generation for at least two hundred years now. Nao just couldn't believe that the tale was real, and that Shizuru had the bracelets in possession. Did Shizuru prepare it for someone? For a princess? Certainly, a princess like her deserved nothing less, if not more.

Nao held the emerald bracelet up, studying every detail carved on it. She was drawn to this particular one, its color soothing her mind in this feverish night. She then gritted her teeth upon a realization. 'Eiji' was supposed to give her the bracelet when they married. They both were supposed to hold the bracelets until they gave them away to their firstborn son. But it wasn't going to happen now, was it? Shizuru had just rejected her like no one else had.

_So this means nothing._

Nao put the bracelet on her left wrist. She slowly turned her wrist, scrutinizing as light reflected upon the gem. It was just another jewel—another treasure, wasn't it? The myth concerning the pair of bracelets was just a story created to heighten their importance. Nothing more. Nothing was real in this world.

Then, her breath caught in her throat. Her arm stiffened as she admired the gem's haunting beauty, enraptured by it. She just couldn't take her eyes away from it.

_It is mine._


	22. C22: A Thousand Year Promise

**Chapter 22: A Thousand Year Promise**

* * *

><p>Fujino Eiji was everything a girl of the Capital could ever dream of. Handsome. Wealthy. A powerful family. He could have anyone—anything he wanted. It seemed that he was born to be a victor, and even a prince would be envious of him. At least, at the very young age, he believed it. And, then, one day everything was turned upside down. His freedom was snatched away from him along with his lovers and friends. His laughter and his future, all the things he could ever possibly feel inside were ruthlessly taken away. Now he was no longer a prince's foe, but an abandoned victim. In time, he was forgotten by all those who had ever loved him. If this was karma's doing, whatever he had done wrong in his past lives, he hoped that his collectors would take all he must pay in this lifetime. He could not endure this pain burning inside anymore.<p>

In the early, morning hour, Eiji sat alone in the vast, empty hall of Fuuka Mansion. It was supposed to be their family's vacation mansion, but he felt it a prison instead. He was detained here, while his sister was gone to live the life that used to be his. His servants served him but hardly talked to him. His father never sent him a word. His mother was too ill to pay him a visit. It felt as though that an invisible, tall fortress was built around him. He was confined here without knowing why—without knowing for how long this torture would carry on. His sister had stopped talking to him for years now, and he wasn't sure if he actually wanted to talk to her. The only thing alive that had recently come across his path was the stranger named, 'Natsuki', but now the woman was gone as well. He was left alone with no one. No future. No hope.

Pain contorted his beautiful face as he clutched the piece of paper in his right fist. He trembled in rage, his gaze burning in hate. His mother had just written him for the first time in months, informing him of Keiko's death, and that his sister was badly injured, but was still alive. His jaws clamped shut, he stared ahead into nothingness.

_It's all because of you, Shizuru._

* * *

><p>Night sky had just begun to lighten up, lending soft, blue light into the rooms and hallways of the mansion. Standing in the middle of her bedroom, Shizuru was dressed in several layers of clothes, a creamy-colored, long scarf wrapping around her shoulders. Her wild tresses swayed with the cold wind that breezed through the opened shoji doors to the garden side. Her face appeared paler, her gaze duller than yesterday. Her head felt heavy, and her body inwardly screamed in pain. Every second conscious for her had become too much to bear. If her body now wouldn't do so much as to move a finger, she still managed to lift her gaze up. She looked out at the two, dead bodies being hauled away from the yard right outside her room. Someone had sneaked into the mansion last night, killing the guards in front of her room. Had she not spent the night in the room next to her mother's (at Yumi's adamant request), she wasn't sure what might have happened to her. Were they the same people, who ordered her assassination at the shrine? If so, they had proven to be persistent, and last night's murders only meant that they would stop at nothing.<p>

"I am sorry that I had to trouble you, Shizuru-sama, but this is a very serious matter," Midori said, standing behind her master with a worried look on her face.

"You did the right thing. Of course, I… I have to be here…" Shizuru grimaced, whilst trying to stay on her feet. Her father was in no state to lead at the moment. Her mother was too ill to look after all matters in the mansion, where the woman never considered her own home. As dire as it had been, it left only Shizuru to be in charge now.

"Those two boys were Kiyoshi's trainees, but they were too young and inexperienced. Fortunately, I had more guards following you to Yumi-sama's room." Midori's expression darkened. "This is unacceptable. They sneaked into the mansion and killed our people. They are very determined to see you dead, but we must get them first!"

Shizuru began to wheeze as her vision blurred. The longer she remained standing, the pain on her wounds intensified, and she could feel her fever worsened each moment past. "How… how are you going to find out who they are?"

"I already had my connections looking into it. Something might come up soon." Midori firmly nodded. "If it's the Takeda family, I will not hesitate to slay his son. It's evitable."

Shizuru looked at her loyal servant, calmly noting the determination in Midori's eyes. She was grateful for Midori's assurance as she felt at her most vulnerable state at the moment. She was shaken, but she couldn't tell if it was pain or fear that caused it. She didn't want to die, not when she still hadn't the chance to live her own life.

_My life. My desires._ But Shizuru remembered well what her desires had made her do in the past. What had happened was buried deep in her heart, and the memory still haunted her whenever she wasn't careful. If this was karma's doing, perhaps, she was paying for it now with her life.

Shizuru's mind slowly drifted away from the dire memories as the weight of the object in her hand began to register in her mind. She lifted the wooden box up and opened it. How negligent she had been? She had never imagined that things would escalate to this. It was threatening enough that the mansion was intruded, guards killed, but the family's emerald bracelet was stolen last night, and this matter was even more crucial than her own life. She had failed her family, and the fact destroyed her completely. All her life, she had been only a masquerade of her brother—a substitute in need. No one remembered Fujino Shizuru. No one gave a damn. And, now she lost the bracelet. This was to be the end of her.

Midori frowned at the precious treasure in her master's hand. "Why did they not take both? Why did they leave the ruby one? I do not understand. What is the meaning of this?"

Shizuru looked at her servant. Many thoughts roamed through her mind, merciless and awful. She began to breathe heavily, and Midori held her arms. "My… my peace… has been murdered…" Muttering, she looked away in guilt and shame. Her knees were going weak, and she was very much relying on Midori's strong grasps to stay upright. Tears welled up her eyes, but she felt hollowed inside. "You must… must have a new pair made. No one must know… Make… make it fast," she breathed.

Midori firmly nodded.

* * *

><p>It had been three days since Shizuru was moved to the room next to her mother's, and Natsuki hadn't been able to see the girl at all. She was no longer allowed to enter the north wing without any explanations from Midori. But, Natsuki wasn't surprised all that much. Midori never liked her. Yumi wasn't very friendly towards her either. The sick woman just stared at her while she took care of her daughter, never saying much to her. But, she couldn't care less what they thought of her. The only thing she worried about was how Shizuru was doing, or if she was still alive. If Shizuru had gotten better, the girl would surely have sent for her, but there had been no words at all.<p>

"It's been three days. I have a very bad feeling about this." Natsuki clutched the sides of her head with both hands. She was sitting in the backyard of Shou's home. She had sneaked out of the mansion this morning in a desperate attempt to seek help. It helped that Midori was nowhere to be seen, and the maids let Natsuki go about freely in the south wing as if she was one of them.

Mai paced around, one hand at her chin. "Well, from how you described Eiji-sama's wounds, I fear for the worst, too. Most… most people with wounds like that never made it." The busty girl sighed as she came to sit down next to her friend. They both were now sitting on flipped buckets, staring out into the distance as their minds raced to find some solution.

Natsuki straightened up a bit as she wiped her face tiredly. "I—I can't let him die, Mai. It wasn't his fault at all. They were aiming for the wrong person. He was a victim to all of this. He didn't deserve this."

Mai's face scrunched up in concern, patting Natsuki's drooped shoulder. Then, her brows raised in a beat. "Natsuki."

Natsuki turned to her friend. "Yeah?"

A flash of hope came across Mai's face. "Do you believe in magic?"

"No."

Mai halted for a second before turning away, blowing out a breath. "Oh, well."

Natsuki then frowned at the suggestion. Desperate time called for desperate measure. Shouldn't she try every possible way to save Shizuru? Magic or science, she shouldn't care as long as it works. "You really think magic could heal him? What kind of magic?"

"Have you ever heard of Izumo shrine?" Mai asked excitedly. Natsuki didn't even have to shake her head, and her friend continued. "They say that there is a mysterious shrine in the deep wood northwest of the capital. Only selected ones have found it. And, once you found it, they would grant you wishes. They say that it is sacred—that the wishes come true."

"Selected ones? What about you?" Natsuki raised her slender brow.

There was a moment of silence before Mai nodded. "Once."

"Really? What did you pray for?"

"My brother." Mai offered her a jaded smile. "I wished for his good health, but I cowered at the last second. I couldn't go through with it, and my brother is still ill… very ill. He won't live very long, I know."

"What stopped you?" But Mai only offered a silent answer. Natsuki compressed her lips. There had been no proven evidence if the shrine was really sacred, but she couldn't lose anything from trying. "Take me there, Mai. I need to go there."

* * *

><p>Sweat soaking her back, forming a large circle on the back of her soiled yukata. Natsuki inwardly grumbled. Even though it was a cold day, but the long, uphill trek into the woods and the strong sun weren't helping.<p>

"How much farther, Mai?" Natsuki wiped the beads of sweat from her face. Her legs were sore, her knees hurt. It was probably the exhaustion from the lack of sleep for several days in a row. Even if she didn't have to take care of Shizuru anymore, she had become even more restless and found it hard to get any decent sleep. It agonized Natsuki that all she could think about was Shizuru, while knowing that she could do nothing to help her.

Mai, who was trekking several feet in front of her, turned and smiled. "We are almost there, Natsuki-chan!"

"Yeah, but you said that two hours ago." Natsuki glanced up at the sky. Judging from how strong the sun was, noon was near. The thought of the rice balls Mai had packed into a bento this morning came into her mind. Anything Mai cooked was good, and she was terribly hungry now. She brushed more sweat from her face with the back of her hand and sighed. Oh, how she missed her nap during afternoon classes. If only she knew how her life would change—if only, but, then, she wouldn't know what to do to alter the course of journey anyway. Denying her father the flight back to Japan? Not chasing Midori into the woods, and refusing to be thrown off the cliff?

_Hell, maybe I'm already dead, and this is a long, fucked-up, guilt trip I have to go through before reaching hell—_

"Natsuki!"

Her thought ceased at the shout of her name. Natsuki idly looked up, but her eyes widened at the sight before her. "Wha—whoa…"

In the middle of the thick, deep-green forest, the red pillars had appeared out of nowhere. Behind the gate was a narrow, long, stony staircase leading up to the shrine. Natsuki wasn't sure if it was her lack of attention, but she was rather certain that she hadn't spotted such a building prior. Its roofs, walls and columns were all painted in absolute black, the shade so dark that their rough, textured skin offered strong speculum against sunlight. The shrine looked eerie in all its beauty and mystery, but what struck Natsuki even more was that she felt as if she had been here before. Bits and pieces of memories flashed before her eyes, arresting her like a strike of lightning. In the back of her mind, she could still feel the touch of the black skin of those walls, its dampness and roughness against her fingertips. Every step she took along those stony path around the shrine. She recalled breathing in the smell of earth as it rained that day.

_That day…? When…? _Natsuki closed her eyes, her mind racing to find more clues, fearing that all the visions might have disappeared. _It was raining. Yes, it was—_ Natsuki felt the harsh gust of wind hitting her body, and her eyes snapped open. Thick, gray clouds had suddenly moved in, casting murky shadows everywhere.

Mai ran towards the red gate. "It's going to rain! Natsuki-chan! Hurry!"

Under the downpour, Natsuki followed, hands over her head. She came to stop in front of the gate, hiding under the roof of thick leaves of the gigantic tree. Soaked, strands of her raven hair stuck to the side of her cheeks. "Great," she grumbled, brushing the wet drops from her sleeves, "I thought it's supposed to be winter already." But, she looked up again to see that she was alone. She turned around, looking for a sign of Mai. Oddly, a blanket of fog began to form and surrounded her, clouding her sight. "Mai… Mai…!" she called out, but her voice must have been deafened by the heavy rain. "Mai, where are you—" Her voice trailed off as a thought hit her.

_Be prepared, Natsuki. Strange things happen when one visits Izumo… If one finds it at all._

Fear struck her as she recalled Mai's warning. What had just happened? Where did her friend go? But, Natsuki was finally here, and she wasn't going to back down now. _So this… this is one of the tricks this world is playing me, right? _She rubbed her arms a bit, glancing left and right in paranoia. _Urgh, to hell with it!_ Her fists clenched, she turned towards the gate, meaning to get to the shrine by herself. But she took a quick step back at the sudden swing of a black umbrella in front of her. Under the downpour, she hadn't seen where it had come from. Frowning in confusion, Natsuki wiped the wet strands of hair from her eyes.

The umbrella was lifted, revealing a man in his late seventies. His back was slightly hunched, his skin wrinkled and rough. His long, gray hair was pulled up into a topknot, tied by a gray thread. His black kimono appeared neat and absolutely dry under the umbrella he was holding. The mark of a cross-shaped scar under his left eye gave him a unique look somehow. But, what caught her attention was the samurai sword in the scabbard attached to his side. He was definitely too old to be fighting anyone, but she wasn't going to make a point out of it.

Natsuki took a deep breath in. "Hi, I'm here to see—uh—the master—the shrine keeper."

He studied her for a moment, and then spoke. "What do you need? What do you wish for?"

However soft his voice was, Natsuki could still hear him clearly in the midst of downpour. It was as though he was in another plane of existence altogether, and she was standing at the gate of the cryptic land. It lent her the eerie feeling that once entered, there would be no return.

Clutching the hems of her sleeves, Natsuki found herself uttering the word that betrayed her belief. "Magic."

Midori didn't have to tell her. No healers had to tell her. Shizuru came back from the meeting with Nao that day, tired and pained. Her condition worsened, and it was almost everyone's common understanding that the girl would not make it. The lack of contact from Shizuru was a grave sign, and even now that Natsuki was trying to do _something_, she wasn't even sure if it was all too late. There had even been talks around the mansion about bringing Eiji back to replace his dying sister.

"I need magic," Natsuki muttered, her voice rasped. "I need a miracle. Please, make it happen."

His expression cold, he stared at her for a long moment. To her surprise, a look of recognition subtly flashed across his eyes. It startled and made her curious at the same time. Had they met before? In this world or her world? If they had, wouldn't she have remembered those scars?

After a moment, his gaze dropped, and his wrinkled skin grew as gray as the clouds above. His jaw clamped shut, his lips quivering. As he stood with his head slightly bowed, it looked as if he was forever locked behind the cursed painting of sorrow. Without another word, he turned and headed back towards the shrine.

Natsuki staggered for a second, unsure of what to do, but eventually decided to follow him. She took it that he didn't chase her away was already a good sign. She shouted after him. "I am a humble servant of Fujino family. I came—"

"I know who you are, Kuga Natsuki," he said, but didn't look back at her. "I have never forgotten you even for a day. The exotic color of your eyes. Your strange accent, how sweet it sounded… Your lips…"

Natsuki halted in her tracks, hands clutched at her chest. She stared at his back intently, suspicious of his next move. If her journey to this world had taught her anything, she had learned to expect the unexpected. But, the way he described _the_ Natsuki he once knew spooked her a bit.

In thundering silence of the heavy rain, he reached the shrine and walked up to the wooden stairs. He put the umbrella away and calmly waved for her to come stand under the roof.

Natsuki hesitated. But, she knew what she came for, and she wasn't going to back out until she gets it. She moved closer, cautious to keep some distance from him. Involuntarily, she began to shiver in the cold wind as her soaked clothes were beginning to take effect on her body. "W—who are you? How did you know me?"

He offered a silent answer, and simply gestured for her to move further into the shrine.

Reluctantly, Natsuki did accordingly. He might be a little spooky, but she had gotten the harmless aura radiating from him. Besides, she wasn't all too worried to fight a seventy years old man, if she had to. She entered the shrine, noting the rows of windows along both sides of the hall, allowing some light into the dark chamber. There were tables and shelves with several wooden boxes of many sizes. There were closed jars of red and black color; they were in several different sizes as well. Only a few jars were gold painted. Mixed in the bunch were dolls made of hair, wax, and wood. All were dusty and old. It seemed that people had visited the shrine and left those items here.

"Time is the cruelest thing, isn't it?"

Natsuki could hear the old man's whisper in the midst of the rain. It was so loud and clear against the heavy downpour. She looked over her shoulder, but he had already disappeared. At his absence, she turned around in fright. Her eyes were wide as her gaze frantically searched the place.

_Okay. Calm your ass down. This place is—is just a shrine. Breathe. Breathe—_

"Ahhh!" Natsuki yelped as she turned again to see a figure sitting just a few feet in front of her.

The stranger occupied a spot in the middle of the hall. In his black garb, he looked several years older than the scar-faced man, who had just disappeared. His eyes narrowed, he sported a gray, long beard, his head bald.

_A monk… Where did he come from?_

"You pray for magic?"

Natsuki stared at him, frowning. She could hear his voice echoing around, while his lips weren't even moving. The hair on her neck and arms stood even though she tried to tell herself that it was what she had expected. She briefly glanced over her shoulder to the gate down the stony path, where she had just come from. The monk couldn't have possibly heard what she said by the gate. It was too far away. _Magic. Oh, yeah, probably._

She turned to face him again. "A… a friend of mine is dying. I have to—I need to stop it. I don't want her to die. Can… can you help her?" Natsuki found her voice shaken. She then realized how frightened she truly was, not by his ghostly presence but Shizuru's imminent death. Not many things in the world could have scared her this much, and it puzzled Natsuki that a life of someone she had met not long ago could have such a deep impact upon her.

A moment passed before the monk spoke again. "Such is life. A soul forever lives on, because we cannot let go. We cannot move on… until the end of time…"

Her face growing cold, Natsuki shook her head, brushing the wet drops from her hair. "Right, I'm not here to let go. I need something done. Something impossible. I only came here because my friend told me that this was the place. I need some magic. Please. I'll do anything."

The monk studied her for the longest of time, and heavy silence fell upon her. It could be his gaze. It could be that sorrow and pity in his eyes. She wasn't sure what it was, but it was clenching at her heart. It weighed upon her, so much so that she felt like drowning in a deep, dark water. It was begging her to leave, to breathe—to be freed once again.

"You are determined as ever," The monk said quietly, and then sighed, "A life will be exchanged for another. Bring me an item belong to each of them, and it shall be done."

Natsuki's lips parted, mystified. "A… a life exchanged for another?" The question rang menacingly in her mind, and she began to understand why Mai backed out from saving her brother.

The monk closed his eyes. "You will know what to do, because you have made those choices before."

Natsuki stood still, her blood running cold as she stared down at the hard floor. A vicious cycle. It was a full, vicious cycle. _I have made those choices before. I have— _Natsuki bit her bottom lip as the words sank in. At last, there came the confirmation she had sought; there had been a 'Natsuki Kruger', not just an old writer in the haunted cabin with the same name, but it was really _her_.

* * *

><p>"… tsuki… Natsuki…! Where have you been!? I've been looking all over the place for you!"<p>

Blinking a few times, Natsuki turned to see Mai, confused. She was pretty sure that she had been inside the shrine only a moment ago, but now found herself back in the deep forest. Mai was approaching her in a rush, a concerned look on her face. "M—Mai, I—"

"Don't do this again! You scared me. I thought you were lost," Mai chided. She stopped next to her friend, taking a few deep breaths in after what seemed to be a long run.

"I'm sorry. I was just… I went inside—" Natsuki's voice trailed off as she looked up at the gray sky, trying to recall every details of what had just happened in the shrine.

_If you want it badly enough…Only if._

* * *

><p>That night, Natsuki fidgeted in her room in the south wing, waiting for the maids to turn in.<p>

For hours on end, she sat and scrutinized the two, cut pieces of clothes in her hands. The blue piece was in her right hand, while a gray piece was in her left. She stared down at the two lives in her grasps, unsure of what to think or feel. She was about to break all her rules, integrities and beliefs. She wasn't sure if it would work, or if she would not regret it later.

_He said that I've done it before—that I've chosen this path._

If the monk and the weird, scarred samurai weren't lying, 'Natsuki Kruger' or 'Kuga Natsuki' had been here before, and it seemed that it wasn't her first or second time here either. The idea frightened her to the core. If the cycle had been repeating forever, what must she do to stop it? Should she not deliver the two articles now? Natsuki grimaced. The strange events at the shrine was one thing, but what force so strong and luring that had ceaselessly called for her to this world? Many more questions arose, but no answers surfaced. Natsuki had to tell herself to focus on the task at hand tonight. There had been no words from Shizuru still, and she knew that time was running out. Every minute counted. She could not fail.

When midnight came, Natsuki readied herself and slipped out of the mansion rather with ease. The security was high on the north and west wing in particular, light in the south wing where the maids were. She was cladded in black, a black scarf wrapped around her whole head, leaving some space for the eyes to see. She climbed over the wall of the mansion and softly landed on the quiet road on the other side.

Glancing around, Natsuki was relieved that the road was empty at this time of night. She recalled again of the routes to the shrine earlier today. However, fears and uncertainties suddenly struck her, chaining her legs to the spot. Since when she had tried to play God? Would it even be possible, and at what price she must pay? This was not a kill in a convoy attack, where it could be argued as a forced action, or self-defense. It was carefully schemed, reflected. It was about to give Natsuki a whole new meaning of 'murder' in her book, and she knew that things would never be the same again after tonight.

_Are you ready, Natsuki…?_ Natsuki became still, her gaze absentmindedly fixing along the deserted road. She was alone in this. She was suddenly scared. Would her father ever approve of this? Would he still see her as his and love her? _Of course not— _All of a sudden, her train of thoughts was interrupted by the harsh pull at her arm. Turning sharply, she pulled out a dagger from the scabbard affixed to her belt, aiming right at the intruder's chest. But her armed wrist was stopped by a fast grip, stopping her attack in midair.

"It's me!"

At the familiar voice, Natsuki looked up, and was startled to see Midori.

Midori pushed Natsuki away. "What's that, Krurujer!? Are you trying to kill me!?"

Natsuki quickly looked around and raised finger up at Midori's face. "Shhhh! Be quiet!"

"What are you doing here in the middle of the night?" Midori glared at her and the dagger. Her face, then, reddened in anger, and she clenched her fists. "Another ambush? Shizuru-sama is dying, and stealing more cargos is all you think about!?"

Natsuki froze at the woman's slip, and Midori halted, realizing what she had just let out. For a long moment, the two stood in silence, both looking away from each other.

"Is… is there any hopes?" Natsuki started again.

It took Midori a minute before she looked up again. She stared straight at Natsuki as a tear rolled down her cheek. "No." Her response was short and cold.

Natsuki should have expected it, but hearing it straight from Midori's mouth was too much to bear. Her body inwardly writhed in pain as reality sank in. She wanted to walk away, but her legs failed to move. She wanted to throw up, but struggled to force it all away, brushing all her emotions aside.

"They give her two more days. The funeral will be held on Fuuka Island under her real name. We already sent words to them to prepare a quiet ceremony—"

Natsuki shakily breathed. "I—I have to go." She turned away, unable to hear it anymore. But Midori grabbed her arm and pulled her around to face her.

Midori paused, stunned to see Natsuki's tears up close now. "K—Krurujer…" Her tone was quieter, and her grip on Natsuki softened. They stood in the shameless awkwardness around them, and she finally let out a quiet sigh. "When it's all over, what are you going to do next? Do you still have a family? Will you go to the Protectors?"

"No… well, I don't know…" Natsuki kept staring at her feet. Frustrations warred within her. Where she might end up after this was the last thing on her mind right now as all she could think of was how to save Shizuru. "I—I don't know anything—I—I gotta go." Natsuki walked off fast.

"Wait! Where are you going?" Midori trailed after her in curiosity.

"Izumo shrine." Natsuki picked up her pace, while glancing around with precaution.

"_Izumo_," Midori echoed. "Ah, Izumo! I've heard of it!"

Natsuki frowned. "Keep your voice down, will ya?"

"Isn't it the haunted shrine in the woods? Yes, that's what the villagers say… Oh, no, don't go there! The spirits will not let you come back!"

Natsuki groaned in annoyance. "I don't care. I'm stuck here with no way back anyway, so if I got stuck in that creepy shrine, too, it wouldn't matter. If you're afraid, then stop following me. You'll only slow me down."

Midori's steps did falter. The woman glanced around as Natsuki ran further down the road. One would have shudder, or even walk away as soon as Izumo shrine was mentioned in any conversation. Fears amongst the villagers were apparent. Stories and myths of the angry and sad spirits around the shrine had been told for centuries, but what had made the shrine so famous was its sacredness. One would get their wish, if they asked for it, but at a price unimaginable. The price that one must pay for eternity.

Midori watched the black-clad figure running away. To her amazement, Natsuki didn't seem to be afraid at all. The look of determination in the green eyes only made Midori more curious of what was the foreigner was trying to achieve. Then, she started to run after Natsuki, waving her hands. "Wait, Krurujer! Wait for me!"

* * *

><p>"Don't push." Natsuki grew annoyed as the woman, who usually loved to bark at her with a passion, now walked so close to her that they were tripping each other. "Just go—urgh, Midori! For the last time!"<p>

Midori took a small step away, but kept close distance to Natsuki. Her face appeared pale and stoic. Her arms stiffened by her sides. The woman hadn't spoken at all in the last two hours that they had trekked uphill. They were deep into the forest now.

"You're creeping me out, Midori. Just go back if you're so scared." Natsuki shook her head.

"They say that not everyone will find Izumo. It's like a shrine in your dreams. Or your nightmares."

Ignoring Midori, Natsuki began to feel uneasy. She was certain that she had come along the same routes she did earlier today. But it began to frustrate her that the shrine was nowhere to be seen. After hours of trekking, her body shivered with cold, her teeth chattering. Her legs were sore, and she was thirsty. What happened? Had her resolution faltered? Was she afraid to sacrifice to save Shizuru?

Natsuki paused for a moment, her shoulders dropped in exhaustion. Yes, she was afraid. At the simple notion, her heart sank deeper, her body frailer. She hesitated to murder. She didn't want to live with the guilt afterwards. But, she also didn't want Shizuru to die. Was she following Mai's path, denying the miracle to save their loved one? But, Shizuru had not another months or years like Mai's sick brother had. Shizuru's time was running out. It was now or never.

_Only… only if you wish so desperately to find it… Find me. Call for me…_ Her head bowed, Natsuki closed her eyes. She clamped her jaw shut, but she could still hear her own voice whispering. It had happened before. She had said those words long ago.

In the eternal silence, countless stars upon the sky fought to shine against one another. The air became a little clearer as wind swept through the area, chasing away the cold. Natsuki felt a hand on her shoulder, and she looked up to see the shrine appeared in front of her once again.

Her hand gripping hard on Natsuki's shoulder, Midori had completely frozen. Her eyes were wide in bewilderment. "Iz…Izumo…"

* * *

><p>A lone candle was lit inside the hall of the shrine. The monk had been waiting for her arrival. His expression neutral, his body remained as lifeless as a statue. His skin appeared colorless, bleeding out sharp contrast against his black clothes. His eyes were black. So black that she could not see the white in them. Or, was it so dark that she couldn't see anyone—anything clearly anymore.<p>

Natsuki took in a deep breath before she sat down in front of him, and presented him the two pieces of clothes. The moment she laid the items down on the wooden floor, sharp gust of wind pushed the rows of windows on both sides of the hall open. The wind screamed as the windows flapped against their frames.

Wide-eyed, Midori was sitting down on her heels behind Natsuki, clutching the hem of Natsuki's sleeve.

"There is no turning back," the monk said.

"You said that I've done this before," Natsuki said through her gritted teeth, "When?"

The monk remained absolutely still for a moment. "There is no such thing as miracles, Kuga Natsuki. You are here now, as you had again and again in the past, because you are paying for the curse you are about to cast upon other. It does not matter when it has started, but there will be no stopping if you do not break away from it. Here is your chance."

Natsuki froze at his words, and he could clearly see fears in her eyes.

He gestured once more at the two items on the floor. "Do you forgive? Will you let go?"

Her mind was telling her to back down, but her heart screamed otherwise. Emerald eyes flickered between the monk and the cut piece of blue scarf. She remembered how warm it was when Shizuru wrapped the scarf around her. She remembered the girl's smile—so warm and gentle a smile that it had become the only light in this strange world she was thrown in. And, even if what the monk said was true, that she would be drowned in this vicious cycle for another thousand years, she couldn't think of anything else. All she wanted was to see Shizuru again.

_Do not forgive. Do not forget… forget… forget…_

As if he had heard her unspoken words—or if he had known before of her decision, the monk reached out and picked up the gray cloth from the floor. The moment he drew a breath from the fabric, the candlelight was snapped out by a fierce wind. The whole hall turned absolutely black.

* * *

><p>Blackness faded. Natsuki was trudging ahead into the curtain of thick fog. It felt as though an unknown force had just sucked out all energy from her body. Her mind cleared a little as she found herself walking down the hill. As she moved through the dark forest, the soft whisper of night wind became a little more distinct in her ears. As if she had just emerged from a stunned shell, she could now feel the cool haze against her skin. Her legs kept moving, and she started to register what was happening around her. Recognizing the route, she realized that she was heading southeast, the direction back to the capital—to where Shizuru was, where her price was.<p>

Natsuki eventually slowed down, wrapping her arms around herself. Her energy was running out, and she needed a rest so badly. It must have been near dawn by now. Her exhausted legs couldn't seem to hold out any longer. She tried to stay on her feet, but tumbled forwards by a force plunged at her back.

Both Natsuki and Midori yelped as they gracelessly fell to the ground. Grumbling in pain, they sat up, panting for air. It seemed that Natsuki wasn't the only one exhausted from the trek. They had no idea how long they had been walking. They had not been talking since that candlelight in the shrine was put out. They weren't sure of what they saw, or if they should believe it, if Izumo was only their disturbing imagination.

"S—sorry. I'm a little tired." Midori rubbed her face with a shaky hand. She had been in a trancelike state as well, walking blindly into Natsuki, and causing them to fall. She lifted her face up and frowned to see that her hands were slightly shaking. Then, she lowered her hands, resting them on her folded knees. "What was it, Krurujer? What were those things you brought him?"

Natsuki leaned back against the nearest tree, allowing herself a few moments to catch a breath. "He told me to bring two items that represent two lives… to exchange them…"

Midori paused for a second before she looked down at her own attire. She raised her arms, scrutinizing her sleeves.

Natsuki rolled her eyes. "Too bad. I didn't pick you."

Midori bit her bottom lip, killing the smile on her face. "I know that the blue one was Shizuru-sama's scarf, but what about the gray one?"

There was a moment before Natsuki looked away. "I don't even know if this will work, if the shrine is real."

"Of course, it is real. We have just been there! Oh, I can't believe I have just been to Izumo shrine, and back! I am alive!" Midori pondered aloud.

Natsuki shook her head. Pushing herself up to her feet, she brushed the dirt off her clothes and started walking downhill again. "Let's go. I'm freakin' exhausted. I need some sleep."

Midori quickly got up and followed. "But… whose garment was it?"

"Masaru's." Natsuki rubbed her eyes with one hand, trudging down the hill. "It was difficult to sneak into the north wing, so I got one of his worn kimono from the maids. They were about to wash his clothes—" She was suddenly cut short by a pair of hands grabbing her collar, throwing her down the hill. Yelping, Natsuki only came to a stop when she hit the tree below. She winced in pain as she shakily got up to her knees, putting her left hand over her right shoulder, where she had just hit the tree trunk.

"You killed Masaru-sama!? How could you? He sheltered you and fed you! He was Shizuru-sama's father!"

Natsuki had not a second to respond when Midori lunged at her again. She was shoved to the ground, choking as Midori straddled her, strangling her with both hands. "G—get… off… get off…" Natsuki gathered her last strength and jabbed her hand at Midori's throat, causing the woman to fall back. Panting, she crawled up on all fours, scooting away from the woman.

Midori was moving on her knees, clutching her own neck as she coughed furiously. Even before the woman regained her full strength, she limply jumped at Natsuki, growling in rage. She grabbed Natsuki by the collar, while swinging her other free arm back. "Murderer!"

Natsuki blocked the blow with her left arm, and kicked at Midori's stomach, driving the woman away. Wheezing, she swayed on her feet, her fists clenched so hard that she was hurting herself. "No, he was! He destroyed everyone's lives! He deserved this!"

"Shizuru-sama will never forgive you!"

"I don't care! She's dying, and it's all because of him! If I have to, I'll do it again!"

Then, silence filled the air, and the wind had never felt colder than it was now. Natsuki was breathless as she listened to herself. She staggered as her own words kept echoing in her head, breath caught in her throat. For some reason, her retort succeeded to stop Midori as well. A heavy silence hang over them.

"Fool, you are." Midori breathed heavily as she took a few wobbly steps to lean against a tree for support. "But… aren't we all?" Scoffing, she looked away as harsh tears rolled down her cheeks.

When Midori seemed to calm down and posted no further threat to her, Natsuki allowed herself to relax. She rubbed her right shoulder again to ease the pain around the throbbing area. Perhaps, it would be better if she took a bit of time to rest here. She didn't trust her legs to function and walk herself back to the mansion in this state. Midori didn't look all too well either, and Natsuki could just imagine how sleepless the woman must have been, trying to watch over the mansion and Shizuru at the same time.

Then, it came as quietly as an intruder in the night. It gripped her when she least expected it. It threatened her, so ruthlessly suffocating and tearing her apart. In the dark, emerald eyes had wearily gazed around, but caught onto an object glittering on the ground. The golden curve of a metal had partially slipped out through the loose opening of a silky, black pouch. One would have missed it in the darkness around them, if not for the lone jewel adorning it. It looked like a drop of blood, if one was not careful. The moment the crimson gem reflected light, time stopped.

Natsuki stood unmoving for the longest time, faintly registering her own movement as her left hand slid down from her right shoulder. Her arms now stoic by her sides, she wasn't sure if she was still breathing. She wasn't blinking. She couldn't hear anything, and she couldn't feel the wind around her anymore. Everything was voided. The world had stopped turning as the ruby gem stared back at her. In the darkest hour of night, it shone brightly into her heart, embracing her and promising never to let go.

_Forever._

Her hand shaky, Natsuki slowly knelt down, fearing if her knees would break, or if the bracelet would just magically disappear. Holding back her breath, she delicately traced her fingertips along the object, feeling the coolness of the golden surface. A restrained gasp of pleasure escaped her dry throat as it felt overwhelmingly familiar. It had reached in, touched and caressed her bleeding soul.

_It… it's here… The missing bracelet…_

Natsuki had not the mind to wonder how it had unexpectedly appeared before her. She had no idea where the sudden torment surged from. The two worlds could collide and calamities erupt, but her attention was solely on the bracelet. As Natsuki mustered all her strength to lift the bracelet up off the ground, she felt her heart clenched in an indescribable pain. The agony she knew it was there, but couldn't pinpoint where. The past and present weighed down on her shoulders—the lives she once lived and the souls she had long lost. A thousand years apart, emerald eyes gazed into the ruby gem as if to speak to it, to call out for it—to whisper all the things that had been caged inside. But, no words could release, or be released.

_I will cross the plane of time, every star to find you… Wait for me._

Hot tears shot to her eyes, streaming down her beautiful face. Natsuki lied down on her side and curled up into a ball. Her body trembling, she clutched the bracelet against her chest as she sobbed uncontrollably. All she saw was blood pouring out of the stone, drowning her to the bottomless pit of pain. The only words ringing in her mind was the unfulfilled promise—her own promise.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** First off, I must apologize for the long delay. Life got me for the first half of 2014. Also, some new fanarts for 'Legend' or 'Until' (not sure if I mentioned this before), you can follow the links from my profile. Many thanks to all the artists! :D

From reading the reviews, I think I need to clear things up a bit. Nao stole emerald bracelet in last chapter, the one she owned in the present world. Here, Natsuki found the missing, ruby bracelet. All faults lied with me as my updates were few and far in between. I apologize again.

Until next time.


	23. C23: Surrender

**A/N: **_Thanks, guys. _

_I'll update my profile often for the current progress of my stories (just in case you happened to wonder)._

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><p><strong>Chapter 23: Surrender<strong>

* * *

><p>Against the rays of sunlight shining down through the narrow gap between the sections of the roofing, Midori was holding up the counterfeit, ruby bracelet, scrutinizing the adorning gem. Then, for a long moment, she compared it with the authentic one she had brought with her.<p>

"This is most remarkable, Tamura-sama. Most sublime work I have ever seen." Midori was in absolute awe. She studied every details on the fake bracelet, which copied from the original to perfection. She sighed with satisfaction.

It had been only two weeks since Midori had come to the famous craftsman for help, and he had produced such a stunning work. Surely, the cost would be heavy, but Shizuru had granted Midori a large sum for this particular errand. It was only their luck that Yumi hadn't asked for the bracelets from Shizuru; the woman must have been stricken by her daughter's near death experience, the corpse in her husband's room, the nasty rumors among the aristocrats, and the chaos in the Fujino household that was growing each day past since the masters of the house were not available.

Midori carefully placed the counterfeit pair of bracelets into the original box she had brought with her. Then, she put the genuine, ruby bracelet into the silky, black pouch. She patted the pouch a little as it was now kept safe in her inner pocket. A long, heavy sigh escaped her lips as she recalled the night that she had almost lost the ruby bracelet in the forest. During her trek in the deep woods after leaving Izumo shrine, she had accidentally dropped the pouch during her pushes and shoves with Natsuki. If it hadn't been Natsuki who founded it, whilst the woman was lying on the ground, Midori would have lost it to the darkness forever.

At the dire thought, she patted the treasure in her pocket again. After losing the emerald one, she couldn't quite imagine the state her master would be in if the ruby one had gone missing as well. But, what struck Midori was those angry, pained tears on Natsuki's face as the woman held onto the ruby bracelet as if her life depended on it.

_She was crying…_ Midori remembered the state of grief Natsuki had been that night. Seeing Natsuki suddenly curling up on the ground, clutching the bracelet to her chest, Midori had been frightened, or scared even, thinking that the woman had been possessed. She hadn't dared asking Natsuki for the reason since then.

Midori wouldn't believe that Shizuru had shown the family treasure to Natsuki, a complete stranger to them only two months ago. However, Midori wasn't going to rule out any assumptions concerning Natsuki now. Odd occurrences kept happening since the appearance of the foreigner. But, the oddest occurrence of all, in Midori's humble opinion anyway, was her master's willingness to tolerate, and even embrace, Natsuki's presence.

_Are they in love? _She grumbled at the question that had been gnawing at her for quite some time now.

* * *

><p>Midori handsomely rewarded Tamura for his splendid work, and headed back to Fujino mansion.<p>

All the while, many thoughts clouded her mind. It was no denying that her master was attracted to the foreigner, against all the reasons Midori could come up with. And, to make matters worse, Natsuki seemed to be equally fervent in her response. Consciously or unconsciously, the foreigner had gone out of her way to save Shizuru.

_Oh, heaven…_ Midori tiredly rubbed her face as soon as she spotted Natsuki at the wide intersection that connected all four, main passageways of the Fujino mansion.

The wind was cold, but Natsuki had been as adamant as ever. Sitting on her heels, she had been occupying the tiny spot in front of the North Wing, where she had been prohibited to enter (on Yumi's order). Every day she would come to this particular spot as if waiting for Yumi's mercy.

Midori walked up to Natsuki, staring down at her, who glared back up, unimpressed. She didn't like Natsuki, or the dangerous influence the woman had on her master. She didn't like the color of her eyes. She didn't like the woman's odd demeanors, or her strange accent. She just didn't like Natsuki at all. But, to see how Natsuki had agonized her own health just to earn a chance to see Shizuru did eventually soften Midori's stance.

"Shizuru-sama regained her consciousness three days ago and has made some extraordinary improvements on her health," Midori said. She didn't know what had gotten into her to make her say it, or perhaps her walls had slowly crumbled around Natsuki's perseverance.

There was a pause from Natsuki, and Midori considered it as 'relief'. A huge relief. "_Extraordinary_ as in holding on for two more weeks instead of dying within two days like you said she would?" Natsuki shifted in her spot. Sitting on her heels for hours must have numbed her legs. "Well, thanks for telling me that… that she's out of danger now." Her voice softened. "May I see her?"

Midori noted the paleness on Natsuki's face, and groaned in frustration. She knelt down on one knee and growled in the woman's face. "I hate you, Krurujer."

"Our feelings are mutual." Natsuki looked away.

"The funny thing is that you were the first thing Shizuru-sama asked for when she woke again. _But_ Yumi-sama didn't find it funny. Yumi-sama does not want you here. The only reason she has not kicked you out because her daughter is still alive, and would probably be furious if she woke to find you gone. But, anyway, Krurujer, give it up! What are you trying to do here? Shizuru-sama has her own life to live. She has certain obligations to fulfill, her family name to serve. You should go back to wherever you came from." Midori lowered her voice at the last words. "…To the Protectors."

"They're not my family. Not even friends. I told you that I was forced into it."

"Whatever." Midori sighed. Whoever Natsuki really was or where she came from was another matter, but what happened at Izumo shrine was something Midori couldn't ignore. It was something crucial—something much deeper than what companions would normally do for each other. "Are you in love with Shizuru-sama?"

Natsuki snapped in shock at the question, and then blushed furiously. "What are you—what are you talking about? I was just—I was worried because she's been very ill. I, well, I _am_ still worried about her, that's all."

_All right. That is a 'yes'._ Midori thought to herself.

Against all odds, it somewhat relieved Midori, making her more willing to trust Natsuki. At least, she knew now that Natsuki would not harm her master. And, she knew from her own experiences that The Protectors were not all that bad of a group of people. She knew Shou, and particularly, one of his disciples, Youko. She even thought that they had been too generous for their own good at times. One risked their life for rewards, but The Protectors seemed to nurture the idealistic side of honor and glory for far too much. It could blind them. It could get dangerous.

Midori glanced around for a bit. Yumi's room was only a few rooms away from the room Shizuru was currently occupying. There would be maids along the hallways, but there was always the garden route as an alternative.

* * *

><p>Shizuru took a few deep breaths in as she attempted to sit up. The pain was still heavy, effectively dulling her, but it seemed more bearable each day past. She had wakened for more than an hour now, refreshed and washed, and now the maids had left to retrieve her brunch.<p>

They told her that she had been unconscious for nearly two weeks after the relapse. Or, to straightforwardly put, after she was kicked by her father. Given her worsened condition, her imminent death had been expected. There had been a preparation for her funeral up on Fuuka Island even. For them, to see her waking up again had been nothing short of a miracle.

_A miracle…? I wish I knew what it is. _Shizuru bit her bottom lip as she struggled into a poised sitting position. Thankfully, she had been out cold for most of the torment; she wasn't sure if she could endure all the pain with her consciousness clear.

The doors slid open, and Megumi appeared, moving about on her knees. She was holding a tray of hot food, two maids behind her. "You did not wait for us. You are pushing yourself too hard, Shizuru-sama! Yumi-sama would be very worried. She would be, I tell you."

Shizuru offered a weak smile. "You have come just in time. I am starving."

Megumi set up the low table over Shizuru's lap, while the other maids were helping behind her back to keep her sitting up straight. It had been difficult to all of them, and Shizuru was grateful for every help she had received. Shizuru began her meal, and hummed lightly when her hunger was appeased. "The fish is really good, Megumi-san. And, the soup, too."

The old head maid smiled as she watched Shizuru eating like a mother to a child.

Out of the blue, the doors to the garden side slid opened. Shizuru looked up, knowing that Midori liked to use the passage instead of the corridors. She had been expecting some news over the progress on the counterfeit bracelets, but she was rendered speechless not by Midori's presence, but the raven-haired woman trailing behind her.

The four guards by the garden side reluctantly glanced at one another. Although Shizuru had instructed them to let Midori in, they were unsure if the order included a stranger Midori had brought as well. The guards turned as white as a sheet when Shizuru almost dropped her bowl, but steadied her hands just in time.

Megumi opened her mouth to holler, but no voice came out, while Midori ducked her head down as if to avoid the muted scold at her.

Slightly out of breath, Natsuki, however, looked disconcerted after having crawling through the bushes after Midori, some leaves on her hair.

Shizuru composed herself, and turned to Megumi. "That would be all, Megumi-san," she said softly.

"B—but Yumi-sama—" Megumi began, but Shizuru waved her off.

"Please."

The head maid grudgingly obeyed, and, with the other maids, they left through the doors to the hallway side.

Midori and Natsuki then entered, and moved to Shizuru's side. One of the guards slid the door to the garden closed behind them.

Midori beamed as she noted the food on the table. "Shizuru-sama, you're eating now. You look much, _much_ better today. The color on your cheeks is back!"

Shizuru tried her best to receive Midori's enthusiasm, but her gaze couldn't seem to leave Natsuki at all. Emerald eyes were staring back at her, and in the hazy moments that followed, she could no longer tell what Midori was saying, or what was happening around her. Through her darkest hours, she had held on tightly even to the physical pains because she needed to 'feel'. If feeling the pain meant that she was still alive, she had welcomed it. She had held on only because she wished to see Natsuki again. But, when she had wakened from the coma, Megumi had told her that Natsuki was gone. The thought of Natsuki disappearing again, or worse, returning to her own world, had frightened Shizuru, terrorizing in her restless dreams.

To see Natsuki present before her now, Shizuru didn't exactly know how to react. She clutched the hem of her blanket, her hands trembling. "…tsuki… Natsuki, you are still here."

"Of course, I haven't gone anywhere." Natsuki sounded strangely calm, yet elating all at once. A look of immense joy—the look that could have brought tears out—filled the green eyes. Carefully, Natsuki moved on her knees closer to Shizuru, and rubbed her thin shoulders. Natsuki's touch was light, gentle and reassuring in contrast of her usually rough and awkward one.

Softly chuckling, Natsuki brushed the hair from Shizuru's eyes. "Even if I did, I'd always come back to you, Shizuru."

Shizuru kept staring, still unable to believe her eyes. The idea of her mother chasing Natsuki away hadn't escaped her either. Between the relapse and the painful, waking hours, she wasn't sure which fragments of her recollections were real. Had she been dreaming? Was this just another vivid dream, Natsuki so close to her that she could feel the woman's body warmth? If so, she wouldn't want to wake from this dream at all.

"But they said—" Shizuru started, but mellowed when she felt Natsuki's lips on her temple. Her eyes blinked slowly before sliding shut in a bliss. By then, everything was fine, her world turning again. Strangely, she now felt alive for the first time in years. She had wondered for a while now how a mere stranger could have such power over her, effecting her this much. But 'Natsuki' happened.

Natsuki moved behind Shizuru, using her shoulder and chest to support Shizuru's back. Her right arm snaked around Shizuru's waist, tugging the frail girl closer to her. For some reason, Natsuki seemed to be much stronger than her womanly, slender figure had shown. At such intimate contact, Shizuru involuntarily stiffened. Natsuki seemed to notice at once and said, "You can lean back. It'll be more comfortable—"

"_Ahem!_" Midori cleared her throat. Only then both women broke from the trance they were in.

Natsuki instantly paused, while Shizuru straightened up, but was still leaning against Natsuki's shoulder. She needed the support, but managed to appear casual in her posture as not to worry Midori and Natsuki for far too much.

Shizuru raised her brows in mild amusement when she saw how red Midori's face was. She turned to glance at Natsuki, who was also blushing madly. If there was a blushing contest, she wouldn't know who would win between the two.

"Yes, Midori," Shizuru finally said, breaking the awkward silence among them.

Midori scratched the back of her head. "I—I'm glad that you seem much healthier now, Shizuru-sama."

"Thank you. I am glad, too." Shizuru smiled, and then another thought hit her. "Ara, Midori, have you gotten them? It is supposed to be due today, isn't it?"

"Err—uh, yes, I have." But Midori reluctantly glanced at Natsuki.

Shizuru noted the anxious look in her servant's eyes, but quietly nodded. Her mind was lucid. Her body was warm. Her wounds were still painful. But, there was a newfound feeling—a new sense of security that she had never felt before. With Natsuki next to her now, Shizuru felt stronger than she had ever been. "Let me see them," she said.

Midori shifted uncomfortably on her heels. "But Krurujer—"

"It is all right. From now on, there will be no secrets between Natsuki and me. She has my complete trust, and you should, too." Shizuru briefly glanced at Natsuki, but was worried if she was actually harming the woman's health; Natsuki's face was so red now, the shade rivaling an exploding volcano.

Growling, Midori glowered at the seemingly euphoric Natsuki before looking away. She carefully took out the wooden box from her sack and presented it to her master.

Shizuru placed the box on the low table. She opened the lid and studied the pair of bracelets inside. She picked up the emerald bracelet, scrutinizing it. _Very detailed. Such a marvelous work, indeed._ When she heard Natsuki's gasp, she looked up at her, a corner of her mouth lifted up.

"Aren't they beautiful?" Shizuru asked.

"Wow, are these the—_the_ pair?" Natsuki's brows came together in one harsh line. She even glanced up at Midori in suspicion. The look had Midori looked away in discomfort.

For a short moment, Shizuru studied Natsuki. Was it just a coincidence? Natsuki's tone seemed to suggest doubts, and the green gaze was untrusting.

"What do you see?" Shizuru couldn't help but wondered.

Her frown deepened, Natsuki reached out and graced her fingers along the counterfeit, emerald bracelet. "I think it's beautiful, but it doesn't tell me anything… Nm—no, nothing. I got nothing."

Shizuru was unsure what Natsuki had meant, and looked again to scrutinize the pair of fake bracelets. The details on the gold were explicitly done. The gems were clear and cut to the exact shapes. To her knowledge, the new pair looked remarkable like the ancient one, and she would be very surprised if her parents could tell that they were counterfeit.

"Tell you what?" Midori asked. "How come you knew about the Fujino bracelets? You are just a commoner."

Shizuru looked up. She, too, was surprised and scared the first time she learned that Natsuki knew about the family bracelets. But, everything that Natsuki had done afterwards eventually weighed out all doubts in her heart. She turned to Natsuki, and reminded the woman, "I believe that you once told me about a missing bracelet in your world, Natsuki."

Midori's face screwed up in confusion. "Your world? _Yours_? What?"

"Are these the bracelets you mentioned?" Shizuru held the bracelet up closer to Natsuki. She wanted to know. She needed to know if it was the very thing that had called for Natsuki's presence here—if it meant anything to both of them finding each other in this world.

A few moments of agonizing silence passed, and Natsuki shifted a little, uncertainty in her eyes. Her voice was hoarse when she spoke. "They didn't feel like the one I found in the forest. That one… it called out to me. I can still hear its whisper now, o—or in my dreams. Somehow, it doesn't go away."

Slowly, Shizuru looked down. She softly placed the counterfeit one in the wooden box. They were beautiful. They were as close to the original ones as possible. But Natsuki could still tell that they weren't the authentic ones. Midori had reported her about the accident of nearly losing the ruby bracelet in the woods, but neglecting any details concerning Natsuki.

Midori seemed to catch the cold air from her master. She sighed in defeat and confessed, "I dropped the ruby bracelet in the woods…, and Krurujer founded it. That was how she had seen the real bracelet."

Shizuru cared nothing for the story behind the occurrence, but what Natsuki had said. She moved her hand to the box, her fingers lingering over the ruby one. "You said that you heard its whisper?"

Natsuki shook her head. "Not this one."

At the response, Shizuru turned to Midori, and only after a long, harsh stare that Midori eventually gave in. The servant fished out the black pouch from her inner pocket and placed it on the low table.

Shizuru grabbed the pouch and studied it on her palm, her thoughts warring with one another. "You may go now," she finally said.

For a brief moment, Midori looked reluctant, and then she looked away. "If you should need anything, I will be right outside." She bowed and left the room through the garden side.

When Shizuru and Natsuki were left alone, Shizuru loosened the golden, woven cord, opening the pouch. She carefully lift the pouch and let the genuine ruby bracelet slide down to rest upon her left palm. Turning to look at Natsuki, Shizuru counted the seconds for Natsuki to react. She waited for Natsuki to say something—anything. She needed any kind of confirmation, but no words came.

Then, a tear rolling down her cheek, Natsuki reached out and touched the bracelet

Shizuru turned her gaze back to the gem that its color very much matched her own eyes. "What did it tell you?" she murmured. She, too, was mesmerized by its beauty and mystery.

Natsuki traced her fingertips along the golden surface. Her eyes glistened with tears, watching the gleams reflect upon the gem. "I've touched it before that night in the forest. No, long before that. It feels so familiar, Shizuru. I'm sure I'd seen it somewhere before… Long… long ago, it belonged to me…"

"Belonged to you?" Shizuru echoed. The notion should have frightened her. The bracelets belonged to the Fujino family, and no one else, especially not some stranger from a foreign land. However, with everything that had happened around them; the notebook, the ghost writer, the lavender scent and the missing bracelet—everything was connecting them together, simply making it hard for Shizuru to brush aside Natsuki's impression.

Beyond her defensive mind, Shizuru mused if 'Natsuki' in the past was really the owner of the bracelet like she claimed to 'feel'.

Natsuki shook her head, blushing in embarrassment. "Nah, it couldn't be, right? That's just silly. It couldn't have been mine." She picked up the empty pouch and lightly shook it. "Eh, where's the emerald one?"

Looking down in distress, Shizuru carefully put the ruby bracelet on her left wrist. It felt heavier than she had thought; she wasn't sure if she was imagining it, or its weigh actually came with responsibilities. If anything, she should keep it with her at all time now. She couldn't afford to lose both of them. "The other one went missing two weeks ago. Someone intruded the mansion, killed two guards, and stole it from my room. That was why I had Midori make a counterfeit pair. I cannot let my parents know."

"What!? The emerald bracelet was stolen!?" Natsuki's eyes widened for a moment, and she frowned. "Wait… wait, it was the ruby one that was missing in my world. How come?" Natsuki scratched the back of her head in frustration. "And why didn't the thieves take it as well?

Shizuru unconsciously mirrored the suspicious look on Natsuki's face, her hands clasped tightly on her lap. "Very good question. But, Natsuki, I am confused. Shouldn't the missing bracelet—this ruby one, be the thing that brought you here? If it wasn't this, then what was it?"

All these questions had been eating Shizuru up inside. She feared that all the hopes she had had to solve the riddle of why Natsuki was transported back into the past—or what exactly had triggered it—might never be answered. But what she feared the most was that every time Natsuki disappeared, she found her heart at the bottomless pit of despair. She wasn't sure why, or she wasn't sure if she was ready to face the true reason behind it.

When Natsuki saw the troubled look in Shizuru's eyes, she smiled in reassurance. "Hey, it very well could be. I feel that _it_ is. In my heart." Her tone was softer than usual, with a gentle clutch on Shizuru's hands. Then, a raised brow. "Or, are you so eager to find out how to send me back?"

Bewildered, Shizuru stiffened at Natsuki's implication. "Of course not. No, I would not want you to go. I—uh, I mean…" Blushing, she looked down. It had to be her first blush in a long while. Or, since another life—another time. Or, perhaps her psyche was just as weak as her body now, allowing Natsuki's words to affect her this much.

"I'm glad, Shizuru." Natsuki's words came so easy, and Shizuru looked up, curious.

Underneath the layers of sleeves, her fingers nervously trailed the bracelet around her left wrist. As she studied the contemplative, green eyes, she kept telling herself that she wasn't dreaming—that she was still alive, and Natsuki was sitting right next to her. Foolish as she felt, there was a touch of hope in her heart.

"You do not want to go back to your world anymore?" Shizuru couldn't believe her own question. She didn't like the way it was going.

"Well, yeah, I want to see my father and my friends again, but then… I don't know if I can do that now even if I was given a choice." Natsuki looked torn. Her gaze dimmed, heavy with conscience, and the look troubled Shizuru.

Shizuru bit back her heartache. She steadied her voice and assured, "I am fine now, Natsuki. You have nothing to worry about. If you want to leave, then do it. You are free—"

"It's not that. But, you see, I don't even know. I'm just… To tell you the truth, I'm not sure what it is." Natsuki shook her head, almost furious at herself. "You can't imagine how I had to watch you lay dying for days, weeks of uncertainty. It hurt just to see you hurt. I really thought that you were going to die. Well, everyone thought that. But I had to see you well again, and I… I did everything I could." She sighed heavily, rubbing her face with both hands. A hefty thing in Natsuki's mind that Shizuru couldn't decipher yet. "But now nothing else seems to matter. Not where I came from, or what I'd done. Jeez, I don't even know what this is, or what I'm doing, but I just want to be with you."

Shizuru involuntarily clutched the bracelet. She was surprised that she had been able to sit upright for this long today, a marvelous sign for a start. She wished for better things to come in the days to follow. But, she was even more amazed by Natsuki's blatant confession. Poor woman was blushing, mumbling more incoherent words. It was neither the first confession Shizuru had ever received, nor the most romantic one, but it was the first time her heart truly bloomed from hearing it. Like butterflies in her stomach. Like how comfortably a mermaid breathed under the sea. Like a walk in the clouds. With Natsuki next to her, somehow everything seemed possible.

_I even managed to rise from death, didn't I?_ Shizuru mused.

She clutched Natsuki's hands on her lap.

"And I want to be with you, too, Natsuki. I was…" Shizuru tried to recall the darkest days she had been plunged into, the abyss of nothing but pain, but no words could have described all the things she had felt then.

She had been in pain. She had been through torturous hell. Yet, she wakened to this new day and managed to find some light at the end of the tunnel. "I was in a very, very dark place. It was so cold. I called out for help, but nobody heard me. I was in such a great pain that I wished to die a thousand times over, but I held on only because I wanted to see you again. I do not know why myself, but you were the only thing that could penetrate the black walls around me. In my dreams—or—or my nightmares, you were the only one I thought of… You kept me alive, Natsuki." Shizuru breathed. "It is very selfish of me to feel this way, but for all the gods' love, I would not know what to do if you left."

Natsuki had halted. Her eyes widened at the words pouring out of Shizuru. Her hands were cold and unfeeling in Shizuru's grasp.

And, humiliation was all Shizuru felt now that she had to look away. Had she misinterpreted Natsuki's innocent goodwill into something of earthly, filthy desires that matched her own? Shizuru bowed, but inwardly grunted at the pain shooting through her wounds at the hasty action. She bit her bottom lip, a bead of cold sweat rolling down her forehead. "I—I am so sorry, Natsuki. I should not have said that. You do not belong here—"

Shizuru hadn't the chance to finish her words when a hand lifted her chin up, and a pair of warm lips capturing her own. She froze, staring blankly at the wall and the door behind Natsuki's shoulder. Natsuki was kissing her, deep and hard, feverish in desperation that drowned them both. Shizuru couldn't tell where the ardent affection came from, but it was starting to overwhelm her in absolute bliss. Before she knew, Natsuki had laid her down on the futon, most careful not to disturb her wounds. Their lips met again, needing each other, mingling and sharing their warmth.

Lying on her back, Shizuru whispered between their warm and wet kisses. "I… I am in love… with you…, Natsuki."

Her body tensed at the arousal, but her senses eventually slipped. Her mind began to focus on the bracelet again. It was burning her wrist like a hot, iron shackle. It pulled her back and deep, chastising her, locking her in the endless, dark, cavernous past that she saw no way out.

_Long ago…I have always been in love with you… _


End file.
